like I said, be careful.
go and live with him for a few years in Dakar first and don't give him too much money. watch if his attitude toward you change.
does he ask you for money? does he ask you to bring him to poland? is he demanding? does his family ask you for money?

goodluck.

IloveFred:

I am sexually active. You can't imagine.

this doesn't matter. He could get sex from senegalese women in his country. why do you think he went online to find an European woman?

Thank you Jenifa for your advices. I want to be careful.

IloveFred:

I can make him happy. He was happy with me. He needed warm and gentle feelings. I can give him that. I can adjust.

We are not trying to change your mind here and we don't want to. What I understand about life is I cannot decide for people, but I can give them choices and options.

It seems your mind is already made up and have already married him. So take your chances and look ahead. I hope at this age, you understand that marriage is not a bed a rose. And marriage with somebody from a totally different background will even be harder to manage. And then marriage with someone with a totally different background, then with step-children involved wll be even more extreme

Goodluck

He didn't ask me for money, and his family too. He told me that he don't need my money but only love. He wanted to find somebody nice till the end of life. Maybe he didn't lie.

I don't think he wanted to find an european woman. But I think he wanted to live Africa. Maybe he thinks, in Europe the life is easier.

Okay. I had to reread the original post because I knew damn well she said African man and he is under 40 years old.  That man want some young punny.  If he doesn't have children something ain't right.

I know what is marriage. I divorced after 29 years. I tried to be a good wife but he wasn't a good husband. I wanted to divorce after 2 years, I regret I didn't do that. I need peaceful life now. Life is too short. I don't know what happen tomorrow.

Maybe he doesn't want children because he has a daughter yet. He don't want more troubles.

sorry - he doesn't want not don't

, and talking with him is a very good English school for me. I can't speak very well.

IloveFred:

He didn't ask me for money, and his family too. He told me that he don't need my money but only love. He wanted to find somebody nice till the end of life. Maybe he didn't lie.

When did you get married? Are you living together now or you are planning to bring him over to Poland?
Wow i'm surprised him and his family haven't asked you for money. That's a good sign. If they start asking you for money, be careful. Don't waste your life saving and hard earned money on something that may not be permanent.

Always keep in mind that your marriage is not set in stone and anything can happen. I think this sense of precaution will help you a lot.

IloveFred:

Maybe he doesn't want children because he has a daughter yet. He don't want more troubles.

sorry - he doesn't want not don't

You should ask him. Talk to him about it.
Most Nigerians love to have children. Especially male child. Does he have a son?

He hasn't a son, only daughter and he knows I can't have children, however I am too old

We get married in September 2010. We are planning to live in Poland. He lives in Benin in Nigeria. He leaved Dakar and his job, because he will be with me. He knows I am not a rich woman. I feel he is romantic.

I know for a fact! There are not too many YOUNG AFRICAN men marrying older NOTHING. BUT THEN AGAIN. WHO AM I.

Jenifa,

You said it. He doesn't have a male child and he only has a daughter according to the OP. You are exactly right NIGERIAN MEN LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE THEM SOME BOY CHILDREN. Believe me my husband reminds me of that EVERY DAY.

The fact she can't have children is a dream for many but let me hush. But you right, Nigerian men love children. That one thing I can't take from them they are excellent fathers (hush Jaybee) I can be nice sometimes.

But he has a daughter and he has to care about her, but now he doesn't work. Maybe he really doesn't want more children.

Lawd have murcee! Would somebody please come rescue me! Anybody? Furry Az? Dsense? Anybody?

IloveFred:

He hasn't a son, only daughter and he knows I can't have children, however I am too old

We get married in September 2010. We are planning to live in Poland. He lives in Benin in Nigeria. He leaved Dakar and his job, because he will be with me. He knows I am not a rich woman. I feel he is romantic.

you are right maybe he doesn't want more children. But I would ask him. How old is his daughter? Ask him why he only wants one child. Many Nigerian men are not ok with one child. No matter how poor they are.
How long did he live in Dakar for? Why did he leave his job in Dakar?
Why didn't he marry you in Nigeria? Were his family present at your marriage? How many people were there? Was it traditional?

what happened mrs, Eve?

There maybe trouble ahead while there is moonlight and music and love and romance, shine your eyes,

His daughter is 10. He lived with her mother without marriage, she was sick and died. His mother care about his daughter. He lived and worked in Dakar as a painter in a building company, but when I met him and went there to get married, he came back to his country, Nigeria, to submit his new documents and prepare to come over to me. Our wedding day was very simple, some friends, his family wasn't able to buy airtickets, they are not rich, they wished happy marriage on yahoo. I had a white long dress, very nice, he told it is a traditional dress, and with coral on my neck and hands. I was very happy, I don't need high life, I am not a queen. People feelings are the most important to me, not means.

In one of the threads on this site talked about how Nigerian men do not marry unless they are able to provide and afford to buy a house the wife move into.  I think it was under the Housing and Relationships thread.  Matter fact, it was Osama Bin Laden 10 that said it.

Germany have a large mixed Nigerian and German family communities. Interesting.

Mrs, Eve:

Germany have a large mixed Nigerian and German family communities. Interesting.

^^ because they all need papers! most abandon their wives never to bee seen again!

@poster shine your eye well well! your soo called husband is dodgier than the 5 day feta cheese in my fridge you better not fall for the scam.
there re plenty of men (even black ones) in poland dont let yourself get hurt!

nl is full of stories exactly like yours and trust me they never end well!

sometimes when things are too good to be true, they really are!

I know, men are not good (not everybody), but I want to believe he is good. Maybe I am right?

@Mrs, Eve (f)


Re: Marriage With A Nigerian Man
« #38 on: Today at 09:13:20 PM »
Okay. I had to reread the original post because I knew damn well she said African man and he is under 40 years old. That man want some young punny. If he doesn't have children something ain't right.

Mrs Eve,don't go there.I know a lot of 37 -42 years old men still single,without kids and excellent careers still hoping to find love, Not all 37yrs men are married,or with kids.And nothing definitely is wrong with them,

Damn that some bleeped up cheese you got!

If it was American men or Uk men that married an older woman usually they are younger men marrying older women and most of them are sugar babies. A VERY FEW OF THEM actually love them old hags.

But we are talking about AFRICAN MEN and I don't care how many FUBU and Sean John apparels they wear you can't take AFRICA out of an African man. They will still be some low down sommamishes and the fact she got a buncha children too. Hmm. Hell, African men ain't really going after women with too many children and older women when they don't have sons.

Did I mentioned AFRICAN MEN LOOOOOOVE BOY CHILDREN?

there is no way your right! in fact there is a big fat ZERO 0% chance he is good! the only way he will be good was if he was the president of Nigeria and was looking for somewhere to launder his money! that will be the best good you can get!
listen to this, every single nigerian man born and bred in Nigeria that you meet outside of africa is dangerous until extensively examined and fully proven beyond all reasonable doubt that he is not! you need to adopt those principles when dealing with them or you will be losing alot more than your heart!

zionmmv:

@Mrs, Eve (f)


Re: Marriage With A Nigerian Man
« #38 on: Today at 09:13:20 PM »
Okay. I had to reread the original post because I knew damn well she said African man and he is under 40 years old.  That man want some young punny.  If he doesn't have children something ain't right.

Mrs Eve,don't go there.I know a lot of 37 -42 years old men still single,without kids and excellent careers still hoping to find love, Not all 37yrs men are married,or with kids.And nothing definitely is wrong with them,

I know you gotten excited since your network finally worked.  I never said THEY WERE MARRIED.  Please read slowly next time, I hate repeating myself.  I said the man want young punny if he doesn't have children.  It is VERY SELDOM for an African man NOT TO WANT CHILDREN if they do not have CHILDREN.

Now you understand?

In your first post you said you lived alone for 8 years but you only divorced in 2010, Strange, So you met him on the internet so how soon after your divorce did you get married?

I divorced 1.06.2010 and met him later in June
I leaved my ex husband in 2002 and we were still couple, but lived apart. He was very vulgar.

We get married in September, after 2,5 months  or 3,5

So you met him the same month you divorced, When did you guys get married

IloveFred:

I know, men are not good (not everybody), but I want to believe he is good. Maybe I am right?

you may be right. but the chances are low. very very low in fact. You will be extremely lucky if he turns out to be good. that's rare.
the chances of finding a good man on the street of poland is higher than finding one off the internet from Nigeria. this is a fact. you are making a gamble here.
who knows you may be lucky. You already said that you took a risk. always look at it as a risk. the outcome might be disastrous.
But im sure it's nice to have a husband. who knows, you may be lucky. just expect the worst and don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Ask him why he was looking for love on the internet. It's easy to find a person on the internet because many people who go on the internet are desperate. Take your situation for example, you were desperate for affection. it is easy to take advantage of such a situation.

Well, come back and tell us in 2012 how things are going. Come back to proove us wrong so we can celebrate with you. I really feel for you.