| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by candyguyofficia(m): 9:55pm On May 19, 2020 |
Op first of all I must say you have a good mastery of English language even better than other post I have read on NL. Now to the issue, it's a fact that most girls of that age range are very unstable, materialistic and all. I will advise you do not entice her with materialism to avoid she showcasing fake love to you. I believe it is all important for you to ask the girl in question why her dad is not living with them or better put on why you have never seen her dad, I think its very important.
Conclusively do not trap that young lad with pregnancy for your sake because should her parent force you to marry her (which I know you will gladly accept) she may move in with you and may make living with her unpleasant, after all said and done not ALL that glitters is gold |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by laivwire(m): 9:58pm On May 19, 2020 |
You were deaf from a young age and can write as good as this? Interestingly doubtful |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by gregyboy(m): 9:58pm On May 19, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
Good day wonderful people, hope we are all doing fine?
I will go straight to the point.
I recently started dating this girl over one month ago and l sincerely loved her and intend to marry her anytime soon. It is not like l just met her or something, l have a saloon shop and she happens to live down the street my shop is located. In fact her elder brother is a close friend of mine and he always come to my salon to gist, charge his phone or just relax every night after work. So I have known her for a few years but just decided to start dating her a month ago.
I happen to be a deaf guy, as in l have permanently lost my hearing in both ears (it happens through a silly accident since when I was a child and all medical and spiritual efforts towards healing failed). I will appreciate if you will ignore my deafness and focus on giving me the advise l sought.
I have been totally focused on my salon business since inception, I mean l deliberately refused to have a girlfriend all this while until recently when I started thinking of marriage thought l do flow well with several girls on the street but never went beyond being just friends to them.
Now, this girl loves me and l so much loved her in return, I considered her too young for me (she will be 18 and legally an adult in September while I am presently 26) l made her understand from the onset that I intend to marry her but have no intention of rushing her into it now until she is at least 19 years old but she object to the marriage talk, saying she is afraid of her parents and that she still want to further her education (she is still in SS2). I considered dating for more than a year as a waste of time and resources.
Truth to God, my intention was to impregnate her when she is 19 years of age, every single senior person in my family, including my parents and uncles and aunts are more than ready to show solidarity by following me to her parents house to take responsibility for the pregnancy and officially ask for her hand in marriage to me. Then I intend to set her up in good business after her delivery. l honestly have no intention of sponsoring her education further as she isn't that brilliant judging by her level of literacy when chatting with me and l am too cautious of dating a student not to talk of marrying one.
I made her understand that she will never regret going into a business and that there is no guarantee that she will find a job easily after school due to the fact that this is Nigeria.
Although I am still living with my dad, but I have my own house almost completed, and l have decide that I will move in only after l might have had a child with my wife to start my family.
Of course I approached some of the other girls l consider as wife materials but their shakara and unseriousness is beyond my patience.
Now, this girl has started coming regularly to my shop whenever she get the chance, like when she is on errand for her mum and we usually chat for few minutes due to time constraints and her mum being strict and not allowing her any movement beyond 9pm at night.
I will appreciate suggestions on how l could squeeze out quality discussion out of the usually few minutes she came to see me because I am so new to this dating and relationship stuff ( l communicate by lip reading and l don't use or understand sign language and she is understanding in that aspect)
Her brother who is my good friend is very much aware of our relationship but there is very little he could do to enable us have a long free time together as the strictness of their mum include him too ( their dad doesn't live with them for reasons I am yet to know)
The love l have for her made me started showing her with gifts like footwears and l am about to buy her a small android phone so we can be chatting regularly.
Now l am not too sure if things will go about as l envisaged and we will eventually get married in two years time, or l might just be wasting my time due to her young age and strict mum.
I see myself getting married in two years time and l believe now is the right time knowing a girl well before thinking of marrying her and l am someone who has very little patience for the other girls doing excess shakara.
Your opinions, suggestions and advises will be appreciated.
O. P it won't end in tears dont mind those comments the lady likes you, not all ladies will even want to take chances with such disabilities But go meet her parents and tell them your plans for her if they tell you to wait fine be patient Nothing good comes easy.... Atleast four years or 5yrs from now anything you decide to do to her will be offical, if you marry her at her present age you may give her room to think of cheating in the future since she didn't really explore life, in all this be patient with her and still help her grow through those years Also help her out in her school probably a 2yrs course will be fine in the polytechnic dont be afraid she may cheat or leave you while in school Just zip your mind up on those, if she is yours she will be yours........ WHILE waiting you can still explore other ladies you may never know dont zip your mind on her only..... It may end up in tears if you do but be wise Just let the young lady experience life on her own first. for unseen circumstances and you wont also like a man impregnating your daughter at that age when it gets to your turn too as a father If you end up loosing her... Then it was all meant to be Remeber what will be will be 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Olayinka8793(m): 10:06pm On May 19, 2020 |
laivwire:
You were deaf from a young age and can write as good as this? Interestingly doubtful I became deaf at primary six but was already brilliant before then. Constant love for reading and writing was what made me become good with writen English. |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Rickmann: 10:12pm On May 19, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
Good day wonderful people, hope we are all doing fine?
I will go straight to the point.
I recently started dating this girl over one month ago and l sincerely loved her and intend to marry her anytime soon. It is not like l just met her or something, l have a saloon shop and she happens to live down the street my shop is located. In fact her elder brother is a close friend of mine and he always come to my salon to gist, charge his phone or just relax every night after work. So I have known her for a few years but just decided to start dating her a month ago.
I happen to be a deaf guy, as in l have permanently lost my hearing in both ears (it happens through a silly accident since when I was a child and all medical and spiritual efforts towards healing failed). I will appreciate if you will ignore my deafness and focus on giving me the advise l sought.
I have been totally focused on my salon business since inception, I mean l deliberately refused to have a girlfriend all this while until recently when I started thinking of marriage thought l do flow well with several girls on the street but never went beyond being just friends to them.
Now, this girl loves me and l so much loved her in return, I considered her too young for me (she will be 18 and legally an adult in September while I am presently 26) l made her understand from the onset that I intend to marry her but have no intention of rushing her into it now until she is at least 19 years old but she object to the marriage talk, saying she is afraid of her parents and that she still want to further her education (she is still in SS2). I considered dating for more than a year as a waste of time and resources.
Truth to God, my intention was to impregnate her when she is 19 years of age, every single senior person in my family, including my parents and uncles and aunts are more than ready to show solidarity by following me to her parents house to take responsibility for the pregnancy and officially ask for her hand in marriage to me. Then I intend to set her up in good business after her delivery. l honestly have no intention of sponsoring her education further as she isn't that brilliant judging by her level of literacy when chatting with me and l am too cautious of dating a student not to talk of marrying one.
I made her understand that she will never regret going into a business and that there is no guarantee that she will find a job easily after school due to the fact that this is Nigeria.
Although I am still living with my dad, but I have my own house almost completed, and l have decide that I will move in only after l might have had a child with my wife to start my family.
Of course I approached some of the other girls l consider as wife materials but their shakara and unseriousness is beyond my patience.
Now, this girl has started coming regularly to my shop whenever she get the chance, like when she is on errand for her mum and we usually chat for few minutes due to time constraints and her mum being strict and not allowing her any movement beyond 9pm at night.
I will appreciate suggestions on how l could squeeze out quality discussion out of the usually few minutes she came to see me because I am so new to this dating and relationship stuff ( l communicate by lip reading and l don't use or understand sign language and she is understanding in that aspect)
Her brother who is my good friend is very much aware of our relationship but there is very little he could do to enable us have a long free time together as the strictness of their mum include him too ( their dad doesn't live with them for reasons I am yet to know)
The love l have for her made me started showing her with gifts like footwears and l am about to buy her a small android phone so we can be chatting regularly.
Now l am not too sure if things will go about as l envisaged and we will eventually get married in two years time, or l might just be wasting my time due to her young age and strict mum.
I see myself getting married in two years time and l believe now is the right time knowing a girl well before thinking of marrying her and l am someone who has very little patience for the other girls doing excess shakara.
Your opinions, suggestions, and advice will be appreciated.
Trying to be clever by impregnating her could come to nothing in the end...Don't rush things, both of you are still quite young. I'd suggest u try and hold on to her for now till she is about 20 if u are truly in love with her and by that, u two will get to know each other better. At this point, everything will play out naturally. So trust me when I say u not stuck with her yet. 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by mrblessed(m): 10:29pm On May 19, 2020 |
I must not fail to commend your good knowledge and usage of the English language. You seem to you have two problems here: the young damsel and the consent of her family. That girl is pretty young, might not know exactly what she wants but she isn't too young to get married nonetheless.Then, there is the problem of societal influence that shames/stigmatises people with impairment, that is also a factor to examine. Whether you like it or not, it is something you must encounter as you interact with people.
The family, and not enough time to spend with her, is your greatest challenge, since it might seem easier for you to convince her than her family. Therefore, I think you need to establish a form of relationship with the parents, using their son who already knows you are dating his sister. Please, banish from your mind the vile thought of getting her pregnant, because it will make it more difficult than easy for you. Good luck to you. 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by FromZeroToHero(m): 10:58pm On May 19, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
My evil agenda? Damn it, that is a painful allegation. What is evil about planning to marry a young girl while setting up a business for her? Did you read the post at all? I am married and I didn't impregnate my wife before marrying her. If you really love her as you said then be a man and go straight to her family and seek for her hand in marriage. You and I know that the family won't agree that is why you wanted to impregnate her so that they won't have any option but to just accept in other to remove the shame. 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Dangrace01: 11:16pm On May 19, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
l use lip reading to communicate, thought not a very effective means, but it has served me well since childhood and l honestly dont understand sign language because l wasn't brought up with it. I heard something about hearing aid. Do you have an idea about it. Once you put it on you start hearing |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Davidoff2000: 11:57pm On May 19, 2020 |
pDudd:
It is here we will still judge your matter after she chops your money and dumps you for another guy.
Don't worry, we will still advise you when that happens. We are your brothers and we gats your back.
A 19 year old girl is still trying to flex and marriage is the last thing on her mind. Advice yourself o.
Oga life is compromise
She has nothing to offer, but she is whole. Atleast for now. Op has everything to offer, but he is stone deaf. So he doesnt have it all..so dont act like he is everything. But the girl.will dump.him.
Note to fellow guys: The OP has everything in life going for him: a good business, a house, money, progress,etc. See how he wants to entrap himself in a relationship with a girl who has nothing. Absolutely nothing. A girl who brings nothing to the table. He even wants to open business for her.
Chai  |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Davidoff2000: 11:58pm On May 19, 2020 |
pDudd:
It is here we will still judge your matter after she chops your money and dumps you for another guy.
Don't worry, we will still advise you when that happens. We are your brothers and we gats your back.
A 19 year old girl is still trying to flex and marriage is the last thing on her mind. Advice yourself o.
Oga life is compromise
She has nothing to offer, but she is whole. Atleast for now. Op has everything to offer, but he is stone deaff. So he doesnt have it all..so dont act like he is everything. But the girl.will dump.him for sure.
Id rather be poor and full.of hearing tham.be rich and deaff
Note to fellow guys: The OP has everything in life going for him: a good business, a house, money, progress,etc. See how he wants to entrap himself in a relationship with a girl who has nothing. Absolutely nothing. A girl who brings nothing to the table. He even wants to open business for her.
Chai |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by DaddyRochie1642: 2:14am On May 20, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
What will you advise l do now bro?
The girl l am talking about is well brought up and act more matured than some older wayward girls l know. She looks nothing like a potential slay queen as she was brought up by a strict mum.
And I feel it is only right that a girl of her age who
hasn't become wayward gets a God fearing and sincere guy like me. The way you are talking is exactly how Potential "Mugus" talk ... Better Shine your Eyes,.. you're still young, you're being Desperate, Channel Your Focus On Your Business and never Settle with someone that might end up being a Liability and thus Lead to your DownFall. That girl is coming Around You because she's Feeling Extremely Hórny and she probably needs sex because she's at an age and stage where female sex hormones are extremely high, So, don't Confuse "List" with "Like" bro. A word is enough for the wise |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by frugal(m): 8:48am On May 20, 2020 |
Seems like you're trying to brainwash her. I hope it fails tho. |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by dashpee: 9:40am On May 20, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
Good day wonderful people, hope we are all doing fine?
I will go straight to the point.
I recently started dating this girl over one month ago and l sincerely loved her and intend to marry her anytime soon. It is not like l just met her or something, l have a saloon shop and she happens to live down the street my shop is located. In fact her elder brother is a close friend of mine and he always come to my salon to gist, charge his phone or just relax every night after work. So I have known her for a few years but just decided to start dating her a month ago.
I happen to be a deaf guy, as in l have permanently lost my hearing in both ears (it happens through a silly accident since when I was a child and all medical and spiritual efforts towards healing failed). I will appreciate if you will ignore my deafness and focus on giving me the advise l sought.
I have been totally focused on my salon business since inception, I mean l deliberately refused to have a girlfriend all this while until recently when I started thinking of marriage thought l do flow well with several girls on the street but never went beyond being just friends to them.
Now, this girl loves me and l so much loved her in return, I considered her too young for me (she will be 18 and legally an adult in September while I am presently 26) l made her understand from the onset that I intend to marry her but have no intention of rushing her into it now until she is at least 19 years old but she object to the marriage talk, saying she is afraid of her parents and that she still want to further her education (she is still in SS2). I considered dating for more than a year as a waste of time and resources.
Truth to God, my intention was to impregnate her when she is 19 years of age, every single senior person in my family, including my parents and uncles and aunts are more than ready to show solidarity by following me to her parents house to take responsibility for the pregnancy and officially ask for her hand in marriage to me. Then I intend to set her up in good business after her delivery. l honestly have no intention of sponsoring her education further as she isn't that brilliant judging by her level of literacy when chatting with me and l am too cautious of dating a student not to talk of marrying one.
I made her understand that she will never regret going into a business and that there is no guarantee that she will find a job easily after school due to the fact that this is Nigeria.
Although I am still living with my dad, but I have my own house almost completed, and l have decide that I will move in only after l might have had a child with my wife to start my family.
Of course I approached some of the other girls l consider as wife materials but their shakara and unseriousness is beyond my patience.
Now, this girl has started coming regularly to my shop whenever she get the chance, like when she is on errand for her mum and we usually chat for few minutes due to time constraints and her mum being strict and not allowing her any movement beyond 9pm at night.
I will appreciate suggestions on how l could squeeze out quality discussion out of the usually few minutes she came to see me because I am so new to this dating and relationship stuff ( l communicate by lip reading and l don't use or understand sign language and she is understanding in that aspect)
Her brother who is my good friend is very much aware of our relationship but there is very little he could do to enable us have a long free time together as the strictness of their mum include him too ( their dad doesn't live with them for reasons I am yet to know)
The love l have for her made me started showing her with gifts like footwears and l am about to buy her a small android phone so we can be chatting regularly.
Now l am not too sure if things will go about as l envisaged and we will eventually get married in two years time, or l might just be wasting my time due to her young age and strict mum.
I see myself getting married in two years time and l believe now is the right time knowing a girl well before thinking of marrying her and l am someone who has very little patience for the other girls doing excess shakara.
Your opinions, suggestions and advises will be appreciated.
... good morning my friend, you didn't tell us how old are you.. marrying an 20 years old lady will be really terrible for you, until I get your age, I reserve my comments for now |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Olayinka8793(m): 2:13pm On May 20, 2020 |
dashpee:
... good morning my friend, you didn't tell us how old are you.. marrying an 20 years old lady will be really terrible for you, until I get your age, I reserve my comments for now l did mentioned my age as 26 while she is 18. |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by 6ixT8: 9:34am On May 23, 2020 |
hidhrhis:
How do u communicate when u hmm are deaf
Did she usually write in paper for u or what but seriously u are a wicked soul
U want to destroy her life by impregnating her
What gives u the assurance she won't secure a job after uni or she won't turn the tide around and become very brilliant in university
Their are some times the environment you stay or the people u associate with limit your ability
Don't impregnate someone's daughter ooo
Let her go to the university
And what make you think he can't communicate with is condition  |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by 6ixT8: 9:36am On May 23, 2020 |
Dangrace01:
I heard something about hearing aid. Do you have an idea about it. Once you put it on you start hearing someone like this would probably require a Cochlear implant I guess. |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by hidhrhis(m): 9:39am On May 23, 2020 |
6ixT8:
And what make you think he can't communicate with is condition I swear down no offence was intended I've never seen someone who is deaf but not dump before that's why I asked and I've been answered |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by 6ixT8: 9:41am On May 23, 2020 |
FromZeroToHero:
I am married and I didn't impregnate my wife before marrying her. If you really love her as you said then be a man and go straight to her family and seek for her hand in marriage. You and I know that the family won't agree that is why you wanted to impregnate her so that they won't have any option but to just accept in other to remove the shame. thoughtful! I think, its because of his hearing condition that he want to strike it from the back door. @Op, you have to man up and state your intention to her. of she agrees then proceed to her parent. Goodluck. 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by 6ixT8: 9:45am On May 23, 2020 |
hidhrhis:
I swear down no offence was intended
I've never seen someone who is deaf but not dump before that's why I asked and I've been answered they are many... try visiting these special schools they are there. even universities with faculty of education should host them. 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by Olayinka8793(m): 10:29pm On May 23, 2020 |
6ixT8:
thoughtful! I think, its because of his hearing condition that he want to strike it from the back door.
@Op, you have to man up and state your intention to her. of she agrees then proceed to her parent. Goodluck. Thanks for your input. I laugh at where you mentioned me striking from the backdoor but the truth is, it is close to impossible getting the approval of her parents for her hands in marriage without anything like pregnancy connecting us together. I think l should sat her down to discuss it with her throughly because if we continue with the relationship but eventually didn't marry each other, it will become a waste of my time and hers and Godbknows there is nothing l hate as much as wasting my time on unproductive ventures. 1 Like |
| Re: I Am Stucked With Her, Please Advise Me by stanliwise(m): 10:33pm On May 23, 2020 |
Olayinka8793:
Good day wonderful people, hope we are all doing fine?
I will go straight to the point.
I recently started dating this girl over one month ago and l sincerely loved her and intend to marry her anytime soon. It is not like l just met her or something, l have a saloon shop and she happens to live down the street my shop is located. In fact her elder brother is a close friend of mine and he always come to my salon to gist, charge his phone or just relax every night after work. So I have known her for a few years but just decided to start dating her a month ago.
I happen to be a deaf guy, as in l have permanently lost my hearing in both ears (it happens through a silly accident since when I was a child and all medical and spiritual efforts towards healing failed). I will appreciate if you will ignore my deafness and focus on giving me the advise l sought.
I have been totally focused on my salon business since inception, I mean l deliberately refused to have a girlfriend all this while until recently when I started thinking of marriage thought l do flow well with several girls on the street but never went beyond being just friends to them.
Now, this girl loves me and l so much loved her in return, I considered her too young for me (she will be 18 and legally an adult in September while I am presently 26) l made her understand from the onset that I intend to marry her but have no intention of rushing her into it now until she is at least 19 years old but she object to the marriage talk, saying she is afraid of her parents and that she still want to further her education (she is still in SS2). I considered dating for more than a year as a waste of time and resources.
Truth to God, my intention was to impregnate her when she is 19 years of age, every single senior person in my family, including my parents and uncles and aunts are more than ready to show solidarity by following me to her parents house to take responsibility for the pregnancy and officially ask for her hand in marriage to me. Then I intend to set her up in good business after her delivery. l honestly have no intention of sponsoring her education further as she isn't that brilliant judging by her level of literacy when chatting with me and l am too cautious of dating a student not to talk of marrying one.
I made her understand that she will never regret going into a business and that there is no guarantee that she will find a job easily after school due to the fact that this is Nigeria.
Although I am still living with my dad, but I have my own house almost completed, and l have decide that I will move in only after l might have had a child with my wife to start my family.
Of course I approached some of the other girls l consider as wife materials but their shakara and unseriousness is beyond my patience.
Now, this girl has started coming regularly to my shop whenever she get the chance, like when she is on errand for her mum and we usually chat for few minutes due to time constraints and her mum being strict and not allowing her any movement beyond 9pm at night.
I will appreciate suggestions on how l could squeeze out quality discussion out of the usually few minutes she came to see me because I am so new to this dating and relationship stuff ( l communicate by lip reading and l don't use or understand sign language and she is understanding in that aspect)
Her brother who is my good friend is very much aware of our relationship but there is very little he could do to enable us have a long free time together as the strictness of their mum include him too ( their dad doesn't live with them for reasons I am yet to know)
The love l have for her made me started showing her with gifts like footwears and l am about to buy her a small android phone so we can be chatting regularly.
Now l am not too sure if things will go about as l envisaged and we will eventually get married in two years time, or l might just be wasting my time due to her young age and strict mum.
I see myself getting married in two years time and l believe now is the right time knowing a girl well before thinking of marrying her and l am someone who has very little patience for the other girls doing excess shakara.
Your opinions, suggestions and advises will be appreciated.
Your plans are obviously very bad, one side and foolish. Like what the fu*k did I just read. You are just all about yourself, maybe you should make a rethink of your strategy. If you’re in haste of marriage then find someone else. Not a young girl with bright future at 19 been pregnant. Please be civil and get someone ready to get down to marriage. 1 Like |
