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What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man - Family (5) - Nairaland

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Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Fearyourcreator: 2:39pm On Nov 30, 2023
frozen70:


Being single parent and being a divorced man is not a curse

Whom soever the children are staying with, the man knows that he has children some where and must divide his attentions with them, including your sister

The only disadvantage there is that, in the near future, those children the other wife had for him, if any, will bring their mother back home and by that time, their father won't have an option because they may be so comfortable to build a house their mum will be staying

So they will now have a voice of their own and speak for their mum

Once they succeed of which they will succeed

Your sister will be the second wife by default

I think i will prefer your sister to get a widower if she can't get a bachelor for peace of mind
Imagine ... Make a bachelor marry single mother ... Lolzzzz ...
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Fiscus105(m): 2:41pm On Nov 30, 2023
Honeydenz:


There are different reasons guys are reluctant to marry whom they impregnate, it doesn't boil down to the girl's character alone, most times it's as a result of the guy's financial inability to provide for a family that has turned our girls into baby mamas, you don't have money, yet they are hunting for pussy to bang, then turn around to blamed d girl for not being In her husband's house. Nor be who chop belleful dey marry? Shameless men!!



Are u now blaming the frustrated he-goats that hunting for pusssies to bang or foolish hoes, that open pusssies for complete jobless guys.

Tall guys, handsome guy ,six pack. Without money and good behaviour to make ur marriage enjoyable, you would taste hell on earth.


Not tangible job, yet open legs for him, anyway I hardly pity woman sha.

2 Likes

Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by IamHonourable1: 3:12pm On Nov 30, 2023
Your sister is the one the man should be worried about here and not vice versa
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by ThatCEO: 3:13pm On Nov 30, 2023
Persephone1:
The fact that your sister is a single mother doesn't make her invalid, she deserves all the love, loyalty and most importantly PEACE like every other person.
The fact that your mother has a daughter who is a single mother doesn't make her half a being she deserves the right to protect and look out for her daughter's well being.
Your mum is very right to oppose a union she presume dangerous or unfruitful albeit with valid evidence of course. Once bitten, twice shy ! I respect your mother for being objective and not desperate, some mothers would have been the ones pushing their daughters into marriage irrespective of who the man is.

There are lots of Pros and Cons in marrying or dating a single father or divorcee. Most times the cons tend to be more visible because pros has to do with personality of the person involved and how couples have been able to manage their cons.

My question: Does your sister know this man? The true reason he is divorced? Is she ready face whatever may come with him? Is she ready to accept that in some situations she may not be his priority? Is she marrying for love and commitment and not for wedding ring and title? Is the man really committed to her and not what she has to offer as a woman? Is she ready to be a single mother of more kids if anything goes wrong? Can she love another person's kids.
Let her answer these questions genuinely If she is positive then she can go on to convince your Mom.

Good luck.

Spoken like a true feminist cheesy

Here is another angle. The man was responsible enough to at least marry someone the right way. The girl's sister gave it away for free, which makes her pretty irresponsible.

She won't let her daughter marry a man with a child, but she wants someone else's son who has never had a child to marry her own after one daughter.

Women overinflate their true worth. She is an adult, n she can do whatever she wants but the person currently pricing the goods looks like the best she can get. But if she feel she can do better, who am I to stop her?

4 Likes

Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by IamHonourable1: 3:23pm On Nov 30, 2023
This may sound out of point, but where was your sister staying before she broke up with her man?
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by enemyofprogress: 3:46pm On Nov 30, 2023
Run oooooooooooo



With the way things are going in this country now, dating a food seller is better than dating a graduate fa 🤷🤷😜😋🤣🤣🏃🏃🏃🏃
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Myer(m): 3:51pm On Nov 30, 2023
Lamanii22:
So guys, my sister met a man like a year ago that is divorced, right now he wants them to take it to another level, like wedding level…. My sister is a single mother though, educated, working class, successful…. But my mom doesn’t agree to it, she’s only seeing the bad side…


So I would like to know if there’s anyone who has gotten married to a divorced man before.. I would also like to know the pros and cons…

This said man has been truthful so far though…

Waiting for comments! Thank you…
Every thing has it's Pros and Cons.

They're both single/divorced for a reason.
They both have to allow themselves to heal first other wise.. fry pan to fire.

But if they've learnt the necessary lessons from previous relationship and healed, they're going to be able to understand and support each other better.
Most importantly, they should please put God first.

1 Like

Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by BreconHills(m): 4:20pm On Nov 30, 2023
slimjohn2k5:
A lot of cons
because u only heard her side of the story on y she got divorced.

Also, a second marriage is mostly more turbulent than the first

3rd u deal with step children and their father's visit

You cannot complain because many people warned you before u went in, so u die in silence.

Better chose your battle wisely

Bolded is rarely true. Both parties are heavily motivated to succeed. It can work. It depends on the same thing as for two single people. Depth of relationship and common vision.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Tunagee(m): 4:37pm On Nov 30, 2023
ScamHunter:
Never, I repeat, never marry a divorced man or woman unless you're not a Christian. Marrying a divorced person whose former spouse still lives is adultery before God. Also, never discountenance the opinion of family who oppose a marriage. God may be speaking through them. Your sister is priming herself for future regret if she ignores your mother.

I agree totally about not marrying a divorced whose spouse is still alive, but person go wait till the ex spouse die? If the ex spouse no die or has remarried nko
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by haslaw(m): 4:37pm On Nov 30, 2023
HumbleTrader:
Are you that old you can't get a young man to marry.


Be realistic...

How many young men will marry a single mother in her thirties.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by haslaw(m): 4:42pm On Nov 30, 2023
Saintmary:



Isn't there any other man proposing to your sis?


Divorced men are a minefield in my opinion.


Marriage is a big deal o, every problem in the relationship will be amplified in marriage.


If it were my sister, I would ask her to wait a bit.


Remember the sister is also a single mother in her thirties and her options are slim. She should consider herself lucky a man is even asking her out sef.


cc : Lamanii22

1 Like

Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by worksmart(m): 4:56pm On Nov 30, 2023
How old is your sister and how old is the divorced man she wants to marry?
What is the reason he divorced?
How long did his marriage last?
Does he have children? How many?
How financially buoyant is he?
How financially buoyant is your sister?
How long have they been dating?

Answer these question then I may be able to form an opinion and possibly advise you.
@ Lamanii22
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by baralatie(m): 5:18pm On Nov 30, 2023
Lamanii22:
So guys, my sister met a man like a year ago that is divorced, right now he wants them to take it to another level, like wedding level…. My sister is a single mother though, educated, working class, successful…. But my mom doesn’t agree to it, she’s only seeing the bad side…


So I would like to know if there’s anyone who has gotten married to a divorced man before.. I would also like to know the pros and cons…

This said man has been truthful so far though…

Waiting for comments! Thank you…
Once bitten twice shy
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by litaninja(m): 5:28pm On Nov 30, 2023
lol
The mother is being choosy over her single-mchooseyother offspring. lmao.


Lamanii22:
So guys, my sister met a man like a year ago that is divorced, right now he wants them to take it to another level, like wedding level…. My sister is a single mother though, educated, working class, successful…. But my mom doesn’t agree to it, she’s only seeing the bad side…


So I would like to know if there’s anyone who has gotten married to a divorced man before.. I would also like to know the pros and cons…

This said man has been truthful so far though…

Waiting for comments! Thank you…
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Exceed15: 5:52pm On Nov 30, 2023
The man is divorced and well established but simply said your sister is a single mother "though ".. na almost same boat dem dey o. Infact I fear single mothers more . They carry bitterness, baggage, anger and regret around.

1 Like

Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by frozen70(f): 6:06pm On Nov 30, 2023
Fearyourcreator:

Imagine ... Make a bachelor marry single mother ... Lolzzzz ...

One man's meat is another man's poison
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Fearyourcreator: 6:10pm On Nov 30, 2023
frozen70:


One man's meat is another man's poison
Which yeye poison
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by theamazonguru(m): 6:35pm On Nov 30, 2023
HumbleTrader:
Are you that old you can't get a young man to marry.

Remember she is also a single mother.

Which young guy in his right senses should want to get married for the first time in his life and will settle for a single mother. Even if he likes her the family will oppose it.
Just the same way her own mother is opposing her from getting married to a divorcee.

Make them wait till she grow old now.

Why didn't her baby daddy get married to her if she was that good.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by pharmaking: 6:37pm On Nov 30, 2023
Single mothers and divorced women are both cobras under the blanket.

Their bite is deadly.

They never forgive not forget.

Filled with venom of vengeance.The divorced man is the one I pity here.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by tonymyke4life(m): 7:27pm On Nov 30, 2023
I think the man should look for another girl to marry. If the only reason ur mum is against ur sister who's a single mum marrying Him. Let the man breathe.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Peterprecious1(m): 7:35pm On Nov 30, 2023
https://www.facebook.com/share/r/NyXT12pqbKhcfA3o/?mibextid=WC7FNe
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by benzion72(m): 7:58pm On Nov 30, 2023
Perfect combo Divorce and single mom them be 5 and 6
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by naijapikin2(m): 9:41pm On Nov 30, 2023
All these advice you are getting on nairaland will your sister agree to abide by them
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Consciousmind01(m): 10:24pm On Nov 30, 2023
Lamanii22:
So guys, my sister met a man like a year ago that is divorced, right now he wants them to take it to another level, like wedding level…. My sister is a single mother though, educated, working class, successful…. But my mom doesn’t agree to it, she’s only seeing the bad side…


So I would like to know if there’s anyone who has gotten married to a divorced man before.. I would also like to know the pros and cons…

This said man has been truthful so far though…

Waiting for comments! Thank you…

Divorce does not end a marriage, only death ends a marriage. As long as the divorced man first wife is still living your sister should not bother herself marrying such man. Since your sister is a singer mother and she has never been married before she has to look for a man that has never been married before which is acceptable in the sight of God. If she go ahead and marry the divorced man, in the sight of God she’s not married but only committing fornication while the man is committing adultery (since the man is already married before).
Luke 16:18, Roman 7:1-3, 1Corinthians 7:10-11.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by davidadenrele: 4:56am On Dec 01, 2023
Hello,

The fact that a man is divorced does not make him an evil man, as humans situation and circumstances can make us victims of life challenges am sure the said man would have informed your sister what transpired, and am also sure your sister would have done her thorough investigation If the man he's about to get married to he's speaking the truth and he's anything to believe however your mum has every right to her own opinion as a mother I will advised your sister to humbly go to your mum and inquire more what are your mum fears and reasons sometimes what an Elder sees while sitting a young child can never see it, even if he climbs an iroko tree let your sister tread carefully the words of an Elder are words of wisdom your mum could have seen or notice something your sister didn't see or notice because she's in love, it can be spiritual and it can be something that would save and help your sister before she regret getting married to the man in question above all pray for your sister and commit her into God's hand its well.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by franco3075q(m): 6:54am On Dec 01, 2023
HumbleTrader:
Are you that old you can't get a young man to marry.
Are the young men ready 2 settle down or even ready 2 marry a single mother?
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by franco3075q(m): 7:01am On Dec 01, 2023
HumbleTrader:
Are you that old you can't get a young man to marry.
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by asakeaina: 10:57am On Dec 01, 2023
Lamanii22:



No, it’s not that… she just doesn’t want a situation like polygamy where the ex-wife would now be disturbing them… that kind of a thing….

Story their equation is balanced 🙄! Your sister too has baggage and should never be selected! Your mother is just being selfish!

If the man is good there is no problem. They both have kids. On the notion that he is a second wife by default, there is nothing wrong with being a second wife if there is peace of mind. My 2cents
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by asakeaina: 10:59am On Dec 01, 2023
asakeaina:


Story! Their equation is balanced 🙄! Your sister too has baggage and should never be selective Your mother is just being selfish! She want her daughter to look for bachelor who probably has never marry before despite being after 1?

If the man is good there is no problem. They both have kids. On the notion that she is a second wife by default, there is nothing wrong with being a second wife if there is peace of mind. My 2cents
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by Steveagro: 12:12pm On Dec 01, 2023
Is it confirmed that the man is divorced? If yes then they are almost in the same category and should be doing similar researches about each other.
Pros if both of them hove healed from their past they are likely going to make it work
Cons: Either or both of them will end enforcing Okafors law when their marriage faces a turbulent season
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by femi4: 8:41am On Dec 02, 2023
Lamanii22:
So guys, my sister met a man like a year ago that is divorced, right now he wants them to take it to another level, like wedding level…. My sister is a single mother though, educated, working class, successful…. But my mom doesn’t agree to it, she’s only seeing the bad side…


So I would like to know if there’s anyone who has gotten married to a divorced man before.. I would also like to know the pros and cons…

This said man has been truthful so far though…

Waiting for comments! Thank you…
No one size fits all. People are wired differently. Some still hold their ex close to their heart while others move on quickly
Re: What Are The Pros And Cons Of Marrying A Divorced Man by ScamHunter: 9:01am On Dec 02, 2023
Tunagee:


I agree totally about not marrying a divorced whose spouse is still alive, but person go wait till the ex spouse die? If the ex spouse no die or has remarried nko

Marriage is far deeper that many of us realized. That's why many of us approached it carelessly. Divorces stem from marrying carelessly and without spiritual guidance (especially for a Christian). If you marry wrongly, your marital destiny has been destroyed unless the wrong spouse dies and you're free from them to now find the right spouse. If you plan to have a partner all the days of your life, you must marry only who God directs you to. Now to your question, the high standard of the word of God for the Chrstian dictates that they NEVER marry again if a former spose is alive. Even if that spose has remarried, they're not guided by the same law of Christ as the Christian is. The vision of the Chrsitan is to please God always and finally make it to that heavenly home. The unbeliver doesn't have that vision hence they can live in second and third marriages oblivious of the fact that they're committing adultery and on the broad road to hell. For the Christian whose partner divorced, they MUST remain unmarried as long as that partner is alive, even if they had remarried. That is God's word.

1 Like

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