Good morning you all. I will be straight and factual, the essence of this thread is to check mate if you even doing better at your age, before depression Kill someone, somewhere.

I’m in my thirty’s, single with no kids or intention to, every morning I think about my life, I stay induce, to stay happy daily. I felt I’m not doing enough for myself at early 30s. It’s a shame to even think I will be forced to get married one day, cos to me getting married at this time means, giving up on the dream and goals, this country is so wreck you can’t chase both if you lack solid back up.
I served 2019, no work since then, than side hustle, I manage to have a plot of land and an uncompleted apartment stalked at %70 completion. I’ve tried many business, it all died. Little amount can’t run business no more.

If it keeps going on this way, which I pray, it won’t, but just for the sanity of others in my shoe, is it advisable to get married, even when you don’t know where and when your next meal is coming from. Every side hustle have a peak and fall point.

I’m worried, I’ve over think myself, I really don’t know where people get courage to get married at all cost.
Just last night, I called mum to check after her, I was shocked when she told me she’s about calling me to tell me, a boy (my nephew) who was barely 10yrs old when I left house, has just come to inform her that his wife just born. I was so shocked, cos he’s about 21yrs. He was happy and yet running around for money, cos they needed 210k to get the wife out.

Where is that courage coming from? I’m I selfish or just don’t want to come to terms with the reality ? I don’t know, almost all my friends are getting married. I’m not tripping, but I just detest and hate going for wedding functions, if I had to go to one, I had to stay induce. I currently, felt love is for the folks at 20s, cos I don’t have any LOL at the moment, no matter how you try, I will still find fault.

I give up on relationship, religion, education and lastly this country.

Complaining about your life will not take you any further. Just be positive, take up easy to get jobs and move on with life.

My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

Hmm mm .... Ur own better you get uncompleted building of 70% completion
Some of your mate are dead and in the prison, but you reasons all does ones....sha its ur life .


My advice in any situation give Thanks to Jah


Life No get manual so enjoy every bit of the journey before you depart mother Earth.

Staying induced to be happy is cool,we all there. Buying your first house with a wife @40 is still a Boss move.
Don't let people rush you with their timeline

Peace081:
[s]My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener[/s]

Op no matter what you smoke please don't heed to this ru.bbish.

But when you jump in no turning back. U have to be positively minded indefinitely.

U can't Afford to be pessimistic, give room for doubt, depression or whatever. U will not list to what the bad news daily and what the economy is saying.

Peace081:
My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

Super stories

Oga it's not advisable oo... Don't wait till ur son or daughter will tell u one day say... Daddy what were u doing when ur mates where busy working What will u tell him or her Try to get something doing first with something coming in as income..

Peace081:
My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

dem be carpenter!!! Which kain door opener nao

No one puts a gun to a man head to go and get married, if they say 'go and marry like your mates'... Tell them 'go and die like your mates '

You already have up on a lot of things because life by default is tough.

Do you want to commit suicide when your wife; nag, curse and shame you because you can provide for her and your kid(s)?

If so, get married.

A sensible person should at least be independent (financially), have a job or business, be able to feed an extra stomach before getting married.

If you're not ready, why be pressured? A 21 year old that couldn't pay hospital bills is now who you look up to? Is that life?

This situation should make you think of ways to be financially independent first and not thoughts of marriage.

How you wan pay dowry sef??

PerfectStranger:

Op no matter what you smoke please don't heed to this advise

I was about stoning the poster, but let’s ask him if he was a living testimony to that.

NasoLifeBe!!!

See ehn, u are not alone, After channel ur energy to productive means u forget about love...

Normal! Normal!! na woman suppose dey love man, and to dey form love of my life for us, A man only needs to pick the beautiful and well moral upright lady.

Solution

Try and have a focus, on when u are done chasing fulfilment, u don't need to have everything before u marry,
Forget about love u don grow past those stage, u are too cool down and find a beautiful and high moral value girl.

JoyousFurnitire:
You already have up on a lot of things because life by default is tough.

Do you want to commit suicide when your wife; nag, curse and shame you because you can provide for her and your kid(s)?

If so, get married.

A sensible person should at least be independent (financially), have a job or business, be able to feed


an extra stomach before getting married.

If you're not ready, why be pressured? A 21 year old that couldn't pay hospital bills is now who you look up to? Is that life?

This situation should make you think of ways to be financially independent first and not thoughts of marriage.

How you wan pay dowry sef??

I didn’t mention looking up to anyone, I only sight his case as where people of his type get the courage from. And about getting independent, how do I go about it ?

Peace081:
My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

Only an Idiot gives this kind of advice,and a bigger idiot takes it.

Waytolife:


I didn’t mention looking up to anyone, I only sight his case as where people of his type get the courage from. And about getting independent, how do I go about it ?

First, you're doing your best. Not many of your mates have a landed property. You're doing your best.

Well I believe you have goals. Give it your all with time duration of about a year or two (without distraction especially of the other gender).

Pray if you believe in prayer.

habsydiamond:
dem be carpenter!!! Which kain door opener nao

Person wey no well.

Waytolife:
Good morning you all. I will be straight and factual, the essence of this thread is to check mate if you even doing better at your age, before depression Kill someone, somewhere.

I’m in my thirty’s, single with no kids or intention to every morning I think about my life, I stay induce, to stay happy daily. I felt I’m not doing enough for myself at early 30s. It’s a shame to even think I will be forced to get married one day, cos to me getting married at this time means, giving up on the dream and goals, this country is so wreck you can’t chase both if you lack solid back up.
I served 2019, no work since then, than side hustle, I manage to have a plot of land and an uncompleted apartment stalked at %70 completion. I’ve tried many business, it all died. Little amount can’t run business no more.

If it keeps going on this way, which I pray, it won’t, but just for the sanity of others in my shoe, is it advisable to get married, even when you don’t know where and when your next meal is coming from. Every side hustle have a peak and fall point.

I’m worried, I’ve over think myself, I really don’t know where people get courage to get married at all cost.
Just last night, I called mum to check after her, I was shocked when she told me she’s about calling me to tell me, a boy (my nephew) who was barely 10yrs old when I left house, has just come to inform her that his wife just born. I was so shocked, cos he’s about 21yrs. He was happy and yet running around for money, cos they needed 210k to get the wife out.

Where is that courage coming from? I’m I selfish or just don’t want to come to terms with the reality ? I don’t know, almost all my friends are getting married. I’m not tripping, but I just detest and hate going for wedding functions, if I had to go to one, I had to stay induce. I currently, felt love is for the folks at 20s, cos I don’t have any LOL at the moment, no matter how you try, I will still find fault.

I give up on relationship, religion, education and lastly this country.

@the bolded, makes 2 of us.... Broski, marriage is not an achievement... Be wise sir, don't be conned.

"He was happy and yet running around for money, cos they needed 210k to get the wife out. " ... Why will you chuck edd in This kinda thingy, when you never secure? Smh... Op shey you see weytin local man dey yarn... Don't live your life to please anybody Sir. .. Aii comrade, sayonara.

Tensa20,

We don get new member to the club o

---

Well, OP, there is nothing wrong with you, and trust me, you are not alone in this situation. In fact, there are some people who have planned to undergo vasectomy should they continue to remain in Nigeria. From your narration, some of them are even doing better than you. It is life, and human needs are insatiable. So yes, nothing wrong. One of my male lecturers just got married and dude is in his late 30s. Our lives are way different from women's. With the Nigerian economy further deteriorating, more men will marry late not because of alfa meilism but the economy. Hypergamy is real, and both religion and culture expect the men not women to provide the bulk in family finances and expenses. Also, there are way too many men these days who married late and are enjoying it - Oscar Onyema of the Nigerian Stock Exchange, Razak Okoya, Ned Nwoko, Adams Oshiomole etc. Sure, these men are elites but because they are popular, I decided to use them. Alternatively, look within your circles, the men who plan to marry right not like the 21 year old married pretty late. In summary, nothing do you.

On finances, you need to ask yourself what skill can I offer that will earn me good money and a good life. The Nlder I mentioned earlier has narrated how things were for him before he ventured into tech and is currently living a life he never thought of prior to Covid. Some are lucky they have inheritances or got into good jobs or got funding for further studies abroad. But ensuring you have a stable source of income, whether as a job or business, depends on you. Don't see it as something to do before you marry (which is part of anyway) but something I must do to live a good life for myself. Please yourself first. Can I go out to an upscale restaurant or get good clothes without feeling anything? Can I plan and invest for my retirement? These and many more are as a result of having a good and stable source of income. But first, what can I do to ensure I earn this income? That is the question you need to answer.

Gerrard59:
Tensa20,

We don get new member to the club o

---

Well, OP, there is nothing wrong with you, and trust me, you are not alone in this situation. In fact, there are some people who have planned to undergo vasectomy should they continue to remain in Nigeria. From your narration, some of them are even doing better than you. It is life, and human needs are insatiable. So yes, nothing wrong. One of my male lecturers just got married and dude is in his late 30s. Our lives are way different from women's. With the Nigerian economy further deteriorating, more men will marry late not because of alfa meilism but the economy. Hypergamy is real, and both religion and culture expect the men not women to provide the bulk in family finances and expenses. Also, there are way too many men these days who married late and are enjoying it - Oscar Onyema of the Nigerian Stock Exchange, Razak Okoya, Ned Nwoko, Adams Oshiomole etc. Sure, these men are elites but because they are popular, I decided to use them. Alternatively, look within your circles, the men who plan to marry right not like the 21 year old married pretty late. In summary, nothing do you.

On finances, you need to ask yourself what skill can I offer that will earn me good money and a good life. The Nlder I mentioned earlier has narrated how things were for him before he ventured into tech and is currently living a life he never thought of prior to Covid. Some are lucky they have inheritances or got into good jobs or got funding for further studies abroad. But ensuring you have a stable source of income, whether as a job or business, depends on you. Don't see it as something to do before you marry (which is part of anyway) but something I must do to live a good life for myself. Please yourself first. Can I go out to an upscale restaurant or get good clothes without feeling anything? Can I plan and invest for my retirement? These and many more are as a result of having a good and stable source of income. But first, what can I do to ensure I earn this income? That is the question you need to answer.

Noted
I’m
Doing fine for myself, just don’t know how long, I looking for an improvement in myself tho

That's more like 1billion ways to die

Waytolife:

Noted
I’m
Doing fine for myself, just don’t know how long, I looking for an improvement in myself tho

OK.

Diversify from the current one or use proceeds from the current one to invest in things worth investing. On this one, you have to do your research.

Peace081:
My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

what if e turn worst? Abeg stop this rubbish talk

Peace081:
My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

Empty brain, spitting shit.

Op no matter what you fumes please haven't ignore to this ru

Yes now.. It's cool to get married if you don't know when your next meal will come from... Jesus fasted for forty days n night.. U too will do it, by the time u reach seven days, maybe na ur dead body dem go see

Let's all embrace antinatalism peeps...
There's no moral justification whatever for bringing innocent kids into this harsh..brutal meaningless life...

Robertgreene1:
Let's all embrace antinatalism peeps...
There's no moral justification whatever for bringing innocent kids into this harsh..brutal meaningless life...

Exactly my view, but many have begin to see as irresponsible and selfish, even those we share same opinion have begin to shift table. I can’t wait can date ladies above 25 anymore for my sanity sake.

Waytolife:

Exactly my view, but many have begin to see as irresponsible and selfish, even those we share same opinion have begin to shift table. I can’t wait can date ladies above 25 anymore for my sanity sake.

I'm not in anyway ready for a relationship or kids. But I do ask; 'do we have women that subscribe to antinatalism'?

We could have 'a' kid when we make it 'big'

When I see a lady with such view, I'll marry ASAP

Waytolife:
Good morning you all. I will be straight and factual, the essence of this thread is to check mate if you even doing better at your age, before depression Kill someone, somewhere.

I’m in my thirty’s, single with no kids or intention to, every morning I think about my life, I stay induce, to stay happy daily. I felt I’m not doing enough for myself at early 30s. It’s a shame to even think I will be forced to get married one day, cos to me getting married at this time means, giving up on the dream and goals, this country is so wreck you can’t chase both if you lack solid back up.
I served 2019, no work since then, than side hustle, I manage to have a plot of land and an uncompleted apartment stalked at %70 completion. I’ve tried many business, it all died. Little amount can’t run business no more.

If it keeps going on this way, which I pray, it won’t, but just for the sanity of others in my shoe, is it advisable to get married, even when you don’t know where and when your next meal is coming from. Every side hustle have a peak and fall point.

I’m worried, I’ve over think myself, I really don’t know where people get courage to get married at all cost.
Just last night, I called mum to check after her, I was shocked when she told me she’s about calling me to tell me, a boy (my nephew) who was barely 10yrs old when I left house, has just come to inform her that his wife just born. I was so shocked, cos he’s about 21yrs. He was happy and yet running around for money, cos they needed 210k to get the wife out.

Where is that courage coming from? I’m I selfish or just don’t want to come to terms with the reality ? I don’t know, almost all my friends are getting married. I’m not tripping, but I just detest and hate going for wedding functions, if I had to go to one, I had to stay induce. I currently, felt love is for the folks at 20s, cos I don’t have any LOL at the moment, no matter how you try, I will still find fault.

I give up on relationship, religion, education and lastly this country.

Your not alone brother

Peace081:
My dear get married n u will see ur life turn around for good, some women are door opener

He should just marry? What if he doesn't have even little amount to pay basic items for marriage? What if he can't afford house rent (if he is not staying in free apartment)? What if he is jobless and doesn't have any money to start a small business or buy equipment if he is an artisan?
Please don't advise somebody's son to enslave somebody's daughter or to impregnate her and run away.