deepwater:


Emma
I asked you a question the other day u bone me

Please what is the question?


You can ask at the appropriate thread

CaveAdullam:
As a man, putting a woman above your goals is one of the most dangerous simping mistake.

MBBS ko, Doctor fa.......better be ready when she finally shit you like a poo after graduation.

Be simping there.

“Taken out of my head”

emmanuelewumi:



Please what is the question?


You can ask at the appropriate thread

Ok I will
Thanks

mmadu4:


Shut up abeg which uplift ? You are a lady so you will always support your fellow leech weather good or bad I don't expect anything less .

Apart from her being leech, what other adjective do you have for her? This insult you threw out, is it because you saw "f" in my moniker? Remove your tainted glasses about ladies and read the post again.

You people are so quick to judge and that's why ladies will keep taking advantage of you and leaving you with bitter experiences. Op said he's doing this for her because he wants to. He's not expecting a reward for it. That's selflessness which you know nothing about cause you have never been selfless. Human beings never forget acts of charity done for them and these case will be an example of such.

captaininiobong:
Get her a small phone. if you can open a small business for her to be independent
. nothing is worst than bringing a girlfriend to your place of hustle.

don't be surprised you can do heaven and earth for her and another person go marry am

she won't even invite you for her wedding

Haba! U want her to add salt to Op injury? You're not nice

Sixfeetbelle:


Apart from her being leech, what other adjective do you have for her? This insult you threw out, is it because you saw "f" in my moniker? Remove your tainted glasses about ladies and read the post again.

You people are so quick to judge and that's why ladies will keep taking advantage of you and leaving you with bitter experiences. Op said he's doing this for her because he wants to. He's not expecting a reward for it. That's selflessness which you know nothing about cause you have never been selfless. Human beings never forget acts of charity done for them and these case will be an example of such.

Because he's Father Christmas? Or because he has extra to spare? He's doing all that because they're dating each other with the hope of getting married! Is op in love with or dating another girl besides this girl? Just look at the way you interpreted everything op said up there! I hope this guy doesn't commit suicide because the outcome doesn't look favourable to him based on what you interpreted here.

authority2006:


Because he's Father Christmas? Or because he has extra to spare? He's doing all that because they're dating each other with the hope of getting married! Is op in love with or dating another girl besides this girl? Just look at the way you interpreted everything op said up there! I hope this guy doesn't commit suicide because the outcome doesn't look favourable to him based on what you interpreted here.

Read this thread from page 1 to 4. You'll see where he said the bold.

Besides, this is what will save him if this relationship goes sideways. Women are fickle and expecting to marry them just because you sent them through school has had more negative results than positives. If he removes his mind from marriage, he is safe either way.

Lol on some comments up there.

Bia OP, you need to love your neighbor as yourself, but you don't love yourself. If you get yourself worked up "unnecessarily", you might injure your body - developing high BP. Nothing stops you from re-evaluating and reassessing everything. Don't let your business suffer please. That is your number one life line after God Almighty.

Then sit here down and explain to her your challenges. There's no shame about it. Just like one lady up there said, if she sees a rich dude, she will leave and also if she finishes the guarantee she will stick with you is not there. So why don't give your business the desired attention now?

I don't knw anything but here's my thought!

Tbh the moment u show her the door, she will leave and get anoda sponsor, wat she's trying to do is to hold onto u as long as possible to help her finish her medical degree in school, that's just the truth but if u feel that she likes u, winch is very unlikely, I mean she likes that she's leeching u and not u in person, if u tell her to go, within few days she would hop to anoda horse and run that one kwa to the ground! So is really ur choice, but if u re thinking that at the end of it all she will marry u, then u re mostly day dreaming! This is the leech attitude of girls & u will count ur losses at d end!

PS_Ask her wat she really sees both of u being, her body language would tell u a lot, don't listen to her reply, its all lies watch the body language and sense any sign of being uncomfortable or tensed, grilling of teeth or nervous that's how u catch a liar!

Goat Don tie wrapper

Here. Re

nkemdi89:
If he feels that he is being used , let him just stop.

full stop

If you employ someone else,won't you be paying the person salary.you are saying this because you know her,
See finish is very bad.i wont be surprised if her salary is not up to 20k

toyetade:
To spend on her and sponsor her is not the problem but her attitude when she become a full Doctor and begin to behave strangely. Please be careful. I sponsor my wife in the Uni and even migrate together to the western world, I dare not remind her of all I have done yet any small quarel, she's so abusive. I spend on her entire family but they are so unappreciative. If not God who prospered me, I would have suffered. Be careful, she can be okay now because she need you but can be a pain when she does'nt need to depend on you anymore. If she agree to be in relationship without you committing your money to it, it will be okay. Keep your money and your plan away from her

you are wise my brother

never date and support a student financially - it almost never end well

More than a decade ago, I dated this girl I met on the day I was leaving Nigeria after a short visit - we met at the airport as she was seeing a Rev Sister in her parish off and we got talking and one thing led to another we exchanged numbers - i got to the states and we kept communicating and she was an undergrad at UNILAG then - and after a few months of chatting and phone calls - she started complaining how her parents are not supporting her education because they were poor bla bla bla and initially I was so reluctant in sending her anything - but after a while - I said to myself - if this girl calls me all the time and we laugh and joke and open up all the time about life's dreams, and matters- why not just give her even if its 20k to survive a bit - that's not up to what I spend in going out on a Friday night to hang out with friends- so I sent her 20k like 3 times within a year and I was not expecting anything from her - I just felt like helping afterall the money i sent cant buy me anything tangible - its beer money here - afterall she is a "good girl"

cut a long story short - i had to get some documents from a business partner who was having housing issue and going thru a divorce, who resides in Ibadan and I sent this girl 10k to go to Ibadan from LAGOS to get the documents and keep it safely for me as I was planning on coming to Nigeria in a few weeks time (although I didnt open up to her I was coming to Nigeria - I wanted to surprise her) - she took the money and she didn't go and she started avoiding me.

I was stunned - and furious because it was important that she does, after promising me she will- do you know when we got into a little heated argument - I just told her - "girl, I am disappointed u didnt go get those documents- afterall each time you call to tell me ur problems- at east I show concern - only once and the first time I asked you to do something for me, you didnt.... she thundered in response, "what and who do u think u are ? because you live abroad, you think you can just order me around? - or is it the little change you gave me? Did I send you to help me? hmmm thank God she never begged me for money oooo bla bla bla - I froze!!!!

This girl didnt even realize that I was planning to empower her with $5,000 to open a provision store so she can study in there and sell - then still go to school - I was trying to surprise her with the package because I was already developing feelings for her. After she insulted the living day lights out of me - I simply knelt down and thanked my God I didn't give her that money and I celebrated like for a week - because she pretended for 15 months as being so sweet and caring and a PRETTY wife material that I almost made a blunder - N60K in a year of benevolence and N10k for an errand she didn't honor are nothing compared to $5,000 I would have given to this ungrateful girl

so - if you do not desist and leave this girl alone - when she graduates and starts working - you will hear things like

1. did i send you to help me?

2. what did you do for me that someone cant do?

3. is it not your mate that take their gal to shop in MARS and the MOON?

4. ordinary food, phone and tfare you gave me, you are shouting - are you this broke ?

5. what's your own - did i not give you kponmo?

6. when your mates were serious with life- you were chasing after women - (as if she is not the woman that ate you dry)

7. I beg make we hear word, when people are talking about opening a business - you sef will be talking

8. which kain yeye business u open - is laundry business a business ?

9. I am not the one who wrecked you oooo - please go and look for those who ate your money

10. what did you spend for me - calculate it and I will pay you back - nonsense (that is if you are lucky she has any integrity)

OP - stop dulling yourself and leave this gal alone - you are are not Jesus Christ and let her go and meet her father for help. Chikena!!!!!

LordNicvuitton:


Yes I understand your stance, however I'm old enough to date and I would love to settle down in a few years.

Go to jiji and look for a good second hand android phone. Must it be new? There are good tecno phones you can get for 15k

.

LordNicvuitton:


I want to respectfully keep our intimacy life out of this bro, but just know that I'm her 1st definition of a true love. Most of what you typed, are positive words and i thank you. I've never stopped encouraging her. She has the potential to be a life partner (trust me, I have had experiences to know this) but the financial burden is the negative in all these.

The burden is huge but it is obvious you really like her and think well of her, I want to ask, if the roles were reversed, how would you want her to behave towards you? Whatever answer you get is your reply. She will not always be dependent on you, do you want it to stand between you both that you once got tired of helping her or you want her to always remember that you stood by her through thick and thin? Medicine is a good course so she will soon be okay. Why not just marry her?

LordNicvuitton:


I want to respectfully keep our intimacy life out of this bro, but just know that I'm her 1st definition of a true love. Most of what you typed, are positive words and i thank you. I've never stopped encouraging her. She has the potential to be a life partner (trust me, I have had experiences to know this) but the financial burden is the negative in all these.

bro, ill suggest u bear with her, she is not the typical slay queen that feel entitled to yr money..from ur writeup , its obvious she adores u, and also see u as her benefactor..though i must confess u are taking a big risk, cos women can change anytime (too much financial investment on her can be too risky, what if she leaves u in the long run)..i can see she is a nice gal, since uve fallen for her already, just bear with her..
but as for me,i cant date a gal from a poor background, atleast she should come from a middle class family...i cant afford to carry all her families burden on my shoulders..

Sit her down and tell her the condition on ground, suggest reducing her salary and cutting down on some expenses and see how she'll feel. If she's a good one she'll accept but for the phone, look out for second hand android phone and get for her so she downloads the notes again. She should reason with you

LordNicvuitton:


Yea bro, God can speak through strangers, that's why I shared this burden here. It actually made me restless last night cos i feel like i may give up, if things continue like this. I have a long way to go In life and age isn't really on my side. Thanks.

since you are paying her salary, just give her small part of the money you can afford then she completes the rest

"Ooooooooooommm" That's what train said. Matter tire person. My advice to you: Don't make her feel bad. You stated she helps you with the laundry while you are at work. Meaning you will still have to hire someone anyways if she's not there. For now she's your eyes in your business. Look at the positive side of things. Fulfill the promise of getting her a phone. Please be patient a bit more with her. She may be your help tomorrow. Things changes o... My brother the life is not balanced. Pray about it too.

[quote author=CaveAdullam post=92209367]Mangina/simp detected.

Fu¶ off![/quote6]
self-servicer get raut of my site.

[quote author=CaveAdullam post=92209367]Mangina/simp detected.

Fu¶ off![/quote6]
Oaf get raut of my site.

Never have a girlfriend while you are struggling.

Dont be too generous.

Dont live beyond your means.

Never displease yourself to please someone.

Put your self first in all things.

Never let the help you render affect you.

A man should be strong emotionally.

Have multiple source of income.

Never close your mouth, you never can tell who would
help you.

Your condition is the not the worst.

You yourself is the most important thing, family comes second.

Dont trust people easily

cedricksly:


Bro I understand where you are coming from..... Trust me God will reward u for watching out for her financially, my advise is you must not get her a phone with huge price.... Even if it is a low range phone of 35k below she should manage it.. U are buying it because its a necessity to her education not because u just want yo make her smile that u should explain to her and make her see ur laundry need also which you are halting a bit to support her with the phone....... During are medicals she can fend for herself... And if she is appreciative enough, one of the days in future she might be the one helping u even if not financially or u both aren't together anymore..... Are u not surprised why you are still afloat in business even if she is stressing u financially Because to everyone in life there is always a helper which God won't let drained financially because of those dependent on him or her.... God knows where u fail financially(God forbid) so many others destiny fails as well.... Thats why u are still afloat in business....

NOTE: Don't expect anything in return or expect her to marry u because you helped her while In school, that's Entitlement, and when she doesn't trust me ur will be destabilise and feel she is ungrateful.. Do for her whatsoever you can afford to let go if that time comes... And don't make her feel indebted to you... This will help you

I love your comment but you would have advised him to stay away from anything relationship with the lady and help her with all his heart. Just like you have said he should not expect anything from her. If you are helping a person who you want to marry, such kind of help can not get God's attention. God is not interested in the help you render to someone you want to marry, God is more interested in the help you offer to they Refugees, orphans,widows, widower's, Strangers, Elderly, those who do not share the same faith with you, Those who call you enemy. All that matters to God in your relationship is that both of you stay away from all manners of sin, sexual immorality inclusive.

Most notable experience people have said it all here, carry on as you are doing if you knows she does appreciate and you have plan for future with her, in the absence she will be prostituting every where. Staying with you stop her doing that to survive and she is appreciating it. Good luck

Sixfeetbelle:


Apart from her being leech, what other adjective do you have for her? This insult you threw out, is it because you saw "f" in my moniker? Remove your tainted glasses about ladies and read the post again.

You people are so quick to judge and that's why ladies will keep taking advantage of you and leaving you with bitter experiences. Op said he's doing this for her because he wants to. He's not expecting a reward for it. That's selflessness which you know nothing about cause you have never been selfless. Human beings never forget acts of charity done for them and these case will be an example of such.

you are just talking nonsense, selfless? what the OP is doing is called foolishness and it's costing him, the girl in question I'm sure have parents relation, brothers and sister extended family and so, why must she allow the guy to be footing all her bills is she handicapped? cant she gets a side job? she has seen a poverty elevation opportunity and she took it I don't blame her . if she truly loved him or cared she won't accept that salary YES he said he did/doing it because he wants to . so how is that uplifting? he is being drained financially and its not a joke. especially now that the economy is harsh on everyone . if the case was reversed do you really think she will stand by him and support him? you girls are always on the receiving end, thankfully men are now waking up, otherwise, OP will not come on here to ask for advice. a quick question for you? if the man goes broke helping her do you really think she will still stand by him and support him be his side? so please before you talk think well. no man owes any woman anything except they are married, period.

You're blessed Bro,
Honestly ehn, I'm looking for any intelligent female medical student to support like this.

You fit give me her contact? Thanks

mmadu4:




you are just talking nonsense, selfless? what the OP is doing is called foolishness and it's costing him, the girl in question I'm sure have parents relation, brothers and sister extended family and so, why must she allow the guy to be footing all her bills is she handicapped? cant she gets a side job? she has seen a poverty elevation opportunity and she took it I don't blame her . if she truly loved him or cared she won't accept that salary YES he said he did/doing it because he wants to . so how is that uplifting? he is being drained financially and its not a joke. especially now that the economy is harsh on everyone . if the case was reversed do you really think she will stand by him and support him? you girls are always on the receiving end, thankfully men are now waking up, otherwise, OP will not come on here to ask for advice. a quick question for you? if the man goes broke helping her do you really think she will still stand by him and support him be his side? so please before you talk think well. no man owes any woman anything except they are married, period.

Okay.

LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.

It didn't go down well with me when I read that you placed your girl friend on a monthly salary. You paid your secretary monthly, it doesn't matter if your sacratary is also you gf. That part was pure business.
If you are able to then help her without grudges. You don't even know how and where the blessings you have been enjoying were coming from. I am telling you from experience.

LordNicvuitton:


I appreciate your kind input. She actually does the laundry in my absence (I work in a hospital within that area) so that when I'm back, I steam and package the clothes, just that i foot her daily meal and daily transport and then pay her monthly. She asked me for it, instead of her staying at home and she also knows that she won't get those extra privileges elsewhere, that she gets from me.

You don't love her and it seems you are not yet mature enough to have a committed relationship. Quite a shame that you are going to lose a woman who would have been very loyal and grateful to you in future and who would probably even have elevated you.