Hello Nairalanders, someone sent this to me. he needs counsel, I'm sharing this on nairaland with his permission but I promised to keep his identity private.

"I am 24 years old and I will want to marry at age 28. I graduated from the university and I completed my NYSC Nov last year.
I am in a relationship with an 19 years old girl. The relationship has been fine and okay.
The problem I have is that I am a bit of the melancholic temperament, quite reserved and quiet.
The 19 years old girl I'm dating is as well a quiet and reserved person. Even though I talk to some extent more than she does but I'm afraid. My relationship is very boring, I can only imagine how my home will be if I finally decide to marry her.
I love this girl and she loves me genuinely but our relationship is very boring

I have other things I need counsel on but this is quite pressing in my heart.
Can you please advice me sir?

Thank you so much"

How is this an issue? Two people who love each other wants to get married... But no.. One is worried because of his reserved nature.. As if he was the one that created himself. Look two lousy people marries, also two quite people marries... Don't let your personality define your happiness... Worrying over unnecessary thing

your relationship is boring till you have children that's when you will appreciate her, she won't give birth to nairaland women type of personality

The young man is afraid his home will be boring. Both of them seem boring to each other.

who you wan kill with this grammar (melancholic temperament) abi na corona virus send you come tempt us for nairaland

That relationship if not broken now won’t end well if you guys proceed into marriage. Cases of Introverted individuals who got married were reported to breed phlegm. You Guys should first get you SWOT analysis rights and stop this risky assumption of personality. That same lady you think is quite might be so stubborn to another guy and with this said. You need to ascertain her personality tightly and study her. Ladies can pretend and manipulate you just to gain whatsoever her reason for been with you may be. So do not be deceived by any act she put on for now. Get you facts rights before thinking about marriage else you’ll only have your fingers to bite.

jawalis:
That relationship if not broken now won’t end well if you guys proceed into marriage. Cases of Introverted individuals who got married were reported to breed phlegm. You Guys should first get you SWOT analysis rights and stop this risky assumption of personality. That same lady you think is quite might be so stubborn to another guy

Wowww this is deep!

It appear dey both are introverts. So, been d guy in d relationship, he av 2 be d one 2 dictate d tune. He is responsible 2 paddle d canoe of such relationship affair. In as much as I don't support relationship of Introvert + Introvert been dat both parties r socially awkward, I wudn't rule out d possibility of it workin out, but d guy just av 2 be d one 2 do much of d work. Like, tk d bull by d horn.

I'm also an introvert thou, so I cud understand d boringness part. D advantage both parties just av is d fact dat, dey wud tend 2 understand each oda dan any oda.

If d guy still went on 2 option 4 an extrovert, d extrovert also wud later find him boring in d long run. Best bet is just Introvert + Ambivert, so he shud develop his instinct 2 be dat of an Ambivert so as 2 be able 2 flow well in d relationship.

My opinion thou!

lilmax:
your relationship is boring till you have children that's when you will appreciate her, she won't give birth to nairaland women type of personality

Hahaha
Which one is nairaland women type of personality again??

oazeez1991:
It appear dey both are introverts. So, been d guy in d relationship, he av 2 be d one 2 dictate d tune. He is responsible 2 paddle d canoe of such relationship affair. In as much as I don't support relationship of Introvert + Introvert been dat both parties r socially awkward, I wudn't rule out d possibility of it workin out, but d guy just av 2 be d one 2 do much of d work. Like, tk d bull by d horn.

I'm also an introvert thou, so I cud understand d boringness part. D advantage both parties just av is d fact dat, dey wud tend 2 understand each oda dan any oda.

If d guy still went on 2 option 4 an extrovert, d extrovert also wud later find him boring in d long run. Best bet is just Introvert + Ambivert, so he shud develop his instinct 2 be dat of an Ambivert so as 2 be able 2 flow well in d relationship.

My opinion thou!

This is priceless.
Can you give more light to being an Ambivert?

Spark2:


Wowww this is deep!

I wish you well my brother. But again, pls be very careful. Don’t trust any woman until you leave this earth. They can maneuver their ways just to get whatever they want. Some ladies are smart. And to me. You seems to have been carried away by the fact that she’s just 19. You’ll be surprised if you take your time to eyewatch her moves and she’s caught in her privacy. She might probably put on those attributes you see as fascinating just to get you over.

Then make it lively

Spark2:


This is priceless.
Can you give more light to being an Ambivert?

It means a person having characteristics of both Extrovert and Introvert.

jawalis:
That relationship if not broken now won’t end well if you guys proceed into marriage. Cases of Introverted individuals who got married were reported to breed phlegm. You Guys should first get you SWOT analysis rights and stop this risky assumption of personality. That same lady you think is quite might be so stubborn to another guy and with this said. You need to ascertain her personality tightly and study her. Ladies can pretend and manipulate you just to gain whatsoever her reason for been with you may be. So do not be deceived by any act she put on for now. Get you facts rights before thinking about marriage else you’ll only have your fingers to bite.

That relationship if not broken now won’t end well if you guys proceed into marriage. Cases of Introverted individuals who got married were reported to breed phlegm.

Do you have at statistics for this or just assumptions?

Spark2:


This is priceless.
Can you give more light to being an Ambivert?

Ambiverts are not common.. That said, no one has just one personality.... What people have is a primary (strong) and secondary (passive) personality. So just because you are quiet does not mean you don't have some outgoing traits.
Ambiverts have both reserved and outgoing traits in equal dose... They are not common

That said.. All these things are nomenclature and physiological jargons. Nothing is impossible

babyfaceafrica:


That relationship if not broken now won’t end well if you guys proceed into marriage. Cases of Introverted individuals who got married were reported to breed phlegm.

Do you have at statistics for this or just assumptions?

Get your ignorance ass of my mention. Do visit marriage counselor and check NAVES’B official pages and get your fact.

jawalis:

Get your ignorance ass of my mention. Do visit marriage counselor and check NAVES’B official pages and get your fact.

I don't condone insults... Thanks!

Your friend is just worrying unnecessarily...

babyfaceafrica:



I don't condone insults... Thanks!

Then you should have conducted your research we’ll be tackling others.

At the end of the day, they will create doubts, insecurity, suspicions, disbelief, unnecessary arguments, investigations, quarrel and then separation in the lovely relationship.



Nairaland ( Romance section) is the worst place to seek relationship advice.

Spark2:

The problem I have is that I am a bit of the melancholic temperament, quite reserved and quiet"

Oya go and modify those words u wrote above.
Person never chop breakfast na to come dey crack head ontop english!

Personality has different combinations and I don't believe two people with the exact same combination can fall in love so easily. Your reservation and hers aren't the same and can never be the same. That being said, how she reacts in the midst of familiar faces or topics will differ from how you would react. So, boring is only a word if you both can find normal ground to discuss things that matter in that relationship at the end of the day.

jawalis:
That relationship if not broken now won’t end well if you guys proceed into marriage. Cases of Introverted individuals who got married were reported to breed phlegm. You Guys should first get you SWOT analysis rights and stop this risky assumption of personality. That same lady you think is quite might be so stubborn to another guy and with this said. You need to ascertain her personality tightly and study her. Ladies can pretend and manipulate you just to gain whatsoever her reason for been with you may be. So do not be deceived by any act she put on for now. Get you facts rights before thinking about marriage else you’ll only have your fingers to bite.

Intelligent submission. It is true that two introverted melancholias give birth to dominant phlegmatics. Such mixture is not even advisable.

UyaiIncomparabl:


Intelligent submission. It is true that two introverted melancholias give birth to dominant phlegmatics. Such mixture is not even advisable.

This is wrong. The chromosomes do not carry temperaments so it isn't passed down through the gene and besides, temperaments are affected by environmental factors.

That's the worst thing that can ever happen in a marriage. Boredom.

Take the case of this covid 19 lock down and how the boredom that stemmed from it has made you feel. Some are already feeling suicidal. Yes!
So if she's the boring type in a relationship, she'll be more boring in marriage.

Now yesterday, I got chatting with someone who's been disturbing me all these while. But I sort of discovered he was boring. As in...the chat was not consistent and considering my bored state, I just told him outrightly that I'm not enjoying this chat. That its kinda dragging. He tried to make excuses for it that we only just started but I quickly looked for something and told him off. Mehnnn... I can't stand a boring person.
So, if she's boring, and you're not down with it, then she's definitely not going to make your marriage an enjoyable one.
Don't start what you can't finish.

Spark2:


This is priceless.
Can you give more light to being an Ambivert?

my brother you see yasef! Nairaland go make your case worse. It's like telling a Doctor to help with your headache and he says you have a chronic migraine

UyaiIncomparabl:


Intelligent submission. It is true that two introverted melancholias give birth to dominant phlegmatics. Such mixture is not even advisable.

una use Genotype Spoil Relationship and Now Una won Use Temperaments. Make Una Give Una Sef Brain oh

SirMichael1:


This is wrong. The chromosomes do not carry temperaments so it isn't passed down through the gene and besides, temperaments are affected by environmental factors.

Not only environmental factors. Temperaments are also hereditary. For further checks, refer to other verified sources.

Grow up first. When you reach that bridge, you'll find a way to cross.