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Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? - Family - Nairaland

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Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Comic22: 2:48pm On Jul 19, 2011
Why Do African Relatives Always Want To Be In Your Business?
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Nobody: 3:21pm On Jul 19, 2011
As for me, I really do not care what any of them says or think.

My mom is the only person I try to please. (at least I try grin)

I don't give a f about the rest.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Fhemmmy: 3:36pm On Jul 19, 2011
Cos you pay attention to them . . .
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by iice(f): 6:28pm On Jul 20, 2011
^^Abi ooo


@Topic
Just ignore those that you don't have to please.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by 2mch(m): 6:37pm On Jul 20, 2011
If you tell people your business, they will be in it. If you learn to keep your mouth shut, no one will know your business. undecided
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by sweeti14(f): 8:27pm On Jul 20, 2011
For as long as i can remember African relatives have always been nosy like that and i don't think it's about to change. Why exactly they are like that i don't know angry .Well from experience i found out that some of them were actually truly concerned but with the way they went about their "concern" it came across to me as being nosy. Ignore the nosy ones and appreciate the ones that truly care about you and are concerned smiley
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Roland17(m): 6:21am On Jul 21, 2011
The earlier u draw the lines, the better for u and ur future.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by obowunmi(m): 10:08am On Jul 21, 2011
They care about you girl, that's why. Just ignore them or de-friend them from your face book. Reminds me of the popular saying: It takes a whole village to raise a child" --- the whol village are your family members letting you know, don't f up because we here. Manage shey you here ---- when its time for college, go far away. Good luck
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by SleekReek(m): 11:40am On Jul 21, 2011
You need to address this wisely and decisively because when you get married it will continue and then it can cause great strain on your marriage.I had a similiar problem and i realise it's just African mentality,my sibblings abroad are never harrassed by relatives(because they will not take that sh*t) but me here in Nigeria they would not mind there business. So i systematically put a full stop to the rubbish,it led to alot of quarrels,shouts,talks of oh! how disrespectful i have become, but in the end my point became very clear,mind your own business and respect my boundaries.So when it was time to get married i stood firm by my decisions politely and did what i was convinced to do,the secret be a good listner to there advices but in the end do what you want and feel convinced to do(you alone are responsible for your actions. If you don't start now to let them know there boundaries,you will have a torrid time keeping them out of your marriage business when you decide to marry,that is if they allow you even marry your choice,since it is a habit to them to now also put eye for ya business,besides since your attemp to stop them from mendling in your business then will be new to them,they may blame your would be husband or husband then.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by maclatunji: 1:07pm On Jul 22, 2011
Can someone try to explain the concept of "godsister" to me?
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by ifyalways(f): 3:38pm On Jul 22, 2011
maclatunji:

Can someone try to explain the concept of "godsister" to me?
LOL
Your "godmom's" daughter undecided

@Topic,Learn to deal and live with it.Its African and is not going to stop anytime soon.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by maclatunji: 11:19am On Jul 23, 2011
The concept is ridiculous!
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by dayokanu(m): 6:58pm On Jul 23, 2011
because you have a business
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Nobody: 5:58am On Aug 05, 2011
Now we know why they are always in your business. Mrs belly button piercer
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by clemcykul(f): 12:56pm On Aug 05, 2011
dey always want to be in ur business becuz u allow dem
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by stagger: 11:06am On Oct 11, 2011
They are in your business for the money. Simple.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Ayowumie(m): 11:16am On Oct 11, 2011
dayokanu:

because you have a business
Exactly.
2mch:

If you tell people your business, they will be in it. If you learn to keep your mouth shut, no one will know your business. undecided
I suppose this is an advice
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by werepeLeri: 11:17am On Oct 11, 2011
These lame topics keep making it to the front pages.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by Nobody: 11:27am On Oct 11, 2011
As for me, That will not happen and if they try it, they'll lose the respect I have for them. Besides, I'm not close to them and I don't expect them to mind my business.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by SNCOQ3(m): 11:28am On Oct 11, 2011
Because Africans are communal by nature. It has its advantages though
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by born2boink(m): 11:37am On Oct 11, 2011
No country mind their own business and USA is the worst poking nose in countries watching if they are building Nuclear weapons all not and France don't mind their business too, African is the best and always the best, the rest na copy-cat
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by shumno(f): 11:43am On Oct 11, 2011
It is an African thing. They say charity begins at home, if you can't tolerate your own relatives, it will be difficult tolerating your neighbors that is why you sometimes are cousins simply because you are from the same village with someone else. As for me it is ok that way I know they care about me as long as they are understanding. We need more love in the land please.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by fm7070: 11:52am On Oct 11, 2011
SNCOQ3:

Because Africans are communal by nature. It has its advantages though
Yes, but if care if not taken, the disadvantage is overtaking the advantages.

African men should take their nuclear family as the first priority and do not allow anyone whosoever (even your mother) to toy with their feelings. Once you set this high standard, every other person will stay clear.

I had an experience recently and this was what saved me and my nuclear family. When the extended folks (my mom inclusive) saw that I wasn't ready to joke with my family, they laid low, I know for sure, they won't try to mess with my wife anymore, never in their lives.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by showstopa: 11:52am On Oct 11, 2011
@OP, Because someone else is minding their business for them same as you are minding another person's business.  grin
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by SNCOQ3(m): 12:08pm On Oct 11, 2011
fm7070:

Yes, but if care if not taken, the disadvantage is overtaking the advantages.

African men should take their nuclear family as the first priority and do not allow anyone whosoever (even your mother) to toy with their feelings. Once you set this high standard, every other person will stay clear.

I had an experience recently and this was what saved me and my nuclear family. When the extended folks (my mom inclusive) saw that I wasn't ready to joke with my family, they laid low, I know for sure, they won't try to mess with my wife anymore, never in their lives.

True talk
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by brainpulse: 12:17pm On Oct 11, 2011
It must stop. Because it is the cause of broken home in young couples. Every family member will try to give advice to the man and the woman, not giving them room to trust in there own decisions, and not giving the couple the opportunity to come to agree on how to chart the course of their marriage. They call the wife separately giving her advice that could destroy her home, if she doesnt allow them, she has built the wall of enemity, If she allows them then they will say she is a witch.
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by dhtml1(m): 12:50pm On Oct 11, 2011
The one i hate is the one where the Mother in-law will now come and become the husband in the house.

I cannot let my mother come into my house and start dictating for my wife what to cook. . . .and all those
nonsense and ingrediens thing. No pun intended - i have nothing against mother's love and all that. But. . . .
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by pinkrex(m): 1:18pm On Oct 11, 2011
Joblessness and illiteracy undecided
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by moreprof: 1:20pm On Oct 11, 2011
they are just pre-occupied with concerns for others!
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by ariblaze(m): 1:28pm On Oct 11, 2011
@poster

its african relatives. . . . .you are their business
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by SwiftSMS(f): 1:30pm On Oct 11, 2011
fm7070:

Yes, but if care if not taken, the disadvantage is overtaking the advantages.

African men should take their nuclear family as the first priority and do not allow anyone whosoever (even your mother) to toy with their feelings. Once you set this high standard, every other person will stay clear.

I had an experience recently and this was what saved me and my nuclear family. When the extended folks (my mom inclusive) saw that I wasn't ready to joke with my family, they laid low, I know for sure, they won't try to mess with my wife anymore, never in their lives.

2mch:

If you tell people your business, they will be in it. If you learn to keep your mouth shut, no one will know your business. undecided
Re: Why Cant African Relatives Mind Their Business? by SwiftSMS(f): 1:36pm On Oct 11, 2011
fm7070:

Yes, but if care if not taken, the disadvantage is overtaking the advantages.

African men should take their nuclear family as the first priority and do not allow anyone whosoever (even your mother) to toy with their feelings. Once you set this high standard, every other person will stay clear.

I had an experience recently and this was what saved me and my nuclear family. When the extended folks (my mom inclusive) saw that I wasn't ready to joke with my family, they laid low, I know for sure, they won't try to mess with my wife anymore, never in their lives.

2mch:

If you tell people your business, they will be in it. If you learn to keep your mouth shut, no one will know your business. undecided


Gospel truth, preach it guys.

And fm7070 thanks for making your nuclear family your number one priority.

Too many people are doing the opposite i.e putting the nuclear family in the backseat while letting the extended one ride up-front it's just sad

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