MufasaLion:
You don't need such a stupid, lazy, insensitive and selfish man in your life or your kids'. Move on and continue to provide for yourself and your kids. He abandoned you for months and was trying to manipulate you emotionally when you went to pack things, don't be deceived.

Don't let his family's plead to deceive you. That man can never change. That's his personality and once you go back and deliver that baby, you will be trapped!

You can do well without him! Marriage is not an achievement. There are many successful people in the world raised by single mothers. Don't let the society define your happiness!

The man will find another woman to marry or not even marry and she'll be the loser.

Just because he stole your ₦200,000 does not mean you should still keep grudge with him, look at the past and see the good things he has done for you, it will be far more than the money he took from you fraudulently, just forgive and forget and never remember it again, since he has begged you to come back, it's better you go back to him, but the idea of you talking back at your husband is lack of respect.

MufasaLion:


Brother, I never wanted to respond to any mentions but I decided to respond to you.

No, it's not because of 200k. It's because of breach of trust and how it even happened. Irrespective of how genuine your reason(s) might be, there are things you shouldn't do to people that trust you, most especially your partner! He was trying to be a smart-ass, with no shame. A partner that could do such to you, would do more than that, if he's got the chance to rip you off more money. Also, the man even ignored her until she went home to pack out! That shows how unremorseful he was. He didn't respect their union, no trust and being nonchalant!

Even if he needed money desperately and his wife was more buoyant, why couldn't he talk to his wife? Why are they couples when they can't be each other's helper?

He's the type of human that will rip you off at any given chance without considering the relationship, friendship or ties between you both! He's the type of person that relatives abroad will trust to manage their property or constructions but will end up squandering the money or do inferior project.

I advised that woman based on the information she provided and I was just being honest. I'm not perfect but I have some dignity! I'm not a hypocrite, I like to call a spade a spade.

I understand you perfectly but I feel no marriage that's successful that did not pass through trials.

She should see this as a defining moment to win over her marriage. If people divorce for issues as this trust me the divorce rate will triple in space of a year.

She should forgive and make peace with her husband for the sake of her marriage and children..

God bless you Chief.

Romanoff:


Rotfl.

Marriage wey we done dey for years?

Tell that to small small girls that you're hoping to use one yeye marriage to keep in bondage.

Not a grown woman who married a man with sense and married with intentionality.

Shior.

You been married for years but you want another woman to break her marriage just cos of a minor issue involving 200k? So your husband has never offended you within all that years?? smh
May we never end up with people who are not kind or people who don’t have a forgiven spirit.

Why in the first place will the wife wanted to purchase a separate property?what God had joined together don't let possessing of properties diffently turns it apart biko.in marriage 1+1 isn't equal to 2 it's 1 the word of God says both husband and wife are naked & they were not ashamed the unclothedness here means they are open to one another.its a pity today a lot of family are passing through a lot because husband and wife don trust each other.God almighty will help every family experiencing storm in Jesus name Amen

redseason:


Most sensible comment!
Your husband’s sin is stealing from his wife. It’s shameful cos it’s like stealing from your own self! That aside;
You never saw yourself as part of his team. You wanted to conceal your selfishness, but the self in you still could not be totally masked. You could glorify the occasional 100k, 50k, 20k you put in the house project. Mama, you are not the first! And fyi, in terms of ratio, your contribution will most definitely amount to less than 5% of entire project cost. A modest 3 bedroom house will gulf at least 15m.
So many missing dots; is the family house solely in his name or your both names, because I now wonder the rationale you wanted something solely on your name alone? Has this husband been a provider or a deadbeat? Who bought your car? Have you ever misappropriated funds he gave to you? Got married at 22, did you move into his house with money or he set you up?

Best set of advice ever �
Best advice needed is here madam
Man have never been to themselves alone, 90% of money man worried about is for people around him

Last last Your husband would still use that money to fend for bills or other things in the family

Consider yourself been the husband while you spend every money you make just to make things better,
You got married at 22 and life was rossy but you did not acknowledge this young man effort making things right

Did your family set up the business for you or this man set you up ?
To be honest I’m on this man side
We heard your own side of the story but if we hear the man side of the story then you would realize you particular needs counseling about marriage

What if your husband is broke won’t you assist him

Romanoff:


She is not toxic. Her concerns are valid and no two human is the same.

Just cause it will be easy for you to forgive such dishonesty doesn't mean it will be easy for her.
With a husband that can scam you like that, who needs an enemy? A wife that has always supported you and is equally hardworking. What is in common 200k that he still had to scam her for?

They sha both need counselling to get past this, it won't be easy but it's doable.

That trust has been broken already so after this, going forward, please, have your own savings as you contribute to the home and family projects and keep receipts.

Next land or property you'll buy, inform him about it, carry him along but source for your own agent yourself to avoid situations like this.

The trust can't be the same again sha, but na to dey manage the situation and to avoid such in the future.

guy don't comment on marriage topics when you are not married, look at the kind of advice you are giving, are you okay?if she is to follow your advice then it is no longer marriage and I doubt any man can take that nonsense,if I tell you my own experience in marriage maybe you will advise me to sue my wife in court,as far as it is not infidelity or domestic violence,guy you must forgive, yes people from both parties will deliberate on the matter and resolve it by blaming the person at fault and warning against reoccurrence of such onless you plan to be a single parent because the next person you intend to marry may even be worse then regret will set in,this is what happens when there is no love in the marriage, everything na arrangement so in that case you will find it difficult to forgive each other

Please continue your life, you moved out yourself, don't worry he'll soon have a second wife and next the lawyers would send you divorce papers, keep listening to yourself and your folks.
Then you too would join the street and start searching for a soul mate.

gozy121:

You been married for years but you want another woman to break her marriage just cos of a minor issue involving 200k? So your husband has never offended you within all that years?? smh
May we never end up with people who are not kind or people who don’t have a forgiven spirit.

You are blind o.

It's either you're blind or have some serious comprehension issues.

Go back to my comment and please, point where I said she should break her marriage.

As per offending a spouse, if your wife commits adultery, forgive her and move on like nothing happened.

We all have several deal breakers and the woman has a right to feel the way she does.

I proffered a solution to how they can get past it but you chose to have selective blindness in that part of my comment.

He stole from you....his wife
You caught the thief
The thief begged you his wife
You refused​ to forgive 200k
You could have but you have money demon inside you
You could have completely owned him hence forth....he sold himself for 200k!
You did not have the sense...


The beginning of the end...

He can only beg or return the money....but
You inform family
You embarrassed your husband and marriage...200k
He could have begged at your sister's place if he had cheated,he would, I swear....
200k??...he be ashamed! ashamed!...
You father say don't go back...lol...slide
You your marriage on the spike for 200k!
Money demon Na bastard...
You could have owned that man.... quietly.. silently...he go wash plate tire...all Na sense

Now you rented a place first before going back to your house....with 200k?
Look madam...you are even pregnant!



Ok now.... explain this thing to God..see if you would make one sense!


Advice..
Tell everybody body to back off the matter..
Tell your parents, siblings, father!,his family... everybody!....back off...
Tell your husband,...never speak of it again!....okay??...I've forgiven you...I blew it out of proportion...but don't apologize for Shi Shi....
Go on with your marriage and children..
Have safe delivery...Amen!...Amin!



I have spoken.

Olubi15:
Hi

Hi

If I happened to be op and I discovered this, I won't loud it, I will make sure I get all my money back low key even if its take 1yr, atleast we are husband & wife. I know how I will get him. Woman no wise

vugaman:
guy don't comment on marriage topics when you are not married, look at the kind of advice you are giving, are you okay?if she is to follow your advice then it is no longer marriage and I doubt any man can take that nonsense,if I tell you my own experience in marriage maybe you will advise me to sue my wife in court,as far as it is not infidelity or domestic violence,guy you must forgive, yes people from both parties will deliberate on the matter and resolve it by blaming the person at fault and warning against reoccurrence of such onless you plan to be a single parent because the next person you intend to marry may even be worse then regret will set in,this is what happens when there is no love in the marriage, everything na arrangement so in that case you will find it difficult to forgive each other

I am married. And there's nothing wrong with my comment.

I offered advice on how they can get past the issue they have, I didn't ask her to leave her marriage.

And I stand by what I said, once trust is broken, it's hard to get back.

What happened ,to her and her husband is not enough to end their marriage, I don't know where you saw that I said that.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Your major problem is you dont understand that marriage is a union. This is not a relationship, this is a marriage. You are supposed to be your husband's Blanket and cover his shame. Now u come dey shame am cuz he nor get money. If the man has money he will do for you without blinking an eye.

he even begged you, you are feeling like you are more than what you are, on top ordinary 200k o, A man that can still make it and dash u 2 Billion naira when GOD finally answers his prayers.

instead of you to be there for him in trying times, you are busy dealing with him, This is somebody u sleep with o someone u know in and out that he wont betray u no matter what , he is not just a random person on the street that u have no loyalty to.

Men una see why we dont rely on a woman for anything, A woman's money she will shame you, but they knw how to chop our money and feel like it is their birth right, can u imagine this woman. May GOD not give me a wife that will shame me and not cover my shame/

Imagine the man didnt even cheat on u o, he is loyal to you He ate ur money, how much ordinary 200k . and u dey cry. see this wonan
how much of his money have u eaten that he didnt complain nor shame u for?. These women enh. wahala no dey finish o

You are immature and proud and that is not an insult. Your Dad doesn't also sound like a God man.
Get a marriage counsellor, arrange for counselling, invite your husband and with this new attitude of his, he will come and mend this relationship. Go back to your house as this your high headedness will not be very beneficial to you if you continue like this.

Don't blame yourself too much, you are young and selfish that's y u think like this, in few years time matter go change

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

It's like you are the one controlling your husband. You should have collaborated with your husband to buy the property.

GoldCircle:
The institution of marriage requires a lot of patience and perseverance. From your write up, it is obvious you haven't fully healed. Healing (from broken trust) is usually an organic process and not one to be rushed. I will advise that you take time to heal while bearing in mind that to err is human. Learn to forgive especially if he is remorseful. Make a conscious effort to pray to God to give you the spirit of forgiveness. It helps.

Your kids indeed need their father around them. he hasn't offended them. BTW, every person has his/her own palava. What is the guarantee that the next man that you will meet wouldn't be worse than your husband.

Calm down and return to your husband. I believe he should have learnt his lessons.

Goodluck!

Has he given her the 200k back.
That is the first step to reconciliation. True apology is not by mouth and African magic drama, but by actions

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

No insult please, I have cried enough.

This letting go of the past thing is not easy at all, I've been there, took me about 5 years to get over it, in my case I lost N7m to people I trusted. Guys were literally coming to me to give consent to have the guy and his family killed. Never agreed. When I see the guy today I greet him as an elder and like nothing happened.

Life must progress forward. Whatever mistake you have made in the past you must forgive yourself first and then your husband.

You already have kids together, do not endanger and ruin the lives of your kids because of 200k.

Go back to your husband and settle. You must pour out your heart to him and ask for a refund of the money. Until you get that money, you can decide never to give him any money again. You can also forget the money and just move on. Learn from your mistake, apply the lessons gained as you move forward.

You have to apologise to your husband too for the nasty things you said, this is a 2 side thing.

Marriage is not a trophy or achievement that people should rush into when they are not prepared. It is not just about finding a financially stable person but are the 2 people mature enough to live in peace and not seek opportunities to exploit each other.

When a person decides to marry, it means they have seen a person they are ready to do anything for, to share with unconditionally. This feeling must be mutual else you end up making small situations look bigger than they are.

Go to your husband and make peace.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Your dad sorry to say is a foolish Man for advising You not to forgive . Well the decision is yours to make

Maxhappy01:

Don't deceive her her and try to bring Feminism into the matter.I am sure you're not married.

u are actually the one talking about feminism here...trust and love is a prerequisite for marriage....once it dies,divorce is allowed even in the Bible.. where there is no love na death remain there.... Na mumu u be

Madam your hot tamper is too much wish needed to be control so that it wouldn't affect Your Children. The money you have is your husband money whereas his money is yours too.You shouldn't have park out Rather you should have learn how to be careful on issues concerning money with him.I will advice you to return to your husband house with immediate effect,b4 he Changes his mind.You see if it's me I will not welcome you back again,That person that advice you to park you have to stick with it till my children grows I come and take them.He has apologize but your still adamant,that shows you didn't love the man neither your Children even unborn child woman your heartless.Go and apologize to the man bcus you have offended him if you truly love him that is the highest weapon you have now to conquer.

He said...let's build as a family...coz you can finance it (..and coz of your trust issues) you decided to buy alone in your name and his surname...(something wey court go split during divorce)

Well, he decided to be an independent housing agent and collect his agent fee.

It's no longer family ish...it's just business.
He wasn't being dishonest, that's his percentage.

Stop snooping into a man's phone...you go always find something to twist.

That being said, if that's his only crime, then you can forgive him.

Na that loyalty and respect wey men dey ask for be this....be loyal and respect them.
You bruised his pride, when you attempted to put a roof over his head...in your name.
And then, you also highlighted trust issues within you or your marriage.
There's something wrong somewhere.

That lack of trust is the reason you wanted your own house.
The same lack of trust is the reason you went snooping.
Lack of trust is the reason you don't want to forgive....to you, you have just confirmed the nudge of mistrust you have been having towards him.

Mistrust is the issue you need to confront.

Kids in marriages of today... Small thing una don run commot 4 home tueh.

Ayemileto:






Have you thought of the possibility that the land seller might be giving referral commission normal normal, and not necessarily that the husband planned it with him/her?


Getting commission for referring people is something common in our society today, and you don't have to plan it with any seller to get the commission. In fact, most people already include price for paying referral commission as part of their goods price. This is the reason why you'll see stuffs like, "Refer someone and get X amount".

For all we know, there might not be any "conspiracy to defraud" her. The seller could have sent him the commission, as he might have done if any other person he refers buys a land.

You guys will never cease to amaze me on NL, would you collect commission for referral from referring your wife/ husband?

Let's even say it was a commission what stops him to say, he gave me money oo but me I Don chop am and they will laugh over it.

What is wrong with you people?

All these stories, it was not infidelity that broke the camel's back,why can't you forgive and forget , please leave us alone.

without problems men na nothing,really don't see much here except for pride and ego .these re things men pass through everyday ,even paying rent in their wives house without knowing .well,wish us well .

Some of you young ladies actually think single parenting is fun. Even if you have all the money, my dear you will suffer emotionally and it will tell on your children, not forgetting the stigmatization from society and the needless explanations you and your children will make.

Forgiveness is the first key in any relationship.
If you like, continue to beef with your husband, the dude will easily move on.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Taking a look at the look of things from his action and your explanation, you both love each other. Your husband attitude at retrieval of that money is not as deeply thought you did. Just forgive him and let go of it. Two wrongs can never make a right. The longer you stress this the bitter you become and the worsen the family situation become.
If I were you ,you should have acted as hubby you don't need to do this to get money from me. We are both help meet. He would have apologized from the deepest feelings of his emotion. I have learned that many a time that I deal with cases the otherwise people expected, I feel relieved.
Lastly, I know it hurt been disappointed by a loved or trusted fellow yet it's bound to happen at times but effort to make things right again has it all.

Alwaysachick:



Have you imagined bringing a business proposal to a close relative which you think will benefit you and him if he buys the idea, only for this relative because he has the finance, tells you he wants the business all to himself, leaving you out of it.

So you don't mind giving this idea to this selfish relative of yours who isn't considering you. You will just dash him your aspirations without anything.

That was the case of this couple. The woman is wicked and self centered. The husband felt hurt and the only way he could let go was to see it as transactional.

Please free the man. If you were that man with the relative, you will involve a lawyer and sell your idea at a fee. And if this doesn't happen and your relatives goes ahead with this business without your consent, I bet you will be sworn enemies if you have an unforgiving spirit like OP.

The husband didn't have the money from what I read.. she had it and she didn't want to finance something and the man takes credit for it. Read her future plans about having a small house with her husband for her kids.

A man should find a way to have his own money. She is not wicked in any way.

emorse:

E no go better for trust. A friend was gisting me recently about how his wife saved money from their monthly upkeep (which was barely enough) and loaned him part of it when he went flat broke. Guess what, after things stabilised, he paid her back! Imagine that. His own money o. This man told this story with a big grin on his face. E reach woman turn, family scatter. I say again, e no go better for trust.

The man should have been up front about that extra fees...

Well, to me, as far as I didn’t cheat on my wife or subject her to domestic violence, the day she park her things out of my house, for any reason aside from the two I mentioned, is the day we stop being couple. Women are being spending their hubbies money from the beginning of time without any issues. You’re making unnecessary fuss just because your husband spent your money. You never trusted him from the beginning, that’s why you sent the money directly to the seller, and not to your husband. You also have ego issue, by saying you want a land in your name when you’re legally married. Your hubby trusted you to some extent, reason why you can access his phone. It’s true that when a woman makes money, she start thinking she doesn’t need a man. All these working class women and their wahala sef. Go and marry yourself ma’am.

advanceDNA:


Its her money at the end of the day....so she has a right to be angry....but ending her marriage over this is a bit of an overkill

Many of us did it to our parents ....
My babe does it to me irregularly...

I wholeheartedly agree with you. Infact in most marriages, inflating prices to scam is very common. We see our mothers do it to our father and our wives are doing it to us now. That doesn't make it right! Ending your marriage because of that is an OVERKILL, I don't think it should be that deep. I also, maybe think she's doing this because she has her own money but to raise a family is not an easy task, you need more than just some few thousand or million in d bank.. Believe me, you will fizzle out. Your man/woman will hurt you over and over again, you must keep forgiving as much as its in your power to do so..That is your own strength!
As for OP, if your parent or anyone is asking you to leave, pls know that its because they think and know you have money. If you go broke tomorrow, they will help you pack your bags to your husband's house.