How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? - Family (4)

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How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by harmargedon: 6:58pm On Oct 05, 2021

Darlingme:
Why is it so difficult for most people to keep to their promises, to remit debts?
You help someone with loan based on aggreement and trust, but when it's time to remit, they come up with excuses, default, making you look like you're too weak, too simple and when you get upset and raise your voice, they tag you as being Money conscious.
On your own part, you don't want to lose relationship/friendship/family with them. you consider their struggles, yet, when they have your money either From their salaries or other means, they wouldn't still pay back.
Have you ever been in this kind of situation?
How were you able to handle this kind of people without becoming enemies?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmNFHNyHUEU

many wish to pay back, but the country is hard. I learnt from a wise man not to sell my friendship because of money. Many Nigerians currently are in serious dept, the country itself is in dept. People just want to survive, many would collect loan, but to pay is difficult. I know there are people that have and refused to pay. But before you drag your friend out, verify if she's got the money. If she doesn't I'd advice you to give her more time, but always remind her, so she'll have it in mind.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Nobody: 7:03pm On Oct 05, 2021

harmargedon:
the country is hard, the best is to stop borrowing. It's difficult for people to pay back loans. Imagine, if a country is deeply in Dept, what do you expect of its citizens.

She needed the money like her life depends on it, you need to see begging! The deadline was the following day and it was a golden opportunity that might not come in a long time. If I didn’t help her I would have been unhappy if she missed that opportunity which am fully aware of. But the crazy part is how she now see it like am disturbing her, this is someone I care about like we talk multiple times a day. Now I call and she won’t call back, I know she might be running around for the funds and thinking am calling to ask for my money. I have decided to not call her for a while and watch is she will come up with the money or part of it or keep acting dumb then that’s when I will show my madness.

3 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 7:05pm On Oct 05, 2021

tafat:
I offered them something I knew they really wanted, the clause attached to the deal happening was the borrowed money being payed back and I got my money. Kind of tricky sha cos this can only help you when you truly have something your debtor really wants

Sounds cool though, but most times, they still default not minding the next benefit after remitting

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 7:07pm On Oct 05, 2021

InvertedHammer:
/
Not until you lend money to someone who refuses to pay. You decide to go at it the hard way. But on reaching there and seeing their condition, you come dash them money join.

/

Those type of situations are different.

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by tafat: 7:09pm On Oct 05, 2021

Darlingme:
Sounds cool though, but most times, they still default not minding the next benefit after remitting

abi?

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by harmargedon: 7:13pm On Oct 05, 2021

raymondhillmimi:
She needed the money like her life depends on it, you need to see begging! The deadline was the following day and it was a golden opportunity that might not come in a long time. If I didn’t help her I would have been unhappy if she missed that opportunity which am fully aware of. But the crazy part is how she now see it like am disturbing her, this is someone I care about like we talk multiple times a day. Now I call and she won’t call back, I know she might be running around for the funds and thinking am calling to ask for my money. I have decided to not call her for a while and watch is she will come up with the money or part of it or keep acting dumb then that’s when I will show my madness.

you're on the right track. The fact is currently she owes you one. But give her time. She could be working hard to raise the money, I know it's painful, but it's good too if you see things from her point of view. Maybe you can drop a text message to ease the tension from her end.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by stevemarkdangot(m): 7:15pm On Oct 05, 2021

Currently in some debts which I took to salvage some business that went wrong. The due date I promised to repay my friend has elapsed and I really hated myself for that. Though, I keep in touch that I will pay up and always appeal to him but I still feel very ashamed of myself. I really hope and pray things get better for me.
Debt is the biggest burden anyone can have in this world.

11 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Nobody: 7:17pm On Oct 05, 2021

Klass99:

Lol , I enjoy reading your comments they amuse me.
The caveat is necessary abeg, aren't you tired of the never ending toxicity on display by some nasty elements?

Na wa for that your married friend o! And here I was thinking that if I marry some of my financial stress & strain will reduce, because hubby and I will be each other's Plan B, for rough times. As in, if I don't have I can turn to him and vice versa.

Well at least you didn't succumb to the emotional blackmail or did you? . What excuse did you give the childhood friend? I no dey carry my childhood paddies play at all, your mention of that brings back fond memories for me.

She was too reliant that I would keep lending her. Actually I was allowing her to use me, I was forming good friend. Since the day I refused to lend her money, she hasn't talked to me till now. This was 2019.

Then I basically just told my childhood friend that I couldn't lend him that money, it is too much of cash to borrow. He understood sha, he just said okay. I think he knew beforehand that I won't give him but he wanted to see if I would fall mugu.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by nedekid: 7:18pm On Oct 05, 2021

cayorday89:
Yeah, very simple, I walked into an MTN store, and requested for welcome back sim...

Sharp guy

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by descarado: 7:31pm On Oct 05, 2021

Don't put yourself in a position people will be seeing you as cbn vault. Simple.

5 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by descarado: 7:32pm On Oct 05, 2021

Kobicove:

I have made the same mistake as you but I learnt an important lesson - do not ever loan money to someone who is much older than you!

Don't lend at all if you can't forfeit it.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by valuedammy(m): 7:32pm On Oct 05, 2021

Just borrow debtors money u feel u can dash them if they refuse to pay u otherwise they will turn to ur enemy .

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Amodav: 7:36pm On Oct 05, 2021

I borrowed a friend 115k since 2018 & now my friend is in millions, the funny thing is guy man blocked my line & on all social media. Before I he packed out the hood.

3 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Kurtis02(m): 7:44pm On Oct 05, 2021

Lend a neighbor 15k, he was a salary earner. Instead of him to repay when salary came, he told me I should wait till the next month that the girlfriend birthday passed and he didn't get her anything.

I just weak.

6 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Acidosis(m): 7:47pm On Oct 05, 2021

Kurtis02:
Lend a neighbor 15k, he was a salary earner. Instead of him to repay when salary came, he told me I should wait till the next month that the girlfriend birthday passed and he didn't get her anything.

I just weak.

E reach to weak

4 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Babastrong(m): 7:56pm On Oct 05, 2021

I used to tell my friends this:
don't run away from the people that borrowed you money, just be paying it bit by bit.

ma saa fun onigbese, ma san die die, sofun pe gba ko di yi mu.

3 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by jay2smart19(m): 8:07pm On Oct 05, 2021

It's a common occurrence now. A friend called that his first M.sc exam is around the corner and it's mid month. He promised to pay by month end which is two weeks approximately from when I gave him the money without dragging cause I believed him. We de 3rd month now and chairman doesn't even reply my message. I wasn't expecting him to pay once but now bros de feel like I de disturb am.
Help if you can but don't lend money you can't forfeit.

3 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by debbydams(f): 8:07pm On Oct 05, 2021

Shifi1:
They are not your friends
Collect your by all means..
Through police or go there an disgrace them

hummmm

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Jonah507(m): 8:12pm On Oct 05, 2021

When one packed out without informing me, if you ask me to borrow you 50k, I will dash you 5k and tell you politely that I have stopped that.

It has really been of help.

4 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by ojotobiloba1: 8:13pm On Oct 05, 2021

This is wat I am facing right now. As in right now.. 30k debt from a close bro in law since may and till ds moment, no refund.. I am just weak.. Just flimsy excuses here and Dre

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by SonofGod231: 8:17pm On Oct 05, 2021

I once lended a friend $500...He said he was going to give me back the following week.
Since,I know say na guy man wey dey do well,I give am but stories cum dey come up when time to pay back reach.
One week turned into 6months,na so so abeg I go give you abeg or I'm having one family problem or the other.
For petes sake,I had to beg him to pay me atleast $300 and forget the rest.
My guy no waste time find way give me the $300 that day that day and I forfeited $200.
We are still friends but e no dey reach where money matters dey again.

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by gentleibraheem(m): 8:30pm On Oct 05, 2021

By Turning them to Enemies.

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by ceevee2003: 8:41pm On Oct 05, 2021

Depending on the amount, what I'd do after unsuccessfully trying to recover the money is to act like a fool and see it as the person's settlement. If s/he shamelessly comes back another time to borrow, that's when I will truly Shane him/her. But if the amount is significant, you are not wrong if you try to recover your money to the detriment of the friendship.

3 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by ceevee2003: 8:47pm On Oct 05, 2021

A lawyer friend of mine was murdered some time ago. Why? A money lender who was being owed some huge amounts hired him to help recover his funds through litigation. There is wickedness!!!

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by damosade(m): 9:10pm On Oct 05, 2021

Especially church members.

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Nobody: 9:18pm On Oct 05, 2021

I don’t give loans because of disappointment i just dash if it’s my money because it isn’t where I just go behind and pluck it … even if you rob me na you go tire because na coco pops lasan after breaking wall Dey here no fake living just hustle it’s less stress sometimes some are pompous but in the end we all go without even the money your chasing… or borrowing so sope

If you know me I invest I don’t impress

Nobody that has said I will pay you back has and guess what live goes on it comes back over and over but no rush enjoy your life try it

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Zico777(m): 9:54pm On Oct 05, 2021

Kurtis02:
Lend a neighbor 15k, he was a salary earner. Instead of him to repay when salary came, he told me I should wait till the next month that the girlfriend birthday passed and he didn't get her anything.

I just weak.

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Sanni45(m): 10:50pm On Oct 05, 2021

stevemarkdangot:
Currently in some debts which I took to salvage some business that went wrong. The due date I promised to repay my friend has elapsed and I really hated myself for that. Though, I keep in touch that I will pay up and always appeal to him but I still feel very ashamed of myself. I really hope and pray things get better for me.
Debt is the biggest burden anyone can have in this world.

Na man you be(irrespective of your gender)
It is underestimated how just reaching out to the person we are owing can make them give us enough room to raise the fund. But, some people go just lock up, like nothing happened between both parties and some nor go ever pick your calls again.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Sanni45(m): 10:50pm On Oct 05, 2021

Zico777:

I give up

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by adedayoa2(f): 10:52pm On Oct 05, 2021

Darlingme:
I think it depends on the amount.

well I think so too. But whatever amount it is, I believe someone gave you the money based on trust. It was 20k

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Nobody: 12:04am On Oct 06, 2021

raymondhillmimi:
She needed the money like her life depends on it, you need to see begging! The deadline was the following day and it was a golden opportunity that might not come in a long time. If I didn’t help her I would have been unhappy if she missed that opportunity which am fully aware of. But the crazy part is how she now see it like am disturbing her, this is someone I care about like we talk multiple times a day. Now I call and she won’t call back, I know she might be running around for the funds and thinking am calling to ask for my money. I have decided to not call her for a while and watch is she will come up with the money or part of it or keep acting dumb then that’s when I will show my madness.

Oga she is patiently waiting and hoping you would never bring it up, in that way it will slowly and surely become a bad debt. This is a common tactic. If you want your money back, immediately in the morning 6th Oct 2021, go and demand for your money with cutlass if possible. Also be ready to salvage whatever friendship or relationship you both have, at this point just throw it all away and get your money back.

Deciding not to call her for a while is the exact plan she playing out, oga go and collect your money. This exact tactic was used on me & I know how it ended. Wise up!

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by mignone(f): 12:23am On Oct 06, 2021

In 2018, former neighbour waited in d compound in distress before i returned frm work. Mummy, na u i dey wait o. Y me?
Na so she&another neighbour using shop in d compound started story.
Summary:
She spent her son's school fees given to her by husband on goods, with d hope of turning it over bt customers had refused to pay while d boy had resumed school.
Meanwhile, she'd lied to d husband dt she'd paid, so she kept refusing him dropping her&d boy in skul where she also worked so d man wldnt query Y his boy hadn't been given skul uniform&other items despite paying.

I took pity on her&decided to help.

Mind u, I'd to take d money frm an account i hardly touch cos it's where i keep monthly savings for rent. Hence, no debit card; wch meant I'd to go physically to d bank d ffn morning &went late to work.

We agreed she wld meet me at d bank bt she came up wif an excuse dt I eventually had to take d money to her at work.

Till now, no refund.

2 Likes

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