sukkot:
touche

Glad you realize it.

Descottes:
I've missed you Sha. You were always on my mind
I kept thinking about how close we'd have been if not for that hulabaloo that broke our blossoming friendship.

.Lovers day approach.

I think i look god too and its very annoying.

I am also very friendly and hardworking.

I got to my organization and got promoted in less than 2 years ahead of those i met there have been on the same level for 4 and more years.

They think i get this stuffs by my good looks, but does not know i take all my time to read, study the organization and come up with solutions that end up working for the organization. I have also spent a tone of money on the right certifications and all.

Even in the society, there are mixed feelings, some just hate you for looking good even though you didn't create yourself, while others also show love and compliment and expect you to respond in a certain way and they call you rude if you don't meet their expectations.

The only one solution is I DO NOT CARE! If you like and compliment me, i thank you and move on, if you say bad things to me, i smile and move on!

Descottes:
Who looks epp? As I handsome reach I'm still depressed.
People see me and assume I live a very happy and sweet life, when in truth, my world is dark and gloomy

there is a hole in your soul that is crying to be filled up. you need to reconnect to your higher self. thats the only time you will find peace joy and happiness irrespective of your location. CONNECT TO YOUR HIGHER SELF. SEEK FROM WITHIN AND RECONNECT TO THE god THAT IS IN YOU

Kobojunkie:
Glad you realize it.

so you reckon seeing a shrink will help OP ? are there any good shrinks in nigeria ? or you reckon mummy GO can psychoanalyze him better ?

Pictures or i dont believe it

Descottes:
Who looks epp? As I handsome reach I'm still depressed.
People see me and assume I live a very happy and sweet life, when in truth, my world is dark and gloomy

I wish you happiness...stay safe

you no get problem bros

You don't fine pass me, forget it.

henrybangs44:
I'm a natural confident guy because our mom taught us to be hard working and earn everything through the rice process. She never allowed us take advantage of situations or people and never look down on anybody.

We are naturally good looking in our family and people always talk about how we are all fine in the house. As a result, almost 70% of conversations we have with people will end up discussing what our parents are giving us that are making us fresh and fine.

But our mom did not like people talking to us that way. She did not teach us how to react to compliments and we are very uneasy whenever this topic comes up in our discussions. I don't even see my self that good looking as people are saying.

I work hard to earn everything the right way, and I'm highly productive but anytime a colleague or team mate talks about my appearance I just lose confidence. I have left a lot of groups and teams because of this. When people start talking to me about it I just don't feel comfortable.

I have a lot of girls and I know I worked hard to get them. But they keep telling me it's just my looks that's giving me their attention without stress but I don't believe that, I believe I work hard to get them.

This is beginning to affect my work. Some people don't believe I got to where I am because of hard work. I have worked so hard and I don't want to be throwing things away simply because of this.

For the fine boys and girls in the house, pls how do you handle compliments without appearing proud and egotistical? How do you handle it without being weird?

This is exactly the major reason I refused going into modeling. U become objectified or over dependent or narrowed down or attached to ur looks.

To me it’s disgusting.

Just take the compliments as any normal compliment and allow them to gush or express themselves bt always remind urself and them by ur interactions that u are more than just looks and it doesn’t mean anything.

Also tone down on ur detailing ur looks so u blend in better.

Legalcriminal:
Post your picture make we confirm before we know the solution to your confidence

I was going to say this. Post your photo, hunny!!!

henrybangs44:
I'm a natural confident guy because our mom taught us to be hard working and earn everything through the rice process. She never allowed us take advantage of situations or people and never look down on anybody.

We are naturally good looking in our family and people always talk about how we are all fine in the house. As a result, almost 70% of conversations we have with people will end up discussing what our parents are giving us that are making us fresh and fine.

But our mom did not like people talking to us that way. She did not teach us how to react to compliments and we are very uneasy whenever this topic comes up in our discussions. I don't even see my self that good looking as people are saying.

I work hard to earn everything the right way, and I'm highly productive but anytime a colleague or team mate talks about my appearance I just lose confidence. I have left a lot of groups and teams because of this. When people start talking to me about it I just don't feel comfortable.

I have a lot of girls and I know I worked hard to get them. But they keep telling me it's just my looks that's giving me their attention without stress but I don't believe that, I believe I work hard to get them.

This is beginning to affect my work. Some people don't believe I got to where I am because of hard work. I have worked so hard and I don't want to be throwing things away simply because of this.

For the fine boys and girls in the house, pls how do you handle compliments without appearing proud and egotistical? How do you handle it without being weird?

Post your picture I want to confirm something

Omo na really women dey raise children, the man na just image for the son to emulate and head for the daughters to rub lol
Omo just say thank you or if you get energy throw your own compliment back, make it outrageous so cruise would be caught well by both parties

sukkot:
so you reckon seeing a shrink will help OP ? are there any good shrinks in nigeria ? or you reckon mummy GO can psychoanalyze him better ?

Mummy GO'S shrinks don finish with her and her own problems?

Nothing wrong with seeing a shrink. Many of those you like to idolize probably have and see one regularly. If Op is serious about improving his quality of living, then that is what I suggest. Otherwise, it is levels hard working to improve one's self-esteem without some professional help.

All this and OP likely resembles a baboon’s shriveled butt. Believe there are attractive Nairalanders at your peril.

jaxxy:
This is exactly the major reason I refused going into modeling. U become objectified or over dependent or narrowed down or attached to ur looks.

To me it’s disgusting.

Just take the compliments as any normal compliment and allow them to gush or express themselves bt always remind urself and them by ur interactions that u are more than just looks and it doesn’t mean anything.

Also tone down on ur detailing ur looks so u blend in better.

What in the world are you talking about? There are so many talented good-looking individuals out there who are seen not just for their looks bit also also talents.

Look out there at good-looking actors and actresses, models, musicians etc., who have over and over shown the world that beauty can also come accompanied with brains and brawns.

Don't use your personal issues to shade the world abeg.

Kobojunkie:
Mummy GO'S shrinks don finish with her and her own problems?

Nothing wrong with seeing a shrink. Many of those you like to idolize probably have and see one regularly. If Op is serious about improving his quality of living, then that is what I suggest. Otherwise, it is levels hard working to improve one's self-esteem without some professional help.

its a good question

We are all wired differently but completely extricating yourself from a stressor is definitely not the way to go. I also find it strange that you are indirectly blaming your mother which begs my next question. How old are you?

I am going to chalk up this whole situation of yours as being part of your emotional and neurodevelopmental growth towards maturity. It can happen to anyone. I can fondly remember mine been not wanting anyone to notice me so I shied away from any crowd like markets, churches etc. Now, let's just say I demand to be noticed all the time.

You will get past this. Chin up

Descottes:
so many things my dear. I'm a weirdo and a loner– I don't have much friends and I don't wish to.
I see life very differently from how other people see it, which makes me question whether I was supposed to be born here in this God forsaken shithole at all.
I hate everything about here. And I'll definitely leave to find a life somewhere else.. with you probably

I was in this mental sphere some time back. You're not weird. You're just not like everybody else and that's okay. Let's talk.

Descottes:
Who looks epp? As I handsome reach I'm still depressed.
People see me and assume I live a very happy and sweet life, when in truth, my world is dark and gloomy

May the good Lord brighten your world.

Kobojunkie:
What in the world are you talking about? There are so many talented good-looking individuals out there who are seen not just for their looks bit also also talents.

Don't use your personal issues to shade the world abeg.

If u read what I wrote I said when u go into modeling the tendency is high especially if u are shallow minded, not that it happens to all fine people.

Post your picture.


Some people are called fine when they are wor wor


quote author=henrybangs44 post=109988028]I'm a natural confident guy because our mom taught us to be hard working and earn everything through the rice process. She never allowed us take advantage of situations or people and never look down on anybody.

We are naturally good looking in our family and people always talk about how we are all fine in the house. As a result, almost 70% of conversations we have with people will end up discussing what our parents are giving us that are making us fresh and fine.

But our mom did not like people talking to us that way. She did not teach us how to react to compliments and we are very uneasy whenever this topic comes up in our discussions. I don't even see my self that good looking as people are saying.

I work hard to earn everything the right way, and I'm highly productive but anytime a colleague or team mate talks about my appearance I just lose confidence. I have left a lot of groups and teams because of this. When people start talking to me about it I just don't feel comfortable.

I have a lot of girls and I know I worked hard to get them. But they keep telling me it's just my looks that's giving me their attention without stress but I don't believe that, I believe I work hard to get them.

This is beginning to affect my work. Some people don't believe I got to where I am because of hard work. I have worked so hard and I don't want to be throwing things away simply because of this.

For the fine boys and girls in the house, pls how do you handle compliments without appearing proud and egotistical? How do you handle it without being weird? [/quote]

Go to Togo

Descottes:
so many things my dear. I'm a weirdo and a loner– I don't have much friends and I don't wish to.
I see life very differently from how other people see it, which makes me question whether I was supposed to be born here in this God forsaken shithole at all.
I hate everything about here. And I'll definitely leave to find a life somewhere else.. with you probably

jaxxy:
If u read what I wrote I said when u go into modeling the tendency is high especially if u are shallow minded, not that it happens to all fine people.

Am I the only one that sees that Indeed a shallow minded individual is likely one who has no other talents in this case and would hence be somehow correctly "objectified" in that case?

Kobojunkie:
Am I the only one that sees that Indeed a shallow minded individual is likely one who has no other talents in this case and would hence be somehow correctly "objectified" in that case?

Many shallow minded people don’t know they are shallow until they get into the right situation to expose it.

Some are shallow when it comes to money and some beauty basically until u are faced with the test b4 it becomes revealed how shallow u are.

I'm also in the OP's category... And I'm struggling to get a girl, they all think will cheat on them meanwhile I do not even have friends, and I so hate it when they say I'm a fine guy cos I don't believe it,I feel there more handsome guys than me out there...

A whole lot of things happens just because u're a fine person and it is sometimes hard on us, but no one ever understand because the whole world thinks we can get everything on a platter of gold

Lilcraze:
I'm also in the OP's category... And I'm struggling to get a girl, they all think will cheat on them meanwhile I do not even have friends, and I so hate it when they say I'm a fine guy cos I don't believe it,I feel there more handsome guys than me out there...

A whole lot of things happens just because u're a fine person and it is sometimes hard on us, but no one ever understand because the whole world thinks we can get everything on a platter of gold

from my experience, it isn't always true that we have no friends but instead that we do not have as friends those individuals whose friendship we crave. It isn't always true that we can't get the girl but instead that we do not have for ourself that particular girl we are fixated/obsessed with.

Please ignore the gals and work instead on your self-esteem abeg!

The reason you think the way you do is you have been conditioned to believing only a handful are beautiful.

Kobojunkie:
from my experience, it isn't always true that we have no friends but instead that we do not have as friends those individuals whose friendship we crave. It isn't always true that we can't get the girl but instead that we do not have for ourself that particular girl we are fixated/obsessed with.

Please ignore the gals and work instead on your self-esteem abeg!

The reason you think the way you do is you have been conditioned to believing only a handful are beautiful.

What I don't understand is why isn't our God given beauty not building our self-esteem... I know a whole lot of people who suffer this too

henrybangs44:
I'm a natural confident guy because our mom taught us to be hard working and earn everything through the rice process. She never allowed us take advantage of situations or people and never look down on anybody.

We are naturally good looking in our family and people always talk about how we are all fine in the house. As a result, almost 70% of conversations we have with people will end up discussing what our parents are giving us that are making us fresh and fine.

But our mom did not like people talking to us that way. She did not teach us how to react to compliments and we are very uneasy whenever this topic comes up in our discussions. I don't even see my self that good looking as people are saying.

I work hard to earn everything the right way, and I'm highly productive but anytime a colleague or team mate talks about my appearance I just lose confidence. I have left a lot of groups and teams because of this. When people start talking to me about it I just don't feel comfortable.

I have a lot of girls and I know I worked hard to get them. But they keep telling me it's just my looks that's giving me their attention without stress but I don't believe that, I believe I work hard to get them.

This is beginning to affect my work. Some people don't believe I got to where I am because of hard work. I have worked so hard and I don't want to be throwing things away simply because of this.

For the fine boys and girls in the house, pls how do you handle compliments without appearing proud and egotistical? How do you handle it without being weird?

We are 8 in the house. Fortunately we are all very fine to the core. The girls are very pretty and the guys are not just fine but clean to the sole of their feet. Unfortunately we were from a poor home and this drove us all into the street early to hussle. This drove that attitude ur passing through right now away from us. Now we are all grown and doing well.

Complements don't mean shiiit to any of us. The moment u start complimenting any one of us, we shift because we know ur trying to soften us, inorder to get into our head.
It's one thing to be born looking sweet and all that, but it's another thing to be street wise.

Summary of all, u fucccking need to grow up and learn to deal with shit when the come along. Keep ur hands clean always and pretend not to hear compliments when they come. Always stand ur ground when they come and be quick to change the conversation. It will pass a massage to such person that ur not interested in that conversation...period!!!

I come in peace.

Lilcraze:
What I don't understand is why isn't our God given beauty not building our self-esteem... I know a whole lot of people who suffer this too

Beauty and self-esteem are two different constructs. The one is dependent on perception and is only skin deep, whereas the other is mental and defines the self.

Have you never met an ugly man with seriously high self esteem? Look at a person like obasanjo or many of your Nigerian politicians with confidence levels and egos shooting them all over your screens?

Mine is that I don’t like being on the spotlight.
I will give you all the support you need in this life to succeed but put me in front to perform the same magic and I will fumble big time.

That’s why I don’t like people hovering over my shoulder when I do my work; be it supervision or assessment, I will mess things up. I’d rather you allow me do my things then assess me when I’m done.

I literally taught myself how to drive because I can’t stand someone monitoring me.

henrybangs44:
I'm a natural confident guy because our mom taught us to be hard working and earn everything through the rice process. She never allowed us take advantage of situations or people and never look down on anybody.

We are naturally good looking in our family and people always talk about how we are all fine in the house. As a result, almost 70% of conversations we have with people will end up discussing what our parents are giving us that are making us fresh and fine.

But our mom did not like people talking to us that way. She did not teach us how to react to compliments and we are very uneasy whenever this topic comes up in our discussions. I don't even see my self that good looking as people are saying.

I work hard to earn everything the right way, and I'm highly productive but anytime a colleague or team mate talks about my appearance I just lose confidence. I have left a lot of groups and teams because of this. When people start talking to me about it I just don't feel comfortable.

I have a lot of girls and I know I worked hard to get them. But they keep telling me it's just my looks that's giving me their attention without stress but I don't believe that, I believe I work hard to get them.

This is beginning to affect my work. Some people don't believe I got to where I am because of hard work. I have worked so hard and I don't want to be throwing things away simply because of this.

For the fine boys and girls in the house, pls how do you handle compliments without appearing proud and egotistical? How do you handle it without being weird?

picture or idonbelivit.