So what if ur sad silly woman. No (n) sense

@poster
u admited that he has been nice to u nd eva lovely since u married him rit ? my advice to u don allow this bring issues btw u two ,d issues u talked about are very minor cases ,since he ws talking to his sis it cld be a way of their expressn afterall you were not there wen they were grown up.secondly abt d age my 'sister' wen some loves u they can do watever to keep u nd more also pple can post wateve values they wish abt themselves on facebk .dis are not sufficient yardstic to judge his lov 4u .so b carefull for notin.d fact is dat he loves u nd kid.u can ask him politly but dnt ready meanings the resons r not wot it.ufficient yardstic to judge his lov 4u .so b carefull for notin.d fact is dat he loves u nd kid.u can ask him politly but dnt ready meanings the resons r not wot it.

I really don't comment on personal topics but I can't help but say two things here. In virtually all Nigerian cultural groupings a man does not refer to his wife in the first narrative particularly to someone younger. He cannot say to his younger sister 'My wife is taking my child out, bla, bla'. First of all that would be disrespecting you before someone who is probably younger, secondly Nigerians and Africans generally view the relationship of marriage in the a more wholesome context with the children included. You are married to complete a family which includes children so part of your worth which he would like to portray are the children. In Africa children are an honour and I'm sure he would would love you more if you could address him likewise instead of his first name which I'm sure you do currently.

I don't really appreciate culture (more problematic in the context of national unity) but there you are. On the second point don't you think for a moment that the ages of his sisters could be the one under question. Their purported ages could be the magnet besides your compass. If you permit me (ladies) African men do not usually alter their ages, certainly not when it involves socialization, business and earnings perhaps but not when it concerns relationships. They usually have nothing to fear and maturity is more of an asset not a liability. Unlike the west, here it is usually women who tamper with the calendar for obvious reasons.

Hey, I support what omolola said: your hobby calling you d mother of his children is very normal, what else should he av said. Cos he dint say AM IN D CAR WITH MY WIFE AND D CHILDREN, doesn't mean a thing o. Stop bn too sensitive. And as for d age thing, its facebook for crying out loud: I don't see how you would be taking dat serious.
But if you feel you want to ask him to satisfy urself, take it easy with him and don't raise issue dat aint there b4. OK?
9Jawhat ever, what's ur problem?

Sister i can see that you don't have a clue of what Nigeria culture is all about,
if you were leaving in Nigeria and your Husband say that kind of word to you is does not mean anything to us ,because

is our tradition they don't see any thing bad in it. Regarding the age ,must people don't disclose their realm age,am a good example of it,i have nver in my life use my real age not to talk of my real identity
so please realize your mind,so as to take good care of your children.

I now see reasons why some people go against inter-tribal marriage. Not being a Nigerian has made you mis interprete your loving husband. Every Nigerian woman will understand that there is nothing wrong in your husband calling you " the children's mum" or are you not there biological mum ? cos you whites can b so funny sometimes. If there is anything you discover you don't like, why not call him and let him know. Madam white woman save your marriage wisely.

OP, no vex, that's our communication style.

Nairalanders!!!!! Six pages answering to this bullshit!!! Can't u see this story ain't real? She's writing English like whaaaat? Puhleeeeeeeeeeez, save me the space and trouble! Silly post!! I'm out,

The funny aspect of it is that she has ignore the tread that she made her self

without giving us the final solution to her stree.

Sarah a:

The funny aspect of it is that she has ignore the tread that she made her self

without giving us the final solution to her stree.

yep! thats a typical white woman very faint hearted she couldnt handle some of the comments( truth) i hope she hasnt gone and slashed her wrists

Pafuri:

It is my considered opinion that SarahMaria has since left the building.  

yea just like Elvis

pleep:

With all due respect man, shut up. The only reason she is so suspicious is because so many people have been telling her horror stories about Nigerian men. who can blame her for being worried?

What about the horror stories about american men?
You think its only in nigeria they find evil ppl?

hmmmmm

Sara,

Would suggest you ask him but you have to be subtle and also assertive. God would direct you and enrich you with wisdom.

Takia

Thank you for the comments.
I read them and I think I understand him now a little bit better. I think I just made a problem for nothing.

I spoke with my man yesterday and he was just smiling and ask me why I do not ask him directly. I should never keep something like this in my mind again.

So thank you a lot and I swear I will never start a discussion here again. Some people are to bad here
But for all the nice ones: Thanks a lot

actually every woman knows how to have a discussion with her hubby, sum prefer midnight while some immediately after dinner so madam please find a convenient period to discuss this matter with your husband.
i think he will try to reason with you because we men say somethings sumtimes and you women will quoted it, whereas we might not know that its pains .
please confront him and share the talk. God bless your family.

SarahMaria:

Thank you for the comments.
I read them and I think I understand him now a little bit better. I think I just made a problem for nothing.

I spoke with my man yesterday and he was just smiling and ask me why I do not ask him directly. I should never keep something like this in my mind again.

So thank you a lot and I swear I will never start a discussion here again. Some people are to bad here
But for all the nice ones: Thanks a lot

I was wondering what became of you, i did not respond because the best has been said and repeated again and again. Am glad you sorted things out and all the best in all your marriage.

I believe you can still ask questions here maybe not necessarily deep things like relationship, you can still learn from some sincere people here about African culture, general mentality etc, but you need to be able to disregard the, jokers, pranksters, bigots, racists and tribalists.

cheers.

i feel you just sit him down and talk to him about what you feel or think because a times some issues are far different from what we think,i think the best way of resolving issues is talking about it the best way, peace

I believe you can still ask questions here maybe not necessarily deep things like relationship, you can still learn from some sincere people here about African culture, general mentality etc, but you need to be able to disregard the, jokers, pranksters, bigots, racists and tribalists.

Yes I will do that

@ poster
every forum like dis has its own breed of jokers nd nasty pple .dnt be intimidated by mere post ,pick ur points nd throw the trash .share ur prob s. afterall u hav some idea now e

I will say pray about; ask God to allow you to see the deception if there is any. Never come to this fourm for advice cause most of the folks are rude. I come here from time to time for laughs. Some of the women here have boyfriends abroad married, and will soon join them as soon as they divorce in about two to three years. And some of the men are trying to scam women into marriage for papers.See Some of the .women will go along with the scam marriage, cause they will benefit from it in some kind of way. If your husband rushed you into marriage, then he is a scammer

We all know say Na d Amu you love, if you think say na lie , Come Spain, No offence

English might not be her first language,

Is that a problem?
I see a lot of people here, who do not write a good English.

When that is your only problem, be happy

@9jafetish

People like you should not be on this forum giving stupid and idiotic comments
Why should the lady marry a white man? Frustrated Nigerian women like you should keep their comments to themselves if you have nothing positive to contribute to this forum rather than sounding like an educated illiterate

It's a culture thing! I think you need to exercise your wife right by asking him why he uses that word for you.

OP as long as you dont look like this woman below then there"s nothing to fear about your hubby dating you for papers

i dont think he calling you "the mum" is a big deal, my folks n a lota nigerian ppl i kno do it all the time, however about the age thing, u might wanna ask him,

Just want to ask, are you a white woman or an indian woman? meanwhile, i havent seen what your husband's offence is here. so take the tag nigerian man out of teh gist,

SEUN, why is this on the front pageeeeeeeeeeeeee?

@ruffrider (f) , You are just plain stupid. Go find a life and stop commenting trash and insulting Nigerian men. Waiting Oyibo get to offer? They all deceived us and use our wealth to enrich themselves. They have not seen anything yet, they would even see more of 9ja men deal with them for the papers. Rubbish