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Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by esthel(f): 12:04pm On Aug 05, 2021
Most times people get help from outsiders than from family members, she needs to step out of that zone and get help elsewhere.

10 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by phenomental40(m): 12:05pm On Aug 05, 2021
Coz they dont care

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Mustiboy(m): 12:05pm On Aug 05, 2021
The problem with you people is the entitlement mentality you have, expecting everyone to ask after you all the time and render help.

I can't remember the last time any of my family or relatives called to ask about my wellbeing, but I don't get angry over it or blame anyone. They all are hustling and have their own hurdles to face.

The question we should ask ourselves before judging anyone is, "When last have I myself checked on anyone or even rendered any help to them?"

I'm in my early twenties, and, as young as I am, I render help every now and then to my cousins who call almost everytime to breath down on my neck. What about helping friends and strangers?
I've done so many that I can't even remember.

I don't help because I might get a return help in the future if their lives get better; nah, my own life will surely get better too. I help because it's the right thing to do and when I'm comfortable doing so.

Many of you expecting people to help you don't joke with your #50. Many people are that stingy.

My point is, nobody owes you all the bullshit y'all clamour for.

Yes, I know family are supposed to help and love truly, but if you see anyone amongst them who's well-to-do and doesn't help regardless, forget their ass and move on with your life.

Not everyone has a good heart, and you need to understand this.

There are good and bad family members and friends.

It's that simple.

26 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by tunary(m): 12:06pm On Aug 05, 2021
Hmmm
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by kirn(m): 12:06pm On Aug 05, 2021
K o
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Melvis100(m): 12:07pm On Aug 05, 2021
Honestly... E no easy for everybody... Or u ain't in their good book.. Nobody totally wicked
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Yamprince(m): 12:07pm On Aug 05, 2021
Your family members do not owe you, we need to stop this feeling of entitlement. Any help your family member extends to you is just a privilege and not your right. Please go and hustle and stop waiting on man.

17 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by seyz91(m): 12:08pm On Aug 05, 2021
Confirm!
Pweetiedude:
A Yoruba adage says 'ajumobi o kan taanu' meaning being related to rich or wealthy fellow doesn't mean the person is going to help you. Keep striving hard, May Almighty Allah crown your efforts.
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Nobody: 12:08pm On Aug 05, 2021
You can't help everyone na
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by seyz91(m): 12:08pm On Aug 05, 2021
True
sunshineV:
they actually don't care. it's not an act
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Komu1048(m): 12:09pm On Aug 05, 2021
Shayron:
I have been on this forum for quite sometime, I have been a guest all this while but my friend is in desperate need of help so I figure out it would be better if I seek you guys opinion.

I have a friend who's uncle is a well to do man works in a big organization and can use is influence to secure jobs or loans for my freind.

My freind has been at his Mercy for quite some time now, she is very hard-working though but she has witnessed the man help those who ain't even family members secure jobs in great places.

This is someone she calls family and uncle. This is not the first time of seeing this, I have seen this quite a lot it's very common amongst our people here in the southwest.

My question is why do family members turn your backs on you even though they have the power to help you out of your current situation. Blood they say is Thicke than water if I can't help my cousin or nephew then why are we family. She has been begging this man, and this man clearly can work things out.
She has a work herself but it's not self sustaining coupled with the act that she has younger ones to look after.

I have told her to look elsewhere that sometimes our helpers are not close as we think? What kinda advie would you give her



Be specific, igbos n south south help themselves. It's Yorubas that lead that chat of not giving a flying fck, me set don't know the reason. Perhaps they want to remain the head.

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by oyeb15: 12:09pm On Aug 05, 2021
Inborn rivalry. If the eldest child is the first millionaire in the family, he/she won't want the younger ones to reach that feat so that they will remain at his/her mercy as the leader.

But,If the younger or youngest child is the first millionaire, the family will balance like the case of the Obi cubanas , emoney etc

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by yusufu16: 12:10pm On Aug 05, 2021
Shayron:
I have been on this forum for quite sometime, I have been a guest all this while but my friend is in desperate need of help so I figure out it would be better if I seek you guys opinion.

I have a friend who's uncle is a well to do man works in a big organization and can use is influence to secure jobs or loans for my freind.

My freind has been at his Mercy for quite some time now, she is very hard-working though but she has witnessed the man help those who ain't even family members secure jobs in great places.

This is someone she calls family and uncle. This is not the first time of seeing this, I have seen this quite a lot it's very common amongst our people here in the south.

My question is why do family members turn your backs on you even though they have the power to help you out of your current situation. Blood they say is Thicke than water if I can't help my cousin or nephew then why are we family. She has been begging this man, and this man clearly can work things out.
She has a work herself but it's not self sustaining coupled with the act that she has younger ones to look after.

I have told her to look elsewhere that sometimes our helpers are not close as we think? What kinda advie would you give her

Your uncle doesnt owe you anything. In fact the world doesnt owe anybody anything.

Everyone for himself in this world. Hustle and change your story.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by INCREDIBLE007(m): 12:10pm On Aug 05, 2021
pathetic
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by whytediamond(m): 12:11pm On Aug 05, 2021
slawormiir:
Damnnn niggar
Just normal for Africans


They don't want to help their loved ones

Not knowing that the easiest way to become a Billionaire is to ensure that you help people around you to become a millionaire first....

And I have noticed something...it seems the uncles from our mother side are more caring and assisting than those moda fuckkking uncles from our fathers family

are you any different from the bolded?
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by afroxyz: 12:11pm On Aug 05, 2021
Why not strive and make it so that nobody would say I helped you and take your glory? The earlier you realize that nobody owes you anything, the better for you.

8 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Nobody: 12:11pm On Aug 05, 2021
Shayron:
I have been on this forum for quite sometime, I have been a guest all this while but my friend is in desperate need of help so I figure out it would be better if I seek you guys opinion.

I have a friend who's uncle is a well to do man works in a big organization and can use is influence to secure jobs or loans for my freind.

My freind has been at his Mercy for quite some time now, she is very hard-working though but she has witnessed the man help those who ain't even family members secure jobs in great places.

This is someone she calls family and uncle. This is not the first time of seeing this, I have seen this quite a lot it's very common amongst our people here in the south.

My question is why do family members turn your backs on you even though they have the power to help you out of your current situation. Blood they say is Thicke than water if I can't help my cousin or nephew then why are we family. She has been begging this man, and this man clearly can work things out.
She has a work herself but it's not self sustaining coupled with the act that she has younger ones to look after.

I have told her to look elsewhere that sometimes our helpers are not close as we think? What kinda advie would you give her

There's competition in that family. Also the man doesn't want to loose what he enjoys see her down.

If she can disappear from his circle for sometime and make a little progress. He will come around.

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by BigDawsNet: 12:13pm On Aug 05, 2021
You need to understand if God doesn't Destin your uncle to help you even if his a billionaire...he will not ...

Some people today receive blessings,favour, scholarships, great offer from someone they have no connection with or related to ...

Just be prayerful and ask God to direct your helper to you....

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by OkCornel(m): 12:13pm On Aug 05, 2021
We need to hear the full story.

It’s a multinational, not Nigerian public sector or Nigerian owned business that does man know man stuff.

Is this friend of yours qualified to meet the minimum criteria in the big organisation her uncle works?

Did she pass their aptitude tests? Or she’s expecting uncle to wave a magic wand.

There’s more to this story, when your friend is ready to give full gist, let us know.

10 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by MansoryMX(m): 12:14pm On Aug 05, 2021
Shayron:
I have been on this forum for quite sometime, I have been a guest all this while but my friend is in desperate need of help so I figure out it would be better if I seek you guys opinion.

I have a friend who's uncle is a well to do man works in a big organization and can use is influence to secure jobs or loans for my freind.

My freind has been at his Mercy for quite some time now, she is very hard-working though but she has witnessed the man help those who ain't even family members secure jobs in great places.

This is someone she calls family and uncle. This is not the first time of seeing this, I have seen this quite a lot it's very common amongst our people here in the south.

My question is why do family members turn your backs on you even though they have the power to help you out of your current situation. Blood they say is Thicke than water if I can't help my cousin or nephew then why are we family. She has been begging this man, and this man clearly can work things out.
She has a work herself but it's not self sustaining coupled with the act that she has younger ones to look after.

I have told her to look elsewhere that sometimes our helpers are not close as we think? What kinda advie would you give her

The very day you stop expecting favors or helps from Families and close friends, you become independent and self sustainable. You began to grow beyond your wildest imagination. Take it or leave it

6 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Peppysco: 12:14pm On Aug 05, 2021
I have forgotten the Yoruba adage that could have explicitly explained what I want to say but, I will translate in English and I know people who remember will quote it.
'The fact that you were born together or someone is your brother is not a guarantee that he will come good for you in you moment of needs but whoever God has directed to show you mercy will surely do'.
This happens a lot and most of us can actually attest to this but for me ooo, I nor dey send them again. Na them dey even call me say I nor dey call again, my answer, na busy I busy and now, dem see say bobo don step up too

6 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by HeavenlyHolines(m): 12:16pm On Aug 05, 2021
True family are not related by blood but by love. If your friends treat you with love and your own siblings doesn't, that friend is your true family

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by FADEO: 12:16pm On Aug 05, 2021
Beancounter94:


Because in Nigeria, when you use your influence to get loans for family members, that loan won't get paid back. Attempts to get that money would be met with 'but we are family now?'

Because in Nigeria, when you get a job for a family member, that job won't be well done, because 'i am related to the big person, no one can touch me'

The concept of family in Nigeria is 'taking advantage of someone because that someone is related to me'. Better to help stangers than to help family.

P.S The job your firend may be going for,....she might not be qualified.


This is so on point. I hope people will understand but they don't until they get to that stage in life and realize how it is easy for the family to take undue advantage of the situation. You also don't know if the man signed a conflict of interest at work too where he can't help his family member with his position as it will be termed abuse of office.

3 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by aragonchuks(m): 12:17pm On Aug 05, 2021
Life is hard Op stop being entitled, no one owes you or your friend a penny
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Lee99: 12:19pm On Aug 05, 2021
If theres one thing I've learned its to never depend on family. Just work hard on yourself, it'll all end well

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Olayetan(m): 12:24pm On Aug 05, 2021
This is the problem with nigerians,
Always waiting for someone to help them, so if he doesn't help you, will you blame him for your failure?

4 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by DeRay98(m): 12:25pm On Aug 05, 2021
Shayron:
I have been on this forum for quite sometime, I have been a guest all this while but my friend is in desperate need of help so I figure out it would be better if I seek you guys opinion.

I have a friend who's uncle is a well to do man works in a big organization and can use is influence to secure jobs or loans for my freind.

My freind has been at his Mercy for quite some time now, she is very hard-working though but she has witnessed the man help those who ain't even family members secure jobs in great places.

This is someone she calls family and uncle. This is not the first time of seeing this, I have seen this quite a lot it's very common amongst our people here in the south.

My question is why do family members turn your backs on you even though they have the power to help you out of your current situation. Blood they say is Thicke than water if I can't help my cousin or nephew then why are we family. She has been begging this man, and this man clearly can work things out.
She has a work herself but it's not self sustaining coupled with the act that she has younger ones to look after.

I have told her to look elsewhere that sometimes our helpers are not close as we think? What kinda advie would you give her

Calm down, don't swallow panadol for your friend's headache. You don't know their family history.
You don't the rich relative got to where he is, if your friend's were once in a position to help but failed to do same, if he's source of wealth is not clean and he doesn't want the curse to remain his family except him alone etc.
Let your friend hustle for herself and break through without the rich relative then in the future she'll be grateful to God and not "Uncle", then she'll be in a better position to judge later.
Cool down friend.

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by Kobicove(m): 12:25pm On Aug 05, 2021
People always assume they have some entitlement to the money of a wealthy relative undecided
Re: Why Do Some Family Members Act Like They Don't Care by MrMcJay(m): 12:25pm On Aug 05, 2021
Those you think will help you won't help you. Even if they promise, they will fail you. Help usually arises from unexpected sources.

4 Likes 1 Share

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