taiwopapaya:
Good evening Obukomena. i have read your comment and the advises giving to you. for my contribution. i had experience about your wife problem. its true your wife feel pain during sex and she will be avoiding sex. and also know that your wife baby is your child, because only little sperm remain in tips of penis can cause pregnant. for your wife your case, use more lubricant oil when you want to have sex with her, because of her virgina dryness and pain, she will feel the pain and enjoy the pleasure. you can also taking it step by step by putting lubricant oil on your one finger then two and message her, ask her how she feel. if she feel pain and enjoy it , then enjoy your wife. she will surrender to you gradually, until you will have your all desire. i wish you best.

My wife doesn't allow us to use any lubes.She cites health implications as excuse. She doesn't allow me to insert my fingers into her. Again, she cites hygiene. Now, what she does most times is that, she would turn herself facing the wall and gives her back to me (with her vagina tightly closed) , with the impression of: "just do what you want to do and let me be".

What I have been trying to avoid in this marriage is to take any action that will jeopardize my relationship with God. And if it happens that she has been using me and that she never had any feelings for me, then I will know what to do.

I am grateful for all your contributions!

OBUKOMENA:
My wife doesn't allow us to use any lubes.She cites health implications as excuse. She doesn't allow me to insert my fingers into her. Again, she cites hygiene. Now, what she does most times is that, she would turn herself facing the wall and gives her back to me (with her vagina tightly closed) , with the impression of: "just do what you want to do and let me be".

This is seriously serious,i know your kind of wife.Only a nasty and rough kinda guy can bring out the beast in her in the bedroom,she does not dig your kind of good and gentleman that you are.You will never understand.You will be surprised how she will turn a sex slave with her weird kind of man.

OBUKOMENA:
I married my wife three years ago and we had a child two years after wedding. Before we married, we actually dated for 5yrs. During this time, we were on a no-sex-before-marriage relationship.

On our wedding night, I realized there was something wrong with either of us, cos the sex didnt go well. I'd thought it was the fatigue caused by the day's activities. Subsequently, I noticed that my wife was always shouting and withdrawing from sex each time I penetrated her. I asked her why and she said the sex was painful.

My wife had been in a sexual relationship for almost 10yrs before I met her. I, on the other hand, had only had sex once in my 37 yrs (age I married). When my wife and I agreed to the no sex before marriage thing, during our period of dating, I started looking forward to our wedding night. I started fantasising on what sex would be like with my wife. I longed for sex with her....

How did she become pregnant? Ever since we got married, the kind of sexual intercourse we practised was one in which I would have to penetrate her ONLY with the tip of my joystick, or She pushed me away. Achieving full penetration was a mirage for me and it was frustrating and not enjoyable at all! I could not achieve that full penetration cos to her, it was paining her. That was how we had our sexual intercourse until she informed me she was pregnant. I didn't question the ownership of the pregnancy cos we are both Believers. I must sincerely say that it was DURING her pregnancy that I enjoyed sex with her. It was the period she allowed me to achieve that normal, full penetration I craved for. It was the period she was making those sounds typical of an intercourse.
We both paused sex until 3 months after childbirth.


From the time we resumed sex up till now, matters have become worse. This time around, no partial nor full penetration. All she wanted was for me to just rub my joystick around her vagina and she would cum. This, to me, wasn't my definition of sex. It's a frustrating and nightmarish experience. The sex that I so longed for It now looks like I am married to a woman without a vagina. This situation is killing me softly. I am dying inside. I don't know who to discuss this sensitive issue with for advice. Worse still, She told me bluntly that active, penetrative sex is a TURN OFF for her. She prefers passive sex. My wife doesn't even allow me to kiss her anymore. I guess she allowed partial penetration before childbirth cos she knew if i didnt penetrate her at all, she wouldnt get pregnant. Is this what I am going to live with the rest of my life?

NB: I had advised her to seek medical help; she said NO and that she didn't see it as a problem. I also advised her to use Vaseline during intercourse; she insisted it was inimical to her health. All other suggestions brought before her fell on deaf ears.

Pls, I need advice on what to do.


Modified: Pls, don't just view and ignore. I need your advice. I brought this matter up here cos it's a faceless forum. I will not seek help on Facebook cos it's a sensitive issue concerning my wife

go and do DNA test for that ur child asap. you'll be amazed by what I find out.



ur wife used the painful excuse as an avenue not to ave sex with u so as not to get pregnant for u, she has someone else. that explains why she gives it to u while she got pregnant. but op u bleeped up big time.




Do not waste time DNA test asap

Right now, I am not a happy man. I feel like I should just go to a place where she would never see me again. The thought that I can never get good sex from my wife drives me crazy. It drives me crazy cos I was the one who asked her hand in marriage. I am depressed.

Each time I got back home and set my eyes on her, I get really bitter; I become unhappy.

OBUKOMENA:
Right now, I am not a happy man. I feel like I should just go to a place where she would never see me again. The thought that I can never get good sex from my wife drives me crazy. It drives me crazy cos I was the one who asked her hand in marriage. I am depressed.

Each time I got back home and set my eyes on her, I get really bitter; I become unhappy.

..

Getting good sex should be your last worry.. What should be of worry is someone not loving you enough.. Instead sees u as an option.

peepydelano:
This is seriously serious,i know your kind of wife.Only a nasty and rough kinda guy can bring out the beast in her in the bedroom,she does not dig your kind of good and gentleman that you are.You will never understand.You will be surprised how she will turn a sex slave with her weird kind of man.

That's it here.. This is the real deal here.

peepydelano:
This is seriously serious,i know your kind of wife.Only a nasty and rough kinda guy can bring out the beast in her in the bedroom,she does not dig your kind of good and gentleman that you are.You will never understand.You will be surprised how she will turn a sex slave with her weird kind of man.

You may not be far from the truth, bro. The guy she dated for almost 10 yrs was a rough, weed smoker. But she kept saying she regretted her past life and that she regretted dating someone like him

OBUKOMENA:
You may not be far from the truth, bro. The guy she dated for almost 10 yrs was a rough, weed smoker. But she kept saying she regretted her past life and that she regretted dating someone like him

That is it,the word REGRET here could mean so many things and one of those regrets could be something weird her body have been used to and she blames herself for it because her good husband wouldn't dare such.Oga sir,arrange yourself.

peepydelano:
That is it,the word REGRET here could mean so many things and one of those regrets could be something weird her body have been used to and she blames herself for it because her good husband wouldn't dare such.Oga sir,arrange yourself.

But I have offered that we go nasty in bed. I have suggested we do all the crazy deeds in our sexual life. She has been the one declining. I was ready to go oral with her but she doesn't welcome the idea. Could you believe it that I have never seen my wife's clitoris? How could she be tormenting me like this?

To whom should I report this issue to: her mother, her father, her sisters, her brother, my family or our pastor?

OBUKOMENA:
But I have offered that we go nasty in bed. I have suggested we do all the crazy deeds in our sexual life. She has been the one declining. I was ready to go oral with her but she doesn't welcome the idea. Could you believe it that I have never seen my wife's clitoris? How could she be tormenting me like this?

As traumatizing as it is,begin to find what could be wrong with her,shes hiding something she's not proud of from you and that thing she's hiding is sexual related .Find out what that thing is.I have seen a case where a lady secretly contact her ex to make her wet before allowing her fiance to touch her.

OBUKOMENA:
To whom should I report this issue to: her mother, her father, her sisters, her brother, my family or our pastor?

Two persons her mother and the pastor. And pack some cloths, stat away from her for three days so she can do some soul searching. Along with her mother. Its time to act unpredictably



But if you are my brother, I'll say go find a genuine prophet as your wife to me is hiding something. Which you should know about. But I no say pentecostals would hardly want to do this. I recommend spiritually investigating your so-called wife

Darammliveth:
How on earth can you agree to a no sex relationship with a girl who is not a virgin anymore? Well the whole story looks fake to me because a sane man cannot tolerate such. Man pikin don suffer for punna hand o

Daramm savage!!!!

I dey follow you bumper to bumper , tell that brother man word!!!.You make girl suppose they beg to save her marriage Na you come dey beg am , even seek advice, where that guy dey stay ? �

Darammliveth:


My brother, the truth is that you already missed it from that very day you agreed to a no sex relationship with her. She has been using you! Wake up bro. And don't forget to run a DNA test for the child. Act like a man broman

Talking to the mother first will be more appropriate before proceeding to the pastor if the mum is unable to tackle the situation.

OBUKOMENA:
To whom should I report this issue to: her mother, her father, her sisters, her brother, my family or our pastor?

Ubunja

Martinez29


What do you guys have to say on this matter?

Na where MissJoy29 crawl out from

Hmmmm....

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OBUKOMENA:
She had changed from her old ways. This is what I am going through, bro.

Op out of this two things one is the problem.

1) your wife is a full blooded lesbian that is just using you for cover

Or

2) she doesn't dig you. If she is cheating on you, it is with a woman

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OBUKOMENA:
Thanks for your contributions!

Adding up the story put up there, is it possible that a woman can experience pains sexually this much OR my wife doesn't dig me?

Your wife doesn't dig you or she is a full blooded lesbian

kunleweb:
Na where MissJoy29 crawl out from

MissJoy29:

kunleweb:

How are you? I been don dey look for you.

kenodrill:
You are not the biological father of her child.your so-called wife has no emotional feelings for you.Divorce is not a crime.



Wake up from your slumber mR man!

This is what I wanted to say....but you took it from my mouth...

MissJoy29:

How are you? I been don dey look for you.

Look for me ke?.

I've been between Work and Quora . Nairaland is too toxic for my life. How's everything?