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Tired Of My Marriage - Family (16) - Nairaland

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Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. / My Marriage Is At The Brink Of Collapse Help Me / My Marriage Has Finally Ended (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Tired Of My Marriage by jaxxy(m): 8:13am On Jun 14, 2021
Tell ur wife to explain to her siblings ure challenges do it's not like u hate them or anything bt u can't do more than is comfortable for u to do.

Budget with her what u can afford to entertain family guests monthly after that let any family members who chooses to visit hold themselves.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Daddymiracle: 8:17am On Jun 14, 2021
Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.


brother if you believe in yourself and you’re a Man. Just don’t be tired or weak don’t let that bother you and keep your head straight and find something that will be making you happy in your marriage. Put the devil into shame be strong and don’t stop blessing other with Little you have, because God sees your heart and how you’v been feeding dis poor family and Almighty will be your Guarantor. Just be strong �

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by SweetyZinta(f): 8:19am On Jun 14, 2021
Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.

I feel your pain, try to change address and warn your wife of the implications of giving them your new address. If she gives them, you can leave the marriage.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Thelma104(f): 8:23am On Jun 14, 2021
Ninobraw relocate my dear brother, if you continue this way you will remain poor and this will extend to your children, be wise and relocate.post=102651450:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by seunny4lif(m): 8:23am On Jun 14, 2021
Gbam, since they dey feed themselves before he married their daughter why are they packing the food stuffs he provided for his immediate family?
kogi2010:

oa before u marry dere daughter were u d one feeding them? no so how do u know he can't feed them? One thing u must understand u can't stop them from visiting dere sister except u want to walk out of the marriage. I remember u mentioned ur wife using her own money to buy food too try n b a good man with good heart is just a matter of time ok dey will soon marry n u will be free for now feed them n more blessing awaits u
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Dominino: 8:26am On Jun 14, 2021
Stop runing from the role you bargained for; start mentoring each of them, get them to be independent. You can make them your weapon, stop seeing them as liabilities. Any of them that don't want to hid to your advice will most likely stop coming to your house.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Thelma104(f): 8:27am On Jun 14, 2021
Yes oo relocate (quote author=neonly post=102655646]So many comments from un expirence folks
The dust person to comment said it all relocate
Distance yurself
Tell yur wife you don't like them around too much yur wife will get d message across if not start behaving like a mad man strong face for them when they are around etc
Good luck[/quote]
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Funkybabee(f): 8:27am On Jun 14, 2021
When we are saying poverty is a bastard, u guys will be saying na gold digger, na gold digger.


See how this one is shouting uptop of feeding your wife siblings, how many are they self, how many.. I swear you can't be my husband and challenge me with this I swear the response u will receive from me will makes u hate me totally.


What arrant nonsense, u can't even dream of having an NGO talk more of helping less privilege people around you.

What such of useless agreement you want her to sent her own siblings away or to be starving them because u cannot carry the bills only.

You knew before that she's the first born of the family which means she has a lots of responsibility to carried so what about the fuss now, rubbish

If you don't want to be leaving money for house expenses ni, u should stop, God that's in the kitchen have not left there to cruise.

Biko shifts God will surely support the poor woman

Iru yin po ni Nairaland and we know u very well, it's just so sad for the woman to marry such type.

Rubbish, no body should quote please I'm not feeling fine this morning, u can just chop insults with it.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Nobody: 8:27am On Jun 14, 2021
mokay:
I learnt on this platform that family problem no dey finish. We have very similar issue, but I have conquered what you just claimed to be an issue. I want you to know that your wife loves you, and you should try to understand that. Here is what I did.
1. I called her and explained how this is hurting me in all ramifications, plus the fact that my own family does not do that even though they have every right like hers. I told her talk to her people, cos if I do, it might escalate into something else, and my own family will support me in this.
2. We agreed to buy a landed property, there we pool our resources. If I am trying to do pass myself, she will be the one to remind me of our target.
I believe this should give you peace. Please don't use strong face as others might have advised you, those gluttons today could feed millions tomorrow. Only God knows tomorrow. Peace.
best advice ever.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by NobleAngell(f): 8:28am On Jun 14, 2021
RPG2020:
Just because of food my guy don carry he family matter come niaraland if the woman cheat on you na BBC go carry am
I dey tell you.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by AmazingELixir: 8:30am On Jun 14, 2021
This is why a white man's life style will ever appeal to me...everything they do is based on planning from the number of invites to their wedding ceremonies and occasions to the number of persons in their houses and homes are planned and budgeted for..

Even some of them bill their grownup children still staying in their houses for rentage and utilities

Most of you saying Op is stingy and blessings from above bequeathed to people for feeding those in need....you'll should know Op is no philanthropist...the youngman is struggling to eke out a living for himself and small family.

It is only an ignorant person that doesn't know things are tough for most Nigerians, sustaining oneself is a huge undertaking in the present day Nigeria, carrying some other persons burden is a whole new challenge.

Op please have a talk with your wife on the issue...though I'm very sure she is aware of the situation and how its affecting you as a person and the resources available at home...her unique position as the first daughter of her family puts her in a precarious position as she can't afford to chase away her siblings knowing fully well how tough things are back home. Please don't take out your frustration oh your wife by questioning your marriage she's also a victim.

I think you should discuss with madam on the possibility of sending monthly stipends to your inlaws as a means of mitigating the situation.


Wish you the best.

where the young man is dying slowly one can only say a bunch of you are just plain his inlaws making live unbearable for him

1 Like

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Nobody: 8:30am On Jun 14, 2021
okoroemeka:
that's a very wrong move,that your cousin will not forget that statement till his or her dieing days,it is better for him to come whatever is available will be managed,I had such experience when my two cousins were living for a brief period with me in enugu,my wife grew tired and told me she will stop feeding them I said NO,we shall manage,but now one of those my cousins got married to a very very wealthy Tyre importer in onitsha and the other is now working in a big oil company ,till date the reverence and respect they have for me and my wife is limitlessness, little do they know what really happened behind the scene.
onye maechi?
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Jonemenike2000(m): 8:30am On Jun 14, 2021
Bro, you have passed your message and they must have heard you. Maybe, you will see less of them.
Unless they are a bunch of fools that none amongst them uses the social media.

My 1 cent of advice
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by tunary(m): 8:33am On Jun 14, 2021
Slimdan360:
Stop being a selfish and stingy person,the more u give,the greater u receive,know this and know peace
oya send me some money I am broke pls
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by NobleAngell(f): 8:33am On Jun 14, 2021
MrMcJay:
Very simple solution.

1 Go to Oyingbo market and buy a big bag of unpeeled Egusi.

2 When next they come to your house, put off the TV, say something like 'Aunty Chizoba and Uncle Pius, when you finish eating, help me peel small egusi".

3 Use paint rubber and pack a heavy heap of egusi in front of them let them peel.

Sit back, relax and see what God will do.
LMAO. Best comment here so far.
But why did you pick the names "Chizoba"and "Pius"? Lol
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Wetlink: 8:40am On Jun 14, 2021
Op, from your rants and complaints, anyone can tell you are a very selfish and stingy person.
You said even if you say you no get money, your wife go use her money just make e be say her family chop and you have a problem with that too cry just wow!

You would rather she gives you the money to save and build house than use it to feed/support her own family. This one is beyond poverty, You are a very wicked fellow please.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by seanwilliam(m): 8:41am On Jun 14, 2021
GlobalWay:
One of the few sensible posts here. Op is a senseless myopic shallow-minded selfish bastard! What if he was the one born into his wife's family?! Did he choose to be born into his family of 3? Giver's hand always on Top, not op.
kindly shut up..

A man that have 9 children and can’t take care of them is so stûpid and fôolish!.. if the father of op’s wife had given birth to what he can take care of, they would not have turned liability to the op. I’m very sure you’re not a responsible man ! . Do u even know what it means to be feeding 11 people And not even once , constantly feeding them ?? If you do then you’re a very wicked human being!


Normal normal ops doesn’t owe anyone anything apart From his immediate family ! He can only be of help if he wants. He should not be compelled! In this hardship where minimum is less down 100$ and yet you expecting one person to shoulder a dozen responsibilities??

Givers Hand always on top kill u there

4 Likes

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Nobody: 8:43am On Jun 14, 2021
Xenry:
Poverty catch fire!
Poverty is a sin abeg.sad
I swear, poverty isn't just a sin but also a disease.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Finest6: 8:46am On Jun 14, 2021
This is really pathetic bro. But you should have considered this before getting married at least you saw their family size(children) and you know quit well that aren't boyant and you got married to their first born. It's expected if you ask me but you can adjust by discussing with your wife.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by seanwilliam(m): 8:47am On Jun 14, 2021
Funkybabee:
When we are saying poverty is a bastard, u guys will be saying na gold digger, na gold digger.


See how this one is shouting uptop of feeding your wife siblings, how many are they self, how many.. I swear you can't be my husband and challenge me with this I swear the response u will receive from me will makes u hate me totally.


What arrant nonsense, u can't even dream of having an NGO talk more of helping less privilege people around you.

What such of useless agreement you want her to sent her own siblings away or to be starving them because u cannot carry the bills only.

You knew before that she's the first born of the family which means she has a lots of responsibility to carried so what about the fuss now, rubbish

If you don't want to be leaving money for house expenses ni, u should stop, God that's in the kitchen have not left there to cruise.

Biko shifts God will surely support the poor woman

Iru yin po ni Nairaland and we know u very well, it's just so sad for the woman to marry such type.

Rubbish, no body should quote please I'm not feeling fine this morning, u can just chop insults with it.





How many people can you feed with the nonsense chinchin, snacks and catering for events and second hand Uk babies clothes wey u Dey pack and sell ??

See dumb and stupid mentality . So because your husband marries you now , he should be responsibility to the need of your family ??
How many people have you fed in your life before ? I’m sure none!

Easier said than done.. radarada
If you have ever worked hard for money before , you won’t be saying this nonsensical nonsense wey u Dey talk ..

Can your chin chin money feed only you ?? Arrant rubbish !!

5 Likes

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by VirusOO7(m): 8:47am On Jun 14, 2021
This Buhari time... I go lock my door. No to family ties
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Sleekfingers: 8:48am On Jun 14, 2021
Ninobraw:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid.

The problem I have is that, the girl's family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eyes to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when I noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money. Although my wife is very nice she earns salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money.

Before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it is making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys are number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.

Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way.

Before our marriage, we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us, the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it's a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have been able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do.


this your english get double K legs oooooo
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by dontbothermuch: 8:50am On Jun 14, 2021
Relocate to somewhere far, but not too far from your place of work. Tell your wife to tell no one.
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by uthlaw: 8:56am On Jun 14, 2021
Bola146:
I understand your worries. Sir, I know that you knew or saw this coming( that is why it's good to stop what you can't continue) they are her relations, they are her cross, she can't ignore them away. It's now left for you to sit your wife down maybe to minimize their coming or solutions to it. You can still be helping with the little you have, it's better than to ignore them totally.
why will he help a little,is he working for them....he should tell them to stop coming to his house,na by force!
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Atticusxsz(m): 8:59am On Jun 14, 2021
[quote author=Kylekent59 post=102694502]The best advise is for you to have a conversation with your wife. Tell her that you ain't comfortable with her siblings coming to feed their bellies in your house.

Be specific and talk with boldness.



A man should face his problems and tackle it, not run away from it.

If you relocate, one of them might come to stay permanently in your house
grin
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by BoosBae(f): 8:59am On Jun 14, 2021
seunny4lif:
Gbam, since they dey feed themselves before he married their daughter why are they packing the food stuffs he provided for his immediate family?
Didn't you read where the Op said his wife earns, so she funds and cooks with her money too? She was probably doing it when she was still in her parents house, before marrying this poor man...
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Atticusxsz(m): 9:00am On Jun 14, 2021
[quote author=Kylekent59 post=102694502]The best advise is for you to have a conversation with your wife. Tell her that you ain't comfortable with her siblings coming to feed their bellies in your house.

Be specific and talk with boldness.



A man should face his problems and tackle it, not run away from it.

If you relocate, one of them might come to stay permanently in your house
No be Juju be that?grin
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Bola146(f): 9:00am On Jun 14, 2021
adedehinbo:
left to me! Whenever they come around,I will just disappear from the house till they go

Will the foods at home follow you? How many times will you do this? That is why he should have known better before getting married to her
Re: Tired Of My Marriage by bnsheikh(m): 9:03am On Jun 14, 2021
I married the last born and still face the similar challenge.

1 Like

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Atticusxsz(m): 9:03am On Jun 14, 2021
WINDSOW:
From your statement, you LL be fuckiingly stingy that air cannot breath through your ✊. Imagine, your last sentence...


My ribs o! grin

1 Like

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by BoosBae(f): 9:05am On Jun 14, 2021
seanwilliam:






How many people can you feed with the nonsense chinchin, snacks and catering for events and second hand Uk babies clothes wey u Dey pack and sell ??

See dumb and stupid mentality . So because your husband marries you now , he should be responsibility to the need of your family ??
How many people have you fed in your life before ? I’m sure none!

Easier said than done.. radarada
If you have ever worked hard for money before , you won’t be saying this nonsensical nonsense wey u Dey talk ..

Can your chin chin money feed only you ?? Arrant rubbish !!
I don't even understand you people, the Op's wife funds and cooks with her money many times too. She was probably doing that before getting married, so she should forget her family because she married a poor man?

3 Likes

Re: Tired Of My Marriage by Funkybabee(f): 9:06am On Jun 14, 2021
seanwilliam:






How many people can you feed with the nonsense chinchin, snacks and catering for events and second hand Uk babies clothes wey u Dey pack and sell ??

See dumb and stupid mentality . So because your husband marries you now , he should be responsibility to the need of your family ??
How many people have you fed in your life before ? I’m sure none!

Easier said than done.. radarada
If you have ever worked hard for money before , you won’t be saying this nonsensical nonsense wey u Dey talk ..

Can your chin chin money feed only you ?? Arrant rubbish !!


Chaiii, see this confused gifts card seller

Omo you burst me into laugh this morning

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