BoosBae:
I tire o, a man that will be putting his eyes in the small money you're making... Is that one a real man? He's just a selfish being.

He's looking for one woman to support her to grow, a woman that has a lot of loads on head already. He didn't think very well before he say I do

BoosBae:
I tire o, a man that will be putting his eyes in the small money you're making... Is that one a real man? He's just a selfish being.

He's looking for one woman to support her to grow, a woman that has a lot of loads on head already. He didn't think very well before he say I do

Please, don't blame them. Don't see it as cheating or laziness to struggle and feed themselves. As long as they are not asking you for money but just what to eat, have mercy on them. God knows the reason why he allowed the marriage to happen in the first place.

You might be their last hope, reason why they keep coming to you. Instead pursuing them, pray to God to always bless your struggle so that you will always have what to give them.

It is really difficult for people to feed these days in Nigeria. So if you have the one you eat, talk more of giving others, then you should be proud of your self and be grateful to God for making it possible for you to fend for yourself and others around you.

Use it as a prayer point, to be the reason why God should bless you more. See now, you are talking of making money to buy car and live large. But they are people who are even begging God to just provide for them what they will eat in a day. They don't know that there is something called car that human being supposed to have.

Am not saying that for you to buy car is being selfish, but don't see it as because they always come to eat in your house, that why you have not been able to buy care or build a house. There is hunger in the country. Be happy that other people are looking up to you, you are their hope for now. I am sure that there will be a reword for you from God.

Don't change your character to them, and don't let it bring quarrel between you and your wife. Am just feeling for the family. May God help you and your in-law family. Thank you.

It shall be well with you!

okoroemeka:
poverty is too bad,it will make you behave abnormal and think weird things,what better joy will a man have if his in-laws come to his place and he will feed them very well and even given them transport money when going,when my in-laws use to come to my house I usually prepare nsala soup myself for them with catfish and oldlayers,poverty it shall not be well with you.

The man is not complaining about his in-laws visits. All he's saying is that the visitations are too often (and they come in battalions) with hungry stomachs always, they devour anything devourable.
I don't think there's anyone who will not complain about it, directly or indirectly.
Besides, too much of everything they say is not good.
And if I may ask; how often do ur own in-laws visit you?

Bola146:
I understand your worries. Sir, I know that you knew or saw this coming( that is why it's good to stop what you can't continue) they are her relations, they are her cross, she can't ignore them away. It's now left for you to sit your wife down maybe to minimize their coming or solutions to it. You can still be helping with the little you have, it's better than to ignore them totally.

Matured advice!

Not some people who never know anything in life, trying to make the op hate the family he married from.

I think the best way to go about it is giving them attitude and body language, I wouldn't say it to their faces not to come to your house if I were you, I would just give them attitude towards their eating habit when they visit you, but be smart about it.

And you think that will be very helpful?
It will make them hate him, because they will not know where he is coming from. And once they hate him, they will be problem between him and his wife.


Instead, he should talk to them directly how things has become so hard for him that they hardly eat twice in a day. If they have matured mind, they will understand. Instead of changing character and giving them bod language with angry facial expression.

Why don't you send so e of your own money to help the husband? As you say, givers never lack.

So, some of you think he should not progress himself but instead be the benefactor of feckless people? Just because God will give him something in return? SMH!

Without growth and improvement, he will not be in a position to continue to feed his in-laws and his own...

They agreed not to have family visitors (this is a young marriage anyways) and the man's family does not come.

Feeding extra mouths will cost thousands a month - that is money he should not be spending.

Quid quo Pro - marriage is not a charity!

Xenry:
This is what happens when you marry from a poor family, you will automatically become a burden bearer for all.

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Tell your wife to feed her family, while you feed yours! Imagine feeding a family of 11 just because you are married to One—that's unfair na!

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Try and relocate if you can. Because with the way they use to feast on your food, they might as well feast on your flesh when the food is no more .

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But they eat too much ooo! Damn!

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I tell you bro, Redpill no fit handle this problem ooo. So you need to Japa!

Enemy of peace and love! If is you, will you do just as you advice on him?

Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

Most hilarious story I have read on this platform

Slynation:
That's one problem in marriages.... especially when you marry from any family and it happens to be their eldest daughter, you automatically turns father Christmas in some cases....There is absolutely nothing you can do that will make her to chase away her own siblings, and ending the marriage because of such attitude is bullshit to me.... Discuss things with your wife, I'm sure she would proffer solutions to this situation

Normally, food is something you should enjoy watching others eating with happiness...

Exactly!

Xenry:
He better take it, because those guys may end up eating the OP himself one day . They eat too much abeg.
Like play like play, they go just chop the OP like that, e no good na .

U almost killed me with laughter ���

Ninobraw
I will say to you that women are very selfish creation. They will not tolerate a single person in their husband family but when it comes to their own, no pros.

I wanted to open a thread like this to bash out women but I held back because I see that many naitaland women will hate me too much.

Your story is the reason why marrying an
Ijaw woman is no no go area. I have seen urhobo men who marry an ijaw women, they never enjoy their life anymore because they marry the full family

Ijaws families are guilty of this

Yet our society will start gossiping if a man of 30years is not married... Forgetting a lot need to be but into consideration. So many have put themselves into a hell of trouble because of marriage. One of my paternal uncle died last month May because of this marriage of a thing.

Poverty is a bastard. You are shouting because of food. Kai!!! Anyway, I lack what to tell you. So, if it were your family will you stop them from coming to your house because of food? To even think that your wife contributes to the feeding from her personal income amazes me. You are very stingy, that's the blunt truth .

Funkybabee:



He's looking for one woman to support her to grow, a woman that has a lot of loads on head already. He didn't think very well before he say I do

Hmmm !

Help them in whatever way you can without hurting yourself too much. See it as a sacrifice. Your wife won't be happy knowing her siblings her hungry.

Those hungry children you are looking at today could become something in future and will grow to remember how uncle didn't mind feeding them when they were hungry.

sam2dok2020:
This people u see as poor today can be very rich tomorrow that u may need there help also, Life is funny.
Feed the poor and be happy about it.

That is what they don't understand

One of my boss friend had this same scenario

The woman came from a poor home and married a working class man

Infact they were orphans
The woman was the first daughter

The husband said he doesn't want her family to be coming around

It later caused problem between them
They had two boys
The man was maltreating the wife

She later struggled and got civil service Job

The marriage later broke down

Fast forward to today

That woman later rose up to be a director in the federal civil service

The woman siblings later got well one relocated to the US and later helped others to move over

Today they are all successful and well established

They even helped there sister's son come over to the US
Today he is a medical doctor in the US

The second son works with a multinational here in Nigeria

It was during the wedding of the second son the miserable man showed up
Looking very wretched
Even the woman sibblinngs in the US all came from for the wedding
He couldn't even face them

These were orphans he rejected when they were nothing


Many look at life from the present
They judge everything from the now
Not knowing that the people you look down on today will be great tomorrow

akpunda86:


Bros I feel u. Really feel u. I hope ur wife no be from mbaise. They behave like hausa people. Boy earlier you spark better for u.
Your experience just like mine. I regretted paying for a 2 bedroom apartment. My family nvr and uptill now never come they come and greet and go that's how we grew up but my wife family a pain in my neck worst no dey work sisters go come Lagos carry friends my house became a base for mbaise ppl.
Everyday na cook some go come stay months.

Well my rent expired I took a smaller house just a room and palor I don't need Xtra room cos my firm gave me an apartment I hardly use still no stop .
.I stopped buying food in bulk all exhausted not even nepa token. A whole complete year my wife almost starved I don't give a damn but baby food and others was never issue cos she taught I buy on credit a supermarket gives any baby stuff only she needs.
She started hiding cooked food. She cried and cried and said I'm maltreating her I told her na she dey do me. Like she sent d message they all disappeared.
Urs better wife working cos mine doing noting but once people cum my freezer goes down.

Sorry to say for me mbaise ppl just dey do like hausa ppl

Boy, try to punctuate. It won't kill you. Reading your stupid write-up looks like walking through a jungle. GOSH!

Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

Simply relocate.

I am telling you

Sugar97:

Lmao. This is the funniest response on this thread so far

We understand the economic situation in the country, but people should have conscience nah. That man should be generous doesn't mean he should die trying to please his in-laws that are not ready to help themselves. If they were 9 and the guy married one, why won't the ones that are grown engage in one or two things in order to assist themselves and their family. I have been in his shoes sometime ago even as an unmarried man. But mine was my cousins coming to depend on me up to 2 years and it was so burdensome on me, thanks to my landlord then who assisted me in giving everyone quit notice including myself and we all found our ways. I advise the Op to call his wife and reason with her over it, he can also call the elder ones and give them some advice on how to stand independently with that, I believe they will start reasoning on their own.

fannybaby:
. Your own mother's call is disturbing him

I have had stomach ulcer way before I got married last year. She is fond of calling to remind me to eat even now that i’m married, imagine someone eavesdropping on her call, they will think my husband is starving me of food. It’s embarrassing

fannybaby:
. Your own mother's call is disturbing him

I have had stomach ulcer way before I got married last year. She is fond of calling to remind me to eat even now that i’m married, imagine someone eavesdropping on her call, they will think my husband is starving me of food. It’s embarrassing .

MrObontami:


Boy, try to punctuate. It won't kill you. Reading your stupid write-up looks like walking through a jungle. GOSH!

Gosh. He said I'm Gosh

CSTRR:
I know a few women that have carried their husbands to Canada permanently on the back of their certificates and training.

That is what we call WIFE.

No be just to fucckkk and born.

if the sex is great and the soil is fertile, I don't mind

Benzemma:
Please, don't blame them. Don't see it as cheating or laziness to struggle and feed themselves. As long as they are not asking you for money but just what to eat, have mercy on them. God knows the reason why he allowed the marriage to happen in the first place.

You might be their last hope, reason why they keep coming to you. Instead pursuing them, pray to God to always bless your struggle so that you will always have what to give them.

It is really difficult for people to feed these days in Nigeria. So if you have the one you eat, talk more of giving others, then you should be proud of your self and be grateful to God for making it possible for you to fend for yourself and others around you.

Use it as a prayer point, to be the reason why God should bless you more. See now, you are talking of making money to buy car and live large. But they are people who are even begging God to just provide for them what they will eat in a day. They don't know that there is something called car that human being supposed to have.

Am not saying that for you to buy car is being selfish, but don't see it as because they always come to eat in your house, that why you have not been able to buy care or build a house. There is hunger in the country. Be happy that other people are looking up to you, you are their hope for now. I am sure that there will be a reword for you from God.

Don't change your character to them, and don't let it bring quarrel between you and your wife. Am just feeling for the family. May God help you and your in-law family. Thank you.

You have sense. God bless you biko. Na man you be. That's if you're a man oh, lol
It's always a privilege to help people. Nobody knows tomorrow.

Mecka:
if the sex is great and the soil is fertile, I don't mind

That is you.

Other men have higher ambitions.

Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

This is a very sensitive issue, I will advice you to be very patient with them. Things cannot continue like that, one day they will stop coming or reduce the frequency drastically. If you are fed up, then I will advice you reduce the quantity and quality of foodstuff you stock in your house so that you can save and whenever they are not around you can eat some quality food or you can always eat quality stuffs outside when ever you feel like.

See your head....you don't know that once you are married to your girl,all her problem becomes yours and your problem becomes hers. If to say na them girl family de feed you....will you come out here to talk trash..my friend use your ATM withdraw money and make everyone happy. See you wey de chop like whale de say someone de chop like elephant.

GGirll:


You are the funniest of all responses I read here....same happened to my sis who just put to bed, in laws comprising of one old woman they hired, 2 old ladies ages 29 n 39, stormed her house in d name of helping out, they cook, give her little n eat up d rest until her hubby started complaining that how come stuffs are finishing like these, she started cooking herself to control things n dishing their food only for d 39 year old one to complain that shes stingy n that where she was squatting, d woman gives her plenty food, her Hubby's elder sis of about 45 years too comes n enters d kitchen to pack food for herself, each of these ladies are divorcees n unmarried with annoying character flaws n very rude while uneducated. But my sis is a doctorate student while hubby is a business man, n all they do is go to marker, cook, steal, cause trouble between her n hubby, clean d house twice a week, d mama only baths d baby n press her tommy, while my sis washes her n Hubby's clothes, baby's clothes, cooks, breast feeds n cuddles d baby even at night n one day she just woke up n ordered her hubby to choose between her n them,she practically told them off today they have their peace.

In life, don't please others at your own detriment. Always please yourself.
If you satisfy others and things go wrong, they will blame you, forgetting your sacrifices. But if you satisfy yourself, even if things go wrong and people blame you, you will be happy that you didn't suffer yourself for those blaming you.

Wahala for who no get indomie for house to chop