The moment you chose not to use a condom, you chose the unfair side of life as your destiny.

So you think its okay to live with someone's daughter and be having constant sex with her without paying her bride price. Would you want the same for your own daughter?

You better keep wailing. You are terribly irresponsible and I am sure if we were to hear from the other party, we would have been able to find out how much of a blatant liar you are.

C'mon getat!

frozen70:


If you really want to marry her, reconcile with her and introduce her to your family

If you know that you don't have plans for marriage, just keep calm and follow them the way they are

It will sort itself out

What offence did he commit that he will go and be reconciling?

Witlee1:


How can't you take your time and read? I'm surprised people like you passed out of school successfully that's if you went to school.
Where did I write I'm insisting on the baby?

You are just daft
Enjoy the mention you won't get it again

Ita not about insulting him. You insisted she keeps the child, which she did. Normally, since she's not engaged nor married to you, you don't have the right to insist on anything. Take it that she respected you. Hence she's not staying with you, even in court, she'll most likely be awarded custody of that child.
You can't marry her because of money but you've been spending on the child for almost two years. Doesn't make any sense to me.
Why do men hate marriage so much? You can spend every kobo on you for a child, but you want it's mother to remain a single mom "because of money".

Well, it's not good judging on one side of the story. Of course, you wouldn't want to paint yourself bad here.

Anyways, just marry the gf so she can enjoy some Buhari-hardship. Las las, she go run away leaving the kid in your care.

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans to marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

your story be as e get...you said you're funding some part of her education and the baby is with her mother while you and your girlfriend is staying together. how come she is now siding with her mother?...and didn't you do formal introduction by bringing your family to meet her family before the baby was born?...and,if not,you've been towing the wrong path. however, whatever you do,don't allow them deny you access of seeing your child and I guess the Nigerian paternity laws says she can have the custody of the child until nine years then you can have the child but for now,you cannot be denied access totally.

you should also go to the place they summon you to.....

In addition, if the girl is an Igbo girl.,.you have to be very careful cos I heard they collected any baby born out of wedlock due to their tradition.....

Digmygold:
The moment you chose not to use a condom, you chose the unfair side of life as your destiny.

So you think its okay to live with someone's daughter and be having constant sex with her without paying her bride price. Would you want the same for your own daughter?

You better keep wailing. You are terribly irresponsible and I am sure if we were to hear from the other party, we would have been able to find out how much of a blatant liar you are.

C'mon getat!

Can u explain how he is irresponsible? Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her? Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

juman:
Don't get hypertension because they plan to run away with the child, they would be begging you to have relationship with her latter when the child constantly asking for her father.

Get more children from other woman or women.

That was in the 20th century. In this century, children don't go looking for what's not lost.

Ussycool:
It is too bad bro.
The issue on ground is too complicated, you have said your part man, how can we hear the other part of the story?
Well, you have every right to take ur child and take full responsibility as a father. You don't owe them much, but marry your girlfriend should be your priority. If you realy love her, don't distance yourself from her.

This is the must foolish response I ever came across on NL. A fool who got a girl pregnant knowing well that he can neither cater for the mother nor the child upon refusing to use condom, couldn't suggest postinor within 24 hours, neglected the poor girl n child to be catered for by her mother without any support be it material financial or spiritual just came back from hell feeling entitled to a child.

Someone need to bang the head of the 2 of you with a sledge hammer. You think taking care of a child is same with taking car of a dog abi have you gone mad with this your hopeless comment.

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans to marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

Ur child will always be ur child. Leave them to their pettiness and go and hussle. They will be the ones begging u.

Witlee1:


Thank you

How can I start the process?

You don't have money to marry but have for lawyer.

You are not being fair and that's why your mother in law is against you.

Your gf status is now single mom. It's a nightmare to any parent to see his or her child that way a disgrace.

Witlee1:


Thank you I appreciate, I have plans to marry her but not when I'm finding it hard to get on my feet
I have tried engaging my gf on what is on ground but she isn't even showing any sign of wanting to have a talk, people have advised me to blank her totally with the child but cuz I love her I don't want to

you love her take care of her and your baby still you don't want to marry her because tight of economy bros reason the matter yourself if you love her do the needful.

lexy2014:


Can u explain how he is irresponsible? Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her? Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

I am not surprised at someone who has indiscriminate unprotected sex like a stray street dog.

Did you read bride price in anything I wrote? He no wan pay bride price but he carry another person daughter for house using her like a LovePeddler and housegirl and would probably stupidly put her in the family way again and come here wailing like say na us dey help am bleep the babe. I hope the never to be mother inlaw bathes him with acid anytime he shows up at their doorstep.

I hope your daughter go mumu like that for 30 men. So that you can feel the pain of a parent. Evil, irresponsible souls everywhere.

Digmygold:


I am not surprised at someone who has indiscriminate unprotected sex like a stray street dog.

Did you read bride price in anything I wrote? He no wan pay bride price but he carry another person daughter for house using her like a LovePeddler and housegirl and would probably stupidly put her in the family way again and come here wailing like say na us dey help am bleep the babe. I hope the never to be mother inlaw bathes him with acid anytime he shows up at their doorstep.

I hope your daughter go mumu like that for 30 men. So that you can feel the pain of a parent. Evil, irresponsible souls everywhere.

U haven't answered the questions:

1. Can u explain how he is irresponsible?

2. Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her?

3. Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

lexy2014:


U haven't answered the questions:

1. Can u explain how he is irresponsible?

2. Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her?

3. Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

Moro.nic Jamb question. So you actually are so shallow that you can't pick answers to your dumb questions from what I wrote? Its people like you that their daughters get impregnated by 3 different men with none getting married to them. Its called Karma.

Please get treated for your myopic disease. ASAP. SMH.

Digmygold:


Moro.nic Jamb question. So you actually are so shallow that you can't pick answers to your dumb questions from what I wrote? Its people like you that their daughters get impregnated by 3 different men with none getting married to them. Its called Karma.

Please get treated for your myopic disease. ASAP. SMH.

Still doesn't answer the questions:

1. Can u explain how he is irresponsible?

2. Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her?

3. Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

Loreettaa:

That was in the 20th century. In this century, children don't go looking for what's not lost.

Baba suwe an actor that just died.
His medical doctor son recently reconnected with him as his father.

Go and watch muary show and paternity show on youtube.
You will see even people in forties and fifties crying to know their real father.

Digmygold:


Moro.nic Jamb question. So you actually are so shallow that you can't pick answers to your dumb questions from what I wrote? Its people like you that their daughters get impregnated by 3 different men with none getting married to them. Its called Karma.

Please get treated for your myopic disease. ASAP. SMH.

If u passed Jamb, then answering the following questions shouldn't be a challenge for u:

1. Can u explain how he is irresponsible?

2. Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her?

3. Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

lexy2014:


Still doesn't answer the questions:

1. Can u explain how he is irresponsible?

2. Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her?

3. Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

Visit Yaba Left. You need urgent mental medical intervention. Irresponsible Deadbeat.

You no know how to use condom? Face the consequences of your stupidity and irresponsibility.

Loreettaa:

That was in the 20th century. In this century, children don't go looking for what's not lost.

Why?

Digmygold:


Visit Yaba Left. You need urgent mental medical intervention. Irresponsible Deadbeat.

You no know how to use condom? Face the consequences of your stupidity and irresponsibility.

U sound hurt but allowing your emotions spiral out of control won't answer d questions:

1. Can u explain how he is irresponsible?

2. Is he d first man on earth to have sex with a lady before marrying her?

3. Are u telling me that all d sex u have had in your life u paid bride price first before having sex?

4. How did u no about condom? What is it used for?

HEBEI:
Lubbish

Did you say "lol" My brother you should be sober instead. This is not the time to laugh out loud.

Stop blaming anybody and blame yourself instead. You are not ready to marry, but you are cohabiting with somebody's daughter.

Nigerian economy if too harsh on you to marry, but not that harsh on you to sleep with somebody's daughter and get her pregnant

Some guys sef

How about the someone's daughter that was cohabiting with him under the roof he pays rent and opens her legs to be lashed anytime the nigga feels like... probably multiple time a day.
Abi did he rape her or force her to cohabit with him, or was her mother not having a house that she ran to the guys house to live, feed and get bleeped?
Was her mother not aware that her child was cohabiting with a man she is not married to?.
Why are u blaming the guy now for collecting in kind what he gave in cash

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans to marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

You no get finance to cater for a baby, But you get Long Prick to pregnant woman ....u be mumu. Oga cry ur cry abeg

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans toy marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

I read this and as a linguist i can tell from your writing that if your girlfriend and her mum is given the platform to tell their own story here you will be at fault. Those telling you to go to court... it will worsen the situation. Nigeria customary court recognise tradition and culture too. If you never married the mother you can't forcefully take the baby. Follow the part of peace. You and the girl love each other. It is just a trying time. Things can be redeemed. Calm down and follow it wisely. Na lack of money dey cause all this. But everything will be fine

Digmygold:


Visit Yaba Left. You need urgent mental medical intervention. Irresponsible Deadbeat.

You no know how to use condom? Face the consequences of your stupidity and irresponsibility.

Have u used a condom before? What did u use it to do and on what occasion did u use it?

Kindly share your use of condom experience

HEBEI:
Lubbish

Did you say "lol" My brother you should be sober instead. This is not the time to laugh out loud.

Stop blaming anybody and blame yourself instead. You are not ready to marry, but you are cohabiting with somebody's daughter.

Nigerian economy if too harsh on you to marry, but not that harsh on you to sleep with somebody's daughter and get her pregnant

Some guys sef

God bless you.He is not ready for marriage because of economic situation of Nigeria but claimed he has been paying the girl school fee and taking care of the baby.

Op.imagine your daughter in university pregnant for a guy who claimed to love her.After two years the said guy have enough to cater for his child and also help your daughter with school fees.And the guy refused to proceed to next level which is marriage but living together with your daughter.How will you feel as a parent.

Bigpapi:








You no get finance to cater for a baby, But you get Long Prick to pregnant woman ....u be mumu. Oga cry ur cry abeg

Did u read what u responded to?

Since the economy is good enough for you to mount on the girl, better visit the girls family with your family if you need the child. Use that money you are spending on the girl to settle the basic traditional marriage rites then she and the child becomes yours. If another man takes her and she accepts, the man may take the child if he desires to.
A stitch in time saves eleven these days, not just nine.

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans to marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

First of all, I think you are in with the wrong set of people. Mistake happened between both of you, you accept responsibility but please for time for proper marriage and they said no. Why will the mother be pushing her daughter, an undergraduate into marriage? Is either they have seen your bright future and scared that you may change your mind or they just want to make life difficult for both of you.
Well all I have to tell you is to brace up, your life may not remain as you planned, yes you get me right. You cannot remain your usual gentle boy and cross this huddle before you. You are going to need to be pragmatic in your approach, put emotions aside. I can see you defending your gf already, that not pragmatic approach. Get legal advise on how you can possibly remain unmarried but have access to your child. But before then, blank them for two months. Don't even ask anyone about them, thereafter make move to present your stand to the girls family officially and if that doesn't make any change, go for the legal advise but at that point, rule her out of your possible future wife.
Finally

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans to marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

See the kain rubbish common N50 condom suppose prevent

HEBEI:
Lubbish

Did you say "lol" My brother you should be sober instead. This is not the time to laugh out loud.

Stop blaming anybody and blame yourself instead. You are not ready to marry, but you are cohabiting with somebody's daughter.

Nigerian economy if too harsh on you to marry, but not that harsh on you to sleep with somebody's daughter and get her pregnant

Some guys sef

You deserve a bottle of champagne. The guy obviously is a selfish player, his reaction would have been worse if somebody else treats his blood sister same way.

Cantonese:


He is not daft bro.

You make it sound so easy from your angle, or that you are getting cheated of your right. When you have an adult daughter, you will defend her, if she falls into that situation.

Your first sentence initially depicted you as not the father of the child as you said “my gf got pregnant”. I read through also until you said “my baby”, thereby clarifying the point that you are the father of the child.

I like the fact that you do not subscribe to abortions, but when you get a woman pregnant, you must be prepared to bear the responsibilities that follow.

Truly you cannot eat your cake and have it. When you have an unplanned pregnancy as you have encountered, wisdom, cooperation and understanding must be allowed to work.

You claimed that you could not foot the bill of a family, yet you have retained the young woman, accommodating her and paying her school fees. What will happen if she gets pregnant again? Have you thought about the possibility too? You surrendered responsibility of the child to the grandma the day you handed over. Now she sees you as not being able to support a family, so she wants her daughter to abandon you, irrespective of the child between the two of you.

Most parents rise to defend their children in cases like this and some choose the extreme of severing ties, just like this woman has done with her child.

I think that you need to get some reasonable people with you to meet the family of the lady. If the lady wishes to go on with a marriage now and you are not ready, then you must take a decision to either let her go or marry her even with your status.

On the child, you need to sort it out with the girl physically, so they do not stop you from seeing the child. Your child needs to grow knowing you are involved completely in her life, no matter what happens.

Cheers.

You deserve a bottle of champagne.
I’m sure his reaction would have been worse if somebody else treats his blood sister same way.

Witlee1:
My gf got pregnant, I'm not an advocate of abortion so I told her to keep it so I and my live-in gf had a child (girl) outside wedlock who is 2 years old now and I took care of her and the child for 1 year and 8 months,paid the hospital bills and everything, which a single dough of the girls family didn't come to the wellbeing of the child, it was All me which the mother of the girl is aware of.

Though I dont want to marry the girl now due to the harsh economy of Nigeria but I have plans to marry her later on plus I can't just jump into marriage when I'm not yet able to cater for a family yet so I told her to keep the child with her mother till I can be able to stand on my feet and foster for us all,me and my gf still lived together without the baby and I helped her pay some fees for her school cuz I understood that for my baby to be educated the mother needs to be .

Fast forward to now, the mother of my gf doesn't want me to see my child because I don't want to marry my gf now, my gf and her mother had to even report me to human rights for me never to contact my gf any longer cuz I am threatening her which I never did... I tried contacting my gf to know what is happening, she's not picking her calls neither is the mother too and when I texted my gf she rained insults on me lol (life's so unfair)

NB: I learnt from a reliable source that the mother of my gf is the one Influencing her this way,my gf is also in her 3rd year at school
I'm so confused, please advice me on next step to take

Are u sure that you are the biological father and you perform ur duty as man during her pregnancy if YES go to the court