hayzed1090:


You see this your reasoning is responsible for the recent high rate of divorce, and its most likely to continue increasing looking at the number of people that have been brainwashed to believe your new CIVILIZED ORIENTATION.

Men and women , Husband and Wife - are not equal and will never be equal.. The natural relationship is EQUITY and not EQUALITY.

Been a husband gives you some right at the expense of wife , also as a wife you enjoy some opportunities that the husband is denied.

the issue is not about as you think, its about giving women right to access to things eg to drive, vote or owning land etc that are blocked by men, eg in UK women started to be allowed to vote in 1928 for them during that time that was their feminism, the in Saudi Arabia women granted the right to drive in 2018, in simply terms those are some on fiminism rights women fought for in their respective countries

Most men dont understand feminism becoz women abuse it eg 1 minute she wants to be treated eqaully the next minute she wasnt to be treated like a lady

then the other is men dont want the set-up to change becoz we benefit more from it

Proudlyngwa:


Everything is based on level of containment

A lot of western families especially Latinos/ asians still run provider administrator system ant they are very comfortable.

i dont dispute your views an neither am saying your wrong and am right, we are just sharing views etc

Hmmmm

ZIMDRILL:


dont expect that every lives according to the bible thats your 1st mistake

2nd is equal means alot of thing, eg some parents dont support their daughter to get the highest education simply becoz they believe that she will get married one day and move away so she is not worth supporting, feminism is just pointing at things that disadvantages women meaning they want to be treated fairly as men or given same opportunities as men

what the Bible said is a fact. God configured man to be different in every aspect. That’s why you hardly see women inventors. Women are naturally created to depend on men.

Simran94:



A lot is happening in marriages of these centuries.
Many of our Grandmothers and mothers were full housewives, many of them endured domestic violence and had to endure it because they had nowhere to go or money to take care of themselves and kids. Many of our fathers and grandfathers would have affairs outside their marriages with their wives knowing about it and there’s nothing they can do about it, some of those men went as far as bringing children they had outside into their homes and forcing their wives to accept them as one of their own or they could as well leave the marriage. But nowadays, women are no longer trying to be full housewives with no source of income, women are no longer trying to endure domestic violence(well some), you try that and they walk away (Marriage is not a do or die affair). Women are no longer trying to be cheated on or walked all over like some slave according to the way African tradition sees women.

Some men don’t like it when their wives earn more than them, it makes them feel less of a man so they would rather ask their wives to quit their jobs and no woman would do that.

That’s for the women aspect according to personal surveys I made with some old women and young women.

For the men, I don’t really know. I tried asking a few men and they just laughed.

This wrong feminism practised by you Nigerian females go destroy una las las. Feminism is limited to equal rights in the society and workplace only.

Una dey drag am into marriage. The man came to carry you from your Father's house to marry you into his house for God's sake. You both cannot be equal.

He is superior and you have to let him have the final say in the family. Even God approves it that way.

Even if you are working, it doesn't mean you should not let your husband the Head of your home or make you become toxic towards men in the society/workplace.

WhatCanIsay:


Wow, you really want to take it that far??

I was even thinking I was talking to someone that has a bit of a human being in him.

You really want to stand on what you just spewed now?

You know the truth so why bother?

Too many broken marriages, and will get worse cos we all disregarded God's simple instruction, as contained in the Bible, guiding marriage. Rather than work hard towards alignment, we put concerted effort towards deliberately questioning it and then making our own rules. The results are obvious to us. Our uneducated parents were wiser and happier.

MNDY:


This wrong feminism practised by you Nigerian females go destroy una las las. Feminism is limited to equal rights in the society and workplace only.

Una dey drag am into marriage. The man came to carry you from your Father's house to marry you into his house for God's sake. You both cannot be equal.

He is superior and you have to let him have the final say in the family. Even God approves it that way.

Even if you are working, it doesn't mean you should not let your husband the Head of your home or make you become toxic towards men in the society/workplace.

I don’t see how my post is related to feminism in the first place

Don27tiky:
what the Bible said is a fact. God configured man to be different in every aspect. That’s why you hardly see women inventors. Women are naturally created to depend on men.

Lol so if women are naturally created to depend on men, why are you men complaining about spending money on women? Why are you men always complaining that women don’t want to contribute financially to the household?

LOL, make una no confuse una self abeg

Don27tiky:
what the Bible said is a fact. God configured man to be different in every aspect. That’s why you hardly see women inventors. Women are naturally created to depend on men.

it doesnt matter what the bible says

Not everyone use the bible a guidance like you

who dont judge people using the bible 1st know what principles do they use and judge them according to thier principles than yours

What about women of olden days that were educated and they were able to stay in their marriage. To be sincere wit you the way God design marriage irrespective of race or religion is for women to be in absolute submissions to men but nowadays things have change no women want to be control again hence high rate of divorce

Get married when you are TRULY ready and not because it’s the next item on your checklist. Date well, fall in love and get married. Simple but a lot of people can’t follow this.
Marriage is better when you marry the right person who you’re compatible with physically, emotionally, personality wise, communication wise and spiritually. That is why you must date for a while regardless of your age.
It’s even best when you marry someone who was a good friend and then things turn romantic later on.
That is because you know the ins and out of the person both the good and the bad.

No matter what, don’t be rushed into getting married. Especially for ladies, don’t let any man rush you. It’s a red flag.
When you see a red flag, run, marriage won’t make it better.

ZIMDRILL:


it doesnt matter what the bible says

Not everyone use the bible a guidance like you

who dont judge people using the bible 1st know what principles do they use and judge them according to thier principles than yours

okay let’s leave the Bible then. Men make this world comfortable for us to leave in. We will start seeing them as equals with the men when they start contributing to development of this world. They must not wait to be given opportunities before they make impact. Many men do against all odds

smile11s:


You know the truth so why bother?

My dear, you will understand something about your website very soon.

If you are not intelligent enough to develop your contents, it's necessary you learn the hard way.

Vermins like you need lessons once awhile.

Marriage is not for mere men..
It's for gods...

Don27tiky:
okay let’s leave the Bible then. Men make this world comfortable for us to leave in. We will start seeing them as equals with the men when they start contributing to development of this world. They must not wait to be given opportunities before they make impact. Many men do against all odds

You are missing the picture, its not like women are saying they want to like physical like men or taking over men in what they do

there are point out at things that disadvantage them(things men you to sideline women) therefore women dont progress to the highest level like their male counterpart for a example, i gave the Saudi Arabia women started to be allowed to drive recently as 2018, or an employer wouldnt hire a woman becoz at one point to give birth and be on maternity leave. Eg a woman not being promoted simply becoz she is married (one having a self belief that a married woman wont the able to meet the job requirement eg travelling and spending time away from her family). One has to decide for herself and not give a chance based on one's self belief or culture or tradition. Eg is it fair, your parents build their home together then your father dies, this relatives grab the house from your mother becoz a woman is not entitled to her husband's property. All those examples are rights women are fighting for in different parts of the world


So when they say equal rights they simply mean give us the same opportunities just like men aka dont say a woman shouldnt do this becoz of her gender

rosey11:
Get married when you are TRULY ready and not because it’s the next item on your checklist. Date well, fall in love and get married. Simple but a lot of people can’t follow this.
Marriage is better when you marry the right person who you’re compatible with physically, emotionally, personality wise, communication wise and spiritually. That is why you must date for a while regardless of your age.
It’s even best when you marry someone who was a good friend and then things turn romantic later on.
That is because you know the ins and out of the person both the good and the bad.

No matter what, don’t be rushed into getting married. Especially for ladies, don’t let any man rush you. It’s a red flag.
When you see a red flag, run, marriage won’t make it better.

One of my biggest regrets is that I felt dating was a sin..... that dating was a sin. That dating isn't found in the bible..... that only outright marriage is found in the bible..... I regret it.

ZIMDRILL:


You are missing the picture, its not like women are saying they want to like physical like men or taking over men in what they do

there are point out at things that disadvantage them(things men you to sideline women) therefore women dont progress to the highest level like their male counterpart for a example, i gave the Saudi Arabia women started to be allowed to drive recently as 2018, or an employer wouldnt hire a woman becoz at one point to give birth and be on maternity leave.

When comes to role of women men sometimes we under estimate their role but let me make you realise the effect or the role they play in human development, mothers play a huge role in development of child hence mostly a child learns early to call the mother "MUM" and then why most men are very protective of their mothers its the role they play in raising them (kids)

So when they say equal rights they simply mean give us the same opportunities just like men aka dont say a woman shouldnt do this becoz of her gender

exactly my point. Women should not have equal rights with men. The world was a better place when women were playing their role as women and now that they want and are playing the role of men, things are going bad. Believe me that’s what will end up destroying this world

Don27tiky:
exactly my point. Women should not have equal rights with men. The world was a better place when women were playing their role as women and now that they want and are playing the role of men, things are going bad. Believe me that’s what will end up destroying this world

well we see the world differently lets agree on that

WhatCanIsay:


My dear, you will understand something about your website very soon.

If you are not intelligent enough to develop your contents, it's necessary you learn the hard way.

Vermins like you need lessons once awhile.

No wahala

Exactly. You've said it all. No addition nor subtraction.

ZIMDRILL:


Feminism is not the problem, Feminism never advocates for divorce but for equall rights were women are treated less or blocked to progress because one is a woman

Feminism differ from country to country, and in every country's culture and religion, eg a woman in Qatar feminism to them was the right to drive cars like men, then in nigeria it might mean to be treated equally with men in boardroom eg 7 boad members and 1 is woman she is being expected to serve tea to others simple becoz she is a woman by virtue

Feminism simply means equal rights mostly in work places or woman's development without being disadvantaged

The problem with high broken marriages is simply becoz women are now able to provide for themselves they nolonger fear to be alone becoz she able to provide for herself. Remember her family sent to her school to be educated and to be able to work one day

So now dynamics have changed where men have lost the control in the family as both are now breadwinners. am 46 our mothers were disadvantage becoz most either never went to school or went half way were simply housewives and our father would abuse their wives becoz they knew that they can not provide for themselves they would rather tolerate abuse than being shamed as divorcee and not able to have their own income

Now things have changed, it hard to abuse someone who has her own source of income they would just walk away

Most women are either becoming abuser just like their fathers or correcting the mistakes of their mothers by not accepting abuse of resource to control someone from leaving the marriage, so instead of staying for the sake of marriage to be called Mrs its a none starter for them they rather leave

Then for men we are also stuck in the past were think we can manipulate our wives like our father used to do forgetting that these two women aka our mothers and our present wives are different as in our wives are also educated just like us and a higher % are working bring income in the house compared to our mother who were educated to primary 7 and were just housewives, a big disadvantage to them, their were prone to financial
abuse etc

As men we dont see the rights women are fighting for simply becoz we benefiting more from current setting that disadvantages women then on the other hand women are misusing feminism especially in family homes or set up to settle scores

ZIMDRILL:


Feminism is not the problem, Feminism never advocates for divorce but for equall rights were women are treated less or blocked to progress because one is a woman

Feminism differ from country to country, and in every country's culture and religion, eg a woman in Qatar feminism to them was the right to drive cars like men, then in nigeria it might mean to be treated equally with men in boardroom eg 7 boad members and 1 is woman she is being expected to serve tea to others simple becoz she is a woman by virtue

Feminism simply means equal rights mostly in work places or woman's development without being disadvantaged

The problem with high broken marriages is simply becoz women are now able to provide for themselves they nolonger fear to be alone becoz she able to provide for herself. Remember her family sent to her school to be educated and to be able to work one day

So now dynamics have changed where men have lost the control in the family as both are now breadwinners. am 46 our mothers were disadvantage becoz most either never went to school or went half way were simply housewives and our father would abuse their wives becoz they knew that they can not provide for themselves they would rather tolerate abuse than being shamed as divorcee and not able to have their own income

Now things have changed, it hard to abuse someone who has her own source of income they would just walk away

Most women are either becoming abuser just like their fathers or correcting the mistakes of their mothers by not accepting abuse of resource to control someone from leaving the marriage, so instead of staying for the sake of marriage to be called Mrs its a none starter for them they rather leave

Then for men we are also stuck in the past were think we can manipulate our wives like our father used to do forgetting that these two women aka our mothers and our present wives are different as in our wives are also educated just like us and a higher % are working bring income in the house compared to our mother who were educated to primary 7 and were just housewives, a big disadvantage to them, their were prone to financial
abuse etc

As men we dont see the rights women are fighting for simply becoz we benefiting more from current setting that disadvantages women then on the other hand women are misusing feminism especially in family homes or set up to settle scores

Big round of applause for you! Very well said!

ZIMDRILL:


ok lets take that also a point

but dont you also think that women were trapped by virtue of not being also breadwinner? He who controls your finance control you and if they say jump you say ask how high?

Most women of the old generation tolerated abuse becoz they had no were to go aka without your own income you are trapped, society lookeddown on divorces, your own parents would sent you back if your husband is an abuser etc

I'll explain it like this

There are generally 2 kinds of women who evolve from these kind of situations where their mother was abused - the one who works hard and the one who looks for shortcuts

The hardworking woman saw her mother go through control and abuse from her father, and she promised herself that she'll never go through what her mother went through. She knows that her mother was powerless because she depended on her father for money. So she works hard and earns a living for herself. Any man who dare tries to control or abuse her gets cut off instantly

The other woman who looks for shortcuts saw her mother get abused but still, she looks for men who are controlling and abusive. She's repeating the cycle of abuse. Maybe because she feels she doesn't deserve any better. Maybe because she doesn't know how to work hard and earn. Maybe because those abusive and controlling men feel familiar and comfortable. Either way, she goes after bad boys and rich men with money and doesn't mind the abuse and control

bepositive11:


I'll explain it like this

There are generally 2 kinds of women who evolve from these kind of situations where their mother was abused - the one who works hard and the one who looks for shortcuts

The hardworking woman saw her mother go through control and abuse from her father, and she promised herself that she'll never go through what her mother went through. She knows that her mother was powerless because she depended on her father for money. So she works hard and earns a living for herself. Any man who dare tries to control or abuse her gets cut off instantly

The other woman who looks for shortcuts saw her mother get abused but still, she looks for men who are controlling and abusive. She's repeating the cycle of abuse. Maybe because she feels she doesn't deserve any better. Maybe because she doesn't know how to work hard and earn. Maybe because those abusive and controlling men feel familiar and comfortable. Either way, she goes after bad boys and rich men with money and doesn't mind the abuse and control

You nailed it

ZIMDRILL:


You nailed it

I wonder though why some women choose to work hard and prevent abuse while other women choose to walk the same path of their mothers and end up getting abused

Do you have any thoughts on this?

bepositive11:


I wonder though why some women choose to work hard and prevent abuse while other women choose to walk the same path of their mothers and end up getting abused

Do you have any thoughts on this?

there is no clear answer as every woman's journey to marriage is different and how she was raised play a part in how the thinks sees life and finally how she adpots to the new life

BigBashiru:


And marriage does not cage a man financially??

It does cage a man financially.

ZIMDRILL:


there is no clear answer as every woman's journey to marriage is different and how she was raised play a part in how the thinks sees life and finally how she adpots to the new life

Yes, I get that.

I'm saying that those women who see their mothers get abused by their fathers, I wonder why some daughters promise themselves not to go through the same while other daughters repeat the abuse cycle by getting married to abusive men like their fathers

I guess you don't see a clear answer like myself

Even men, some end up becoming abusive like their fathers while others promise themselves to never abuse their wives like their father abused their mom

I guess there really is no clear answer..

Simran94:


Lol so if women are naturally created to depend on men, why are you men complaining about spending money on women? Why are you men always complaining that women don’t want to contribute financially to the household?

LOL, make una no confuse una self abeg

Lmao

bepositive11:


Yes, I get that.

I'm saying that those women who see their mothers get abused by their fathers, I wonder why some daughters promise themselves not to go through the same while other daughters repeat the abuse cycle by getting married to abusive men like their fathers

I guess you don't see a clear answer like myself

Even men, some end up becoming abusive like their fathers while others promise themselves to never abuse their wives like their father abused their mom

I guess there really is no clear answer..

Some become like their mothers and fathers becoz thats only way they know (remember we learn alot from parents than what we think) hence you find both men and women we always want our wives/husbands to be like our parents. You here someone saying i want you do it this way becoz thats how my mother does it

ZIMDRILL:


Some become like their mothers and fathers becoz thats only way they know (remember we learn alot from parents than what we think) hence you find both men and women we always want our wives/husbands to be like our parents. You here someone saying i want you do it this way becoz thats how my mother does it

That's true. Men and women who grew up with abusive mothers or fathers need to consciously avoid people who are like their parents, if not they'll end up with partners like their parents. Since people like their parents feel familiar, they're subconsciously attracted to them. It takes conscious effort to recognise and break that attachment

They themselves also need to change the bad behaviours that they learned from their parents. That too takes conscious effort