As 4 me i usually tell the guy 2 his face that it's over. Have been in a relationship 4 four yrs and i got the message that he did not want 2 go out wit me anymore by his not calling and even when i called he will always promise 2 call back bt i finally got the msg. so i think the best way 2 break up a r/ship is by nt calling. Period.

The direct approach is always the best. Break ups are one of the hardest things to deal with. The pain will be there regardless of how one breaks up but you can minimize the pain by letting the other know in the most sincere way what went wrong in the relationship, in the nicest possible way. That way, the person can move on and not repeat the same mistake again in the next relationship.

Do not avoid the person (unless s/he does not get it and keeps coming back thinking s/he can change your mind), or make up an excuse or be rude by leading them sexually and then leave them, that is big time rejection and not to mention the double message you are sending him/her. Know exactly what you want and do not come back once you have expressed you are through.

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I am in the same situation.

I have been in this relationship for a couple of years.  The first year had been OK, but since the beginning of the second year, I started to feel not being able to imagine sharing bed or even house with this man.  It has been a year already that I have been thinking about ending this close relationship and remain only distance friendship, so that I could find someone new.  I still don't know how to make a clear cut on this.  From time to time we are still together (but we don't live together).   I don't have enough guts to say thing straight on his face that I am not in love,  the worse thing is, actually, I have never been in love with him because of his attitude and, sometimes, bad personality, and above all, I don't trust him for some reason.

I want to move on without having him as the agenda in my life that blocks me from moving on, but I am too weak to say it directly.  I am thinking about just getting vanish,  no reply on either phone or email.  Is this considered bad manner?

babe, you dont have to vanish, just break the ice to him and walk away!!!!

walk up to the person and tell him or her real reasons why you want to call it quits (break up). It is up to the person to accept it or not. Do not be too harsh. It is going to be painful at that moment but since you are convinced, just go ahead. This will save both parties of pains in the future thinking u never married each other.

denny4ril:

walk up to the person and tell him or her real reasons why you want to call it quits (break up). It is up to the person to accept it or not. Do not be too harsh. It is going to be painful at that moment but since you are convinced, just go ahead. This will save both parties of pains in the future thinking u never married each other.

Hmmm, nice advice.