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Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? - Romance - Nairaland

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Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by MP007(m): 4:45am On Jul 02, 2007
This is very serious o, i need answers,
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by vronnie(f): 5:14am On Jul 02, 2007
not at first but after some time
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by Sati(m): 5:46am On Jul 02, 2007
Takes a lotta maturity and depends on the kinda person you and your ex are. Also depends on the kinda relationship y'all had. It'll take time don't rush it. coz I'm sure somewhere along the line you've both said things that hurt (females r excellent at doing that) and you'd be tryyna get back or just holding a lotta anger. IT'LL TAKE TIME Usually the 1 that tryies to bridge the gap is usually the bigger person. Calling once in a while jus to check up on d person won't kill you. Make sure you don base for ur side first coz e no get how the person'll always be part of ur life (thats if the relationship was serious enough). there r a lotta factors here that matter but I think you know what to do. Pride would have been a major factor is the breakdown and will still matter a lot whether it'll work as friends or not. take ur time see how it goes.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by MP007(m): 5:47am On Jul 02, 2007
Sati:

Takes a lotta maturity and depends on the kind of person you and your ex are. Also depends on the kind of relationship y'all had. It'll take time don't rush it. because I'm sure somewhere along the line you've both said things that hurt (females r excellent at doing that) and you'd be tryyna get back or just holding a lotta anger. IT'LL TAKE TIME Usually the 1 that tryies to bridge the gap is usually the bigger person. Calling once in a while jus to check up on d person won't kill you. Make sure you don base for your side first because e no get how the person'll always be part of your life (thats if the relationship was serious enough). there r a lotta factors here that matter but I think you know what to do. Pride would have been a major factor is the breakdown and will still matter a lot whether it'll work as friends or not. take your time see how it goes.


sati thanks, that was awesome

Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by iice(f): 5:49am On Jul 02, 2007
Yes, am friends with them all grin
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by MP007(m): 5:51am On Jul 02, 2007
icce the freak
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by omogenaija(f): 5:52am On Jul 02, 2007
@ MP007 can u stay friends with them

it depends . but probably not
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by iice(f): 5:55am On Jul 02, 2007
Why am i a freak? Freak of nature? Hell Yeah! grin I have no qualms with my exs. We all cool because am cool like that grin ignore the last part grin Even the ones in naija, we still talk on the phone, chat online, because we are friends first of all before all that crap and thankfully we are still friends even after all that.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by teeirl: 7:26am On Jul 02, 2007
It depends on how intense your relationship was wih him/her if you really loved him/her it will be hard to see them as just friends you will always want them on another level but if it was something that wasnt so serious of course you can be friends, why not?? smiley smiley
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by oshiokee(m): 7:48am On Jul 02, 2007
I don't think it's necessary. Besides she doesn't have a child for me so why should i mainatain contact. usually exes use it as a ploy to get back at you or come back to you.It's best left where the past belongs. Do you know the meaning of a "friend". if she was a friend then we wouldn't be exes. If say keep in touch or contact, that makes sense. If i have a GF that's a friend, then most likely would end as my wife
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by moondust(m): 2:08pm On Jul 02, 2007
I'm still friends with my exes, even them that choose not to remain friends with me
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by drrionelli(m): 2:25pm On Jul 02, 2007
Of course one can remain friends with one's exes!  Especially if you were together for any length of time--consider that you've developed shared interests and commonalities.  

Friendships and romantic relationships are two very different concepts.  However, they can seem to overlap with some people.  My take on it is that I never want to miss an opportunity to have a friend--and who better to have as a friend than somebody who already knows, and accepts, my weaknesses?!

I realize it's anecdotal, but my ex-girlfriend (nearly 4 years) and I are very good friends.  We sometimes get together for her sons' birthdays, holidays and just a bite to eat, every once in a while.  

So, if iice is a "freak" then I suppose that I, too, must be known as such!
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by iice(f): 2:37pm On Jul 02, 2007
drrionelli:

Friendships and romantic relationships are two very different concepts. However, they can seem to overlap with some people.

drrionelli:

who better to have as a friend than somebody who already knows, and accepts, my weaknesses?!

Well said!
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by viee(f): 2:48pm On Jul 02, 2007
remaining friends with ur ex depends on two very important factors

how the rlship ended
how matured both of u are

the second is the most important bc  some of us can be really swallow in our views
such pple are beta kept at an arms lenght

i love to make and keep friends but sometimes, it pays to keep away from some pple
even ex!
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by kilasos(f): 3:57pm On Jul 02, 2007
i am still friends with my ex,but i feel guilty when i talk to him sometimes,my current boyfriend does not like the idea.i hope to reduce communication when i get married.what do u think? wink
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by ThiefOfHearts(f): 3:59pm On Jul 02, 2007
Not really cept for one but that was a mutual breakup for unavoidable reasons. Other than that, no can do.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by OmoEko1(f): 3:59pm On Jul 02, 2007
yes oh why not wink wink wink, in fact my ex is my bestfriend kiss kiss kiss kiss
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by uchetobi(f): 5:05pm On Jul 03, 2007
it depends on the circumstance that led to the break up and also on if i have gotten over him
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by cuteass1(f): 5:45am On Jul 04, 2007
@ topic

I absolutely agree with uchetobi.

Some circumstances come into play . . but it takes two to tango  - - both parties got to want the friendship, or else it isnt one.

Atimes its easier said than done, if the break up was mutual, or friendly, then there are big chances of a great friendship, buit if it was a heavy one, one person isnt able to get over the hurt or both parties despise each other, then no, i don't think so.

Some end up being best of friends, some become casual "hello" freinds, but unfortunately some end up worst enemies!! cry

Its got everything to do with the individuals involved, circumstances around the break and mutual will for a friendship.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by OmoEko1(f): 6:00am On Jul 04, 2007
Hey sweetie kiss kiss how are u doing
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by denex: 6:08am On Jul 04, 2007
I am really not much interested in being friends with my exes. In fact, I do my very best to avoid them for at least the first year after the break-up.

Most times, I believe they've gone into the world and seen that there's actually none in the whole wide world better than me so they're basically wanting to get back together and that's not true friendship.

Well, I'm currently friends with one of my exes, I'm avoiding one right now (not picking her calls not going around her place and not replying her texts) but I'm hoping we can get back together sometime soon.

The rest, they're all my arch enemies. They broke up with me simply because I was too much of a nice guy. Well, now they know what the real world is like.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by Nobody: 8:58am On Jul 04, 2007
@ EVERYONE,

A famous romance expert once said and i qoute
"FRIENDSHIP CAN DEVELOP INTO LOVE, BUT LOVE INTO FRIENDSHIP, NEVER"

It's not that there wont be no talking, no exchange of pleasantries, but there'll always be a limit comapre to what you do with some other opposit sex which was never your EX but has been a friend. OK,
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by McDoe(m): 9:26am On Jul 04, 2007
viee:

remaining friends with your ex depends on two very important factors

how the rlship ended
how matured both of u are

the second is the most important bc  some of us can be really swallow in our views
such people are beta kept at an arms lenght

i love to make and keep friends but sometimes, it pays to keep away from some people
even ex!

I love to quote good contributions. The end of the relationship, to a large extent, determines ones position.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by jgirl3: 11:17am On Jul 04, 2007
Friends with exes? Why not?
It's just that there will have to be some kind of distance between myself and himself so that it wouldn't be a case of us falling back in love or becoming confused of where we stand.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by McDoe(m): 11:24am On Jul 04, 2007
j-girl, don't u think something solid could still emanate from such staying together? Afterall, there is this saying that 'once there, you can always be there again'. what is your view(s)
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by jgirl3: 11:55am On Jul 04, 2007
I'm not too sure about a second chance. But if there's someone else in either of our lives it's best to be distanced.
Though Something could emanate from a friendship with an ex but it is rare unless no one is sure of why they really broke up in the first place. That causes confusion and resurrection of feelings.
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by Mynd44: 3:56pm On Jun 04, 2011
After all the BS? Well the only reason we can be friends is so that i can get at her friends
Re: Can U Stay Friends With Ur Ex? by Omolola1(f): 4:06pm On Jun 04, 2011
Yep! no biggie

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