Good morning guys, hope your night was great.

Am in a dilemma right now actually don't know which decision to take at this moment.

Am so sorry am going to stress you guys with a little long right up.
I met my fiancee with whom we have been in a relationship for more than 4 years now and we are already preparing for marriage before the end of the year.

The issue started when the pastor who is counseling us told us we have to make sure we are open to each other and no secret should be kept away from either of us.

Now the issue is when we got home after the class i told her i don't want to keep secret from her anymore as been advised by the pastor and she also did insisting i start first which i did knowing fully well i haven't been that faithful as a guy to her. Actually when i met her she was a virgin, i was the one who dis flowered her, i knew fully well she has never cheated on me based on my own knowledge and understanding, she has been there for me even right in her days in school while she was doing her ND, she visits me anything she is free and doesn't receive calls from guys as expected from ladies who go about, we know each other password and we use each others phone.

When i told her how many girls have had things to do with while we are dating, how many have slept with while she was in school and even while she is around but unaware, i made sure i clear myself with the hope of entering our marriage without any secret even with those she suspected which i denied initially.

I was so surprised when she told me as well that she had a fling twice swearing its just twice with 2 different guys and am the cause of it. stating she only did it once with each of them out of anger and neglect. Although i knew very well am to be blamed in most aspect which she insisted anytime we had issues i always threaten her with breakup and name calling but i told her that is not enough reason for her to do such a thing because i know myself very well i can't stand the sight of a cheating woman that has always been the major causes of my break up and she has been crying insisting i pushed her when i told her i no longer want the relationship when she was in ND she met a guy when we broke up and when she came back we settled again and she left the guy and said she only slept with him once and the second guy was when she was doing her I.T we also had issue she insisted i was calling her all sort of names and she needed someone to confide in and that was how she did it and she regretted every bit of it and she has been praying to God for forgiveness and she doesn't know how to tell me but she swore with her life that those are the people and times she did it. and she is not happy with herself and begging i forgive her.

I know most people will be blaming me but its not a yardstick for her to cheat considering the fact that we never broke up as such. we have already done the introduction and engagement already about settling the list. Now am having different taught going through my mind, because i can not stand a cheating woman, over the years she has been so supportive and caring she has stood by me and am so very close to her family including her parents and they have been so supportive concerning our marriage plans. we have already bought some things needed but right now am still having such feelings inside me because i never expected such a thing from her everywhere both at my work place and where i live people call her my madam she has access to my house anytime no one will ever believe she can do such a thing deep inside me i believe those are the only people she had something with, she has been crying and apologizing and am tempted to call everything off which she has been pleading but again everything has been set date fixed, church is already aware am just confused since that day have not gotten myself and i just hope am not making a mistake.

However she has promised it can never happen again and if it does happen i should kill her or do whatever i please but am still worried. I don't know if am being selfish or not but am just restless.

Please i need advice here please i don't want to make any mistake any further because have also promised to make amend but the taught of it still coming all the time even when i told her i have forgiven her but i still get to remember it, i have even told her about our tradition severally once a woman is married she can't go out and have decided to be faithful but the taught of it still hurts me. Now i don't know what to do, its still between me and her i never told anyone of it.

Now am thinking if to go ahead or to cancel it am just worried and i know the kind of embarrassment and disappointment the both families might face please i need candid advice thanks and God bless you all.

OP, you cheated on her several times, you told her and apologized, everything was calm.
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She cheated too two times severally, and told you with an apology, and you want to die?
.
.

Please get yourself into sth more comfortable like burying yourself.

.

I have no problem with her cheating on you then but my concern is, why would she blame you for her promiscuity? Are you the one that opened her legs for those guys to fucck her?

You started first by apologizing for your reckless fuccks then, but she started first by blaming you to be the cause of her well planned fuccks with other guys. She's manipulating you!!

Let her accept full responsibility for her actions, just as you did.

.WALAHI YOU DEY CRAZE KWO? YOU Bleep ,SHE Bleep YOU DEY VEX?

You can't stand a cheating woman but you're expecting her to stand your cheating a*s?

You must be sick dude.... You cheated on her too..

Now that she told you she 'cheated' you're fuming.. (I can't even tag what she did as cheating)

Fvck you bro... Leave her, let her find someone who is better for her.

I'm sure if you guys later get married, you'll end up abusing her emotionally and mentally.

. I don't even know what to tell you.

Both of you are not yet matured to even be in a relationship talkmore of marriage if it took only a mere word from a pastor to make you both starts talking like fools.

Both of you cheated and have confessed. So no more secrets,go ahead with your plans but if you can't,allow her to go.

you confessed to have cheated on her and she confessed to have cheated on you also, what's the issue here exactly?
I'm positive I don't get your question.

You your own what were your reasons for cheating on her? Everyone should understand that what's good for the goose is good for the gander. It's quid pro quo okay garbage in garbage out. You didn't pay attention to her because u felt you had alternatives but now you realised you should take things a bit serious and your are angry she sort her own alternatives when you were cheating what's the sense in that. When you withdraw attention from a woman it registers on their subconscious you most probably have someone else and it's their prerogative to have their own flings as well so get used to it man.

I'm also confused here..you cheated on her severally,she forgave you..she cheated and you're confused, writing Epistles about how you can't stand a cheating woman?? Are you okay at all?? What stops you from forgiving her?
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If you don't marry her someone else will.

chatinent:
OP, you cheated on her several times, you told her and apologized, everything was calm.
.
She cheated too two times severally, and told you with an apology, and you want to die?
.
.

Please get yourself into sth more comfortable like burying yourself.

the matter tire me too.

Op is right to break up

why on earth would a lady sleep with another guy 2 for that Matter

chatinent:
OP, you cheated on her several times, you told her and apologized, everything was calm.
.
She cheated too two times severally, and told you with an apology, and you want to die?
.
.

Please get yourself into sth more comfortable like burying yourself.

I taya for OP oh...

Francislin, how are ur actions better than hers?

You have no moral right to feel she did any worse than u.

You cheated, she cheated.

U confessed, she confessed.

Just as she forgave u, u shud also forgive her.

U knew she was a virgin wen you started dating but u went ahead and disflowered her.

I think you are emotionally unstable (evidenced by ur history of calling her names) and if u can't see that u r trying to remove the log in her eye while ignoring the one in urs, then i mean no insult but you are being a hypocrite.

She cheated on you because of the way you treated her. You even accept the fact that you neglected her, called her names, bla bla bla...
You cheated on her several times and you're complaining because a cheating woman is beneath your standards?
She felt remorseful but you're here complaining.
Deal with your ego.. That woman deserves someone better

b

Blu03:
She cheated on you because of the way you treated her. You even accept the fact that you neglected her, called her names, bla bla bla...
You cheated on her several times and you're complaining because a cheating woman is beneath your standards?
She felt remorseful but you're here complaining.
Deal with your ego.. That woman deserves someone better

Come on fb

Guy man give her belle buh nor marry her. Turn her ur babymama mk u save ur money cuz na money u one go waste so. Nor say Wizdom nor clear u before u make waka oh!

Coolcalmcollect:
you confessed to have cheated on her and she confessed to have cheated on you also, what's the issue here exactly?
I'm positive I don't get your question.

She's yet to confess. She has to accept full responsibility for her actions first.. That is confession. She's just manipulating the young man.

chatinent:
OP, you cheated on her several times, you told her and apologized, everything was calm.
.
She cheated too two times severally, and told you with an apology, and you want to die?
.
.

Please get yourself into sth more comfortable like burying yourself.

Lol...its a fake story from a faker OP.

Have u seen such dûnmbness in one post before? These men always cry like banshees over every little thing and I wonder if their diicks are even functioning.

You confessed to lots of Shiite(many girls) but she confessed to just 2(after u briefly broke up) and now u are ranting and venting upandan looking for what exactly?


Fake ASS story and Fake ASS OP

What is good for the goose, is good for the gander. You cheated on her while dating her and she did same. Case closed.

Forgiveness is key in any relationship! You both have to forgive each other completely, if you want the Union to work.

And please, learn to control your anger by keeping your mouth shut, instead of the verbal abuse!


Go ahead with the wedding/marriage.

Why is it that some people can’t swallow the pill they so easily dish out? You cheated,she forgave you but you can’t forgive her for cheating? That’s how ‘he’ broke up with me cause I confessed to kissing a guy during truth or dare game where as he’s a serial cheat.

tyup:
Op is right to break up


why on earth would a lady sleep with another guy 2 for that Matter

HAHAHAHA. WHAT OF OP WEY SLEEP WITH MORE THAN 5 GIRLS? WETIN GO COME HAPPEN?

wizdomnzube:
Guy man give her belle buh nor marry her. Turn her ur babymama mk u save ur money cuz na money u one go waste so. Nor say Wizdom nor clear u before u make waka oh!

Ur moniker is an insult to true wisdom.


See the rûbbish u typed.

Froshloaded:
b Come on fb

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.
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Blu03:
She cheated on you because of the way you treated her. You even accept the fact that you neglected her, called her names, bla bla bla...
You cheated on her several times and you're complaining because a cheating woman is beneath your standards?
She felt remorseful but you're here complaining.
Deal with your ego.. That woman deserves someone better

So, calling names and neglect are now yardstick to cheat in a relationship??
OP, stay away from people who cant take responsibilities for their actions. They're worse than devil.

slimzpresh:
Why is it that some people can’t swallow the pill they so easily dish out? You cheated,she forgave you but you can’t forgive her for cheating? That’s how ‘he’ broke up with me cause I confessed to kissing a guy during truth or dare game where as he’s a serial cheat.

Men are more territorial than Cape buffaloes or the African lion. They hate the thought of their ladies being with another guy,in whatever form. Truth or dare game is still something he should understand. But since he cheats a lot,to BELIEVE you would be very very very hard

Leave her alone and move on. Please for the sake of your own sanity let her be and move on. Trust me they'll always be a thought of her cheating whenever you two are not around each other. Besides the thought of her past deeds will always hunt you.

Davash222:
I have no problem with her cheating on you then but my concern is, why would she blame you for her promiscuity? Are you the one that opened her legs for those guys to fucck her?

You started first by apologizing for your reckless fuccks then, but she started first by blaming you to be the cause of her well planned fuccks with other guys. She's manipulating you!!

Let her accept full responsibility for her actions, just as you did.

You're sick in the head...

You just made your comment all about the girl leaving the guy..

You've never made any sense before anyways

Davash222:
I have no problem with her cheating on you then but my concern is, why would she blame you for her promiscuity? Are you the one that opened her legs for those guys to fucck her?

You started first by apologizing for your reckless fuccks then, but she started first by blaming you to be the cause of her well planned fuccks with other guys. She's manipulating you!!

Let her accept full responsibility for her actions, just as you did.

You have a point,I must say.

She did that shiit herself. She wasn't forced or raped. Blaming it on OP(who was an ass for calling her names and all that,if true) kinda made it seem lame as an apology. She might have been driven by his callousness but she still made the decision to cheat. She did the 'u caused it' stuff to make him guilty and lessen her errors, a thing women are very very good at. Men also do it though.

She should apologise plainly without the subtle hints at manipulation. Although the fact that OP met her a virgin, gave her strong points in her favour

CallMeDrino:


You're sick in the head...

You just made your comment all about the girl leaving the guy..

You've never made any sense before anyways

The guy already accept full responsibility for his actions and apologized while the girl is blaming the guy for her reckless fucck with other guy.

Only a man is "justified " to cheat in a relationship...lol.......this life ehn!!!

luminouz:



You have a point,I must say.

She did that shiit herself. She wasn't forced or raped. Blaming it on OP(who was an ass for calling her names and all that,if true) kinda made it seem lame as an apology. She might have been driven by his callousness but she still made the decision to cheat. She did the 'u caused it' stuff to make him guilty and lessen her errors, a thing women are very very good at. Men also do it though.

She should apologise plainly without the subtle hints at manipulation. Although the fact that OP met her a virgin, gave her strong points in her favour

Exactly! I'm bothered over her manipulation towards the gentleman. Making him feel guilty for her actions .

That is my challenge. this taught keeps coming up all the time.

blinking001:
Leave her alone and move on. Please for the sake of your own sanity let her be and move on. Trust me they'll always be a thought of her cheating whenever you two are not around each other. Besides the thought of her past deeds will always hunt you.