FOR THE MEN: CAN YOU MARRY A GIRL THAT GOT PREGNANT DURING HER SECONDARY SCHOOL DAYS  OR WHO WAS INNOCENTLY RAPED AND COULD NOT GET A ABORTION? AND IT ACTUALLY TURNS OUT YOU ARE REALLY INLOVE WITH HER BECAUSE OF HER GENUINESS AND CHARACTER.

FOR THE LADIES: IF A GUY WHO ALREADY HAS A CHILD FROM HIS EX WIFE (DEAD OR ALIVE ) OR EX GIRLFRIEND,ASKED YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE WOULD YOU ACCEPT HIM AND THE CHILD WOULD HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU? OF COURSE HE MEETS YOUR DREAM AND REALLY LOVES YOU WITH ALL HIS HEART.

YOUR OPINION COUNTS.

Yes, I could marry a woman who'd had a child by another man, irrespective of how it was conceived.

That's a no-brainer for me. Sure, why not?

Veracious:

FOR THE MEN: CAN YOU MARRY A GIRL THAT GOT PREGNANT DURING HER SECONDARY SCHOOL DAYS  OR WHO WAS INNOCENTLY RAPED AND COULD NOT GET A ABORTION? AND IT ACTUALLY TURNS OUT YOU ARE REALLY INLOVE WITH HER BECAUSE OF HER GENUINESS AND CHARACTER.

FOR THE LADIES: IF A GUY WHO ALREADY HAS A CHILD FROM HIS EX WIFE (DEAD OR ALIVE ) OR EX GIRLFRIEND,ASKED YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE WOULD YOU ACCEPT HIM AND THE CHILD WOULD HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU? OF COURSE HE MEETS YOUR DREAM AND REALLY LOVES YOU WITH ALL HIS HEART.

YOUR OPINION COUNTS.

You again veracious,
to be honest with you, am going to jump at her, cos there's 100% likelihood of her getting pregnant when we're married.
Am not looking for those so-called virgins, ok you know what i mean.

there lot of things to consider before making such decisions. are you ready to cope with what comes after, especially when the child is older. what of if it happens to be a male child, and you also have a male child. are you ready to cope with the competition that might arise between these two male children. what of if this ex girl friend or wife pops up from space later, and manipulates her child to do things, because there is every high possibility. are you ready to cope with it?

i don't think so. a lot of things to consider before making this decision, you don't just look at it from the there and now glasses you also try to level it with future possibilities.

the problem is that when children are involved you have to love them and treat them as your own. Kids are not always sweet and innocent and may cause trouble in your relationship. If the child does not like you then ur relationship is doomed.

For me the answer is NO
but i never know wat can happen, the love of my life could have 4 kids

yep, but bear in mind that he might place his kids before you and they will be a pain in the neck for a loooooooooong time. i wouldn't like to be in those shoes. i'm better off with a man who hasn't got this extra baggage coc i don't think i'll have the patience to deal with his bratty kids.

I probably would be partial on this topic cause i have a child but in all fairness like its been said, there are loads of factors to consider.

It totally depends on the age of the kid (s) and how many kids they are and how many mothers, if more than one, then i would really doubt it.

Of course I could if I love the man. I have a child from a previous relationship & my boyfriend has a child from a previous relationship. Already his ex is trying to cause trouble but I'm not giving in to her. My boyfriend & I have spoken about marriage so I can't see the problem. It also depends on how you bring up your children, whether they have respect or not.

no

KAPITAL NO FOR ME TO MARRY SUCH A BABE AS MY FIRST WIFE. IF NA WIFEY NO 2 EHENNN

I'd marry a man who already has a child, child or no child it makes no difference it's love that counts. Even if de pikin na real brat.

Yes, it depend if I love her.

@ Topic

I can't.

I don't think i can marry such a girl.
Let's forget about the rape stuff, lets say she got pregnant as a result of her recklessness.

It's not possible because.

1. No parent or family would be willing to accept a bastard into the family

2. You won't want any one's child to deprive your blood children off their right.

3. The father father of the child might run into your wife one day. and of course he would ask for his child. And before you know it, she would be having a affair at your back.

4. You can never love that child as much as you love your children.

CrazyKid tell them jare, in fact you should extend your list.
Topic, I don't want to.

@crazykid:
I suppose that the listing you posted is based on the cultural considerations of where you live. I certainly respect that such would be the case.

Please, if you wouldn't mind, provide a bit of further explanation for each (especially in #4, the "father father of the child".

Of course it's based on his cultural considerations, probably as a Nigerian man. Not that some Nigerian men don't marry women that have already given birth.

By father father, he means the biological father of the child(ren).

HELLSS NAY!! Not even juju can make me do it.

Y'all is just trippin. I believe Thoniaslim said it right. There will always be competition, there is also the chance that the kid might not accept you, the presence of the child also establishes an invincible barrier in that relationship. There are alot of complications involved. Such kids tend to be very hostile towards whoever the intruder is. If you happen to be in 9ja, then that is just plain yawa. Nothing you do for that child will ever be right. You will always hears words like "you did so so and so to me because I'm not your child".

I'd rather adopt a kid with my wife than marry a woman who already has a child. Think about it.

I can get married 2a guy who has a child,but as long as the mother of the child doesnt use dat as an excuse 2get back in2 hs life.i love children and i sure would make a gud mother.as yoruba would say "omo bibi ko kii n se aarun" dat is child bearing isnt a disease

I can get married 2a guy who has a child,but as long as the mother of the child doesnt use dat as an excuse 2get back in2 hs life.i love children and i sure would make a gud mother.as yoruba would say "omo bibi ko kii n se aarun" dat is child bearing isnt a disease

I will not,I repeat not marry a woman who already has a kid!I,ve got myriads of reasons for that bt most importantly,I cant cope with the thought.My imaginations will always run wild! :oI will find it difficult to love her.

Shallow thinkers we've got in here. Has anyone thought of the young widows and widowers, It could sure happen to anyone. So for those that said no they can't marry someone who already has a child, have u ever thought of u dying young (i'm not praying 4 that) and leaving ur spouse with a young child to take care of, are u saying ur spouse and child do not have the right to be happy again? Thats really unfair,

@ dany25

Well said!!! I have a child from a previous relationship & the guy left me just before I gave birth. That wasn't my choice so don't I deserve to be happy with someone else? I'm just glad I've found someone wonderful

If the child isn't beautiful why not?

On a serious note, I can marry someone whose got a kid already. In as much as I am sure of the person's real intentions for me. And the child's dad would resurface back in her life.

Sillyboy and Eiregirl .U guys are entitled to ur opinions.Y wont Eiregirl support u when she,s got a kid out of wedlock.One mans shakara is anodas akara.I will not marry a widower nor any woman who 4 any reason had an out of wedlock kid,period!

@Topic
I can, but I won't

@ karl ken

It is so easy for men to leave a relationship even after producing a child, whether married or not! I'd rather not be with a man so small minded anyway!!! Do you know how difficult it is raising a child alone You have no idea. I'm so proud of myself and all of the other single parents, men & women who are raising their kids alone, due to circumstances beyond their control!

dany25:

Shallow thinkers we've got in here. Has anyone thought of the young widows and widowers, It could sure happen to anyone. So for those that said no they can't marry someone who already has a child, have u ever thought of u dying young (i'm not praying 4 that) and leaving your spouse with a young child to take care of, are u saying your spouse and child do not have the right to be happy again? Thats really unfair,

Thank you for your wonderfull opinion.

We are all matured enough to make decisions.but i would really love it if some of us think of it deeply cos anyone of us could be a victim and still needs to be happily married in life by the one he/she loves and not out of pity.

Personally i can get married to a man who already has a child,not out of pity but true love for him.
it does'nt matter to me if the child or children are really pain in my neck becos for you to really find true love there must be something  to pay for you to get it.and these might just be one of it.

Am sure some of you who said NO can be madly inlove with a single parent tomorrow that you just can't let go.

DON'T YOU THINK?

timmy7:

@Topic
I can, but I won't

could you pls tell me why you won't

drrionelli:

@crazykid:
I suppose that the listing you posted is based on the cultural considerations of where you live. I certainly respect that such would be the case.

Please, if you wouldn't mind, provide a bit of further explanation for each (especially in #4, the "father father of the child".

Yes in #4 what i said was that you can't love that child as much as you love your children.

Take example it's the man who has the child and he gets married to the woman, do you think that woman would give that child the same amount of love she gives to her own children?
haven't you heard of cases where step-mothers maltreated children so badly that they had to run away from their homes? Most of them end up being robbers, truck-pushers, e.t.c.

So then, if i meet a girl, and she tells me she's pregnant, she should be able to stick to the father of the child because that's the only place she might be able to experience love.
Afterall, she wasn't raped. She willing gave herself for the man.
So i see no reason why i should come in between them and take another man's responsibility all in the name of love.
True love doesn't work that way.