Naira20:
If it's up to you alone, Avoid it.
Except there's a clear Divine instruction or she hates living that life.

Most times, it affects them negatively and they'd take it out on you.

Be wise

Is this a statement of grace?

They can still have a good behavior. So i don't think this is actually a big problem

Naira20:
If it's up to you alone, Avoid it.
Except there's a clear Divine instruction or she hates living that life.

Most times, it affects them negatively and they'd take it out on you.

Be wise

you are so dman on point brother man!

pleasureosondu:
With the increase in the number of divorce in Nigeria, it's clear that kids from separated homes will increase. For those born in the early 1990's, many witnessed their parents live together even when they were clearly incompatible. You learn by observing how they "managed" themselves but today, people divorce with flimsy excuses rather than to look for practical solutions to the problem.

If parents continue with this divorce trend, they are indirectly setting a new standard- that divorce is the easy way out of a marriage. So, how will their kids (when they become adults) know how to manage their families since they didn't learn the qualities that holds marriage due to the fact that their parents were separated? As a guy, will you be comfortable marrying a girl with such family background?

When the Lady is raised by her mom, then there is a big problem, because she continues to see her dad as the problem of the marriage even when she knows nothing about what lead to the separation, she sees her mom as the Saint and the mom will never admit what the real problem of her marriage is, she keeps blaming the lady's daddy, then the lady's mind has been pre-poisioned against men even long before she gets married and she starts taking it out on an innocent husband. Most of the times Ladies like that end up like their mothers, then it starts looking like a generational curse. And these types of ladies and their mothers pray alot, but really it is like a Doctor leaving Leprosy to treat Ringworm.
My advise to guys is be very cautious, pay attention to the lady's attitude and words about her parents, her mannerism, don't be swept away by spiritual gingoism.

Romanoff:
Better to marry someone who was raised in a healthy environment by a single parent than to marry someone who was raised in a toxic and abusive two parent household.

Ugo. C. Shege.

Just do your research well on the parent that raised her and the circumstances behind her parents separation.

there is no 'healthy environment" in single parenting

The kids are psychologically affected,directly or indirectly. And they usually exhibit such psychological imbalance in their behaviors.

Oga short up, you are sounding toxic already.. bunch of hypocrites

Naira20:
Those who have ear have heard.

You are free to go and marry them.

Immatex:


Happily married for 6 years now and counting. Superstition is not an ingredient to a healthy marriage!

Same here. We started dating since 2002 and got married 2016.. We are the best in the world I can beat my chest

Fiscus105:




If a man marries a lady from single mum, I will advise him to have big endurance, because, ladies that usually brought up from single mum, normally lack experience of how wife do take care of husband and submissive in marriage.

....... she might not know, how "not" to welcome different visitors at home, male inclusive (cos her single mum she knew, normally do it)

She might not know, how to buy good/replace husband dishes that they used to serve food (cos she never experienced that her mother served her dad food before)

She might go out and come back home whenever she wants (her experience from her mother,who is not under any man)etc

Dated a single mother once and anything we eat together she dey alway grab d best meat in plate first

Kobojunkie:
1. You no serious. Divorce in the form of Marriage abandonment has been a norm in the South since the time of your ancestors, even though those in the North have openly embraced divorce for almost as long.

2. Do you also conclude that a deadbeat father sets a standard for all of his children to turn out like him? Or do you suppose that children who have parents who are high achievers will all end up high achievers as well?

3. Children aren't as daft as you think. Many in fact grow up to become much better humans than those before them. Of course some don't but to conclude that because the parents were bad parents the child much also be a bad parent means you lack understanding of what makes us human beings -- that ability to decide for our own selves the life we want.

4. If a girl can marry a guy from such a background why can't a guy marry a girl from similar background?

what the OP as fail to know is that everyone as an individual life to live with..
Modified: Because who you marry,how you marry,which way it was arranged,by whom it was arranged is not important...but how responsible you exist...that’s all it is.

Don’t mind that hypocrite.

Romanoff:


So people should stay with abusive partners cause it's "healthier" to you.

Una go just dey ask nonsense questions...

Fancy4e:
you lie my friend…..I was raised by my mother all by herself, after she lost her husband when I was 3yrs, she is so Godly nd taught everyone on how to live nd respect their spouse…….my dear, when someone is bad, that person is bad, irrespective of the family’s background……you all know the main cause of breakup in our society, so stop making look like they weren’t raised properly……

Dear friend, go back to basic English class and tell your teacher to teach you the exact meaning of word the 'MIGHT '

After that, give my post to your teacher for detail explaination without being prejudiced,tell him or her to take cognizance of the word "MIGHT " that I used heavily in my post.

tiswell:
there is no 'healthy environment" in single parenting

The kids are psychologically affected,directly or indirectly. And they usually exhibit such psychological imbalance in their behaviors.

Dey play o

So if you find out your wife is an adulterer, you'll stay in the marriage so that your kids are not "psychologically affected". Abi?

Just dey play.

obinna58:
If she grew with a single father - considerable, infact it’s ok
If she grew with a single mother - run for your life

You are wise!

Facts

Immatex:


Happily married for 6 years now and counting. Superstition is not an ingredient to a healthy marriage!

Romanoff:


I am also married.

Now let me shock you, I dated a senator's son once. Why did I break up with the clown? Dude could never apologize to save his life. Rather than apologize, he'd ask "where do you want to go to, let me spoil you".

I saw right through it and ran away for my life.

Another one, rich but would insult my life and family during any disagreement, that was the point I decided it was better to marry an average guy than a rich dude.

Only hungry and lazy women are impressed by money.

If money was always the case, what happened to the rich women who are also being abused?

Or the abuse that goes on in the ghettos?

You are a sick liar!

neonly:




Dated a single mother once and anything we eat together she dey alway grab d best meat in plate first

That's one of the reasons husband dumbed her, (not submissive and competing with husband) if you go back to her root and study her parents, it might be single mother that raised her.

Do not marry a woman whose father died young you will die young
Do not marry any woman whose family have been attacked by armed robbers you will be robbed
Do not marry any woman whose father was ever sacked they will sack you
Do not marry a woman from a family that has a member with HIV
Don't marry from a family that COVID affectet
If a woman tells you that a snake bit her father before just run because snake will definitely bite you

Romanoff:


No. You're trying to get me to tell you that women are generally materialistic in their choices of spouses but I can't relate cause i might not have a lot of friends but the ones I have are sensible.

So if you attract lazy and vain females or if that's what you see around, that's all on you and not for me to validate.

Bye sir.

You too get sense. Respect.

pleasureosondu:
I'm not a victim?? You really don't have an idea of what kids(adults) from separated homes go through. Parents don't understand the mental effects of their separation on their kids. With my experience, it's a huge risk marrying a lady from a Separated Home

very huge risk and it comes with a lot of emotional baggage, just like marrying a single mother.



Run,bro,run!

So primitive, i must admit . You are no different from people who once killed twins with very faulty beliefs.

omonnakoda:
Do not marry a woman whose father died young you will die young
Do not marry any woman whose family have been attacked by armed robbers you will be robbed
Do not marry any woman whose father was ever sacked they will sack you
Do not marry a woman from a family that has a member with HIV
Don't marry from a family that COVID affectet
If a woman tells you that a snake but her father before just run because snake will definitely bite you

Otunbakayce:
You are a sick liar!

With an outburst like this, you're obviously the sick one.

Over someone you know nothing about.

Get well soon o.

Not just children of separated parents, even children who grew under a very toxic environment are a potential threat in marriage.

A lady whose mum controls her father is dangerous to marry because she will try to control her own husband as she learnt by observing the mother.

Similarly, a man whose father who grew witnessing his father abuse and suppress the wife is also a potential abuser in marriage.

So, before you marry, study the family diligently.

Don’t mind those toxic hypocrites, instead of them to work on their toxicity self and be a better person to their partners, they are here trying to shift blame to parental marriages.

Immatex:


Let me say this: Marry only if you truly love a person, not their parents. Isaac set a good example because Genesis 10 informs us he married Rebekah because he 'fell in love'.

If you show your spouse love as defined at 1 Cor. 13:4-8, they will love you in return and won't divorce even if their parents were divorced.

But if you treat your partner with contempt, He or She will leave.

Honour and love your wives, love and respect your husbands and have no fear, your marriage will make a success!

deathmen12:
Don’t mind those toxic hypocrites, instead of them to work on their toxicity self and be a better person to their partners, they are here trying to shift blame to parental marriages.

Romanoff:
Better to marry someone who was raised in a healthy environment by a single parent than to marry someone who was raised in a toxic and abusive two parent household.

Ugo. C. Shege.

Just do your research well on the parent that raised her and the circumstances behind her parents separation.

Marrying a daughter from a single mom is the worst thing I can give you examples because they won't value marriage

ogene144:

Marrying a daughter from a single mom is the worst thing I can give you examples because they won't value marriage

This is a big fat lie.

You people say this so much yet, even couples from two parents household divorce steadily without even looking back.

Fancy4e:
you lie my friend…..I was raised by my mother all by herself, after she lost her husband when I was 3yrs, she is so Godly nd taught everyone on how to live nd respect their spouse…….my dear, when someone is bad, that person is bad, irrespective of the family’s background……you all know the main cause of breakup in our society, so stop making look like they weren’t raised properly……

Facts

😝

Why not? Na disease? If her parents union didn't work why won't her's work?

CHoccolaTE:


You put up very intelligent points in this debate but the thing with arguing with males is that they hate losing to females so they keep taking you round in circles until they wear you out or they change the topic to another one they can defend properly or they start using ad hominens and telling you how you are irrational or untruthful or emotional and so on.
Very difficult and irritating gender.

Where is intelligent point? I deliberately stopped convo with her because her submissions full of gender sentiments,......if u follow our argument, when she asked,what of guy from single woman? I quickly agreed that the same thing will play out, but for her, she kept denying obvious, she was saying opposite of what is going on in reality.

......It's an open secret that women will not think twice before they move up to a guy they persive is better than the current boyfriend, it has nothing to do whether the girl is dependent or independent.

U ask urself, why Linda ikeji went for a man who only interested in sex and not Marriage?

Why Dj cuppy not married any unknown guy that full naija?

Did u think these ladies not seeing several unknown guys asking them out? They are doing that because of hypergamy.

pleasureosondu:
Agree it wasn't the kid's fault but do we should now continue to trend and accept divorce? If parents divorce with flimsy excuses, what guarantee do you have that their innocent ( now adults) won't do same to their partner? And it's always the ladies that are quick to file for divorce. Just check Nairaland's front-page

It's easier to say till one experience it. My parents divorced but my sisters are married, raising better homes and learnt lessons. Personally I even prefer to be with someone that understands the hurt divorce brings long term and the importance of listening to yourselves and working things out than someone who sees divorce as a way out from even the smallest problem. Is divorce mentally damaging? Yes! Do I wish it never happened in my home? Yes! But judging someone for that is plain stupid. The ones when dey divorce up and down now their mama and papa divorce abi?