n1ky:
As a woman does not deserve a money from a guy...... Yes very true....then a woman should not turn herself to housemaid by dating a guy just by cooking for him, washing his clothes.... you are not his house maid dear.

Ladies work for your money and dont look up to them for money when you can work for your money and please don't turn to housemaid for a man jor

There are two sides to this though

MrBrownJay1:


sadly, African society, chivalry, and most importantly KONJI, is the reason why A) many dudes willfully spend recklessly on these women, and/or B) women use this "stingy" label to try to shame men into paying against their will (while there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with being stingy).

It's better to be called stingy than to be labeled MUGU..

HeavenlyCherub:


I’m going to share with everyone on this thread something my cousin shared with me this past week. She basically said this quote describes me. Ladies please never ever make the mistake to date a stingy man. I myself give in a relationship, I give a lot. I will not date a stingy man or broke one ever again. They will drain your soul. Also don’t entertain men that invite you over to cook for them instead of them taking you on an actual date when you’re just getting to know them. You set the standard for how they treat you for real. My cousin was right. This quote truly describes me and trust me if you are not willing to compromise to take me on an actual date where you will spend your money I will not do it...

https://www.instagram.com/p/CCoAXEMJIMw/?igshid=hp85ah2v0xyp

in case you’re wandering what my fragrance is. It’s creed love in white $500 a bottle. I refuse, I refuse to entertain stingy men. I’ve done it twice and I will never do it again. Learn from my lessons

Will you keep quiet

You dated broke men and stingy men too? Na only you waka come ni?

You keep meeting irresponsible men and as usual you put the blame on stingy or broke.

Stop using emotional manipulation and terming it fried rice. Its a relationship,not a means to satisfy your material wants. Funny enough, women who bring nothing to the table are always the first to shout 'broke men'

Haywhymido:
Take it from me as well, If you marry a stingy lady, your children will suffer.

E pain am.

Keji1012:
*Some women are not sensitive enough to know when something is going wrong in the life of their men until they stop getting money from him like they used to. Those women intuition are controlled by money. These set of women are the most dangerous women to live with. This is why most men died silently without their women knowing the true cause of their death. Presently some husbands are depressed and some live with HBP and their wives aren't aware because they are still bringing money home. Some of these men have dipped their hands into terrible things that are killing them silently just to please their wives. Hmmmm!*

That's because they never loved the man, they just loved what he could provide and what he was providing for them, besides men these days have commoditize love and loving, there's so much confusion about what love is and what love is not , that's why the quickest , easiest descriptives for when a guy likes or supposedly loves a girl, you'll hear "he's kind, he's generous" and when guys are stingy ,it means he doesn't love the girl and that he's "stingy"... Truly love precipitates giving and altruism in relationships and romantic affairs, but then such shouldn't be done out of the need to grease or rub anyone's ego or entitlement to be taken care of...the best relationships I have had are the ones where giving was done out of love by both parties and a need to satisfy someone else's entitlement mentality,any woman that rubs that in your face doesn't give a flying Bleep about you,i have been with women who would give their last cash to me ,even the ones who would empty their account for me and I did same for them ,even though I'm no longer dating some of them, we still help each other out financially till date, there are girls and there are women, find your woman , leave the girls alone

prettyGabby:
I don't need a guy's money, that's why i always tell women to work for themselves and don't depend on men for money

Shine on jare

Alexaonfleek:
Nice thread op.
Stingy guys are very annoying to date,and most of the guys bashing you will not even want their sisters to date a stingy guy.
You can imagine visiting your bf and he can't even out of politeness offer you water to drink.
Or you get him a gift for Christmas and the only thing he does for you on your birthday is to send WhatsApp message.
Speaking from experience....

Ehya...e pain you ....chill out ,guys go through the same steaming cave of lava all the time , immediately a chick does that nonsense to me ,i just reduce my likeness percent from 100 percent to 25 percent, that 25 percent is to see if she'll change and see that the world doesn't revolve around her, things like that you don't have to tag him stingy, he might just not be into all the mushy birthday atmosphere, I'm that way too ,but I always find a way to make the day special for the people I care about...laslas not everyone is meant for you, that don't mean they're stingy

HeavenlyCherub:


To add to my comment above. Better be with someone who has less and gives than one who has plenty and refuses to add to you.

I’ve seen this play out with some men.. one babe I also knew.. her guy always looked amazing in the best of the best but could not sow into his girlfriend. If you saw them together you would never believe they’re dating.

Some of you men admire women who are not your girlfriends because they look good. Someone is taking care of that woman if she is not doing it on her own. The grass is green where it is watered

Another useless comment...

Shame no dey catch una ni...
Is dating synonymous to motherless babies home that someone must just carry your bills.

Yet your moniker is heavenlycherub? You think those cherubs have this annoying entitlement mentality in heaven?

sharone21:
The Op is 100000 percent right.... It is OBVIOUS Nairaland is filled with boys who type rubbish and get 1billion LIKES and think they have said something worthwhile BUT aren't in touch with reality.... Same people will not give to God citing reasons they listed for not giving to women.... Men of these days are not like our fathers, if u can't shower & spoil your woman when there are no kids no matter how small, is it when u now have kids and responsibility that u will now spoil her when u already have such bad stingy habit....Your wife will just be looking like your mum( lol) ? You see y many marriages lack fun & quickly withers? Promiscuity has also increased among married women who would normally out of fear of God not engage in it but because of lack of love, care , stinginess & selfishness of their husbands-- some with same mentality will not go the extra mile to provide for their families( cuts across all tribes).
Anyway, God will bless us with people based on our desires..... Is it not best to be a lady with your own money and with a guy who is NOT stingy and if only stingy ones come your way, be ALONE?

It is best since you can't work to even afford the most basic of necessities.

lisa286:


His loss
I have been a blessing to all I meet

Says only YOU!!!

Alexaonfleek:
LMAO!!!!
OBO kwa

You see...
A good number of guys(not all) won't like to accept money from a girl....maybe just the occasional gift.
And yet,most guys go about calling girls stingy.
The question really shouldn't be 'Ladies,what do you have to offer your man'
The question should be 'Men,what do you really want from your girl'

Number 1 thing we need ,

1.Stop doing Shakara Olooje

2.Nigerian women should learn emotional intelligence, it would help you women a lot and we guys, imagine dating and getting married and you don't even know when your men his depressed about things and struggling alone within himself with work, family ,finance ,all of those thoughts all alone, while you the supposed gehfren nah only make-up, parties, selfies ,social media , cooking be your cup of coffee, different opinions are allowed ,but I think women of these days need emotional intelligence, they're really lacking in it , though men hide a lot of things too ,but how can you open up ,when your woman is emotionally daft , my advice to guys, please marry your friends , date your friends or meet women you can be friends with easily, then chasing women who are too deluded ,stop chasing women who live in their own heads, life's too short to be with women you can't even have great conversations with,peace

Filmdirect:
Female speaking:
Please spend your money on your parents, they struggled for you. Help them out. Other than that, you are only obligated to spend on your wife and children.

You can be generous with a girlfriend but that’s within reason; dinner, movie, an event here and there. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to have a good time. She also should be generous on you.

You should not be responsible for her rent, school fees, business idea, hair and clothes etc. Your relationship is not transactional, she is not your wife.

A good woman shows ambition, just like a good man does. Instead of being broke or stretched by a girlfriend, use your money to invest and build a side business for yourself.

But some men are paying for everything to assuage their ego and because they need a trophy girlfriend to feel accomplished or lauded by friends.

Good one, I already gave the same points

sharone21:
The Op is 100000 percent right.... It is OBVIOUS Nairaland is filled with boys who type rubbish and get 1billion LIKES and think they have said something worthwhile BUT aren't in touch with reality.... Same people will not give to God citing reasons they listed for not giving to women.... Men of these days are not like our fathers, if u can't shower & spoil your woman when there are no kids no matter how small, is it when u now have kids and responsibility that u will now spoil her when u already have such bad stingy habit....Your wife will just be looking like your mum( lol) ? You see y many marriages lack fun & quickly withers? Promiscuity has also increased among married women who would normally out of fear of God not engage in it but because of lack of love, care , stinginess & selfishness of their husbands-- some with same mentality will not go the extra mile to provide for their families( cuts across all tribes).
Anyway, God will bless us with people based on our desires..... Is it not best to be a lady with your own money and with a guy who is NOT stingy and if only stingy ones come your way, be ALONE?

So ur existence is dependent on what a man spends for u?

Haywhymido:
Take it from me as well, If you marry a stingy lady, your children will suffer.

Keep crying

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lisa286:


His loss
I have been a blessing to all I meet

Yinmu........Big time.


‘All I meet’.............has any wifed you?

lexy2014:


Same thing we are saying sweetheart. If u are economically productive & useful, u won't need to depend on any man for livelihood. But since u aren't, u go abeging, that's y u see who is stingy & broke. Unfortunately, u are both beggar, stingy & broke rolled into one. Inasmuch as I wouldn't want u to end ur existence by taking sniper, I can only advise that u get urself a job& be a giver urself

Is it that you guys think you won't ever spend in a relationship or what? Cause I'm beginning to think some of you don't know what being in a relationship mean.

Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash, aren't they all part of dating? Are they done for free?

Sixfeetbelle:


Is it that you guys think you won't ever spend in a relationship or what? Cause I'm beginning to think some of you don't know what being in a relationship mean.

Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash, aren't they all part of dating? Are they done for free?

Don't mind these boys.

Pelxmiye:


Ehya...e pain you ....chill out ,guys go through the same steaming cave of lava all the time , immediately a chick does that nonsense to me ,i just reduce my likeness percent from 100 percent to 25 percent, that 25 percent is to see if she'll change and see that the world doesn't revolve around her, things like that you don't have to tag him stingy, he might just not be into all the mushy birthday atmosphere, I'm that way too ,but I always find a way to make the day special for the people I care about...laslas not everyone is meant for you, that don't mean they're stingy

The thing really pain me I no go lie

Oga,I'm talking of an ex that cannot even buy #200 pinup earring for birthday or christmas,whereas I got him something on his birthday and for Christmas.
I've gone to his place a few times and he has never even offer me water to drink....and I spent a good number of hours with him.
If I'm going to his house and I have small change with me,I'd buy him something even if it's just corn.
He kept saying he loved me but he has never given me anything with his money.
Will you even want your sister to date that kind of guy?
I just reasoned everything one day and I was just tired.
Mo japa...blocked his number and moved on!!

Pelxmiye:


Number 1 thing we need ,

1.Stop doing Shakara Olooje

2.Nigerian women should learn emotional intelligence, it would help you women a lot and we guys, imagine dating and getting married and you don't even know when your men his depressed about things and struggling alone within himself with work, family ,finance ,all of those thoughts all alone, while you the supposed gehfren nah only make-up, parties, selfies ,social media , cooking be your cup of coffee, different opinions are allowed ,but I think women of these days need emotional intelligence, they're really lacking in it , though men hide a lot of things too ,but how can you open up ,when your woman is emotionally daft , my advice to guys, please marry your friends , date your friends or meet women you can be friends with easily, then chasing women who are too deluded ,stop chasing women who live in their own heads, life's too short to be with women you can't even have great conversations with,peace

Na una dey carry una body dey date slay quens who mostly care about iPhone and Brazilian wig.

Sixfeetbelle:


Is it that you guys think you won't ever spend in a relationship or what? Cause I'm beginning to think some of you don't know what being in a relationship mean.

Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash, aren't they all part of dating? Are they done for free?

Kindly explain to me d meaning of a relationship. Seems u no d meaning. Are u in a relationship because of d following:

"Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash"?

If u don't get these in a relationship, is ur r/ship not complete? Must these things be done for u? I can see cash in your list. Don't u have a means of livelihood that u now see relationship as d source of cash for u?

Lastly, kindly compare what u said above with d comment which I made earlier& tell me d correlation

lexy2014:


Kindly explain to me d meaning of a relationship. Seems u no d meaning. Are u in a relationship because of d following:

"Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash"?

1. If u don't get these in a relationship, is ur r/ship not complete?

2. Must these things be done for u? I can see cash in your list.

3. Don't u have a means of livelihood that u now see relationship as d source of cash for u?

Lastly, kindly compare what u said above with d comment which I made earlier& tell me d correlation

Seems your understanding of what a relationship entails is different from mine if dates and hangouts are not a part of yours.

1. I know I am in a relationship if I can go on dates with the person, if we can meet for lunch and dinner at places, if we can go to cinemas on our free days, if we can spend birthdays together. None of that is for free for the guy, even if I pay for my own meal. If I don't get all these in a relationship, it isn't complete. Dating means exclusivity and should be shown by actions.

2. Why must these things not be done for me? I'm dating him, aren't I? Shouldn't there be a difference in what he does for and with me than what any random somebody does for me? My brother can take me shopping and I expect my boyfriend to not see it as anything if shopping is there.

3. I have a means of livelihood. However I don't see how I can say I'm dating someone if I don't have any special moments with them exclusively vis dates and hangouts I mentioned earlier.

I didn't see your initial post, but I'm beginning to see your idea of dating someone is different from mine, so hasta la vista

luminouz:

Another useless comment...

Shame no dey catch una ni...
Is dating synonymous to motherless babies home that someone must just carry your bills.

Yet your moniker is heavenlycherub? You think those cherubs have this annoying entitlement mentality in heaven?

I’m not entitled at all and I said what I said, I’m the type of woman who will do anything for my man by God’s grace if I have the money. Why should I settle for any less. A lot of people can say what they want on this blog I don’t care. I used to apologize or feel sorry for God’s grace and blessing over my life but I will not, sorry. You can never guilt trip me into doing so. You my dear are used to women who aren’t confident and can talk down to. Not me. I’m God fearing confident and I’m a good woman. I will not settle for someone sent to drag me down in life.

Sixfeetbelle:


Seems your understanding of what a relationship entails is different from mine if dates and hangouts are not a part of yours.

1. I know I am in a relationship if I can go on dates with the person, if we can meet for lunch and dinner at places, if we can go to cinemas on our free days, if we can spend birthdays together. None of that is for free for the guy, even if I pay for my own meal. If I don't get all these in a relationship, it isn't complete. Dating means exclusivity and should be shown by actions.

2. Why must these things not be done for me? I'm dating him, aren't I? Shouldn't there be a difference in what he does for and with me than what any random somebody does for me? My brother can take me shopping and I expect my boyfriend to not see it as anything if shopping is there.

3. I have a means of livelihood. However I don't see how I can say I'm dating someone if I don't have any special moments with them exclusively vis dates and hangouts I mentioned earlier.

I didn't see your initial post, but I'm beginning to see your idea of dating someone is different from mine, so hasta la vista

U didn't see my initial post but u gave a response to d post u said u didn't see.

U still haven't been able to explain what a relationship is since u say I don't no d meaning. So kindly explain to me d meaning of a relationship.

So obviously, u are in a relationship because of d following:

"Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash"?

So according to u, these are what define relationship. Must these things be done for u? Y must they must b done for u? Are u handicap? I can see cash in your list. Don't u have a means of livelihood that u now see relationship as d source of cash for u? If u say u are working, then y is cash on ur list? What's wrong if u sponsor d so-called "special moments"?

Toks2008:


Don't mind these boys.

Pls define boys and define men

luminouz:


Will you keep quiet

You dated broke men and stingy men too? Na only you waka come ni?

You keep meeting irresponsible men and as usual you put the blame on stingy or broke.

Stop using emotional manipulation and terming it fried rice. Its a relationship,not a means to satisfy your material wants. Funny enough, women who bring nothing to the table are always the first to shout 'broke men'

Oh sweetheart I am the table. I love God, I’m hard working, everything I touch prospers, I help those I love by his grace, I’m humble. I will do anything for the right man. Anything I touch prospers. That is because I try understand other people’s perspectives first on why they think how they think before bashing them. I totally blame myself for dating men like that once upon a time, I was foolish. a relationship is about give and take. You give and take in love, support, respect, commitment. Word of advice. Sow into your loved ones you won’t regret it.

lexy2014:


U didn't see my initial post but u gave a response to d post u said u didn't see.

U still haven't been able to explain what a relationship is since u say I don't no d meaning. So kindly explain to me d meaning of a relationship.

So obviously, u are in a relationship because of d following:

"Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash"?

So according to u, these are what define relationship. Must these things be done for u? Y must they must b done for u? Are u handicap? I can see cash in your list. Don't u have a means of livelihood that u now see relationship as d source of cash for u? If u say u are working, then y is cash on ur list? What's wrong if u sponsor d so-called "special moments"?

I already gave you my response.

But you are yet to give me a breakdown of what your relationship is about. So no dates?

Sixfeetbelle:


I already gave you my response.

But you are yet to give me a breakdown of what your relationship is about. So no dates?

U haven't given anything. Ur comment was in response to this:

If u don't get these in a relationship, is ur r/ship not complete? Must these things be done for u? I can see cash in your list. Don't u have a means of livelihood that u now see relationship as d source of cash for u?

U still haven't said what a relationship is since u said that I don't no what it is. So what is a relationship?

Meanwhile, these are still pending:


So obviously, u are in a relationship because of d following:

"Dates, hangouts and meet ups at cinemas, etc. calls, car rides and texts, birthday messages and celebrations, random gifts and cash"?

Must these things be done for u? Y must they must b done for u? Are u handicap? I can see cash in your list. Don't u have a means of livelihood that u now see relationship as d source of cash for u? If u say u are working, then y is cash on ur list? What's wrong if u sponsor d so-called "special moments"?

Toks2008:



You are still reading upsidedown. I understand that ladies input emotions into their comprehension but i never knew some guys do too. Read your comment again and see if they correlate with the write up.

Where did i write that a guy should give 10% of his salary? was that not an allegory?

And where on earth did you read that a man's love is directly proportional to how much he's willing to part with?

Seems una jjust wan type for the sake of typing.

Make i ignore una abeg. I no get strenth. If my thread no make sense to una then make una go back to primary school to learn how to read and comprehend....Abeg make i go piss go back to bed.

Guy.... He totally dissected your poor write up.

The excerpt he quoted from your hogwash of a post buttresses the fact that a man's love is proportional to how much he is able to part with...... What other way are we supposed to understand that "if a man really loves a woman, he will give her"

TF are you saying man

So I'm only loved on the premise of what I can give. Shior

luminouz:


It is best since you can't work to even afford the most basic of necessities.

I am NOT the lazy type which u easily seem to tag Nigerian ladies.....FYI, Nigerian ladies do not & will never fall under the category of lazy women in the world.... I'm sure you saw your dad not spoiling or pampering your mum in anyway, so no one to take a cue from.... Abi before wife, no be girl friend? Local man....