Kobojunkie:
Stop that nonsense! The man eats moi-moi outside but bullies his wife over the same.On top of that, he speaks down to her telling her she is only for sex and cooking. Don't need to be a rocket scientist to realize this is more than just about beans and moi-moi.

Shut up with your nonsense.
Go and fight for the woman na.
U for comot cain for am. Or deh

RightToReject:



The fact that he doesn't like moi-moi (or the one she prepares) but the majority do is enough reason for him to accept her decision to continue preparing it as a meal for the family in good faith. Life doesn't revolve around him; that is what it means to be thoughtful as a man. Where there was no existing/hidden animosity between him and his wife, and assuming that they have always been mutually sacrificial toward each other, the wife could cheerfully and seamlessly find a way of making an alternative meal available for him; just as he could always personally find a way to fix his own meal in such an instance too, when the wife is sincerely unopportune to do so, unless he's destitute that is incapacitated and can't afford to fix his own meal directly or indirectly.

There's hidden animosity between them; this issue of a meal is just an afterthought. And she and her husband alone know the cause of the rift in their union.

The majority of couples are nothing more than frenemies living together.

Some of you can never just keep a man.
This is the reason why there is usually domestic violence and some people beat their wives to death.
ARROGANCE
PRIDE
You want to match up to a man? WHO THE F#CK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ?

Most of you barely contribute anything meaningful to the house, yet you want to make rules and have things done in your way? Lol
Well many of you just write some of these defensive nonsense online for cruise. In real life, who born monkey?

The head of the house makes the rules. YOU ARE JUST THERE TO COME UP WITH OPINIONS (OPINIONS I SAID) BUT NEVER TO COUNTER HIS SAYS.
KNOW THAT AND KNOW PEACE OR DIE TRYING.

Make una carry una wahala go.

Nobody send you message to marry.

You are always going to experience interpersonal problems with people. Nairaland will not be the one to help you sort them out. I am sure you knew his behaviour before you married him. If you can't stand the heat, why are you in the kitchen?

That's if it's not a fake story sef.

The truth is-moi moi and beans is not the issue there is an underlying problem somewhere and he is using moi moi as an excuse. He might not even tell you the real wahala even if you ask. Just do his bidding to avoid problem or speak to a counselor if you're interestd i'll give you my counselor's number.

Op pls take this advice

Lalakas:
Am not happy with my husband's utterances towards me. He unapologetically told me my duties are just 2: to give him se. X and to cook. This guy has really hurt me in this marriage, he seems not to know how to talk.

I work and equally contribute to everything. I dont hide my income and i give him for the building we are both building. I am not useless and i am not a liability to him.

How it all started :
Moimoi or beans is for every other Friday or Saturday ( moimoi could be ones in 6 weeks except my kids specially ask for it) but for a while now whenever I prepare any of the 2 he would complain, regect it. He told me he doesn't like them during the week and I will never prepare them Sunday to Thursday. Friday because he won't be going to work the following day. My kids like eating moimoi very well, infact, it is one their best meals. Atimes, they ask for it. My husband sees moimoi and beans as crap. Guys, he buys it and eat it outside!, my moimoi doesn't purge anyone of us. Even him but he'd keep saying he purges with moimoi, it's just an excuse.

It is difficult to cook 2 foods, i will not stop making moimoi or beans because of him, my kids like the meal so much. For the fact that he buys it out there and this food is what we usually enjoy together before now, i cant stop cooking it.

He has in many ways abused me, he is not someone I should even go the extra mile for, he doesnt sacrifice for me, he doesn't respect me, he doesn't stay close to me except when he wants se. X, always going out. He is very scarce at home. I can't cook 2 foods on days i cook moimoi or beans.

And for telling me my duties are just 2 in his life, I feel abused for allowing him have se. X with me all these while, i feel like a kitchen tool for cooking for him. His intentions and motives about a women are so demeaning.

I am feeling so ashamed of myself. He place no value on me.

... there's always two sides to every story..make una try hear from d husband first then u go know say no be common moi moi cause d matter...wetin I know sef..

OSUigboFlatHead:

Some of you can never just keep a man.
This is the reason why there is usually domestic violence and some people beat their wives to death.
ARROGANCE
PRIDE
You want to match up to a man? WHO THE F#CK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ?

Most of you barely contribute anything meaningful to the house, yet you want to make rules and have things done in your way? Lol
Well many of you just write some of these defensive nonsense online for cruise. In real life, who born monkey?

The head of the house makes the rules. YOU ARE JUST THERE TO COME UP WITH OPINIONS (OPINIONS I SAID) BUT NEVER TO COUNTER HIS SAYS.
KNOW THAT AND KNOW PEACE OR DIE TRYING.

Should I descend on you now, it will seem as if I take pleasure in oppressing small-minded elements like you. With this your response to my post, you either left your brain offline before coming online or you have an outright low IQ, given that my moniker bears a male symbol, and nowhere in my post did I state being otherwise.

Scram before I change my mind and descend on you heavily. Bumpkin.

Lalakas:
Am not happy with my husband's utterances towards me. He unapologetically told me my duties are just 2: to give him se. X and to cook. This guy has really hurt me in this marriage, he seems not to know how to talk.

I work and equally contribute to everything. I dont hide my income and i give him for the building we are both building. I am not useless and i am not a liability to him.

How it all started :
Moimoi or beans is for every other Friday or Saturday ( moimoi could be ones in 6 weeks except my kids specially ask for it) but for a while now whenever I prepare any of the 2 he would complain, regect it. He told me he doesn't like them during the week and I will never prepare them Sunday to Thursday. Friday because he won't be going to work the following day. My kids like eating moimoi very well, infact, it is one their best meals. Atimes, they ask for it. My husband sees moimoi and beans as crap. Guys, he buys it and eat it outside!, my moimoi doesn't purge anyone of us. Even him but he'd keep saying he purges with moimoi, it's just an excuse.

It is difficult to cook 2 foods, i will not stop making moimoi or beans because of him, my kids like the meal so much. For the fact that he buys it out there and this food is what we usually enjoy together before now, i cant stop cooking it.

He has in many ways abused me, he is not someone I should even go the extra mile for, he doesnt sacrifice for me, he doesn't respect me, he doesn't stay close to me except when he wants se. X, always going out. He is very scarce at home. I can't cook 2 foods on days i cook moimoi or beans.

And for telling me my duties are just 2 in his life, I feel abused for allowing him have se. X with me all these while, i feel like a kitchen tool for cooking for him. His intentions and motives about a women are so demeaning.

I am feeling so ashamed of myself. He place no value on me.

but about the emotional abuse I believe you might have noticed it before marriage and you ignored it well I will not blame you, I want you to be bold to tell him politely that you don't like his behavior, just pour out your grievances to him, and if he doesn't change then involve a second party(someone he respects) don't give up on your marriage cus you guys are blessed with kids.

Bottom line na moimoi and beans. They caused problem for ina house. We need to arrest moimoi and beans OP abeg give me their numbers

RightToReject:



Should I descend on you now, it will seem as if I take pleasure in oppressing small-minded elements like you. With this your response to my post, you either left your brain offline before coming online or you have an outright low IQ, given that my moniker bears a male symbol, and nowhere in my post did I state being otherwise.

Scram before I change my mind and descend on you heavily. Bumpkin.

You can only descend on any unfortunate fool and simp that has married and tolerating your nonsense.
I'm absolutely sure that you have a vagina. I don't need you, anyone or a thing to prove it...
I'm too big for in all ramifications. Try me !

OriOko88:
You too should stop cooking him moi moi if he says he doesn't like it. A Yoruba adage says, A soup which d husband doesnt like,the wife doesn't cook. You can prepare d moi moi for the kids and you,then prepares his own favorite too. That's d why i don't buy the idea of making time table for food. Why must I be eating a particular food for a specified day. Take for example,why must I eat rice on Saturdays because it's what on the time table..like wtf. A man must eat varieties of food when he so desires.

I think he's frustrated by the boring foods you giving him..spice up ur food and see him change. Ask him what he would like the family to eat before cooking..ditch the food time table for nw. How many men dey eat moi moi these days??
Change ur food time table and see u having ur man back

What is preventing him from cooking for the family?

Cook daily food for family. Anyone who doesn't want to eat due to being picky should drink water.

armyofone:
What is preventing him from cooking for the family?

Cook daily food for family. Anyone who doesn't want to eat due to being picky should drink water.

Imagine that. It isn't that th woman does not have her own job and stuff to deal with outside much as the man has. If him no like the food or taste, he can simply enter the kitchen at least one day a week to cook for what is own family as well or buy moi-moi from outside so they can all eat together and see if that works for all.

Wives also like to eat their husband's food. So I don't why he cannot cook on at least one day of the week for his family. They both work so, it isn't like there is any reason why she should work and still carry it all on her head.

Fist lady no kill herself when him husband bubu tell her she belongs to the ozer rooms and kitchen, why you wan come kill yourself this woman

I don't understand you can't cook two food a day, if u know he does not eat moi moi as you said but u cooked it basically for the children, why can't u just prepare want you know he will like to eat to avoid creating issues where there's none?

Saidu22:
I don't understand you can't cook two food a day, if u know he does not eat moi moi as you said but u cooked it basically for the children, why can't u just prepare want you know he will like to eat to avoid creating issues where there's none?

She works just as he also works. So why can't he cook the meal he wants on that day instead?

There is clearly an issue here that goes deeper than the plate of moimoi she serves him only once a week, and that issue is one that has relegated this woman to only being of value when it has to do with sex and food for this man. She is not one we would consider a liability in the marriage so why go that far to insult her?

Women...una dey try o... ...

U must be a terrible cook, u only know how to prepare moi and not moi moi!

highbee02:
U must be a terrible cook, u only know how to prepare moi and not moi moi!

If she is a terrible cook, why can't he enter the kitchen and cook in her stead? They both work, according to her story, so why can't he at least contribute his own share to cooking for his own family at least once a week?

davidugboaja:
For me, the man has stated the problem he is having, food and sex. I know the way he communicated it is wrong but the problem has been stated.

For the food, to me is not the major problem, but sex, yes it is.

If you can be sincere, i believe the man has asked for sex more than once and you have turn him down ( more than 4 occasions ).

I know its not easy for you, the work, the kids, and the house work then add up with sex.

So, the solution, forgive him with the way he talked to you, remove the bitterness

Give him better sex and apologize

Try and find a better way to explain to him why you have turn down on him when he needed sex (after the birth of your kids, have you ever initiated for sex or he is the one making the move always?), then you too should find a better to easy your duties so as to be free to give him sex.

My opinion sha

All waiting I dey read for this one comment na just sex . na only the sex aspect interest you abi SMH

When I read some stories about couples online, I just find it difficult to comprehend.


Honestly, I see no issue here. And I really just cant understand men that make trouble about food, ordinary food lol. Food is the last thing that will cause me trouble. My wife kukuma knows I don't even like eating, I am highly selective and I don't ever bother my wife about what I eat cos I never married her cos of food. Why should a man marry cos of food in our present world where all manner of delicious dishes can be ordered online and it will be delivered to you even before you blink an eye.


Dear Nigerian men una need to wake up na, cooking skill should be removed from the list of qualities to marry a lady today. Replace cooking skill with another quality like money management, financial productivity and wisdom, ability to create enduring wealth and not just squandering money on frivolous wants and wishes. These are more valuable qualities to marry a lady for not cooking and cleaning.



I really don't like men that love food so much, its a sign of poverty and poor vision. A man of vision, a man of great destiny doesn't place so much value on food and drink, he only takes them to sustain his strength and energy to carry out his daily duties.



Ladies be wary of men that love food and drink so much during courtship. I am a man thst have hundreds of friends and business/political associates and I can tell you that men that cherish food and drink so much are not always successful, and even if they become financially successful by destiny, it doesn't last. They rarely become wealthy.


Acquiring wealth comes with lots of self sacrifices and one of them is ability to control your craving for food and drink.



Cooking or food only cause problem for below average families not enlightened and success-driven couple.



Op your hubby no try but then, this issue is not hard to solve since you know he doesn't like eating the moi moi, stop forcing him to take it. Please ditch that your food timetable for your husband, you can keep it for your kids but a man's taste changes hourly or daily. You don't force a grown up man that can afford whatever he desires to eat to eat a particular food at set intervals, it can only work on a broke man with no other options.


If you are working and earning, get a domestic help to assist you in doing some of the domestic jobs around your house so you can have the time and strength to prepare your husband's faborite meals when he desires them.

Dksmile:
Fist lady no kill herself when him husband bubu tell her she belongs to the ozer rooms and kitchen, why you wan come kill yourself this woman

And that was part of the reason a whole First Lady of a country left her husband who is the country's President to live abroad with her kids, leaving the husband in their home country, a president's wife. In which other country have you heard about such happen except in Nigeria and under Buhari's regime?


Buhari is a complete compound failure.




Nigeria's First Lady lives abroad, how does that sound to you; normal?

franchasofficia:
And that was part of the reason a whole First Lady of a country left her husband who is the country's President to live abroad with her kids, leaving the husband in their home country, a president's wife. In which other country have you heard about such happening except in Nigeria and under Buhari's regime?
Buhari is a complete compound failure
Nigeria's First Lady lives abroad, how does that sound to you; normal?

NO mind people! Na so dem go romanticize even the most inane of things when they think it suits them to, forgetting the world is not as foolish as they are.

Lalakas:
Am not happy with my husband's utterances towards me. He unapologetically told me my duties are just 2: to give him se. X and to cook. This guy has really hurt me in this marriage, he seems not to know how to talk.

I work and equally contribute to everything. I dont hide my income and i give him for the building we are both building. I am not useless and i am not a liability to him.

How it all started :
Moimoi or beans is for every other Friday or Saturday ( moimoi could be ones in 6 weeks except my kids specially ask for it) but for a while now whenever I prepare any of the 2 he would complain, regect it. He told me he doesn't like them during the week and I will never prepare them Sunday to Thursday. Friday because he won't be going to work the following day. My kids like eating moimoi very well, infact, it is one their best meals. Atimes, they ask for it. My husband sees moimoi and beans as crap. Guys, he buys it and eat it outside!, my moimoi doesn't purge anyone of us. Even him but he'd keep saying he purges with moimoi, it's just an excuse.

It is difficult to cook 2 foods, i will not stop making moimoi or beans because of him, my kids like the meal so much. For the fact that he buys it out there and this food is what we usually enjoy together before now, i cant stop cooking it.

He has in many ways abused me, he is not someone I should even go the extra mile for, he doesnt sacrifice for me, he doesn't respect me, he doesn't stay close to me except when he wants se. X, always going out. He is very scarce at home. I can't cook 2 foods on days i cook moimoi or beans.

And for telling me my duties are just 2 in his life, I feel abused for allowing him have se. X with me all these while, i feel like a kitchen tool for cooking for him. His intentions and motives about a women are so demeaning.

I am feeling so ashamed of myself. He place no value on me.

Na wao, devil too much oo... See how ordinary moimoi and beans want to wreck a beautiful home. E no go work for the devil in Jesus name. Sexx and food? No problem, you go fuxk tire. You no want moi moi, no problem, I go dey do am for my kids. Tell me, what is the problem again... OK he said women no get value, ok sir. Men are get value... What is the problem again? He is scarce from home... Honey pls come back I Wan fukckk, stop staying out late. Remember my only job is to fukckk and cook, pls I want to be efficient. Stop staying out late.

showafrica:
Na wao, devil too much oo... See how ordinary moimoi and beans want to wreck a beautiful home. E no go work for the devil in Jesus name. Sexx and food? No problem, you go fuxk tire. You no want moi moi, no problem, I go dey do am for my kids. Tell me, what is the problem again... OK he said women no get value, ok sir. Men are get value... What is the problem again? He is scarce from home... Honey pls come back I Wan Bleep, stop staying out late. Remember my only job is to Bleep and cook, pls I want to be efficient. Stop staying out late.

Oh, she should abandon her work, so she brings no longer contributes her share to her family too make the husband come open mouth gbagada come dey label her liability next abi?

Kobojunkie:
Oh, she should abandon her work, so she brings no longer contributes her share to her family too make the husband come open mouth gbagada come dey label her liability next abi?

I didn't read that line... The hubby didn't call her liability. He said the work of a woman is is to cook and fkukk. Her job description is simple compared to other gangster fathers. Just give them man the fuckkk and food and go your work. Would you prefer the woman put work before family? No, work is important but family first.

showafrica:
I didn't read that line... The hubby didn't call her liability. He said the work of a woman is is to cook and fuxkkk. Her job description is simple compared to other gangster fathers. Just give them man the Bleep and food and go your work. Would you prefer the woman put work before family? No, work is important but family first.

You said her only job to him should be sex and food... meaning she abandon everything else and exist for that purpose alone, abi?

You claim it is family first as if you are blind to fact that family does not work if there is no steady source of income to make sure family is properly cared for. You claim family first when there are many men out unable to adequately provide for their families and quick to shove the blame at their wives who do no work outside of the home?

You have a man and a woman, both of them working, and she is already carrying a lot on her plate, this while her husband carries less on his plate. Yet you still demand the woman sacrifice even more for his ego's sake, why? Why not ask the man to get his head and ego checked to be sure it is in the right order to begin with?

BRATISLAVA:


Yeah, while he goes to buy the food he doesn't eat at home from his outdoor girlfriend.

Nigerian women are coping with a lot. SMH.

So you know for sure that he has an outdoor girlfriend, you know the girlfriend and you also know she sells food!
I hope there are concrete proofs for these allegations!

EponOjuku:
You don't know how lucky you are that it is food causing problem in your house and not hunger causing problem.

If you don't like what he says to you, tell him instead of brooding over it and allowing it eat you up.

That is not a reason to talk to a fellow human as if she is a piece of crap picked up from the dustbin... we shouldn't condone nonsense all in the name of keeping marriage. A friend was showing signs of this bad manner of talking to his girl friend and I told him that it is a VERY bad attitude as a man.

HustlePro:
That is not a reason to talk to a fellow human as if she is a piece of crap picked up from the dustbin... we shouldn't condone nonsense all in the name of keeping marriage. A friend was showing signs of this bad manner of talking to his girl friend and I told him that it is a VERY bad attitude as a man.

Most of these don't understand such things at all. Marriage to them is godhood for the man and the woman's place is to bend over backwards to maintain that seat for them.

I am telling you, and it's very bad!

wis3:
For man to tell woman say she's only for cooking and se.x shows he has lost whatever regards he has for her.

Hummm... Oppor. Thanks jare

Kobojunkie:
Stop that nonsense! The man eats moi-moi outside but bullies his wife over the same.On top of that, he speaks down to her telling her she is only for sex and cooking. Don't need to be a rocket scientist to realize this is more than just about beans and moi-moi.

Hummm..another angle!

Blessedmercy8:
Sorry to say but you're being stubborn to the man.

Your husband can not just wake up and say those things to you. You must have done something that annoyed him to make him say such, prolly to get back at you.

Now, reason I said you're being stubborn is, you know he doesn't like your moimoi, yet you keep making it. As in... Let him do his worse. Abi na?

If you truly care and respect him, you would stop but here you are telling us you can never stop making it because your children like it. By that you're already saying he should go to hell for all you care and he too gets the message reason he chose to be careless with words too.

You claim he buys it outside. What does that tell you? Yours is prolly not as fanimorous ( sorry to say). Now, what have you done to improve your moimoi because there is moimoi and there is mai-mai **chuckles** .
My dad too hated moimoi to the extent that one day after he dropped money for food and asked what we want to prepare, we all chorused moimoi (because we children loved moimoi) and he said "moimoi gbuo gi" that is, "moimoi Kee you". There and then we knew we have tormented this man with this food. So we prepared his favorite, rice and stew.

You need to calm down for your man. You chose to marry him in the first place, so do anything that will make him happy. Coming here after how many children to say you feel ashamed of yourself for letting him sleep with you makes no sense because you too have been sleeping with him. so both of you have used each other. No biggies. Forget and move on.

Look for how to spice up your moimoi. Prepare it for only your children, (give him what he wants) let him perceive your new moimoi, he'll be the one requesting for it.

You don't have to prepare it the same day you're making other meals. You can just make the moimoi on your free days and pack in the fridge for your children so you don't get to overwork yourself.