murphyibiam15:
I'm trying to encourage our men here to take good care of their health, physically and mentally.

It's not like women don't have theirs but those of the men are very much noticeable in the sense that it takes a toll on their physical and mental health.

(1) I entered lagos two weeks ago and I needed to take uber, this uber driver as I can guess will be bw his 50s and 60s.He needed to send money to his wife (3k)but somehow he couldn't do transfer since he was driving me but I helped him with my bank app while he gave me cash. Do you know after transferring the money his wife was ungrateful and demanded he returns home immediately (that was around 8pm).Now,the man started complaining to me how whether he brings money or not how his wife keeps complaining and he said he's pitying Nigerian men who are getting married to strange women and giving birth without knowing what they're going into. He looked stressed out and trying to make ends meet but yet his wife added more burden, not just financially but mentally. So tell me how this kind of stressed man won't die out so sooner than later. He was lucky somehow that one of his children got a scholarship to study in India.

(2) I attended a friend's wedding and to my utmost shock both fathers of the celebrants are late. Only their moms are still alive while other relatives represented their fathers. So I was wondering how their moms are still alive while their fathers are late.
Some may say men marry younger women that's why they die out but from the mothers of those celebrants they're not up to 60 years, so how much age difference that will make the two men be late?

Im saying this because I have noticed lots of people esp men are passing through a lot of stress, please men don't allow your wives, siblings or anything infact to overstress you to the point of dying out in time. We men aren't super beings, try to take things easy.

Just my 2cents, bye.

My guy you are 500% correct.In have noticed that we have more widows in the country than widowers.This means a lot of men die because of intensive stress while trying to cater for their family .Many homes crumple immediately the man dies .Women should allow their husbands to rest.

Amarisco:


https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1007/BF02506817

https://bmcfampract.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12875-016-0440-0

https://www.um.edu.mt/library/oar/bitstream/123456789/14185/1/2014-20-4.official

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1998-12057-006

http://www.postpartummen.com/pdfs/SS%26M.PDF

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1999-10525-006

These are just a few heavily cited scientific papers, but generally it’s a well understood and researched area. You don’t have to take my word for it.

You can not use research done in the US to judge a situation in Nigeria. Our societies are miles apart in every indices.
I took time to read through every single one of those. Those data do not hold true in our society. I work in a hospital in Nigeria. Men as every bit as likely to seek health care as women. Women are not paid less than men in Nigeria. Men discuss their problems, they just don't nag about it. There's a difference.
Unless you have data from research done in Nigeria, your entire premise is void

Belafonte:


Ma, please, don't quote me again. I don't like ugly women giving me attention. it's a turn off

U will just be acting like all women manipulate their kids. So all men are hardworking in the home abi? U want to tell me that there are no irresponsible men that want to reap where they did not sow. I try to always strike a balance in my comments here. There is no perfect home. Make u dey calm down. I no get power to quarel

MummyD2020:


U will just be acting like all women manipulate their kids. So all men are hardworking in the home abi? U want to tell me that there are no irresponsible men that want to reap where they did not sow. I try to always strike a balance in my comments here. There is no perfect home. Make u dey calm down. I no get power to quarel

From the way you're rewording my comments I can tell you have a big nose and extra thick lips. Please, I beg you in the name of Whomever you serve, do not quote me again. I promise you won't fall sick

Shalom

30naira:


You can not use research done in the US to judge a situation in Nigeria. Our societies are miles apart in every indices.
I took time to read through every single one of those. Those data do not hold true in our society. I work in a hospital in Nigeria. Men as every bit as likely to seek health care as women. Women are not paid less than men in Nigeria. Men discuss their problems, they just don't nag about it. There's a difference.
Unless you have data from research done in Nigeria, your entire premise is void

Na you fucc up wey you dey quote person wey go lift US studies dey extrapolate am to Nigeria. Small time she will tell you the average annual income per capita in Nigeria is $44k. You better save your breath before she goes to copy and paste a retort from American blogs for you

GenBuhari:
If it was me I had advise the uber driver to look for some other business, nobody is making a living wage from driving Uber.
Do you know the cost of foodstuff alone these days? And you want her to be grateful for #3000?

Be thankful for the little you have. Even if the cost of food should rise above heavens, courtesy demands she appreciates the one she have. It is this your attitude that facilitates entitlement mentality in women.


Shame on you.

Belafonte:


Ma, please, don't quote me again. I don't like ugly women giving me attention. it's a turn off

I just read ur comment. Go call ur miserable mum ugly. Idiot that cant disagree like a normal humanbeing. Always fast to insult people they have not met before. Go learn the etiquette of countering arguments. A normal humanbeing can never always agree with u. U know why? They have brain to think also. They have their own experiences. They read and meet people which widens their scope of knowledge. LEARN TO COUNTER ARGUMENTS WITH FACTS. Dont rub ur dysfunctional life here. Thunder fire u there. Anumanu

MummyD2020:



I just read ur comment. Go call ur miserable mum ugly. Idiot that cant disagree like a normal humanbeing. Always fast to insult people they have not met before. Go learn the etiquette of countering arguments. A normal humanbeing can never always agree with u. U know why? They have brain to think also. They have their own experiences. They read and meet people which widens their scope of knowledge. LEARN TO COUNTER ARGUMENTS WITH FACTS. Dont rub ur dysfunctional life here. Thunder fire u there. Anumanu

Thank God I'm not your husband. How can a man be unfortunate to marry an ugly nag? Tufiakwa

murphyibiam15:
I'm trying to encourage our men here to take good care of their health, physically and mentally.

It's not like women don't have theirs but those of the men are very much noticeable in the sense that it takes a toll on their physical and mental health.

(1) I entered lagos two weeks ago and I needed to take uber, this uber driver as I can guess will be bw his 50s and 60s.He needed to send money to his wife (3k)but somehow he couldn't do transfer since he was driving me but I helped him with my bank app while he gave me cash. Do you know after transferring the money his wife was ungrateful and demanded he returns home immediately (that was around 8pm).Now,the man started complaining to me how whether he brings money or not how his wife keeps complaining and he said he's pitying Nigerian men who are getting married to strange women and giving birth without knowing what they're going into. He looked stressed out and trying to make ends meet but yet his wife added more burden, not just financially but mentally. So tell me how this kind of stressed man won't die out so sooner than later. He was lucky somehow that one of his children got a scholarship to study in India.

(2) I attended a friend's wedding and to my utmost shock both fathers of the celebrants are late. Only their moms are still alive while other relatives represented their fathers. So I was wondering how their moms are still alive while their fathers are late.
Some may say men marry younger women that's why they die out but from the mothers of those celebrants they're not up to 60 years, so how much age difference that will make the two men be late?

Im saying this because I have noticed lots of people esp men are passing through a lot of stress, please men don't allow your wives, siblings or anything infact to overstress you to the point of dying out in time. We men aren't super beings, try to take things easy.

Just my 2cents, bye.

You have spoken well, they dont care to know where get money from, they will still remain ungrateful and turn the children's heart against their fathers... Anyways, some wise kids can discern from childhood and truely tell who is bringing things to the table.

To real men out there, may God continue to bless you as you strive to provide for the family. Stay focused and healthy mentally and physically

Osobi32:
exactly what am talking about. I never knew what my father went through until I became a father, all the times he comes home and night and my mom will be acting up. Niggar must have had a rough day, maybe swallowed insults from different angle just to provide for his family and yet never get appreciated. This is really sad

When one ain't in the shoes one wont understand....
I realized when I lost mine.. still regretting it... cus dem dey hit me hard

Amarisco:
On the contrary, research indicates that women go through more e.g. victims of violence, lower pay, birth etc but just have better coping strategies. Strategies such as being more likely to seek medical help early, rely on social support systems and openly acknowledge the emotional impact of adverse experiences.

This is never so in our clime here

This world is a battle field, men are at the frontier. Some fight longer because they posses the requisite skill and strategy to push hard while other men lack this.
The mentality that the man is a 'bread winner' is a sure bullet that kills really faster.
Many men have place their bullet proof at the back instead of protecting the soft target which is in front.
I will fight to see all my children get married, i will drink their wine on their day of matrimony, no one will represent me. I will not plant and nurture for another man to harvest in Jesus name. Amen

Simdyofficial:
Stress or no stress.. Everybody go die... U no want stress but you go still carry big gbola dey panelbeat big ass. Lol.

Live life bruh.. Only poor men reason this way..

Very typical, same reason those poor men are engaged in fetish stuff to get rich, how old are you, everyone can't be rich, everyone can't have everything they need, that he love sex doesn't mean he should die of stress.

Every man his own, if you as a guy don't learn, you see ladies like the one quoted above, run for your life, they are just vampire, they suck until you are dry.

I once asked my Aunt, why is it that, when I was struggling, trying to make anything of myself you never said or persuaded me to get married, but the moment you discover things are going well you keep ringing the marriage bell.

In other words, once you are comfortable, they feel you are too comfortable, add a woman to complicate your life.

DisLifeSha:
As for me, am a young man from a single mother. I've type 1 diabetes which has negatively affected all areas of my life. I find it very hard to buy the drug I take and the food I eat. I stress myself for nothing everyday pushing wheelbarrow to sell food. My mother even prefers me to die sometimes when I complain about my hard situation

So sorry. You have to go traditional. And find drugs to help. From international organizations online.

So sorry.

Osobi32:
God will surely bless u and give u the grace to fulfil ur promises.

Amen and bless you too... Thank you

Osobi32:
God will surely bless u and give u the grace to fulfil ur promises.

Amen and you too. Thank you

Thanks for dropping this, you've spoken for a lot of men, real men that do real jobs, legit hustle, not the ones on the other side.

Try to rest, do what gives you joy, spend cash on yourself if you have some, go on vacations, shop for yourself, spend time with your bois wey get sense and just have fun.

May God help US

bepositive11:


[s]The problem is the lack of open, direct, and honest communication

The man in number 1, has he communicated his troubles to his wife?

This lack of effective communication starts with society telling men not to be emotionally vulnerable because it would make them look weak. And then women assuming that men who can be emotionally vulnerable are weak

The change needs to start with society. Men are also humans with emotional struggles

The happiest marriages are the ones where both husband and wife can be vulnerable without each other using that vulnerability against them. Where there's mutual love and respect and open communication[/s]

trash

30naira:


You can not use research done in the US to judge a situation in Nigeria. Our societies are miles apart in every indices.
I took time to read through every single one of those. Those data do not hold true in our society. I work in a hospital in Nigeria. Men as every bit as likely to seek health care as women. Women are not paid less than men in Nigeria. Men discuss their problems, they just don't nag about it. There's a difference.
Unless you have data from research done in Nigeria, your entire premise is void

Exactly.
I'm in the health sector too,women do not seek health care more than men,except if you count when they bring their kids.

OLRAYS:
wetin this one dey talk...pray say make God give u better wife...85% of women, no matter how hard u dey strive to satisfy them...my brother u no do anything na wetin go come out of their mouth..u never hear this adage wey say "any good thing wey woman do for her husband house na by mistake"

Lolzzzz!!!

Traditional don't have the solution

damola1:


So sorry. You have to go traditional. And find drugs to help. From international organizations online.

So sorry.

GenBuhari:
If it was me I had advise the uber driver to look for some other business, nobody is making a living wage from driving Uber.
Do you know the cost of foodstuff alone these days? And you want her to be grateful for #3000?

What Uber drivers Net most salary earners don't earn it in a month.

SweetiliciousD:
This topic is a sad truth. I know of a woman who has been to yankee twice for omugwo. The training of the daughter was 100% paid by the struggling man. She went to yankee at the expense of her husbands failing health.

Lucky Dube said it all "Men are born to suffer"

I won't coman kill myself....I no go suffer alone, we suffer together.

Amarisco:
On the contrary, research indicates that women go through more e.g. victims of violence, lower pay, birth etc but just have better coping strategies. Strategies such as being more likely to seek medical help early, rely on social support systems and openly acknowledge the emotional impact of adverse experiences.

You're right on seeking medical help and acknowledging the impact of sad experiences, where as men don't do.
They form bosses, strong & tend to suppress pains & unfavorable conditions without speaking out...it kills slowly!
Men should learn to open up!

Live your life to your own taste o ye men.

Amarisco:
On the contrary, research indicates that women go through more e.g. victims of violence, lower pay, birth etc but just have better coping strategies. Strategies such as being more likely to seek medical help early, rely on social support systems and openly acknowledge the emotional impact of adverse experiences.

Which lower pay? Are you telling me GT Bank pays a female staff less than what they pay a male staff in the same level with her? Are you telling me that a male level 14 officer in government gets more pay than his female colleague in the same level as him? Are you telling me that Linda Ikeji gets less pay than male bloggers? Please make it make sense, and stop repeating what you read online, written by American feminists.

Divorce is one of the remedial actions relative to horrible wives but it's considered absurd in this part of the world.

murphyibiam15:
I'm trying to encourage our men here to take good care of their health, physically and mentally.

It's not like women don't have theirs but those of the men are very much noticeable in the sense that it takes a toll on their physical and mental health.

(1) I entered lagos two weeks ago and I needed to take uber, this uber driver as I can guess will be bw his 50s and 60s.He needed to send money to his wife (3k)but somehow he couldn't do transfer since he was driving me but I helped him with my bank app while he gave me cash. Do you know after transferring the money his wife was ungrateful and demanded he returns home immediately (that was around 8pm).Now,the man started complaining to me how whether he brings money or not how his wife keeps complaining and he said he's pitying Nigerian men who are getting married to strange women and giving birth without knowing what they're going into. He looked stressed out and trying to make ends meet but yet his wife added more burden, not just financially but mentally. So tell me how this kind of stressed man won't die out so sooner than later. He was lucky somehow that one of his children got a scholarship to study in India.

(2) I attended a friend's wedding and to my utmost shock both fathers of the celebrants are late. Only their moms are still alive while other relatives represented their fathers. So I was wondering how their moms are still alive while their fathers are late.
Some may say men marry younger women that's why they die out but from the mothers of those celebrants they're not up to 60 years, so how much age difference that will make the two men be late?

Im saying this because I have noticed lots of people esp men are passing through a lot of stress, please men don't allow your wives, siblings or anything infact to overstress you to the point of dying out in time. We men aren't super beings, try to take things easy.

Just my 2cents, bye.

God help men. Women get wahala I repeat they are very troublesome. Though there are some whom are very calm and hospitable sha.. bt few, very few.

Hmm

Amarisco:


https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1007/BF02506817

https://bmcfampract.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12875-016-0440-0

https://www.um.edu.mt/library/oar/bitstream/123456789/14185/1/2014-20-4.official

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1998-12057-006

http://www.postpartummen.com/pdfs/SS%26M.PDF

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1999-10525-006

These are just a few heavily cited scientific papers, but generally it’s a well understood and researched area. You don’t have to take my word for it.

while your sources may be correct based on their findings of response to stress and coping with stress, it speaks liitle of your other assertions like women suffering more violence. Also your sources only considered work related stress. It never talked about stress suffered due to family burden and emotionally stress from women on their patners save for work stress women face in conjunction with the need to take care of children. About pay gaps this is an open lie. There is no way men would earn more than women in similar positions working same number or hours

@ oyolohi your theory is starting to make sense and I feel myself getting sucked in.

A man’s problem is the inability to keep that stingy DNA in check. However, do you have a solution for this? How can a man have ‘fun’ with a woman without replicating?

Like a factual way, but just by the use of condom or what not.

Lightway:


This is not Nigerian or African.... so shut the hell up

The level of your thinking is pitiful

30naira:


You can not use research done in the US to judge a situation in Nigeria. Our societies are miles apart in every indices.
I took time to read through every single one of those. Those data do not hold true in our society. I work in a hospital in Nigeria. Men as every bit as likely to seek health care as women. Women are not paid less than men in Nigeria. Men discuss their problems, they just don't nag about it. There's a difference.
Unless you have data from research done in Nigeria, your entire premise is void

Unfortunately for you, the scientific world doesn’t care about your opinion. Which is what your comment is full of and empty of any academic research.

Furthermore, though generalisability is always an issue, no research is flawless. That doesn’t discount the findings bro.

& if you think that gender roles in the 21st century are ‘miles apart in every instance*’ which you probably meant to say instead of indices, then we no longer need to have this discussion.