Pathetic: Sleep with her and risk sticking inside her for the next 3 days!

She is suffering depression. She needs help. She is from Cross River State. Her husband has left and abandoned her with one child for over 4 years and she can't remarry not because she doesn't want to but a traditional rite was done on her with the consent of the husband that any man that sleeps with her will be stuck in her for 3 days until the husband himself comes to release them....a "husband that is nowhere to be seen!"

This is a true life story and I have met with the lady involved face to face! For the purposes of this write-up, I will use her name as Gold, that of her little 4 year old son as Junior. Then her estranged husband as Dave. Every other setting remains as original.

It was a sunny Sunday afternoon at Asaba. I had just returned from the church and since I had an interview session with Gold, I didn't go home but headed straight to the Chicken Republic along Nnebisi Road where we agreed to meet. She had called me earlier that she was on her way from the Ọkpanam axis of the city while I was coming from the Koka axis and reckoned I would arrive 1st before her based on my calculations.

So when I reached the premises of Chicken Republic, I didn't bother calling her. I went straight in to wait at a corner after acknowledging the welcome greetings of the security guard that opened the door for me with that their perennial anything-for-the-boys? hopeful smile they usually give when you are entering or going.

I sat down and looked around. The usual hustle and bustle of a typical busy day inside Chicken Republic.
"Nice! Nice"! one of the waitresses shouted in a loud voice at her colleagues at the other side behind her. I have been wondering what that "nice nice" thing they normally shout means. I am yet to find out. On the selling counter, impatient customers lined up while their orders were being taken. One man got impatient and the abandoned part of the orders he had already made and stormed out after shouting himself hoarse to get the attention of the overwhelmed waitress serving him. A boy with their now usual trending but ugly-looking short dreadlocks was taking endless orders with his excited girlfriend giggling and tugging at his arm. Don't ask me if he is a "yahoo boy". Your guess is as good as mine. It was indeed a beehive of activities inside.

I turned to my side and noticed a young lady with a small kid seated by her side. The small kid was licking a cup of ice cream excitedly while the lady with him had her face partly buried in the face cap she was wearing. She was pressing and flipping through her phone. I looked away from them, but wait a minute, I looked back more closely, Gold!

I had gone through her pictures on Facebook before our appointment. I had seen her wedding pictures both white wedding and traditional, several pictures of her and her kid. Yes it was her!

"Gold"! I said, "Aaaah you've been here. I thought you were still on your way".

Gold smiled and looked up. She had a diastema that was lovely to see as she smiled. I moved over to she and her kid and sat opposite them. The kid was still busy with his cup of ice cream and splattered some of it on his dress. I tickled his cheeks. He looked up and smiled at me. He was just a male version of his mum.

"Good afternoon sir. Happy Sunday", Gold said.
"Good afternoon sir", Junior repeated after her mum with his ice cream-stained mouth and winced.
"Good afternoon," I responded and to Junior I patted his head and said, "how are you boy"?

"Fine",Junior replied and I noticed he winced again. His mum noticed this time and asked, "What is it"?
Junior dropped the ice cream scoop and clenched his teeth tightly.
"Mummy the aisshh cream is shhooo cold",Junior said.
I couldn't help laughing. Kids!
"Be taking it small small," Gold told him and cleaned off some ice cream on Junior's shirt with her handkerchief.

So after exchanging of pleasantries were over, and Junior once again distracted by his ice ream which he was now nibbling at, in obedience to his mum's instruction, I and Gold settled down to business.

Gold got married in 2017 shortly after her mum died. Her dad had died many years earlier when she was a kid. Gold is the last in family of 4 girls. They are from Calabar in Cross River State.

Gold's husband, Dave was in the same church choir as Gold in Port Harcourt but they were not even close at all just a case of someone's normal colleague in the choir. So Gold was a little surprised when Dave suddenly asked for her hand in marriage. This was a few months after Dave got a job as a chef with one of the politicians in Abuja and relocated with the politician to Abuja but occasionally came to Port Harcourt to see Gold.

Gold hesitated but accepted the marriage proposal because, according to her, she was at the lowest ebb of her life. She had just lost her mum who was the one taking care of her financially and her 3 older sisters were all married out and not so financially stable. She was just the one left at home.

So she got married to Dave traditionally in her hometown closely followed by a white wedding in Uyo, Dave's hometown. Gold pointed out that Dave's mum, her mother-in-law never hid her hatred for her which she did not bother much about as she felt things would ease out later. I asked why Dave's mum did not like her and she said probably she wanted Dave to marry someone higher in the social ladder and not just an ordinary school of nursing student from a poor and unknown family such as hers.

After their marriage, Dave went back to his work in Abuja while Gold continued with her schooling in Port Harcourt. Whenever possible, she went on weekends to be with Dave and also spends her holidays with him.

Dave's employer was appointed to a very high position by the Delta State Government in 2018 and moved over to Asaba same year with Dave. Gold now heavily pregnant, moved in with Dave to a 2 bedroom apartment at Asaba with the hope that she would now enjoy her marriage more as she and Dave were now living together but to her utter amazement, Dave changed.

"His job was demanding as a chef but even the little off duties his boss always gives, I will not see him. If I call him, he will not answer. I no longer knew when he is at duty or not", Gold said.

Things got worse when Gold's pregnancy became due.She was admitted at St.Joseph Hospital Asaba and even when her husband's presence was required for him to sign some documents for some medical procedures to be carried out on Gold, he was nowhere to be seen and his phones were switched off. It was some of Gold's chorister colleagues at her church in Asaba that later signed.

When Gold delivered her baby, and was due to leave and still Dave no where to be seen, the hospital authorities refused to allow her leave since her hospital bills were yet to be settled.

An embarrassed and tearful Gold, had to call Dave's employer on phone and narrated her ordeal.

An utterly amazed Dave' employer shouted over the line, "Whaaaat! You mean Dave has not come to see you since you have been at the hospital? Do you know Dave came to me several days ago that his wife(you) has some medical complications, is due for delivery and is admitted at the hospital. He said the bills required are high and up to 300k. I gave him 350k and some days off and now you are telling me this. Are you serious? I am surely going to arrest him if I ever set my eyes on him!"

Dave's employer sent over his P.A who helped to settle Gold's hospital bills and afterwards drove her and her baby home. Some days later Dave came home and according to Gold, did not even come to where their baby was lying down or even carry him.

*Dave. What kind of wickedness is this? Where have you been? What have I done to deserve all these treatment. What of the innocent baby? What has he done?" Gold confronted Dave.

"Is that a new way to welcome someone? If you are not happy I came back, you tell me I leave," Dave retorted angrily.

"Happy you came came back? Are you OK? Don't I deserve some explanations? Is this still a marriage? What has entered you."? Gold cried and shouted.

Dave ignored her, went to the wardrobe, and started picking some clothes and putting in a bag. Gold went after him and continued, "Dave I am talking to you. Even your boss is looking for you. What did you use the 350k you lied to him that was for my hospital bills settlement to do? You are so freaking wicked!"

Dave still didn't say anything. He zipped up the bag he had packed some clothes, walked around an amazed Gold to make way for himself, and then walked out of the house, jamming the door loudly after him amidst the shrill cries of the baby. Gold stood too dazed to take any action.

Days turned into months and months into years, and Gold never saw or heard from Dave. Dave blocked Gold on all social media platforms and has never sent a dime for Junior's upkeep. Gold's mother-in-law also blocked her number. She now had the full morale to show Gold the hatred she has always had for her especially now that her son had "seen the light". Curiously she still left Gold as a Facebook friend till date and even posts pictures of Junior she took from Gold's timelines to post on her own timelines during Junior's birthdays.She has never sent a dime to her grandson she parades on her Facebook page. I sought to know from Gold why her mother-in-law still left her as a friend on Facebook.
"Perhaps as a monitoring spirit", Gold replied with a smile.

Gold learnt from one of Dave's cousins that came to Asaba that Dave now has another woman who has given birth to a kid for him and that Dave's mum knows about Dave's whereabouts this past 5 years. Dave has callously moved on leaving Gold to her fate!

Gold is a pretty and cheerful lady. She is just 35 but looks younger than that despite her ordeals. In view of this, she is ready to remarry and have been getting advances from several eligible men but there is a problem. There is a traditional rite done by her uncle and her relatives with the consent of her husband during her traditional marriage ceremony. The rites performed were such that if any man other than her husband sleeps with her, they would stick together in thar copulation state for 3 days with possibility of death if the husband does come to break the spell. For this rite to be voided, Gold's bride price must be returned to Uyo after some "cleansing" has been done on her by her uncle and the relatives. I asked Gold why she allowed the rites to be performed on her in the 1st place and she told me she was young and naive and never imagined that Dave would turn to a monster.

Before the fuel subsidy removal, Gold said it would cost about ₦68,000 in traveling to her place, a hired bus to take her uncle and the relatives to her place of cleansing, and also buy some required drinks. She has not estimated what it would cost now that subsidy has been removed from fuel and transport fares and prices have soared.

"In all honesty, whenever I get a reasonable money, i channel it 1st to my son's upkeep and the small business I am using to sustain myself before thinking the traditional stuff. But I truly want my freedom back and want to feel like a woman again. God help me", Gold said.

I asked Gold what her pastors have done for her and if they couldn't break the hold of the ritual on her and she told me they have prayed for her but still advised her to "Give unto Caesar what is Caesar's" and hence she was scared to assume it's all over.

Gold is depressed and dejected. Her lovely smiles and pretty face is only a mask of the emotional trauma she is silently passing through. Any pieces of advice for her is welcome.

©https://www.facebook.com/dexteritymedia?mibextid=ZbWKwL

A

Try to be brief. So long a letter. I didn't read what u wrote. Na wa

graceilina:
Try to be brief. So long a letter. I didn't read what u wrote. Na wa

Cos you and most people are too lazy to read. Thanks

Too long to read, try to understand reading culture of online platform like NL

If you are a Traditionalist, please be proud and show it. Can we please stop going to Church on Sunday and being Occasional Traditionalist?

Rev. 3:15-16 shows God is not interested in 'Lukewarms'.

See ehn, Hear God for yourself ooo cos when shit hit ceiling na only go dey there ooo.

Between Did Gold complete/graduate her School of Nursing education?
If Yes, She should set job with Her RN. and proceed to do part time for her degree.

Life no be only Sex and make Her Church (Pastor) organize the money of the 'Ritual' abi which Church join dem before?

NB: some people dey go Shrine think say na Church dem dey go while some dey go Business centers.

Who get the summary abeg?

ckc:
Cos you and most people are too lazy to read. Thanks

What a waste to read such.

After I patiently read hoping is your marital story you later paste link for what?.

Well, I took time out to read through this touching story. Gold deserves to be happy at life again. No one deserves to be treated like this.

She should brace up and move on. She's 35yrs old and not getting younger. Life is better lived with a companion. She should do whatever she can, go back to Uyo and perform the traditional rite for her freedom. Everything she did for Dave was due to trust and commitment.

Gold, if you're seeing this, there's a lot in store for you. Don't give up. You deserved to love and be loved... But this time, marry someone you truly love, especially someone whose family openly shows love and welcomes you into their family. Marriage isn't just about the person you're marrying, but, about the family

Peace

Horrible news.

Some men are indeed wicked!

ckc:
Cos you and most people are too lazy to read. Thanks

How is that long epistle going to help the reader? If everyone start writing their story you think you will finish it? If you didn't learn summary in school, go and ask for a refund.

So in summary what are u talking about

Her priority should be to go to village and void the rite, which was unnecessary in the first place.

That 'nice nice' from Chicken Republic staff is always funny to me anytime I hear it 😄

emmancipated:
Her priority should be to go to village and void the rite, which was unnecessary in the first place.

That 'nice nice' from Chicken Republic staff is always funny to me anytime I hear it 😄

Lol...so you hear it too. Is it nice nice or rice rice sef

ckc:
Cos you and most people are too lazy to read. Thanks

is not a matter of laziness how do you want us to read that long story next time let it b shorter than this for us to read

ckc:
PRAY AND FAST NOT TO HAVE THE KIND OF MARRIAGE I HAD!

She is suffering depression. She needs help. She is from Cross River State. Her husband has left and abandoned her with one child for over 4 years and she can't remarry not because she doesn't want to but a traditional rite was done on her with the consent of the husband that any man that sleeps with her will be stuck in her for 3 days until the husband himself comes to release them....a "husband that is nowhere to be seen!"

This here is a very good example of traditional laws made to subdue women and keep them imprisoned in meaninglessness while the man remains lord over her and her life even when he is nowhere to be found. These are the type of traditional laws that women need to agitate to have done away with so they do not continue to get the short end of the stick in the name of Tradition.

ckc:
Cos you and most people are too lazy to read. Thanks

yes. I am too lazy too read! I accept that with my full chest

Kobojunkie:
This here is a very good example of traditional laws made to subdue women and keep them imprisoned in meaninglessness while the man remains lord over her and her life even when he is nowhere to be found. These are the type of traditional laws that women need to agitate to have done away with so they do not continue to get the short end of the stick in the name of Tradition.

Very very mature response.

graceilina:
yes. I am too lazy too read! I accept that with my full chest

then leave if for those who are not lazy to read.

Pat081:
is not a matter of laziness how do you want us to read that long story next time let it b shorter than this for us to read

some have read it and gave useful advice. I don't remember it being compulsory for you to read. Thanks

ckc:
some have read it and gave useful advice. I don't remember it being compulsory for you to read. Thanks

ok for those that like reading stories on like me

Hemeshemeheru:


What a waste to read such.

After I patiently read hoping is your marital story you later paste link for what?.

The link is for you to eat rice with. So it must happen to me personally for you to read it. What business of it is yours if post tbe link of my Facebook page? If you truly read, you would have noticed that i PERSONALLY interview Gold face to face real time so I don't know why it's a wasted read to you simply because I pasted my link and cos it didn't happen to me. So run along and have a nice day!

Summary

Gold is from Cross River State and her husband has left and abandoned her with one child for over 4 years. A traditional rite was done on her with the consent of the husband, meaning any man who sleeps with her will be stuck in her for 3 days until the husband comes to release them. The author met Gold face to face at Chicken Republic on a sunny Sunday afternoon in Asaba. The security guard welcomed the author with a hopeful smile. The narrator is at Chicken Republic, a busy restaurant with impatient customers, a boy with his girlfriend, and a young lady with a small kid.

The narrator recognizes Gold, a young lady with a diastema, from their Facebook pictures. The narrator then meets Junior, a male version of Gold's mum. The narrator then pats Junior's head and asks him how he is doing. The narrator then asks Junior if he is doing well. Gold is the last in a family of 4 girls from Calabar in Cross River State.

Her husband, Dave, was in the same church choir as Gold and asked for her hand in marriage. Gold was at the lowest ebb of her life, having just lost her mother and her 3 older sisters were all married out. Dave's job was a chef with one of the politicians in Abuja. Gold was married to Dave traditionally in her hometown and their mother-in-law hated her. After their marriage, Dave moved to Asaba and Gold moved in with him.

When Gold's pregnancy became due, she was admitted at St.Joseph Hospital Asaba and even when her husband's presence was required for medical procedures, he was nowhere to be found. Gold's mother-in-law said she wanted Dave to marry someone higher in the social ladder.

NairalandGossip:
Summary

Gold is from Cross River State and her husband has left and abandoned her with one child for over 4 years. A traditional rite was done on her with the consent of the husband, meaning any man who sleeps with her will be stuck in her for 3 days until the husband comes to release them. The author met Gold face to face at Chicken Republic on a sunny Sunday afternoon in Asaba. The security guard welcomed the author with a hopeful smile. The narrator is at Chicken Republic, a busy restaurant with impatient customers, a boy with his girlfriend, and a young lady with a small kid.

The narrator recognizes Gold, a young lady with a diastema, from their Facebook pictures. The narrator then meets Junior, a male version of Gold's mum. The narrator then pats Junior's head and asks him how he is doing. The narrator then asks Junior if he is doing well. Gold is the last in a family of 4 girls from Calabar in Cross River State.

Her husband, Dave, was in the same church choir as Gold and asked for her hand in marriage. Gold was at the lowest ebb of her life, having just lost her mother and her 3 older sisters were all married out. Dave's job was a chef with one of the politicians in Abuja. Gold was married to Dave traditionally in her hometown and their mother-in-law hated her. After their marriage, Dave moved to Asaba and Gold moved in with him.

When Gold's pregnancy became due, she was admitted at St.Joseph Hospital Asaba and even when her husband's presence was required for medical procedures, he was nowhere to be found. Gold's mother-in-law said she wanted Dave to marry someone higher in the social ladder.

What is this one saying?

NairalandGossip:
Summary

Gold is from Cross River State and her husband has left and abandoned her with one child for over 4 years. A traditional rite was done on her with the consent of the husband, meaning any man who sleeps with her will be stuck in her for 3 days until the husband comes to release them. The author met Gold face to face at Chicken Republic on a sunny Sunday afternoon in Asaba. The security guard welcomed the author with a hopeful smile. The narrator is at Chicken Republic, a busy restaurant with impatient customers, a boy with his girlfriend, and a young lady with a small kid.

The narrator recognizes Gold, a young lady with a diastema, from their Facebook pictures. The narrator then meets Junior, a male version of Gold's mum. The narrator then pats Junior's head and asks him how he is doing. The narrator then asks Junior if he is doing well. Gold is the last in a family of 4 girls from Calabar in Cross River State.

Her husband, Dave, was in the same church choir as Gold and asked for her hand in marriage. Gold was at the lowest ebb of her life, having just lost her mother and her 3 older sisters were all married out. Dave's job was a chef with one of the politicians in Abuja. Gold was married to Dave traditionally in her hometown and their mother-in-law hated her. After their marriage, Dave moved to Asaba and Gold moved in with him.

When Gold's pregnancy became due, she was admitted at St.Joseph Hospital Asaba and even when her husband's presence was required for medical procedures, he was nowhere to be found. Gold's mother-in-law said she wanted Dave to marry someone higher in the social ladder.

you try small. Well done

OsinAmaka:


What is this one saying?

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Who read the entire thing? Please help summarize for a concerned brother

But seriously though, as a believer in science, nobody is telling me what I want to know... What is the scientific correlation between whatever is done at traditional marriage rites and penis captivus? Like a known (and actually common) medical occurrence just happens because the "juju" detects that she slept with another man who is not her husband? Juju na artificial intelligence? Who did this to Africans, please?

Kobojunkie:
This here is a very good example of traditional laws made to subdue women and keep them imprisoned in meaninglessness while the man remains lord over her and her life even when he is nowhere to be found. These are the type of traditional laws that women need to agitate to have done away with so they do not continue to get the short end of the stick in the name of Tradition.

Same thing with all religions though. Christianity would tell her to stay in the same emotionally abusive relationship and "pray" for her grossly irresponsible partner Islam would tell her that she exists solely for the pleasure of her husband who can decide to marry as many as he likes without an iota of responsibility on his part. In summary, religion is a scam