HantaVirus:


At 47, I am unmarried and unbothered

Happiness is key to me Not getting married or giving birth.

Yes o. That's because you didn't let societal standards or expectations determine/dictate your state of happiness. I tend to live within my own convenience, shutting out any unnecessary pressure.

CheapHomes1:


Marriage is for things that you say it isn't for. The fact that certain people use it the wrong way doesn't change it's purpose. That's why the late Myles Munroe said "when purpose is unknown, abuse is inevitable". Don't blame marriage for not working. Blame people for not knowing the purpose of marriage. Someone like you doesn't understand it's purpose. By the time you get in and start failing, you will start blaming the marriage

But does that purpose even make sense to you

Why do I have to toil day and night to become a suitable marriageable man just so I can get another individual who would become my "companion" in this world so full of people

Conner44:
No It’s not love is what matters and not marriage. Two people can marry without an ounce of love between them. Many people do it mostly for selfish reasons these days.

If anyone uses marriage to boast as an achievement in front of you just tell them to travel small and head north. There they will see girls of 15 years old getting married left-right and center to people they do not even know. 80 year old men with over 10 lawfully wedded wives living from hand to mouth and still eyeing one small girl to add to his harem.

Or what about the south where you’d experience a high rate of divorce and wanton infidelity. Small girls birthing bastards and still waiting for one man to come from nowhere to put a ring on it men leaving their wives alone at home and sleeping in brothels.

What about the village that was discovered in Cross River State where people give small girls to settle debts??

Real talk...the whole marriage concept is a societal arrangement thought to control the human population.

But can't human population be controlled by other means?

And what would be wrong if some women don't give birth...of course, many women out there don't give birth whether married or unmarried...so, there's something cynical about this societal arrangement.

Just thinking...

KennethEnyi:





Omo this one make sense o

MikeofAfrica:


The issue is that in Africa where majority of the young men see marriage as an achievement, they spend their youthful days thinking and working for marriage.
Hence once they get married, they feel fulfilled and have no future ambition.

Mainwhile, their counterparts in Europe and America who are not passionate about marriage are daily thinking of how they will break new grounds in business and science.
For them, marriage can even be neglected if it will become a hindrance to their carrier.

Out of these two categories of youths, which did you think will be more successful in this world?

Marriage can never be a hindrance. It is a blessing when you have a good partner. Those who are breaking new grounds are married with kids and if they are divorced,they are on their way to another marriage. Elon musk is married with kids,Mark is married with kids,Dangote is married with kids,Otedola is married with kids e.tc . Marriage can never be a hindrance. With a good partner,you will achieve more.
A failed marriage shouldnt define marriage.

Jman06:
But does that purpose even make sense to you

Why do I have to toil day and night to become a suitable marriageable man just so I can get another individual who would become my "companion" in this world so full of people

If the purpose of marriage doesn't make sense to you, why do you think it shouldn't make sense to me. If you don't want it to make sense to you, that's your choice. Like I said, when folks like eventually get in and start failing at it, you start blaming the marriage.

Who asked you become a "suitable marriageable man just so you can get another individual who would become your 'companion' in this world so full of people"?

Flamemignon1:

You do realize this is the 21st century right? You don't need to be married or have kids to curb loneliness,just because someone is lonely doesn't mean they are alone. You could be in the midst of people and still feel lonely

except you want born bastard ,

Don't go and marry
Be deceiving urself

Kobojunkie:
Stop lying to folks because you are afraid to be alone..

nope when you hit 50 reality sets in , with age comes regrets , wait a little ,you will soon be there

Kobojunkie:
So that man who jumped in the River and drowned himself sometime this year didn't have love when he looked into his child's eyes daily? Or was the child some sort of emere that deprived his Father of this love you speak of?

ask his wife

Jman06:
Story for the gods!


I have two elder brothers who are married. I also have neighbors, friends and acquaintances who are married as well. Therefore my post stems from what I see happening around me.

You are even single No wonder.
Until you are married, you don't have the rite to contribute to topics like this

Marry first

CheapHomes1:


Which one is "carrier"?

Marriage is an achievement anywhere in the world. There are many successful married men and women in Africa and in the west so I don't know where you got your theory from that marriage hinders professional success

Two friends , James and Paul, graduated from the University of Lagos same year. They did not get their dream jobs after school hence they both began teaching in a private school in Lagos.

James was still determine to get his dream job in an oil company. Hence he saved his salary for five years and proceed for a PG course related to Oil and Gas. He passed the course and later got his dream job.

Mainwhile, Paul who graduated with a better grade at UniLag got married while teaching at the Private School. He spent a lot of money in organizing a wedding party that meets his wife taste.

Paul also had to rent a better apartment .
After the marriage, his wife's two young siblings moved into his apartment. Even though his wife was paying her siblings school fees, Paul was responsible for their feedings and other needs. Nine months later, his wife gave birth giving him the main responsibility.

Hence by the time, James enrolled for the PG course, Paul was interested but had no money. He has to kill the dream to meet his family responsibility.

I hope you can see how marriage before fulfilling your purpose on Earth can prevent you from fulfilling your purpose on Earth.

If you say no be achievement na achievement. If you say na achievement no be achievement. Depend on the degree of condescension and pride person take pronounce.

MikeofAfrica:


The issue is that in Africa where majority of the young men see marriage as an achievement, they spend their youthful days thinking and working for marriage.
Hence once they get married, they feel fulfilled and have no future ambition.

Mainwhile, their counterparts in Europe and America who are not passionate about marriage are daily thinking of how they will break new grounds in business and science.
For them, marriage can even be neglected if it will become a hindrance to their carrier.

You're right about this. Marriage is far more optional/expendable in the developed world than in this part. And it's interesting to know that they don't stigmatise or look down on the unmarried as we mostly do here, where the greater majority see it as an achievement.

godofuck231:
nope when you hit 50 reality sets in , with age comes regrets , wait a little ,you will soon be there

None of that is in fact a truth. The world now records so many single folks above 50 who don't operate under the delusion of yours there. So rather than focus on blaming externals for your loneliness issues, look inside of you to figure out where the problem you have there with loneliness.

godofuck231:
ask his wife

now you rope his wife into it?

Marriage is an achievement o. Let's not deceive ourselves.

Do you know what it takes to convince another human being to be with you indefinitely till you two die?

Guy... Reason am.

Abi1985:
Na marry you marry, don't come and be disturbing those who are not married. Just because you marry today does not mean you are better than those who are not married.

Please do not let your friend wedding oppress you, some married people are suffering and smiling. They will not tell you that the wife they marry na Jezebel associate or a runs girl or the husband they marry is a womanizer or an abusive man. They will do one big wedding today, then 9 months or 3 years later they divorce.

Personally I enjoy weddings because I can eat some correct food.

If your people are asking when are you getting married? Tell them when you do not want marry a Jezebel or a wicked or selfish man. Because after the wedding, you are on your own.

Na so they arrange one woman from village for me to marry, I just dey laugh and ignore. I enjoyed my bachelorhood, please let me enjoy my life. I do not want problem.

Marry when you want marry, do not let anyone pressure you to marry or who you will marry.

OP, Nigerians are scammers, therefore i dont want to associate with any Nigerian, all fulanis are terrorist hence i will never be friends with any fulani man. That is generalization. Go and marry , leave stories.

Bobbiee:
Marriage is for the propagation of the species and to ensure controlled population. Think about it.

You marry so that you can breed kids. You stay married and are expected to be faithful to your spouse. Else, you would be at liberty to sire children with multiple spouses as many as possible. There's only so many children a single woman can give birth to. Men stay fertile all the way to old age. Without the institution of marriage, many men would have over 100 children walking around.

Any other reason is totally useless and born out of sentiments and societal expectations. Is it companionship you seek? That's what family and friends are for? Is it constant sex? There's brothels for that. Someone to split the bills? Get a roommate

Coming from a very logical point of view.

emerged01:

Marriage can never be a hindrance. It is a blessing when you have a good partner. Those who are breaking new grounds are married with kids and if they are divorced,they are on their way to another marriage. Elon musk is married with kids,Mark is married with kids,Dangote is married with kids,Otedola is married with kids e.tc . Marriage can never be a hindrance. With a good partner,you will achieve more.
A failed marriage shouldnt define marriage.

Those people that you mentioned did not make marriage their priority in life. They eventually got married after they have laid a solid foundation for their carrier .

Even Dangote is presently not married. According to him, he does not have the time to commit himself to a Marriage as his business comes first. It is that mentality that made Dangote to become the richest black man on Earth.

If a young man spend his youthful days thinking that he will become a fulfilled person when he gets married, that man has sign a contract with poverty.

Money is the horse that will pull the cart of marriage. Hence we should not have time for marriage until we have make enough money to sustain a marriage.

Not

Slmgirldippussy:




How old are u

He is 14 years old and has seamless access to mobile network data services.

Marriage is a big time achievement.

For the ladies.

emerged01:

Marriage can never be a hindrance. It is a blessing when you have a good partner. Those who are breaking new grounds are married with kids and if they are divorced,they are on their way to another marriage. Elon musk is married with kids,Mark is married with kids,Dangote is married with kids,Otedola is married with kids e.tc . Marriage can never be a hindrance. With a good partner,you will achieve more.
A failed marriage shouldnt define marriage.

Those people that you mentioned did not make marriage their priority in life. They eventually got married after they have laid a solid foundation for their carrier .

Even Dangote is presently not married. According to him, he does not have the time to commit himself to a Marriage as his business comes first. It is that mentality that made Dangote to become the richest black man on Earth.

If a young man spend his youthful days thinking that he will become a fulfilled person when he gets married, that man has sign a contract with poverty.

It is a blessing to have a good partner. However no good wife will allow her husband to take certain risks. Unfortunately, it is these risks that will make a man to break new grounds.

Money is the horse that will pull the cart of marriage. Hence we should not have time for marriage until we have make enough money to sustain a marriage.

Abi1985:

Some married people commit suicide and even more lonely than single people. Even the bible talk say in Proverbs 21:9 Better to live on a corner of the roof than to share a house with a quarrelsome wife. I am not against marriage, just don't marry Mr Wicked or Mrs Jezebel. If you are married, stay humble
Example https://www.nairaland.com/7435800/ibrahim-yunusa-bature-detains-starves

Today a friend was telling me that he will not advice anyone to marry our of pressure but because the person is right.. says he is going through hell in his marriage now..the most important thing is let God lead you

Kobojunkie:
now you rope his wife into it?

I though you knew him that well since you concluded, never jump into other peoples conclusions, that man never complained to you

Marriage is an achievement only to those who married the right person,if what u are feeling right now is like running from it,I know u wount call it an achievement

Marriage is a very big achievement bro author=Abi1985 post=118445082]Na marry you marry, don't come and be disturbing those who are not married. Just because you marry today does not mean you are better than those who are not married.

Please do not let your friend wedding oppress you, some married people are suffering and smiling. They will not tell you that the wife they marry na Jezebel associate or a runs girl or the husband they marry is a womanizer or an abusive man. They will do one big wedding today, then 9 months or 3 years later they divorce.

Personally I enjoy weddings because I can eat some correct food.

If your people are asking when are you getting married? Tell them when you do not want marry a Jezebel or a wicked or selfish man. Because after the wedding, you are on your own.

Na so they arrange one woman from village for me to marry, I just dey laugh and ignore. I enjoyed my bachelorhood, please let me enjoy my life. I do not want problem.

Marry when you want marry, do not let anyone pressure you to marry or who you will marry. [/quote]

Anything anyone decides to tag as an achievement for their self is an achievement. Whether it makes any iota of sense to others is another matter entirely.

MikeofAfrica:


Two friends , James and Paul, graduated from the University of Lagos same year. They did not get their dream jobs after school hence they both began teaching in a private school in Lagos.

James was still determine to get his dream job in an oil company. Hence he saved his salary for five years and proceed for a PG course related to Oil and Gas. He passed the course and later got his dream job.

Mainwhile, Paul who graduated with a better grade at UniLag got married while teaching at the Private School. He spent a lot of money in organizing a wedding party that meets his wife taste.

Paul also had to rent a better apartment .
After the marriage, his wife's two young siblings moved into his apartment. Even though his wife was paying her siblings school fees, Paul was responsible for their feedings and other needs. Nine months later, his wife gave birth giving him the main responsibility.

Hence by the time, James enrolled for the PG course, Paul was interested but had no money. He has to kill the dream to meet his family responsibility.

I hope you can see how marriage before fulfilling your purpose on Earth can prevent you from fulfilling your purpose on Earth.

sorry i dont "see how marriage before fulfilling your purpose on Earth can prevent you from fulfilling your purpose on Earth". you told just one story of two guys and you think it is a basis for condemning marriage across the whole earth made up of 7billion people. pls try again.

Which one is "carrier"?

pls tell me, are there no married men and women in Africa and across who are married and successful? are the successful people in the world today unmarried?