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What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Snapchat: 4:48pm On Nov 25, 2021
My 6 year old cousin said I’m owing him N10 Billion Naira. I wish I was kidding lol.

If they decide to sell me and him, that amount is a far cry from what we’d be sold for �

7 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Mariangeles(f): 4:49pm On Nov 25, 2021
Ceska:
My son just learnt colours and appropriate colours for each gender . At the time, I had a red car , then one day he asked me if my car was a girl

I don't believe in appropriating colours to gender. cheesy
I'm a female and I'm blue, beige, gray...

7 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Bobxin: 4:50pm On Nov 25, 2021
Ceska:
My son just learnt colours and appropriate colours for each gender . At the time, I had a red car , then one day he asked me if my car was a girl
lol, tha made me smile
Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Benwallt(m): 4:52pm On Nov 25, 2021
I once wore a shirt to a school, "Animal kingdom" was written boldly on the shirt then one small girl asked me and I quote "Are you an animal?" meeehn my eyes red, I wish nobody was looking I would have given her a knock.

27 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Kajaard: 4:53pm On Nov 25, 2021
My niece always tells me her daddy is the best daddy in the whole world. Whenever she says this myself and my senior brother ( her dad) would just smile smiley

Kids are wonderful cool

18 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by ppogba: 4:55pm On Nov 25, 2021
After coming back from.school on a particular day, this conversation ensued between my son and I

Son: Daddy, how old are you? ( Immediately I know there is trouble)
Me: Why did you ask?
Son: Tobi told me his daddy is 40. years old
Me: So what now happened?
Son: Then, David said is daddy is 50 years old.
Me: What did you now say?
Son: I told them you are 99 years old.

Conversation ended. Apparently, he never wanted any age to be higher than his father's.

79 Likes 10 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by abbaashiru(m): 4:56pm On Nov 25, 2021
Me that I'll form I'm warning my 1 YEAR 5 MNTH old kid pointing my fingers, he'll carry his small fingers pointing me yearning gibberish... grin grin grin

24 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Blessings27(f): 4:57pm On Nov 25, 2021
The day I bought a sanitary pad and I dropped it on the bed in the room, my 2years old daughter brought it to the kitchen where I was cooking and Said "Mummy come and wear your pampas"

62 Likes 5 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Kajaard: 4:58pm On Nov 25, 2021
maureensylvia:
My son o

So I was busy in the kitchen preparing lunch for the family, I was actually making fried rice with my FOREIGN STANDARD LOCAL RICE cheesy

You all know the process it takes to prepare fried rice, I was still cutting the vegetables my son came into the kitchen, you can't imagine what he said grin

"Mum it's taking you ***24 hours**to prepare this rice, do fast please

I was like whaaaaaat shocked shocked who thought you that weird exaggeration shocked

I just weak
Well,
The rice came out tasty, non soggy, stone free

I like your son. I am like that as well. When I was younger whenever my mum was taking time to prepare very nice meals for us I would just run to the kitchen and tell her to hurry up, don't you know we are hungry mummy. Just give us anything to eat, we cannot wait for this your oyibo food cheesy

15 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Oharina(m): 5:00pm On Nov 25, 2021
olaniyiYAH:
My 11 months old boy laid hand on my stomach and praying for me
Lolz... Linus Mba

1 Like

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Thryphosa(m): 5:02pm On Nov 25, 2021
My little cousin came visiting for holiday, a man insisted he prostrated to greet him cos even his mum will bend to greet him cos he's way older than his mum, this boy responded by saying "ibanuje lojo ori, ipo lagba" meaning age is nothing but the position you hold is more important. Immediately this man busted into tears, my mum, dad and other people had to beg and console him that he didn't have idea of what he said, that he just heard people saying it and he said it. My cousin's mum was a nurse then and that man a poor farmer, this happened late 1990s.

27 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by adebayour26: 5:02pm On Nov 25, 2021
Sermwell:
Just because I told a child that the first name is always your name and the second one is your father's name.

He went to argue with his friends that Christ is the father of Jesus!
This boy is a deep thinker. He's quite intelligent.

12 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by vickydevoka(m): 5:03pm On Nov 25, 2021
Ekakamba:




Me: yaro ya dai?

Child: lafiya lau malam.

Me: mai ka chi yau?

Child: banchi komai ba, baba da mama ne kawai sun chi gindi.

Me:
[img]https://c./hkNyMnCRLsYAAAAC/scared-shocked.gif[/img]

grin tongue
Lol. I no de hear Hausa like dat but dis one I hear am. Na nyash papa n mama de chop. Chai

1 Like

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Immanmafavour: 5:05pm On Nov 25, 2021
I told my sister's 8yrs old daughter that today is valentine's eve the next day she ask me Aunty when is valentine's adam

20 Likes 3 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by adebayour26: 5:05pm On Nov 25, 2021
My Mum was in my brother's place and brother's wife served food to grandma (my Mum) first, then she served my niece. Grandma jokingly said "let me eat from your food".

This girl just replied grandma that "the food infront of you, do you want to pour it away"

46 Likes 3 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by GardenOfGod(m): 5:09pm On Nov 25, 2021
I love this thread grin My younger sister when she was 5 or so, was given her plate of soup and eba. When she saw the soup, shouted angrily, "my soup is very small". Omo we burst into laughter... Today she's in service. When we remind her, she would smile and say "yes ofcouse my soup was too small" grin grin grin

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by vickydevoka(m): 5:09pm On Nov 25, 2021
Sermwell:
Just because I told a child that the first name is always your name and the second one is your father's name.

He went to argue with his friends that Christ is the father of Jesus!
Jesus Christ

1 Like

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by mrclassic01(m): 5:10pm On Nov 25, 2021
Mine was when i promised to take her to the market and begged her to give me some few minutes because i was having a visitor (babe). She now came back after some time and knocked at my door and noticed the door was lock from inside. This is what she said

She: Uncle, u never finish?

I was so embarrassed that day. Lol

Me and my babe we're inside laughing

16 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by mjaylala(m): 5:11pm On Nov 25, 2021
Mariangeles:


Translation please. cheesy
nasty nasty translation men..... In a nutshell they asked the kids have they eaten, they replied no but it's only mummy and daddy that have eaten each other "if you know what I mean"

1 Like

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by emmeyen: 5:11pm On Nov 25, 2021
adebayour26:
My Mum was in my brother's place and brother's wife served food to grandma (my Mum) first, then she served my niece. Grandma jokingly said "let me eat from your food".
This girl just replied grandma that "the food infront of you, do you want to pour it away?"

This one got me. How do they even process these things they say in their head?

2 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Guyman02: 5:13pm On Nov 25, 2021
I was in Catholic church one day and after sharing holy communion the priest went back to the altar and started eating the remaining one in the plate.
Suddenly, one little boy in front said 'Hmmm Father You can eat for Africa o'
The priest heard it and almost chocked on holy communion due to sudden burst of laughter. grin grin

44 Likes 4 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Collegenews: 5:14pm On Nov 25, 2021
Toeyean1507:

My 2 year old when he's about eating ' mummy come and eat, thank you ma'



Very few would understand this. grin grin
Sweet and very funny at the same time. grin
Send my regards to the little soldier.

2 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Box18: 5:14pm On Nov 25, 2021
kay29000:
Some years back, I was babysitting my 3 year old nephew in my apartment...

Nephew, "uncle Kay, have you killed all the mosquitoes outside?"

Uncle Kay, "No. Why did you ask?" I said to him, wondering why he asked the question.

Nephew, "Then, why did you leave the door open."

I realized I did leave the entrance door open... But the way he said it with a straight face made me bust out laughing.
aha this one shock me.

2 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by diplomat058(m): 5:15pm On Nov 25, 2021
Sermwell:
Just because I told a child that the first name is always your name and the second one is your father's name.

He went to argue with his friends that Christ is the father of Jesus!
You probably misled the child. Next time, you may consider explaining exemptions to the rule to children, so they don't go about about with the idea that the knowledge they have is absolute.
I was once told by a University Undergrad that a B.Sc. Chemistry Graduate can become a pharmacist by simply doing masters degree in pharmacy. I went around telling Jambites until one challenged me and I had to figure out the falsity of the claim myself

2 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by nnol(m): 5:15pm On Nov 25, 2021
A cousin of mine use to call an uncle who bears the name oke, "Oke Rat" and the uncle will reply in igbo obu Nne gi na Nna gi bu "Oke Rat". Actually his name is Okechukwu but we do call him Oke for short form.

8 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Gbadebo01(m): 5:16pm On Nov 25, 2021
Ekakamba:




Me: yaro ya dai?

Child: lafiya lau malam.

Me: mai ka chi yau?

Child: banchi komai ba, baba da mama ne kawai sun chi gindi. Plenty people will need subtitle for this one. grin grin
Me:
[img]https://c./hkNyMnCRLsYAAAAC/scared-shocked.gif[/img]

grin tongue
Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Gbadebo01(m): 5:17pm On Nov 25, 2021
Ekakamba:




Me: yaro ya dai?

Child: lafiya lau malam.

Me: mai ka chi yau?

Child: banchi komai ba, baba da mama ne kawai sun chi gindi.
Me:
[img]https://c./hkNyMnCRLsYAAAAC/scared-shocked.gif[/img]

grin tongue
Plenty people will need subtitle for this one. grin grin
Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by diplomat058(m): 5:18pm On Nov 25, 2021
Baawaa:
When my 2years daughter said my daddy go to your room my mummy want to change her dress.
I was just grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
This is funny. She doesn't know daddy and mummy are spoilt grin grin

4 Likes

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by Sttk: 5:19pm On Nov 25, 2021
None
Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by eedimo(m): 5:21pm On Nov 25, 2021
Deborah98:
My last sister, remembered the day I rushed out to get something and unknown to me I wore the wrong slippers like i picked two wrong pair so when she saw me coming back can you imagine what she said,aunty debo when will you learn to be an adult abi how she put am undecided omo I weak,my dad was like are we sure this girl is a child or an old woman. The girl can talk for Africa,she's just 5. And then there was a day one of my siblings cracked a joke that got us all laughing and rolling on the ground, this same girl was like we're laughing without brains shuuuu how are we suppose to laugh sad omo her words dey shock us no be lie

I'm gonna love that child.
Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by eedimo(m): 5:23pm On Nov 25, 2021
How I love kids, I pray God grant my request soon.

25 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What's The Funniest Thing You've Heard From A Child? by eedimo(m): 5:23pm On Nov 25, 2021
.

2 Likes

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