JoeRusson:


Why did you mention them to buttress your point? The ones marrying a poor man with plenty wives are those who were charmed or were already considered old in their community. Then there is the case of women in some communities not having a say over who they marry. This post is about women who have a say. Don't come and mix up trashiness here.

My friend nobody is charmed (I know you are the type to believe that!). Women are attracted to certain conditions. If you have them women will be attracted to you, money or no money!

PoliteActivist:


My friend nobody is charmed (I know you are the type to believe that!). Women are attracted to certain conditions. If you have them women will be attracted to you, money or no money!

I don't know where you want to take this conversation to and your plan for derailing this thread, but please stick to the topic which is avoid dating men. Only accept proposals not relationships. Whether he has money o, class o, six packs o, a reasonable woman who doesn't want to end up old and desperate should stop dating men. Keep yourself open for options. Don't be someone's property when he doesn't even know what your parents look like. Don't do this to your self because of unstable emotions. That boy you love today, you can hate with perfect hatred tomorrow. Don't sabotage your future because of unstable feelings. Don't wake up love before its time. It's for your own good.

JoeRusson:


I don't know where you want to take this conversation to and your plan for derailing this thread, but please stick to the topic which is avoid dating men. Only accept proposals not relationships. Whether he has money o, class o, six packs o, a reasonable woman who doesn't want to end up old and desperate should stop dating men. Keep yourself open for options. Don't be someone's property when he doesn't even know what your parents look like. Don't do this to your self because of unstable emotions. That boy you love today, you can hate with perfect hatred tomorrow. Don't sabotage your future because of unstable feelings. Don't wake up love before its time. It's for your own good.

You are the one derailing the thread. You were asked a simple question and requested to give a detailed answer: how do you advise girls to satisfy the natural almost irresistible hunger for intimacy and possibly love that is part of human nature and does not subside and wait for marriage??

PoliteActivist:


You are the one derailing the thread. You were asked a simple question and requested to give a detailed answer: how do you advise girls to satisfy the natural almost irresistible hunger for intimacy and possibly love that is part of human nature and does not subside and wait for marriage??

If everyone wanted to satisfy their hunger, there'll be probably more murderers, ritualists, prostitutes and more social vices. What has stopped majority is discipline and focus. That's what girls should have. Discipline to refuse time wasters and focus to get married to eligible bachelors.

The poster of this thread is obviously a woman who has matured in years and is looking at the topic from a narrow point of view, which is men chasing after girls. She failed to mention those instances when women go after guys, albeit in subtler ways. Not completing refuting what she has said, but only guys who aren’t focused enough go after girls to the extent that she mentioned. But asking girls not to date is a tall order which is completely unrealistic

JoeRusson:


If everyone wanted to satisfy their hunger, there'll be probably more murderers, ritualists, prostitutes and more social vices. What has stopped majority is discipline and focus. That's what girls should have. Discipline to refuse time wasters and focus to get married to eligible bachelors.

Ok. That's answer. Not a very good answer but an answer nonetheless. More like telling a hungry person to starve. Also begs a question: marriage does not guarantee anything - what if you find out they're not your type down there. What next?

PoliteActivist:


Ok. That's answer. Not a very good answer but an answer nonetheless. More like telling a hungry person to starve. Also begs a question: marriage does not guarantee anything - what if you find out they're not your type down there. What next?

It can't be a good answer for someone like you with sinister motives towards young girls. Marriage guarantees you a lot. You're under a protection, an umbrella. Your question, what if you find out they're not your type down there? Is that the basis of having plenty sexual partners to continue testing until you find your type? Do older women still think of type down there when they're now desperate for a man?

tivhador:
The poster of this thread is obviously a woman who has matured in years and is looking at the topic from a narrow point of view, which is men chasing after girls. She failed to mention those instances when women go after guys, albeit in subtler ways. Not completing refuting what she has said, but only guys who aren’t focused enough go after girls to the extent that she mentioned. But asking girls not to date is a tall order which is completely unrealistic

The topic is stop dating men, whether its the man doing the chasing or girl is doing it.

JoeRusson:
I don't know the young lady that needs to hear this, but really stop. The 30+ single women ended up that way because they kept dating and dating and now they're begging their boyfriends to marry them. This won't have happened if they kept themselves open to options. Don't date. When you're ready to marry, you can do a courtship of six months or less

A man sees a young single girl of about 18 years and above. The selfish being knows he is not ready to marry. Instead of focusing on his life and making money and becoming successful, he will decide to string the naïve girl with promises of marriage. That's how the girl will start hoping year after year, waiting for the man to bend a knee and ask the question. Year after year she gets older, time is passing her by. It's worse for the loyal ones, those who don't cheat because they're ultimately stuck with the time waster. Very soon, with persistent cries from her parents, mothers especially, she begins to pester the man, asking him when he is coming to see her parents. The man starts to see her as desperate, someone he promised marriage. She becomes the topic of discussion with his friends. "Girls no dey reason o, how she expect say we go marry, me wey still dey struggle." They didn't remember they're struggling when they were pestering your life to accept the miserable relationship where they were widening your down below for nothing.

Stop dating! If a man asks for a relationship, refuse. If he promises you marriage, ask when and ensure no sexual relationship exists within that time so no one gets hurt. Be assertive. Let him know nothing is happening until after the wedding. Men will want to cajole you, force you to shift your stance. When you think of compromising, also think of how you'll be 30+ begging for a marriage that may never happen. Don't let this men take you for a fool. Use your youth wisely.

The bolder can only work if it is proven that the woman is still a virgin. That's the only the man can confirm that no foul play happened while at the no-sex-till-marriage relationship.

JoeRusson:


It can't be a good answer for someone like you with sinister motives towards young girls. Marriage guarantees you a lot. You're under a protection, an umbrella. Your question, what if you find out they're not your type down there? Is that the basis of having plenty sexual partners to continue testing until you find your type? Do older women still think of type down there when they're now desperate for a man?

Has nothing to do with motives but with being realistic as to human nature. You are telling a person to be disciplined and starve to death amidst food she loves. And you don't guarantee her happiness down the road but marriage slavery.
No, marriage does not guarantee happiness at all nor does it guarantee lasting union. Only thing it guarantees is society and parents will leave you alone for the time being.
You were asked a simple question: what do you do if you find the person is a total disappointment to you down there?

Amumaigwe:


The bolder can only work if it is proven that the woman is still a virgin. That's the only the man can confirm that no foul play happened while at the no-sex-till-marriage relationship.

Girls, don't let this comment fool you. Yes there are men that thinks like this, but there are also men that don't care of your virginity status and will still respect your stance. Wait for them, keep your options open.

PoliteActivist:


Has nothing to do with motives but with being realistic as to human nature. You are telling a person to be disciplined and starve to death amidst food she loves. And you don't guarantee her happiness down the road but marriage slavery.
No, marriage does not guarantee happiness at all nor does it guarantee lasting union. Only thing it guarantees is society will leave you alone for the time being.
You were asked a simple question: what do you do if you find the person is a total disappointment to you down there?

It's funny how you put this subtly like you don't know the peace of mind it brings. I have answered your question with another question because no matter the response I give, it won't be enough. Another question, what do married men do when they find out their wives hole doesn't fit?

JoeRusson:


It's funny how you put this subtly like you don't know the peace of mind it brings. I have answered your question with another question because no matter the response I give, it won't be enough. Another question, what do married men do when they find out their wives hole doesn't fit?

@bolded, so you know your problem is peace of mind, which can only come from inside. So work on your mind instead of making marriage your sole life purpose! Heck, you've always been advised not to live your life for society or parents.
You don't answer sincere questions with questions, you offer suggestions.
As to married men, that's why most wish to test it a little bit in advance

PoliteActivist:


@bolded, so you know your problem is peace of mind, which can only come from inside. So work on your mind instead of making marriage your sole life purpose! Heck, you've always been advised not to live your life for society or parents.
You don't answer sincere questions with questions, you offer suggestions.
As to married men, that's why most wish to test it a little bit in advance

Hmmm, it how men says women are manipulators, when they're the greatest manipulators of all time. You alone mentioned society, because you know the role it plays in everyone lives. Secondly, sincere questions? What happened to the answers I've given before, what did you make out of them? So the married men in question that test a bit, its good you wrote most, not all. What do the rest do? What do the married men who wives widened after childbirth do? Let's all ask questions.

JoeRusson:


Hmmm, it how men says women are manipulators, when they're the greatest manipulators of all time. You alone mentioned society, because you know the role it plays in everyone lives. Secondly, sincere questions? What happened to the answers I've given before, what did you make out of them? So the married men in question that test a bit, its good you wrote most, not all. What do the rest do? What do the married men who wives widened after childbirth do? Let's all ask questions.

Society gets inside you only if you let it. You can train your mind such that your peace of mind is not dependent on society. Such that if you get married, fine; but if you never get married you'd fine too.
The rest of the men DIVORCE or compensate in other ways; so also childbirth. Different from getting into something that could have easily been avoided!

PoliteActivist:


Society gets inside you only if you let it. You can train your mind such that your peace of mind is not dependent on society. Such that if you get married, fine; but if you never get married you'd fine too.
The rest of the men DIVORCE or compensate in other ways; so also childbirth. Different from getting into something that could have easily been avoided!

See you have answered your question yourself. Also, there's nothing about easily avoided. When you're young, you're not desperate. Your parents or guidance can do due diligence and ask questions to the best of their abilities. If there's any difformity the man has, they will discover. This is different from an older woman they just want to leave the house even if she's going to marry a beast.

More over, in the past, there's the tradition of the woman going to the man's family house to stay for a week or more to get to know the man and his family. If after what she experiences there she decided to call off the marriage, no problem.

And you can continue to deceive yourself with your philosophical quotes about society, won't even bother myself with that.

So I don't keep replying unnecessary comment, I'll drop one last marriage, young ladies, stop dating men. Focus on yourself, develop your self, make and spend money. When a true man comes, he won't need to take you through a gruesome process of dating, its courtship and marriage straightup. Just ensure you're presentable and cheerly.

JoeRusson:


See you have answered your question yourself. Also, there's nothing about easily avoided. When you're young, you're not desperate. Your parents or guidance can do due diligence and ask questions to the best of their abilities. If there's any difformity the man has, they will discover. This is different from an older woman they just want to leave the house even if she's going to marry a beast.

More over, in the past, there's the tradition of the woman going to the man's family house to stay for a week or more to get to know the man and his family. If after what she experiences there she decided to call off the marriage, no problem.

And you can continue to deceive yourself with your philosophical quotes about society, won't even bother myself with that.

I haven't answered my question. Let me put it to you a bit differently: what's another way for a girl to know a guy is ok down there without dating or some intimacy??
Has nothing to do with "due diligence"
There is nothing philosophical about what I said. It is pure common sense. You can never satisfy society
- "they". So if you let your peace be dependent on "they", you are in for one boring, unhappy ride!