In the early 19 century, some scientists were very curious to really understand how addiction works in the brain. So they put a rat in a small cage and placed 2 containers in the cage.

One of the container contained ordinary water and the other container is water mixed with heroin and cocaine.

The rat tasted the ordinary drinking water and felt like, 'well, nothing special.'

But when it drank the drugged water containing heroin and cocaine, it 'hit' differently. The rat preferred the drugged water and was immediately latched on to it. The rat drank the drugged water to stupor and almost killed itself with overdose in couple of weeks.

The scientists came into conclusion that when one experienced something that hit differently(dopamine hit) and feels so good, then addiction will begin automatically.

"That is our theory of addiction," they said.



In the '70s, Bruce who was an American scientist and a psychologist read their experiment and theory and wasn't satisfied with it.

He was like, "Wait, fellas, this is not cool. You placed a rat in an empty cage and gave it a choice between ordinary experience(normal drinking water) and pleasurable experience(cocaine & heroin water)........what were you expecting?"

"The rat is in an empty cage, so it has nothing doing. Of course, due to boredom, it would be immediately drawn to the drugged water and become addicted to it....this is because the drugged water provide a form of excitement."

Then Bruce was like, "let's try this differently."

So he built a beautiful Rat 'amusement' Park. The Rat Park was kind of like heaven for these rats. Everything a rat could ever wanted was in the Rat Park: different varieties of lovely food; Lots of sex; Other rats to befriend and roll with; other rat to fight and compete with; shiny and colorful balls to play with; different random holes to run into and explore. And importantly, Bruce also placed both the container with ordinary water and the one with drugged water(cocaine & heroin).

Then he observed the rat park for couple of days and weeks. He discovered something surprising: In the Rat Park, the rats don’t really fancy the drugged water. Infact, they hardly drank it. When they randomly encounter the drugged water, after tasting it, they quickly moved on (and gets carried away) with other random engaging activities in the park.

None of them got overdose or wasted by the drugged water. None of them got addicted to it.

Then Bruce came to a conclusion that addiction is largely an adaptation to an environment. Basically, if one is busy engaged in different amazing activities, then there's less likelihood of falling in to (porn) addiction.


Ok, we are just starting...

In the early 2000 or so, a French psychologist was worried about the rising 'tsunami' of porn addiction, especially among the young men.

Then after making some research, he encountered Bruce experiment and his theory of addiction... and thought it was excellent. But he was not totally satisfied.

He made some analysis:

"According to Bruce experiment, in the rat park, none of the rats fell into the addictive trap of the drugged water because there was lots of activities going on for them.

But the real world is kinda similar to the rat park: there are lots of cool activities going in on the world, but why are young men still falling into the trap of porn?"

Understand this:

The opposite of addiction is not abstinence, self-restraint or self-control.

The opposite of addiction is connection.

Basically, your addiction isn't due to boredom or lack of self-control, but it's simply due to feeling DISCONNECTED from.......

Disconnection is a state of mind. Meaning, there might be a lot of engaging activities going on around you, but you can still feel psychologically disconnected for whatever reason.

Remember, in the first experiment where the rat was placed in a small cage and they put 2 containers in the cage: ordinary water and drugged water.

The rat became addicted to the drugged water not necessarily because it enjoyed the drugged water but because it felt disconnected from the outside world.

Feeling disconnected is closely related to feeling frustrated. The frustration of being disconnected from the outside world was what led the rat to seek a sense of connection from the drugged water.

Since the rat didn't have any other rats around to connect with, it immediately bonded with the drugged water and fell in love with it.


And this is our problem has humans: our whole society is geared toward making us connect with things but disconnect with people.

Even social media that was intended to connect people to each other...actually ended playing a big role in disconnecting people... It create a toxic, comparison and competitive vibe.

After taking a picture with a good camera that enhance their looks, they edit it and remove any kind of flaws, and then they upload it for you to salivate and view. And since they want you to think that they're are living an amazing life, scrolling through their incredible photos and post will make you feel like you are not doing so well in life.

The one bad thing about social media is that it's good at showing the more fascinating parts of people's life and its bad at showing the realistic part of life.

People often flaunt their best sides and blissful moments on social media: cheerful faces, weddings, birthdays, graduations, new cars, new apartments, engagements, vacations, new jobs, parties

But....People dont flaunt their worst sides and shitty moments on social media: getting hit by a cyclist, being held in traffic, fighting with the bus conductor over change, getting rejected, messing up a project, not being able to fix a problem, arguing with someone, embarrassing yourself in front of everyone, failing an examination, not being invited to an event, getting a query letter, getting sacked at work


Now, since you're are only seeing the best part of their life on social media....you feel shitty and DISCONNECTED because you feel you are the only person going through shit in life.

Our society didn't help matters; they created more disconnections. They created a hyper-individualist; with slangs like "you are on your own" or "All man for himself,"

So while young men are hustling and grinding on their own, they still feel lonely and disconnected, and so on low-key, they try to get connection from porn, weed, video games...


Remember, since the rat didn't have any other rats around to connect with, it immediately bonded with the drugged water and fell in love with it.

Many young men find it difficult to sexually connect with the modern women. This is maybe because many of these women are selfish and lack loyalty OR have inflated ego and entitlement mentality. Or worse, many of these women have unrealistic standards and prefer to chase superficiality.

Many times, I have heard news about ladies being killed (and ofcourse they were used for rituals) because they were busy chasing superficiality and good life.

Yes, hookup, is the modern prostitution.

Nonetheless, the dating market is not welcoming for the average young man, so he's force to go into......

For example, John, a 21 years old responsible dude ask out 20 years old lady named Stella. But he was soundly rejected. This is because she's busy dating and smashing Honorable Bayo, the 60 years old senator and business tycoon who's already wealthy....duh

John has probably woo quite a number of Stella(s) in the past but they all declined him. So he feels lonely and disconnected. Although he's grinding and making effort to make his own money. But he still feels disconnect regardless, so he decides to connect and bond with porn, just like the rat decided to bond with the drugged water.

Remember, John isn't a lazy and he isn't a miserable loser ; he's actually a hard-working serious minded dude who's very much concern about earning a living.

I have already talked about this here on nairaland.

We often make the big mistake of thinking jerking off to porn is just for lazy miserable losers.....but that's wrong.

Many of the world’s respected celebs and top figures have admitted to masturbation and porn.... The likes of Eva Longoria, Dustin Hoffman, John Mayer, 50 CENT, Tailor Momsen, AMBER ROSE, Rihanna, AUBREY O’DAY, ROBERT DOWNEY JR, KANYE WEST and many others have reveal the fact that they sexually play with themselves and jerk off from time to time.

Some even say they do it all the time...for example, AMBER ROSE said in an interview that she masturbate all the time. Infact she said she masturbate at least once a day....

JOHN MAYER once said, Jerking off has save him from petty issues, he even said:

"I have masturbated myself out of serious problems in my life"

So it doesn't make sense to associate porn and jerking off to being a loser.

Let's use Kanye West as a case study...
Kanye west is your standard example of a successful and alpha guy...He's goes to the gym. He lives an exciting life. He's very confident.. he's doesn't give a Bleep about what people thinks of him. He's a famous. He's a billionaire. He's a ....Whatever, duh!

But guess what's he once reveal in an interview that he jerk off to pornography times without number. He reveal that he's even addicted to it.

The real issue, as Kanye West stated: his porn addiction didn't start now; it started way back in the years before he became rich and famous.

Just like John who felt lonely and DISCONNECTED because he couldn't get Stella and every other girls he's attracted to... Kanye was unable to get the female he desired to also desire him.

Although Kanye was broke at that time, but he was seriously grinding and making effort to create music, make a name for himself and be a successful man. But he still feels sexually disconnected regardless....then he decided to connect and bond with porn and jerking off, just like the rat decided to bond with the drugged water.

Now, he finally made it and becomes very rich and famous. He has lots of women chasing him and trying to get with him. But he's still attached to porn regardless....this is because Porn was the only thing that was there for him when he was nothing, broke and disconnected from the outside world.

Now, many women wants to connect and bond with Kanye, but he still pledge is loyalty to "porn" who didn't turned his back on him when he was a nobody.

Porn is like that overly attached girlfriend who was there with you when you had nothing, but now you have start succeeding and making money you want to dump her and connect with other women. Of course, she's not gonna accept that. She will fight for your love by any possibile means.


Many people don't realize this: Porn is the reason why Kanye got separated from Kim.

When you connect and bond with porn during the DISCONNECTED times of your life.... And then fortunately, things change a bit and women start noticing you, porn will get jealous and prevent you from connecting with those women.

So.....

It's funny how people blame porn for their lack of success. But, as you've read so far, that's big lie. The likes of Kanye West, 50 CENT, JOHN MAYER and even your naija artists, SMALL DOCTOR and others were jerking off to porn and still became successful regardless.

In my works and interactions, I have met numbers of goal-oriented minded dudes who watch porn, but they are still high achievers in the market and business world.

Again...It's funny how people blame porn for their loneliness. The reality is, watching porn and jerking off ISN'T the reason why you lonely. It's quite the opposite. Being lonely is the reason why you are jerking off to porn.

If you're a young man and you find it difficult to get the women you want, please don't settle for porn; you deserve better.

Simply click the link in my profile or signature and learn how you can genuinely improve your game with "real-life" beautiful women in a fast and remarkable way.

Can you summarize in 3 sentences pls😎

Na only who get time fit read this your epistle 😎😎

can someone summarize?

Great post. I totally enjoyed reading

Nice read sha...

but porn getting jealous when you eventually find a woman for yourself is a myth...stop eet

What an epistle..

"Even social media that was intended to connect people to each other...actually ended playing a big role in disconnecting people... It create a toxic, comparison and competitive vibe."

"After taking a picture with a good camera that enhance their looks, they edit it and remove any kind of flaws, and then they upload it for you to salivate and view. And since they want you to think that they're are living an amazing life, scrolling through their incredible photos and post will make you feel like you are not doing so well in life."

. . . A nice read for a Sunday afternoon 🥯☕

Some lazy ass people would say it's too long for them to read 😅.


This is front page worthy, thanks op, it was a nice read, learnt a lot too, I still haven't seen that one thing I will be addicted to, I watch porn whenever I want, maybe ones a month or twice, but I can't jerk off to porn, no way, I prefer banging my girls hardcore than watching too idiot have sex and the next thing is jerking off, no way,

I do all my things in moderation.
Moderation is key. 😎

Porn and masturbation is helping our society, it reduces crime significantly, makes one not to worship puxzy and stick to his principles, mostly importantly gives you pleasure and fun



If all men masturbate and watch porn
*we wouldn’t have excessive population leading to high rate of poverty

*Women would have had something to bring on the table cos their asses and boobs are no longer an asset

*rape cases would be almost nonexistent

* prostitution, hookups, cheating and adultery would reduce rapidly

*men will be more focused to the greatness of humanity

*money will become less important

* low rate of corruption and discreet parties

*reduction in religious superstitions

It’s endless

What a write up...porn getting jealous when you finally connect with a woman is not a myth but a fact...nice epistle

It also helps our brothers and sisters at the vatican...

Epic

Very interesting thought. You did well OP

No matter how busy you're there must be a time of privacy.

Nice write up.

True words. Very apt.

A great read, very edifying.

Thank you.

MrBrownJay1:
can someone summarize?

What stops you from reading it instead of begging to be spoon fed like a newborn.

I read everything word for word and I must admit that this is a great piece.

Sucre6:

Some lazy ass people would say it's too long for them to read 😅.


This is front page worthy, thanks op, it was a nice read, learnt a lot too, I still haven't seen that one thing I will be addicted to, I watch porn whenever I want, maybe ones a month or twice, but I can't jerk off to porn, no way, I prefer banging my girls hardcore than watching too idiot have sex and the next thing is jerking off, no way,

I do all my things in moderation.
Moderation is key. 😎

You watch porn but don't jerk off?

You dey lie

obinna58:
Porn and masturbation is helping our society, it reduces crime significantly, makes one not to worship puxzy and stick to his principles, mostly importantly gives you pleasure and fun



If all men masturbate and watch porn
*we wouldn’t have excessive population leading to high rate of poverty

*Women would have had something to bring on the table cos their asses and boobs are no longer an asset

*rape cases would be almost nonexistent

* prostitution, hookups, cheating and adulatory would reduce rapidly

*men will be more focused to the greatness of humanity

*money will become less important

* low rate of corruption and discreet parties

*reduction in religious superstitions

It’s endless

This is wrong. Negative impact of watching porn/masturbation surpass the positive.

1. Getting hot everytime
2. Erectile dysfunction
3. Hair loss
4. Back aching
5. Tiredness after wanking
6. Lusting
7. Not bold enough to approach women
8. Remorseful after masturbating
9. Wasting your time looking for the perfect scripted porn.
10. You can get to a point of not getting hard without watching porn
11. Brain fa.g
12. Someone that was once addicted to porn and got free will never advise anyone to watch porn or masturbate

Great write up but what i want to argue is that masturbation dey cause setbacks, you might be successful but you wont reach your peak. You'll do better if you're not masturbating.

Nice illustrations

Olamilekxy:


You watch porn but don't jerk off?

You dey lie

I don'tt know you personally, and i don't have no reason lying

First of all, the site of two idiot fucking don't excite me to the extent of jerking off, I rather call my girls to come over for a sex session than jerking off. I don't masturbate, believe it or not, your body and brain reacts the way I train it.

Nice write up.

Olamilekxy:



This is wrong. Negative impact of watching porn/masturbation surpass the positive.

1. Getting hot everytime
2. Erectile dysfunction
3. Hair loss
4. Back aching
5. Tiredness after wanking
6. Lusting
7. Not bold enough to approach women
8. Remorseful after masturbating
9. Wasting your time looking for the perfect scripted porn.
10. You can get to a point of not getting hard without watching porn
11. Brain gay
12. Someone that was once addicted to porn and got free will never advise anyone to watch porn or masturbate

There’s no physical harmful effect of masturbation, it has been proven many times by professionals, so what you wrote up there are lies concocted by you and you alone though I can help enlighten you more on the health benefits of masturbation to make your life better
1. Masturbation enhances sex life
2. it prevents anxiety and depression
3. Increases lifespan
4. Lowers the risk of prostrate cancer
5. Relieves tension
6. Alleviate pain and aches
7. Improves sleep
8. Improves heart health

Keep your thanks, I’m only doing you free favor so as learn and be grateful

Round of applause to the OP for putting the write up together.

My only comma with your article is that you end it with wanting to teach men how to up their game.

I would have loved if you put forward a couple of practical steps to CONNECT or RECONNECT (as the case may be) as a way of overcoming porn as an addiction

Cool

Nice one op..

obinna58:

There’s no physical harmful effect of masturbation, it has been proven many times by professionals, so what you wrote up there are lies concocted by you and you alone though I can help enlighten you more on the health benefits of masturbation to make your life better
1. Masturbation enhances sex life
2. it prevents anxiety and depression
3. Increases lifespan
4. Lowers the risk of prostrate cancer
5. Relieves tension
6. Alleviate pain and aches
7. Improves sleep
8. Improves heart health

Keep your thanks, I’m only doing you free favor so as learn and be grateful

😂😂
All you listed is wrong , west ( Americans) tried to normalize masturbating by pushing agenda, Google the important of masturbating and all you listed will pop up but experience is the best teacher, people that have succeeded in quitting masturbating knows that all you listed is a pure lie, kanye , banky W and some celeb came out and advocated against PMO.


Experience is ahead of scientific proof.

I'll never watch porn or masturbate even if it was recommended to me by a doctor.

Sucre6:


I don'tt know you personally, and i don't have no reason lying

First of all, the site of two idiot fucking don't excite me to the extent of jerking off, I rather call my girls to come over for a sex session than jerking off. I don't masturbate, believe it or not, your body and brain reacts the way I train it.

Hnmm, have heard you.

Olamilekxy:

😂😂
All you listed is wrong , west ( Americans) tried to normalize masturbating by pushing agenda, Google the important of masturbating and all you listed will pop up but experience is the best teacher, people that have succeeded in quitting masturbating knows that all you listed is a pure lie, kanye , banky W and some celeb came out and advocated against PMO.


Experience is ahead of scientific proof.

I'll never watch porn or masturbate even if it was recommended to me by a doctor.

We go with facts and not personal beliefs, you’ll not watch porn bcoz you’re afraid of unknown consequences like going to hell after death or being unlucky
Masturbation is not and will never be the reason you failed in life, the earlier you acknowledge this the better you hold your destiny and drive wheels yourself

I really love this write up