| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Bbbw: 4:25pm On May 03, 2022 |
Yeah |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Gmajor(m): 4:36pm On May 03, 2022 |
what is stoppinng you from mentioning the name of the company? |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by yongg: 4:54pm On May 03, 2022 |
Kisico:
Three days ago I received an sms from a company where I dropped my C.V close to two years ago. I went through it and low and behold, it was an invitation for an interview yesterday being Saturday. I was happy really. I prepared well for it, cancelled my supplying business appointment. I do a supplying business while looking forward to a good job opportunity. So, I woke up quite early dressed up and left for the venue. I got there around 8:10am while the interview was scheduled to hold by 9:00am.
I got to the venue and met two persons who was there for the same reason. Before it was 8:50am the whole place was filled up with others who also came for the same interview.
Finally, the interview that was scheduled to hold by 9:00am started around 11:30am. It then got to my turn, I went in and met three persons in there, one man and two young ladies. Then the man started the interviewing questions and I was giving out an impressive answers, while one of the ladies tried asking me a question, the man now cut in and ask, ' by the way, are you married'? I answered, 'no, I'm single sir'. He then asked again, ' were you married before'? I paused for a while and was wondering if it will be proper to let it out exactly the way it is. Then I decided to come out plain and answered that I was married, and I tried adding to it that I left because of a case of domestic violence, but he didn't want to hear that at all, so, he immediately cut in and said, 'young lady there's no need going ahead with anything else again since you couldn't manage to stay back and remain married, is it the company that you can be able to manage'. At this point, even the two ladies were more than astonished at him than I was. He ended it and said, 'Just forget about the job'. I just left feeling so devastated.
I managed to hold back tears till I got home and nearly cried my eyes out, recalling all that I went through. It's really sad that some people feel they can throw words anyhow at others not minding what those words are doing to their emotions.
Left for me, who ever that interviewer was male or female... That person had no right to judge without intricate details in a deeply personal matter. Why didn't you query him? With questions such as Is he saying there is no circumstance under which domestic violence occurs that necessitates any of the partners in a marriage leaving? Would he retain a partnership with another business entity if the business entity he is in partnership with was conducting business in a way that undermined and antagonized the said partnership, too much to overlook? How much harm would he have loved to suffer? If he is free to make comments like "cut losses" as an expression of how much he is willing to risk in a venture, why is he now concerned in a venture of intimacy which is personal to you for which he has no documents to measure emotional metrics involved... That man can be sued for that ad hominem comment because your marital partnership should have nothing to do with that interview process. If it does, he should prove it in court. Sue them, even when you don't win. They will suffer the trouble of not controlling their tongue or apologizing after a wrong has been pointed out. I think you should sue that man, you don't even have to win. Find a lawyer and discourage that behavior. What impetus does he have to make that judgement based on limited information. Information you are uncomfortable with sharing because it's a private matter. Discourage that nonsense behaviour and stop it from spreading and hurting another human bold enough to cut losses and walk away from domestic violence which no one should have to endure longer than necessary. Find a lawyer and sue. That interview would have instantly turned to his interview. And I would have demanded his apology that instant and probably still sue because there is no way to prove you would have given me the job if the issue of the marital circumstance didn't come up if I really wanted that job. That anyone has an opinion is ok, it's allowed. But you will have to check yourself if you will be importing that opinion to unnecessarily judge a job competence that has nothing to do with a circumstances probably beyond your control or an obvious compromise or decision to avoid worse problem envisaged. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by stephnie44(f): 5:03pm On May 03, 2022 |
Kisico:
Three days ago I received an sms from a company where I dropped my C.V close to two years ago. I went through it and low and behold, it was an invitation for an interview yesterday being Saturday. I was happy really. I prepared well for it, cancelled my supplying business appointment. I do a supplying business while looking forward to a good job opportunity. So, I woke up quite early dressed up and left for the venue. I got there around 8:10am while the interview was scheduled to hold by 9:00am.
I got to the venue and met two persons who was there for the same reason. Before it was 8:50am the whole place was filled up with others who also came for the same interview.
Finally, the interview that was scheduled to hold by 9:00am started around 11:30am. It then got to my turn, I went in and met three persons in there, one man and two young ladies. Then the man started the interviewing questions and I was giving out an impressive answers, while one of the ladies tried asking me a question, the man now cut in and ask, ' by the way, are you married'? I answered, 'no, I'm single sir'. He then asked again, ' were you married before'? I paused for a while and was wondering if it will be proper to let it out exactly the way it is. Then I decided to come out plain and answered that I was married, and I tried adding to it that I left because of a case of domestic violence, but he didn't want to hear that at all, so, he immediately cut in and said, 'young lady there's no need going ahead with anything else again since you couldn't manage to stay back and remain married, is it the company that you can be able to manage'. At this point, even the two ladies were more than astonished at him than I was. He ended it and said, 'Just forget about the job'. I just left feeling so devastated.
I managed to hold back tears till I got home and nearly cried my eyes out, recalling all that I went through. It's really sad that some people feel they can throw words anyhow at others not minding what those words are doing to their emotions.
mercy will speak for u |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by yongg: 5:07pm On May 03, 2022 |
bepositive11:
No offense, but he wasn't wrong. Let me explain
Our past experiences say a lot about us. Your divorce showed you that you have problems with yourself that you need to sort out. And so does your former partner.
Don't see that as a bad thing. See it as a good thing - a good opportunity to reflect on yourself and work to become the best possible version of yourself.
Once you do this, no one's words will ever hurt you like the way that man's word hurt you, because then, you will know who you are and you wouldn't need other people to validate your worth.
The comment made by the interviewer does not go in line with what you say... If the interviewer has the freedom to make a business decision in a partnership where there is undermining antagonisms why does he now have a problem with that freedom being exercised in an emotional partnership where there are no hard metrics as found in business and that is not his concern? So the OP left, what was the rationale for him to deny her because she chose to leave her partnership. What information did he evaluate to judge her that way? What knowledge of actual emotional, social and other investments does he have to have reached that conclusion in a private matter... Sis, that man should be paying you 2 years worth of work insurance for that statement NSITF, offer an apology, or settle you out of court or resume the interview and guarantee you that position anyway... Because there is nothing that can prove that any denial he may want to claim would be because he found you inadequate due to core needs but based on your marital circumstance. 1 Like |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Babaheekmat: 5:18pm On May 03, 2022 |
Kisico:
Three days ago I received an sms from a company where I dropped my C.V close to two years ago. I went through it and low and behold, it was an invitation for an interview yesterday being Saturday. I was happy really. I prepared well for it, cancelled my supplying business appointment. I do a supplying business while looking forward to a good job opportunity. So, I woke up quite early dressed up and left for the venue. I got there around 8:10am while the interview was scheduled to hold by 9:00am.
I got to the venue and met two persons who was there for the same reason. Before it was 8:50am the whole place was filled up with others who also came for the same interview.
Finally, the interview that was scheduled to hold by 9:00am started around 11:30am. It then got to my turn, I went in and met three persons in there, one man and two young ladies. Then the man started the interviewing questions and I was giving out an impressive answers, while one of the ladies tried asking me a question, the man now cut in and ask, ' by the way, are you married'? I answered, 'no, I'm single sir'. He then asked again, ' were you married before'? I paused for a while and was wondering if it will be proper to let it out exactly the way it is. Then I decided to come out plain and answered that I was married, and I tried adding to it that I left because of a case of domestic violence, but he didn't want to hear that at all, so, he immediately cut in and said, 'young lady there's no need going ahead with anything else again since you couldn't manage to stay back and remain married, is it the company that you can be able to manage'. At this point, even the two ladies were more than astonished at him than I was. He ended it and said, 'Just forget about the job'. I just left feeling so devastated.
I managed to hold back tears till I got home and nearly cried my eyes out, recalling all that I went through. It's really sad that some people feel they can throw words anyhow at others not minding what those words are doing to their emotions.
Baba.. na the ediots lose you.. they lost dedicated worker. Chin up man. We still dey Alive.. we go make am |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Babaheekmat: 5:19pm On May 03, 2022 |
If you can see this..
Never answer personal questions.. it's absolutely not professional and uncalled for. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by bepositive11: 5:24pm On May 03, 2022 |
Well, I get your point. Now that I think about it, there are people who thrive in their work place even though they are toxic romantic partners However, the fact that she was so deeply hurt by such words said by a complete stranger says a lot about her. She needs to build a strong foundation Anyway, I'll edit my previous comment yongg:
The comment made by the interviewer does not go in line with what you say...
If he has the freedom to make a business decision in a partnership where there is undermining antagonisms why does he now have a problem with that freedom being exercised in an emotional partnership where there are no hard metrics as found in business?
So he left, what was the rationale for him to deny him because he chose to leave his partnership. What information did he evaluate to judge him that way... What knowledge of actual emotional, social and other investment does he have to have reached that conclusion in a private matter...
Bro that man should be paying you 2 years work of work insurance for that statement NSITF, offer an apology, or settle you out of court or resume the interview and guarantee you that position anyway... Because there is no guarantee that can prove that he would now deny you because he found you inadequate due to core need but based on your marital circumstance. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by yongg: 5:42pm On May 03, 2022 |
bepositive11:
Well, I get your point. Now that I think about it, there are people who thrive in their work place even though they are toxic romantic partners
However, the fact that she was so deeply hurt by such words said by a complete stranger says a lot about her. She needs to build a strong foundation
Anyway, I'll edit my previous comment
That hurt happened because it was a personal information and emotional one too for that matter. It's the same harrasment vibe that is given off when one is "unnecessarily" probed and poked for not getting married at the workplace. That sphere should be about competence and the job except in cases where the job description strictly depends on the marital status or a specific martial status is required for that quota and it can be proven that otherwise would affect the performance of that job role. When these things are done, the Occupational health and safety of the workers/employees are undermined. If that's for already working personnel, how much so for a potentially qualified candidate? In fact, where I feel some personal details have nothing to do with a job role I will decline to answer. HOWEVER, it is important to ask if your answer affect your job role (even if the answer you get is a lie you should ask that first as a precaution). For goodness sake you will work for them and they'll have to pay you for your service too, hence the interview can't be one way. It's also an active negotiate arena too. Don't let anybody bully you out of your right. Questions like are you a christian? Or what religion do you practice... Marital status I will likely answer ( I mean HMO info from there right) Etc. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by bepositive11: 6:08pm On May 03, 2022 |
I'm telling you, when you build a strong foundation with yourself, such remarks won't hurt you at all because you know who you are That woman needs to stop seeking external validation and validate herself instead. When she does that, remarks like the one that man made won't hurt her one bit I'm speaking from experience yongg:
That hurt happened because it was a personal information and emotional one too for that matter.
It's the same harrasment vibe that is given off when one is "unnecessarily" probed and poked for not getting married at the workplace. That sphere should be about competence and the job except in cases where the job description strictly depends on the marital status or a specific martial status is required for that quota and it can be proven that otherwise would not affect the performance of that job role.
When these things are done, the Occupational health and safety of the workers/employees are undermined. If that's for personnel working already how much so for a potentially qualified candidate.
In fact, where I feel some personal details have nothing to do with a job role I will decline to answer. HOWEVER, it is important to ask if your answer affect your job role (even if the answer you get is a lie you should ask that first as a precaution). For goodness sake you will work for them and they'll have to pay you for your service too, hence the interview can't be one way. It's also an active negotiate arena too. Don't let anybody bully you out of your right.
Questions like are you a christian? Or what religion do you practice...
Marital status I will likely answer ( I mean HMO info from there right)
Etc.
|
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by yongg: 6:24pm On May 03, 2022 |
bepositive11:
I'm telling you, when you build a strong foundation with yourself, such remarks won't hurt you at all because you know who you are
That woman needs to stop seeking external validation and validate herself instead. When she does that, remarks like the one that man made won't hurt her one bit
I'm speaking from experience
I agree that building a tougher skin is beneficial in the workplace generally, infact, even more so for the legal, law enforcement and other seemingly laissez-faire and easy-on-the-eye professions. However, that interviewer needed to be held accountable for that comment because it obviously had an effect on the process which shouldn't have been the case. Because one can take a beating doesn't mean the person should collect one or any unwarranted. Humans have a right to personal dignity and self preservation. If you encourage the process by not doing anything always and walking away simply because you can take a beating and have developed tough skin. The situation will continually get worse, your side of the business will not get respected and yet you be on the losing side, he perpetuator will be emboldened to repeat that same uncivilized act on another and another, until one person (it will take one person to give him the hell he deserves and desires) and that person can be the victim (a first person victim/stakeholder) to address that development. The psychology behind this is why Electric Distribution Companies will estimate bills and give to citizens of their own country for a month period whereas little or no power was given in that area within that time. Yet no proof that there was power supplied that reached the client to demand for such. Meanwhile, I see non Nigerian win access to express their human right and goodwill of Nigerians more than the citizens in thier own home country. I cannot deny the immigrants their right because it's inhuman and non-conduct to do so, so why should legitimate children of the house suffer more than the visitors/neighbours'? Isn't paying NGN 4000 ridiculous for a total accumulated estimate of 2 days(could have been less) of electricity for a month period? But because the other party has tough skin you always walk away. Don't you see who is perpetually losing here (and it's one-sided)? Is the victim of that injustice that rich to be paying for 93% darkness? That there means that it is equivalent to EDC providing a darkness delivery service to the members of the public to purchase almost total darkness for NGN 4000. Now why would you want to buy darkness when you can get it for free? The service or objective of the business agreed upon by both partners in the business is to provide power. If one party pays and there's no commensurate power provided, that is injustice. Redress should be sought. If it is not important why then does EDC insist that you must pay what you owe? Why can't they develop thick skin like you have been doing and walk away so that there will be a balance? Imagine if the other party were a business, you think it would be abnormal to seek redress asap? Some will not even ask, straight to court. Civil or criminal case. We don't see these thing as business entities else all the nonsense happening in this country will reduce. The other time one alledged Police officer harrassed, illegally arrested hence kidnapped someone close at Farm City open 247 in Lagos late at night, person was female and was alone, I guess considered her perfect prey. In addition to that he illegally detained and extorted (a theft) (at least 5 count charges against him already) a huge sum from his victim a citizen for goodness sake... Meanwhile, some Indians and Chinese are gaining access to your country, skipping extensions of stay and even worse overstaying in the same country and walking freely without a legitimate checkmate... This is also from experience, check their wrong behavior, demand that equity of service both parties are entitled to and sniff the life out of that injustice period. Get treated badly? ask for instant redress, don't keep shut, infact what the worse that can happen... Pull a cost-benefit analysis on this. Even if the payment is death, they will never forget the struggle prior. Don't give them the benefit of an easy win always, you don't even have to win. A snippet of an example of what I am talking about here https://www.instagram.com/p/CcfkWudrdGT/?igshid=MDJmNzVkMjY=Madam overstayed, tenable to the charges, her case is perculiar but still it doesn't give one the right to treat her like you like. It's her human right and what professional conduct demands, meanwhile this is while she maybe in the wrong and it's not because she's American, if the institution party of the business is accountable the individual client has to be defended and demand justice and hopefully get justice. So why subject your citizen to torture, same torture that cycles back to you after affecting a whole lot of people undeserving. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Moneyyman: 7:03pm On May 03, 2022 |
Congratulations! You probably escaped a toxic boss/work. And double congratulations for leaving a marriage that would probably have caused your death.
Cry and let the pain heal. You'll get another job. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by bepositive11: 7:17pm On May 03, 2022 |
What I was saying goes deeper than building a tough skin. A lot of people have a tough skin -- they look strong and intimidating on the outside but they are very weak underneath all that facade. I actually meant building a tough core -- strengthening what's beneath that skin. Anyway, regarding your comment, I'm not saying that we should ignore people when they act wrongly. I was saying that we shouldn't let people get to us too easily, that we shouldn't take what just anyone says too personally. In fact, if OP had a stronger core, she would've been able to stand up to him and call him out on his nonsense. If Nigerians had a stronger core, they would stand up for what they deserve instead of being taking advantaged off. yongg:
I agree that building a tougher skin is beneficial in the workplace generally, infact, even more so for the legal, law enforcement and other seemingly laissez-faire and easy-on-the-eye professions.
However, that interviewer needed to be held accountable for that comment because it obviously had an effect on the process which shouldn't have been the case.
Because one can take a beating doesn't mean the person should collect one or any unwarranted. Humans have a right to personal dignity and self preservation. If you encourage the process by not doing anything always and walking away simply because you can take a beating and have developed tough skin. The situation will continually get worse, your side of the business will not get respected and yet you be on the losing side, he perpetuator will be emboldened to repeat that same uncivilized act on another and another, until one person (it will take one person to give him the hell he deserves and desires) and that person can be the victim (a first person victim/stakeholder) to address that development.
The psychology behind this is why Electric Distribution Companies will estimate bills and give to citizens of their own country for a month period whereas little or no power was given in that area within that time. Yet no proof that there was power supplied that reached the client to demand for such. Meanwhile, I see non Nigerian win access to express their human right and goodwill of Nigerians more than the citizens in thier own home country. I cannot deny the immigrant their right so while should legitimate children of the house suffer more than the neighbors?
Isn't paying NGN4000 ridiculous for a total accumulated estimate of 2 days(could have been less) of electricity for a month period?
But because the other party has tough skin you always walk away. Don't you see who is losing? Is the victim of that injustice that rich to be paying for 93% darkness?
Imagine if the other party were a business, you think it would be abnormal to seek redress asap? Some will not even ask, straight to court. Civil or criminal case.
We don't see these thing as business entities else all the nonsense happening in this country will reduce.
The other time one alledged Police office harrassed, illegally arrested hence kidnapped someone close at farm City open 247 in Lagos, person was female and was alone, I guess considered her perfect prey. In addition to that extorted( a theft) a huge sum from his victim a citizen for goodness sake... Meanwhile, some Indians and Chinese are gaining access to your country, skipping extensions of stay and even worse overstaying in the same country and walking freely without a legitimate checkmate...
|
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by kkins25(m): 7:18pm On May 03, 2022 |
Im just wondering what the connection between your marital life and the job is. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Swinger60(f): 7:20pm On May 03, 2022 |
Kisico:
Three days ago I received an sms from a company where I dropped my C.V close to two years ago. I went through it and low and behold, it was an invitation for an interview yesterday being Saturday. I was happy really. I prepared well for it, cancelled my supplying business appointment. I do a supplying business while looking forward to a good job opportunity. So, I woke up quite early dressed up and left for the venue. I got there around 8:10am while the interview was scheduled to hold by 9:00am.
I got to the venue and met two persons who was there for the same reason. Before it was 8:50am the whole place was filled up with others who also came for the same interview.
Finally, the interview that was scheduled to hold by 9:00am started around 11:30am. It then got to my turn, I went in and met three persons in there, one man and two young ladies. Then the man started the interviewing questions and I was giving out an impressive answers, while one of the ladies tried asking me a question, the man now cut in and ask, ' by the way, are you married'? I answered, 'no, I'm single sir'. He then asked again, ' were you married before'? I paused for a while and was wondering if it will be proper to let it out exactly the way it is. Then I decided to come out plain and answered that I was married, and I tried adding to it that I left because of a case of domestic violence, but he didn't want to hear that at all, so, he immediately cut in and said, 'young lady there's no need going ahead with anything else again since you couldn't manage to stay back and remain married, is it the company that you can be able to manage'. At this point, even the two ladies were more than astonished at him than I was. He ended it and said, 'Just forget about the job'. I just left feeling so devastated.
I managed to hold back tears till I got home and nearly cried my eyes out, recalling all that I went through. It's really sad that some people feel they can throw words anyhow at others not minding what those words are doing to their emotions.
sorry about your experience. we have mean people in this world. I had an issue with a colleague in my place of work over a fan, I was shocked how she switched from the fan issue to telling me to go and have children. even though I gave her my own answer back. I still died inside me. I went to the car park, called my mother on phone and cried my heart out. Till I die, that girl will be my enemy for life. 2 Likes |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by yongg: 7:48pm On May 03, 2022 |
bepositive11:
What I was saying goes deeper than building a tough skin. A lot of people have a tough skin -- they look strong and intimidating on the outside but they are very weak underneath all that facade. I actually meant building a tough core -- strengthening what's beneath that skin.
Anyway, regarding your comment, I'm not saying that we should ignore people when they act wrongly. I was saying that we shouldn't let people get to us too easily, that we shouldn't take what just anyone says too personally.
In fact, if OP had a stronger core, she would've been able to stand up to him and call him out on his nonsense. If Nigerians had a stronger core, they would stand up for what they deserve instead of being taking advantaged off.
I understand you... tough skin, tough core, every every... "tomaeto" "tomato", I agree, I'll give you that. However, my focus is in the accountability component. it is such that even if someone didn't have a tough core, it's an obligation to seek a redress for that wrong or injustice because it is even more critical than whether or not the victim is enjoying the benefit of a tough core. In reality, some people still sue even after they have cried from the effect of not having a tough core. Some are very poker-faced or indifferent about it probably because they have understood humans to have these biases and require the need for the checks and balance and still sue. Sue them regardless, let them prove their innocence in a court of competent jury. |
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| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Kisico: 9:06pm On May 03, 2022 |
post=112483519:
This is just sonsad and emotional to read.
That was very cruel and wicked from him.
Don't worry Sis.
God is saving the best for the last for you.
Just take it that, the job doesn't belong to you.
God is shaping you for a better place.
It will end in Praise.
One thing we always tell people is that
'Leave that relationship/marriage if things become too violent".
Your life comes first.
Dead people tell no tale.
One's life and sanity comes first indeed. Thanks |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Kisico: 9:10pm On May 03, 2022 |
darealbabe:
That was totally Insensitive and unacceptable.
I wish you gave them a piece of your mind and walked out. Nonsense.
Besides they are complete strangers and their words and baseless opinions should mean NOTHING to you. Yes, you are right. I have gotten over it though. 1 Like |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Kisico: 9:28pm On May 03, 2022 |
SeriouslySense:
You seem very intelligent, don't worry, i think you can even manage a business yourself, You have value maybe its time you create your own Job, relax, i think the idea will come to you. 
Unfortunately we will meet terrible people who are terrible with words, just erase their words, and keep going on.
Words have power, we should strive to always use it wisely. Wow, I quite appreciate, and the idea is really coming. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Kisico: 9:34pm On May 03, 2022 |
baralatie:
Why would anyone ask about marriage?
That is a bit off!
And at least he could have left it simply as
"Okay I understand,let us go on to more important issues that concerns your level of productivity" |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by iRepNaija1: 9:37pm On May 03, 2022 |
Kisico:
Three days ago I received an sms from a company where I dropped my C.V close to two years ago. I went through it and low and behold, it was an invitation for an interview yesterday being Saturday. I was happy really. I prepared well for it, cancelled my supplying business appointment. I do a supplying business while looking forward to a good job opportunity. So, I woke up quite early dressed up and left for the venue. I got there around 8:10am while the interview was scheduled to hold by 9:00am.
I got to the venue and met two persons who was there for the same reason. Before it was 8:50am the whole place was filled up with others who also came for the same interview.
Finally, the interview that was scheduled to hold by 9:00am started around 11:30am. It then got to my turn, I went in and met three persons in there, one man and two young ladies. Then the man started the interviewing questions and I was giving out an impressive answers, while one of the ladies tried asking me a question, the man now cut in and ask, ' by the way, are you married'? I answered, 'no, I'm single sir'. He then asked again, ' were you married before'? I paused for a while and was wondering if it will be proper to let it out exactly the way it is. Then I decided to come out plain and answered that I was married, and I tried adding to it that I left because of a case of domestic violence, but he didn't want to hear that at all, so, he immediately cut in and said, 'young lady there's no need going ahead with anything else again since you couldn't manage to stay back and remain married, is it the company that you can be able to manage'. At this point, even the two ladies were more than astonished at him than I was. He ended it and said, 'Just forget about the job'. I just left feeling so devastated.
I managed to hold back tears till I got home and nearly cried my eyes out, recalling all that I went through. It's really sad that some people feel they can throw words anyhow at others not minding what those words are doing to their emotions.
What does your personal life have to do with your professional life? OP, fùck that job and fùck him. Can you imagine having that man as a supervisor? You dodged a bullet. You'll get a job that is more suited for you. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by yongg: 9:39pm On May 03, 2022 |
Moneyyman:
Congratulations! You probably escaped a toxic boss/work. And double congratulations for leaving a marriage that would probably have caused your death.
Cry and let the pain heal. You'll get another job. The reason why such kind of people need to see the courts as often as possible is that it is possible he is not the boss or one overall. It is possible he is just a representative of that business like any other personnel employed. Even if that weren't the case, such persons deserve their day in court. What's there, is it not to come and prove whether the judgement call he made was right or wrong? Infact, by the time well meaning organizations that are smart see a lawsuit coming, the organization will distance itself from the behavior of that person before it goes any further with a fair settlement. The escape is not enough to deter a personal attack which has nothing to do with an interview process. 1 Like |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Olatara(f): 9:49pm On May 03, 2022 |
And you stood up and left him just like that? Yes! I won't the job, but I will put him on his place. Please stop being emotional, you don't even need to cry, don't worry you will get another job. Some HR sef  |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Olatara(f): 9:53pm On May 03, 2022 |
Amalekki:
Also, OP you are not under any obligation to provide accurate information on an illegal inquiry or question. Keep your private information private unless disclosure is required by law e.g. if you are before a judge or writing a statement on oath under the law.
Know your rights and be smart. Her mistake. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by 9182736455O1999(m): 11:27pm On May 03, 2022 |
Kisico:
Thanks. @ the bolded, honestly, he is definitely one. It's even written all over him. Maybe it is the same way he saw incompetence written all over you. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by RillJ(m): 8:15am On May 04, 2022 |
The barbaric brutish bully probably did you a huge favour without any of you knowing.
Cheer up sis! |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by achimendy(m): 10:09am On May 04, 2022 |
Kisico:
Three days ago I received an sms from a company where I dropped my C.V close to two years ago. I went through it and low and behold, it was an invitation for an interview yesterday being Saturday. I was happy really. I prepared well for it, cancelled my supplying business appointment. I do a supplying business while looking forward to a good job opportunity. So, I woke up quite early dressed up and left for the venue. I got there around 8:10am while the interview was scheduled to hold by 9:00am.
I got to the venue and met two persons who was there for the same reason. Before it was 8:50am the whole place was filled up with others who also came for the same interview.
Finally, the interview that was scheduled to hold by 9:00am started around 11:30am. It then got to my turn, I went in and met three persons in there, one man and two young ladies. Then the man started the interviewing questions and I was giving out an impressive answers, while one of the ladies tried asking me a question, the man now cut in and ask, ' by the way, are you married'? I answered, 'no, I'm single sir'. He then asked again, ' were you married before'? I paused for a while and was wondering if it will be proper to let it out exactly the way it is. Then I decided to come out plain and answered that I was married, and I tried adding to it that I left because of a case of domestic violence, but he didn't want to hear that at all, so, he immediately cut in and said, 'young lady there's no need going ahead with anything else again since you couldn't manage to stay back and remain married, is it the company that you can be able to manage'. At this point, even the two ladies were more than astonished at him than I was. He ended it and said, 'Just forget about the job'. I just left feeling so devastated.
I managed to hold back tears till I got home and nearly cried my eyes out, recalling all that I went through. It's really sad that some people feel they can throw words anyhow at others not minding what those words are doing to their emotions.
I think you caused your problem yourself. Next time don't tell them you're married again. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by bepositive11: 11:53pm On May 04, 2022 |
Well, you have some good points. Hold him accountable yongg:
I understand you...
tough skin, tough core, every every... "tomaeto" "tomato", I agree, I'll give you that.
However, my focus is in the accountability component. it is such that even if someone didn't have a tough core, it's an obligation to seek a redress for that wrong or injustice because it is even more critical than whether or not the victim is enjoying the benefit of a tough core.
In reality, some people still sue even after they have cried from the effect of not having a tough core. Some are very poker-faced or indifferent about it probably because they have understood humans to have these biases and require the need for the checks and balance and still sue.
Sue them regardless, let them prove their innocence in a court of competent jury. |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by BluntCrazeMan: 4:28pm On May 06, 2022 |
Iamdbull:
Dbull on this one!!!
My career is about to die because of nairalanders statements Go out there.!! Hit the real world out there.!! Leave Nairaland For Your Own Good |
| Re: Some People Kill With Words by Nobody: 7:09pm On May 06, 2022 |
You self wetin make you comot for marriage Domestic violence? Your husband will just wake up and yawns then he sees you and just start beating you and throwing punches right? And you no do anything to provoke am really? I support that man that dismissed your arse 100 percent. If you can not tame your husband and make him gentle when talking to him that anything you say he's happy to do because of your respectful nature. Is it client of a company that are total strangers you will be able to handle? You will mete out the same treatment that made your husband to be domestically violent on the clients and they will all run away  Kudos to the man for being very intelligent and asking that question. He must have sensed how petty you could be in his spirit and he followed his guts. Even if you had said you were never married. I trust those kind of people . He would ask you if you have a boyfriend if you say yes, he would ask if he has a job chances are you'll say no and when you say no he would say can you give him 60% of your income to establish him to start something and your mumu would say no and the man will still dismiss you based on the fact that if you can't sacrifice and give your all to your boyfriend whom you love. How would you sacrifice and give your all to a company you know nothing about I will like to meet that man someday, very wise and intelligent . |
