I'll accept both

This is a question of intent, circumstance and integrity.

A matter of integrity.

The worth of a gift is materialistic

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Oga, gift na gift, so far the one that loves me presented a gift too.

I dey craze? I will collect boat of them.

I dont consider anything my lover gives me as cheap, it doesn't matter what it is

virginprincess:
No matter how cheap the gift is, i will accept it wholehearted from my lover, before an admirer gives you something, know that he is after something, maybe dating or even your body, in this life nothing is free not even in free town.

Easier said than done.

Why would I accept gifts when I'm not a beggar? I would ask them if they did not see all the many needy people lining the roads waiting for money to eat? I only accept gifts from immediate family members.

And the only women I ever accept gifts from are my mother, sisters and wife, and even then only reluctantly. A gift from any woman is usually a loan on interest.

Godpikin4real:
An old friend of mine would tell me she doesn't reject gifts. Well, for me, if I like d admirer beta dan d lover boi, I'd simply accept.

Meaning you never really loved your guy in the first place.

asdfjklhaha:

Collectin gifts from admirers can ruin ur relationship, I remember sometime in 2018 I was still wit my ex, a guy in my church bought me a phone. I told him am in a relationship I cant accept it he said he is not interested in dating me that he doesnt like the phone am using, that I should accept it. I did an told my boyfriend then, he did not complain about it or ask me to return it, but that was the beginning of our break up, any little issue we hav he will say is because he doesn't have money to by me phone that's why I have started double dating. This is someone I told, I could easily have lied to him that an aunty or uncle bought it for me but I told him the truth, yet he started using it in every issue, after a while he told me to return the phone back to the guy, phone I hav used for more than 2 months, the problems was just too much I just had to personally end it so I can have peace of mind. But I learnt from it. Accepting gift from admirers can be risky cos it can ruin ur relationship especially if ur guy is the insecure type.

I just love what you typed here very risky to accept gift from an admirer when you are in a relationship, it will definitely ruin everything

asdfjklhaha:

Collectin gifts from admirers can ruin ur relationship, I remember sometime in 2018 I was still wit my ex, a guy in my church bought me a phone. I told him am in a relationship I cant accept it he said he is not interested in dating me that he doesnt like the phone am using, that I should accept it. I did an told my boyfriend then, he did not complain about it or ask me to return it, but that was the beginning of our break up, any little issue we hav he will say is because he doesn't have money to by me phone that's why I have started double dating. This is someone I told, I could easily have lied to him that an aunty or uncle bought it for me but I told him the truth, yet he started using it in every issue, after a while he told me to return the phone back to the guy, phone I hav used for more than 2 months, the problems was just too much I just had to personally end it so I can have peace of mind. But I learnt from it. Accepting gift from admirers can be risky cos it can ruin ur relationship especially if ur guy is the insecure type.

and after ending with ur bf did u start dating d guy that bought u d phone?

asdfjklhaha:

Many guys are like that especially the broke ones, you will say with them, encourage them, support them, even lend them money you don't have, yet that will never be happy for you when good things come your way, they want. They see suffering as a way of proving to them that you love them. Even hanging out with anyone becomes a problem, honestly dating toxic guys is terrible. You can run mad with stress. Thank God I'm free.

I BLAME YOU, you shouldn't be telling anyone when an admirer buys you a gift. Truth is no one gives you anything for free & you Women all know this, there are admirers that are super wealthy and a phone or a car may not mean much to them.

As a man, aside my birthday. I can’t remember the last time I got a gift, and it only comes whomever I’m dating. So I don’t even expect

Nazgul:
I just decided to ask this question...I've seen people gift their admirers, iPhones, cars, even cash gifts of up to 5m.

So would you as a girl or guy reject an expensive gift from an admirer for cheap gift from your lover that comes from his/her heart?

Please who are you addressing the question to. Is it Naija girls?

E shock me when one girl told me during youth service that she will leave me and enter motor should any car owner decide to stop over for her.

I was dazed considering I was having feelings for her.

virginprincess:
No matter how cheap the gift is, i will accept it wholehearted from my lover, before an admirer gives you something, know that he is after something, maybe dating or even your body, in this life nothing is free not even in free town.

Story

Yes and quite easily bt the lover has to be a tested and real one. Not the fakes running around everywhere.

Thinkherbell:
If i love a man, I wouldn't look at any rich person twice. No matter how rich the person is.

Easier said than done.

"Talk is cheap".

Oliver80:
As a man, aside my birthday. I can’t remember the last time I got a gift, and it only comes whomever I’m dating. So I don’t even expect

Even for my birthday self nothing for me. I don suffer

truthsayer009:


I BLAME YOU, you shouldn't be telling anyone when an admirer buys you a gift. Truth is no one gives you anything for free & you Women all know this, there are admirers that are super wealthy and a phone or a car may not mean much to them.

So all the ones you gave me were not free?

I am learning.

Magnoliaa:
Why is it an "either/or" situation? Will receiving a gift from an admirer make me think less of the person I'm with or what?

Worth doesn't matter as much as its intention from my lover... Same for an admirer - just a slight difference. If it's TOO expensive, then I'm not taking it. It'll leave me feeling indebted. If it's not and the admirer gave of their will (I don't care for whatever motive), I WON'T feel indebted or be tricked into feeling so. You gave me the gift, and I'm going use and enjoy it freely till its last.

I can't put myself in a place where I'll constantly have to be checking if I'm hurting people with what I do or say or receive or give and...

Also, gifts can sometimes be expressions of friendliness and appreciation, etc. I don't attached much negativity and distrust to it.

It's is funny when women buy gifts it's always something attached but they believe that a Man can be buying them tons of gift without anything attached.

I mean, an admirer wants to Fck you right? Unless you want to live in self denial.

Na so olosho work dey take start.

Coolbadguy:


I just love what you typed here very risky to accept gift from an admirer when you are in a relationship, it will definitely ruin everything

Do you know the worse thing about this discussion?

When you actually try to help another lady with no strings attached in front of your spouse, OMO war will start, that is when she will start reminding you of all the stuff you have not done.

Start asking you if you are dating the girl, but when the tables are turned, they collect gifts and all sorts saying he is just a friend LMAOOO.

virginprincess:
No matter how cheap the gift is, i will accept it wholehearted from my lover, before an admirer gives you something, know that he is after something, maybe dating or even your body, in this life nothing is free not even in free town.

U are good lady.

Keep it up...

pocohantas:


So all the ones you gave me were not free?

I am learning.

You bought me gifts right? Yes, so i reciprocated because I encourage giving. But generally we all know Men dont do things for free. Let's be honest.

Lie kee u there

felong:

It doesn't work that way o, some girls date guys just for what they can get from them. They have a real lover behind the scene.

Gbam

passionberry:


Gbam

So that's what you do?

yusluvad:
U are good lady.
Keep it up...

Thank you.

truthsayer009:


You bought me gifts right? Yes, so i reciprocated because I encourage giving. But generally we all know Men dont do things for free. Let's be honest.

They were not for free, leave story. I will be watching you with binoculars now.

Most people do not do things for free, not just men. Personally I will ask why you are being so nice/generous, make I know on time. I have met not more than 4 men that are altruistic.

felong:

Your boyfriend is very childish, that you are broke doesn't mean you should frown at your girlfriend when people try to show her care. Such guy will block your progress because of his selfish ego, it's a good thing you left him.

it's not always so, it depends on the person who brings d gift, accepting gifts from people of opposite gender especially when u know they could have ulterior motives keeps you indebted, at some point, u would wanna be mild on them should they make advances in a bid to reciprocate such gestures. It's normal for any African guy to feel insecure especially when broke cos girls have a way of rubbing it on you, next thing is she'd start comparing you with d benefactor.