Freestainworld:
woman are like babies, you keep petting them every day no matter their age, the same goes to our mother's, father's usually prefer cash gift as they are less concerned about what you give and what you did not give them.

MrHighSea:
Good topic.

1. U com back after hustle to beat ur wife in front of ur <8 yrs old, ur hustle is null n void.

2. Children run wen u com back n u pride urself dt dy respect u. Environment bcms tensed with ur presense. Ur presence at home is toxic.

3. U refuse to listen to those little kids. Be forming macho.

4. U can never tell ur kids "I'm sorry", " Daddy care", "surprise visit at schools". Do sth to improve their self esteem. Not beating/shout at them in the presence of everyone.

Little ittle things. Create healthy bond when they're young.

I've seen a man stay alonebin a duplex while three of his kids stay in a flooded 2bd room flat with their Mum. Mum dt z not earning much. Two kids r earning little. None cares abt the man n his properties. I followed them closely.

Bj5all:
Most fathers do not allow their love to be felt by their children. Most fathers Labour so hard for the family but spend little time with them to make them understand his sacrifices. On the other hand, a mother spend almost all her time with the children, they see her suffering and pain, fathers sacrifices are mostly outside of the home and as such are not felt by the children.

Children especially male children come to value their dad after they too are married.

As a father, take time to explain things to your children, they will value and respect your sacrifices when they understand what you go through to keep the family

Bola146:
Because 90% of mothers suffered more on their children. Intimacy and caring too contributed to it.

Mindlog:
Beyond the monetary, some fathers feel lonely without even being widowers in their old age even where the grown up children make material provisions but emotionally disconnected because their fathers did not emotionally bond with them during their formative years.

I recall attending the burial of a Catholic Priest's father some years back, while delivering the oration the Reverend Father broke down in tears while other Priests held him. He recounted how despite them being a poor family how their father struggled to raise them, every evening took out time to follow up with their academics despite being a Prison warder and his directions helped him and his siblings not to go rogue as was normal with children growing up in the barracks. How he led prayers every morning in their home and always encouraging them that no matter what they were going through he believed his children' hard work through education would turn things. That he had lost hope of sitting for his form 5 (SSCE) as the exam fees was not paid up to the last day of payment but the father went to sell the bicycle he rides to work and gave him the money and told him as long as he was alive he must complete his secondary school education in order to stand the chance of being admitted into a seminary to train to become a Priest he had always dreamt of. The father passed on 14 years after he was ordained a Priest in Italy and he really pampered the father while he was alive.

Zabiboy:

OP,
Its due to social conditioning..
Most times( if not all), after giving birth, women stay at home 24/7 to take care of the child while the father goes to work....So the child spends more time with his/her mum...
While spending time with the mum, she Both subconsciously and Consciously makes the child feel like she cares more than the father...
Subconsciously---- "Bobo, if you touch that thing, i would tell your daddy when he comes back and he'll flog you"....
Consiously------ "I want you to grow up and achieve far more what your father has"....
All this then makes the child feel more loved by the mother and tend to show her more love..
Anyways, it's down to the individual

bukatyne:


Which is why the father has to build his relationship with his kids.

Not rely on the wife to do that for him.

I have said this story here before: I happened to witness a beautiful scene:

A Keke driver drove his kids round the street while their mother made akara for them to munch during the ride.

How would those kids doubt the love of their father?

During the ride, there is no way he wouldn't ask about school, their friends and teach them some life lessons.

Little things go a long way most times.

To make the akara and fuel to drive round might not cost up to N1k which the father can save all through a week as bonding session.

Zabiboy:


You have a point @emboldened...
But work these days are demanding
Only a determined man( determined to have time for his kids) would try hard to squeeze out time....
And once again, women play a part here....For example
*husband comes back and junior is asleep
Wife: dont worry honey, no need to wake him up, Tomorrow i'll tell him you asked how school is...And she ends up not telling the child anything...she'll go ahead to even encourage him to be more hardworking ( in order words, leave the child's care for her and focus more on work and money)....

But anyways like i said, its down to the individual....

J111333:
Suffering for children does not start and end with cooking for, bathing and breastfeeding them. No, it's way beyond that my friend.

A lot of men are irresponsible no doubt but the few responsible ones go extra miles in suffering for both the wives and the children.

To the topic. Some mothers do not expose the kids to the sacrifices of their fathers on time and kids naturally go the direction of who physically puts food on the dining table.

By the time the kids grow up to understand the reality on ground, daddy has gone to the great beyond after long hard work.

I didn't know that my dad had properties and bought shares in my name even while I was still in mum's womb until I grew up. Guess what, he is dead after all those struggles. He was tough, a great disciplinarian and mum was soft and great cook so as a kid who could I have naturally fallen in love with more?

MrHighSea:
Good topic.

1. U com back after hustle to beat ur wife in front of ur <8 yrs old, ur hustle is null n void.

2. Children run wen u com back n u pride urself dt dy respect u. Environment bcms tensed with ur presense. Ur presence at home is toxic.

3. U refuse to listen to those little kids. Be forming macho.

4. U can never tell ur kids "I'm sorry", " Daddy care", "surprise visit at schools". Do sth to improve their self esteem. Not beating/shout at them in the presence of everyone.

5. As the eldest, If ur sublings can't comfortably discuss " uncomfortable" topics with u, na so e dy start.

6. Within 9 months u can be a Father, u need to create friendship to really that win Kiddo's heart.

7. Show love to mum n grandma. Simple, just tease n hug them for 5seconds once in 2years,make everybody see, lol. TREAT THE WOMEN RIGHT. Why? Once the kids know the source of mum's happiness is Dad, my guy u don blow. Its a subconscious thing.

8. I'm describing my late grandpa. Grandma joined him within 3months. Both farmers. They were in love. They quarreled. Argued. Introverted man with fans. Kids loved him esp after beating them, lol.

Na so I com back work, my neighbour 6yrs old pikin who was scratching is father's car see me run, other innocent kids run join, i pursue am enta dia house, i warn am, beg am, make e no dy run wen im see me biko. Lil dude is abt studying wat i studied. I've a friend in him.

Little little things. Create healthy bond when they're young.

I've seen a man stay alonebin a duplex while three of his kids stay in a flooded 2bd room flat with their Mum. Mum dt z not earning much. Two kids r earning little. None cares abt the man n his properties. I followed them closely.

9. Kneel down, pray for them, not urself. How will sm1 be selfish with prayers. Even if ur a gangster/Atheist just wish them good audibly, there z always a paradigm shift.

10. Create fun memories, carry laptop enta him room for Saturday night, watch comedy skits with him, let him handle the mouse. Very cheap n deep fun. You'll bcm dt guyman uncle of his/hers.

11. Once a year have a papa n pikin time with him, sth impromptu, ask him questions, make him express himself. Go n get juice, dnt send him.o
Pour for him. Treat him like a lord.

Let the foundation be solid, whatever happens later no go too shake their perception.

coputa:
Happy father's day, The man/father is the head of the home,he provide food,pays the rent,cloth the family,in the course of these,he sometimes forget himself i.e making sacrifices to make ends meet.But when the children grow up,they tend to give more to the mother than the father,some even forget their father.if a child gives the father 10k,it means the mother has gotten 40k.Why?,is the father not important or is it that mothers brainwashed these children or that children are more emotionally attached to their mothers.

Greatzeus:

Years of bias and instilled false indoctrination on the mind of people right from childhood that fathers are beasts why mothers are sweet loving caring etc.
Have you ever heard an Artist dedicate a song to his or her father? Rarely but there are songs made constantly to appreciate mothers.
There's just a single day dedicated to fathers in a year but multiple days dedicated to mothers.

coputa:
Happy father's day, The man/father is the head of the home,he provide food,pays the rent,cloth the family,in the course of these,he sometimes forget himself i.e making sacrifices to make ends meet.But when the children grow up,they tend to give more to the mother than the father,some even forget their father.if a child gives the father 10k,it means the mother has gotten 40k.Why?,is the father not important or is it that mothers brainwashed these children or that children are more emotionally attached to their mothers.

coputa:
last december,during one end of year party held for children and was air in NTA,the children were told to greet their friends and love one's,do you know that 80% of the children greeted only their mother's. Men should wake up to the antics of the women folks.,they should reap the fruit of their labour.