na wa ohh.dis one na thread?

M M M:

a 2nd wife will do

No well-to-do man will allow his wife to suffer these inconveniences.  There is no reason why anyone should dedicate 6:am to 10pm for a job. What is the essence of such job ?  Personally I do not see why anyone in Nigeria should be working for anyone. There are so many enterpreneural opportunities than employment opportunities. White collar mentality is killing a lot of people. Pull off that coat and tie or suit as the case might be and go into importation or production or whole sale business and you will be home and making money while people are running around and calling you Boss, just like me

Honestly this is one of the reasons why I chose to leave Nigeria, I was born and bred in Ibadan where we're used to take things so easy. After I got fed up with my dwindling biz I decided to look for work in Lagos but most of the jobs available are bank jobs I use my brother and sister in law who are both bankers as a case study and concluded that I do not want to live my life like them. For me my morning sleep is very important to me and I can't be bothered to get up from bed before 6.30am the earliest, this obviously is not possible in Lagos especially with a bank job.

I hope the young,female bankers(tellers,customer service reps) are reading oh.

Most of them think that wearing the best shoes,clutching the latest BB,fixing and changing Brazilian weaves forthnightly is the in-thing.Failure to save/have plans for the future and over indulging in "looking good" when they were singles are some of the things that trapped most married female bankers in the system.

nikkykay:

Forget abt how the meal aspect is being taken care of, how about the up bringing of the children? Men will care about the s3x & the meals but do they really bother about the training of the kids? They believe its the woman's responsibility but they dont wont show it.
Even if your mother or house help is around to cater for them, they cant be brought up well unlike when the parents esp the woman is there to monitor them. Nobody will look after your children the way u dont
I dont support this kinda work for a family woman and the reason most pple go for it its cos of the money or to assist the husbands.
How could a woman leave home in the morning @ 6am and come in by 930pm & go to bed 11pm Do u hav time to check the kids? wot kinda lifestyle is that?!!! do u know wot househelp does wit your kids or how s/he lives his/er life??
But i think it is better to earn lesser than wot banking sector is paying and have time for the family than earning much and family is falling apart gradually esp the children as dey grow up.

What type of upbringing are you talking about
Kids spend most of their time in school 7am to 4pm (9hrs) mon-fri , meaning its teachers that train most of the kids including full house wives and business women kids. Why do business woman take their kids to school for such a long period, because to enable them run their businesses or give them time to rest. Let me ask you, what about the kids in boding school?

my kids
Between 4pm after school when they get back home they’ll take their bath, take their second lunch, do their home work, wash cartons around 7pm take their dinner and go to bed or atimes wait for our return. We meet them awake in the evening sometimes and see them fully as well in the morning, they’ll even give you reports about what happened previous day (you know children now a days). And we have weekends to enjoy ourselves. In this situation if we have any occasion we go with them because we don’t like anything to take our weekends away from us because of the kids. My kids school is equal to the task as well ( I mean in terms of any illness, there’s in house doctor in the school compound they have all their medical informations and they do check up on them every 3 months). My mum used to come around when they were still babies but has stopped. I have 7yrs, 5yrs & 2yrs+ kids, and they’re doing very great. I and my hubby show them lots of love, and the kids have noticed that, one day my first dota was forced to say (Mum & Dad I love you all cos you care for us) and we were pleased to hear that.   That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t discipline/correct them when they go wrong.

Friends I don tire to answer una questions 

But pls do all Bankers close late? Or some deliberately stay back to enjoy ,

.

LeoMax:

No well-to-do man will allow his wife to suffer these inconveniences.  There is no reason why anyone should dedicate 6:am to 10pm for a job. What is the essence of such job ?  Personally I do not see why anyone in Nigeria should be working for anyone. There are so many enterpreneural opportunities than employment opportunities. White collar mentality is killing a lot of people. Pull off that coat and tie or suit as the case might be and go into importation or production or whole sale business and you will be home and making money while people are running around and calling you Boss, just like me

[quote][/quote]

Mr boss thank God for your life.
i believe you know some of our reach top guys wives that are doing official jobs
Did i tell you am suffering or my hubby is doing bad?
Do you think is by telling your wife to sit at home or run business that will make her not to suffer?
There's advantage and disadvantage in everything we do in life
I have been working for the past 10yrs in a banking industry and i know how many people i have helped to secure a job including my siblings, is that not a + to those souls. I have access to loan anytime any day, i travel to any country of my choice including my kids & hubby during vacation @ the expense of my office. Just imagine if i were a full house wife or running a small scale buziness.
Its where i found myself and am not complaining in my marriage. if my hubby is well to do or not well to do, is not any person's biz. We understand ourselves, life goes on

Alldruns:

But pls do all Bankers close late? Or some deliberately stay back to enjoy ,

Not all
like me, i close 5-6pm but the distance from my office to my house is far because of the heavy traffic on the road

Different strokes for different folks.

@ Alldruns what type of enjoyment are you talking about?

i hope is not what am thinking?

mummy3:


What type of upbringing are you talking about
Kids spend most of their time in school 7am to 4pm (9hrs) mon-fri , meaning its teachers that train most of the kids including full house wives and business women kids. Why do business woman take their kids to school for such a long period, because to enable them run their businesses or give them time to rest. Let me ask you, what about the kids in boding school?

my kids
Between 4pm after school when they get back home they’ll take their bath, take their second lunch, do their home work, wash cartons around 7pm take their dinner and go to bed or atimes wait for our return. We meet them awake in the evening sometimes and see them fully as well in the morning, they’ll even give you reports about what happened previous day (you know children now a days). And we have weekends to enjoy ourselves. In this situation if we have any occasion we go with them because we don’t like anything to take our weekends away from us because of the kids. My kids school is equal to the task as well ( I mean in terms of any illness, there’s in house doctor in the school compound they have all their medical informations and they do check up on them every 3 months). My mum used to come around when they were still babies but has stopped. I have 7yrs, 5yrs & 2yrs+ kids, and they’re doing very great. I and my hubby show them lots of love, and the kids have noticed that, one day my first dota was forced to say (Mum & Dad I love you all cos you care for us) and we were pleased to hear that.   That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t discipline/correct them when they go wrong.

Friends I don tire to answer una questions 

like cc said, wots ur 2yrs doing @ school for 9hrs? just to keep him from being alone dreby waiting for his siblings so as to go home together i guess!
Must you work on the isalnd and as a banker? Dnt tell me there r no other jobs u can do that will make u get home earlier? HWy will u allow ur children to wake up that early? do u think its good for them?
There are better things u can do if u r not getting a white collar job?
U r saying children in boarding school? Do they have opportuninty or the kinda exposure to the world that the day students  have? They are being monitored around unlike the day students that have access to watch anythg on TV, seeing all manner of things in the neighborhood and environment.

chaircover:

@mummy did you say that 2 year olds spend 9 hours in school? What will a 2 year old be learning for that long? Many adults going to full time jobs here only spend a average of 8 hours at work with one of those hours being a lunch break.

I am not here to judge or critisize but I am not sure what deep converstaions can you have with a kid at 9:30pm; a child who has been up since 5am. You are probably too tired mentally as well to hold down a conversation, do homework, check their bags (that they havent brought home someone elses eraser) etc, but its good that you have the weekends sussed out.

I feel you though; Living and working in Lagos is not the easiest of feats.

@chaircover, the conversation is always in the morning about the previous day, when we all wake up.
When i retunr in the night, i am always checking their body to know if their body temperature is ok
for my 2yrs+, they sleep atimes in the school if they feel like, they have bed for the kids, and why he waits till 4pm is because of his siblings so that they can come home together in a school bus, we're paying extra fee for his extra waiting time with His teacher. 

@MUMMY3
Really admire your positive approach to handling such a challenge in you daily schedule and say keep the doing the good work. I feel in a country like our Great Nigeria, jobs like this will never pay you enough for your service rendered. From what you have described about your ability to manage time and a whole lot more you may have not disclosed, you are better of working for yourself. With your our business, its a win win situation both at Home/Business. It not always easy at the beginning but it pays at on the long run.

Seriously, the only times I spent 9hours in school was when I was in Senior secondary.

Living and working in Lagos is not the easiest of feats

no, its not.

nikkykay:

like cc said, wots your 2yrs doing @ school for 9hrs? just to keep him from being alone dreby waiting for his siblings so as to go home together i guess!
Must you work on the isalnd and as a banker? Dnt tell me there r no other jobs u can do that will make u get home earlier? HWy will u allow your children to wake up that early? do u think its good for them?
There are better things u can do if u r not getting a white collar job?
U r saying children in boarding school? Do they have opportuninty or the kinda exposure to the world that the day students  have? They are being monitored around unlike the day students that have access to watch anythg on TV, seeing all manner of things in the neighborhood and environment.

Sis have u seen well trained / monitored pastors, reverened, bishops children that have gone astray today.
like @tellmemore mentioned above (diff strokes for diff folks)
A child that want to spoil will spoil
But that doesnt mean, we shouldnt train our kids according to God's ways

tripleace:

@MUMMY3
Really admire your positive approach to handling such a challenge in you daily schedule and say keep the doing the good work. I feel in a country like our Great Nigeria, jobs like this will never pay you enough for your service rendered. From what you have described about your ability to manage time and a whole lot more you may have not disclosed, you are better of working for yourself. With your our business, its a win win situation both at Home/Business. It not always easy at the beginning but it pays at on the long run.

thanks my love, i appreciate.

Abegiii, u all free mummy3. as long as i am concerned, she is a good wife and most likely a good mum. Na naija we dey abegiiii.

This thing does not only affect bankers alone. So many average workers here in Lagos suffer the same fate as a result of hold ups on the road. Imagine closing from work at 5:30-6:00pm at VI, b4 u could board a vehicle home, 30 minutes are gone. From VI to say Ajah u spend 2 hours in traffic. The next morning u wake up by 4:30 to prepare for work to avoid being held up in traffic.
Abeg make una free bankers.

but the ones who are fooling around among them [not the op]- what time do they use to do this?

cant figure it out.

weekends?

Demdem:

Abegiii, u all free mummy3. as long as i am concerned, she is a good wife and most likely a good mum. Na naija we dey abegiiii.

No mind them. hypocrites

in the US its natural for a person to work hours far longer than what the a mummy3 is describing



Abeg Mummy3 carry on jare nothing do you!!

Demdem:

Abegiii, u all free mummy3. as long as i am concerned, she is a good wife and most likely a good mum. Na naija we dey abegiiii.

Thanks oo @demdem, hungry don dey cash me for answering questions.
My people anyhow we most survive, God dey.
I love my hubby, I love my kids & I enjoy my work equation balanced na only holdup stress dey finish us @ least i dey close a bit early 5-6pm
We're moving to suruelere next year January by God's Grace, at least s/lere - v/i is a bit closer, and my mum lives in s/lere.

in the US its natural for a person to work hours far longer than what the a mummy3 is describing

not its not, unless its your own business.

its even illegal to work so long without paying heavy overtime, and that's why most employers try to avoid such.

twinskenny:


what if her job is the one keeping the family? must she now resign just to cater for the kids alone? will she used stone to pay there school fees? she is always with the kids every night and everymorning, not like shift job,  saturday and sunday is there as well to look after her kids. i bet you are not in Lagos thats why u are talking like that,  not only bankers surfer this kind of stress,  some other profession do too. what if you are working on the island and you leaving somewia around sango ota or some place far? what wi ll u do? u wake up early and u return late,  the kids will be fine

My dear is not everybody that will see the way you're seeing it. thanks for understanding

It so interesting how it's easy to stir up mix reactions by a positive response(MUMMY3 being the focus) and nothing is being said about the 2nd & 3rd comments on this topic.

Female Bankers are not wife materials to be candid!!

Itz nut easi o 2 marri a female banka BUT dis is naija were jobz r rili rili scare &
4 dose DISPORANZ insultin/accusin mumi3 u r all ****
@mumi3 abeg cari go joor

This question should swing both ways cos even wives of Banker husbands suffer as well,

I have never dated a banker but I know of a friend who is married to one, Simply put, he single-handedly raised their two kids because she was hardly ever around, He drove them to school, picked them up, did their homework, made supper (with the help of the maid) and put the kids to bed most nights before she returned, When I asked him how he felt, he said he met her as a banker, and wouldnt want to stiffle her career growrth for any reason,

very risky.

smh.

Why is it that in some peoples young age they condemn bankers or reject to work in a bank?
But when they grow older and have grown up kids, they'll want them to work in the bank and they’ll be so proud to tell people that my son or dota is a Bank Manager.  

People keep worrying about banks closing time. Banks normal closing time is 4pm to customers as we all know. And the official staff closing time is 5pm. Its only in branches operations where they’re having balancing issues that’s what normally keep them late.  And another problem is, as a branch operational staff, you have to wait for your boss to finish before you all can go together, because the boss would be scared of being alone in the banking hall, and there are some wicked bosses that will stay in the office and be browsing.  So if someone is lucky to be posted to a quick close branch, well.  Now a day,  Atm has really reduced numbers of queue in the banking hall, I believe they suppose to be closing earlier now, but our Lagos holdup issue is hectic.

Let me ask a question. Is it everyone we see on the road late night that are bankers?

LeoMax:

No well-to-do man will allow his wife to suffer these inconveniences.  There is no reason why anyone should dedicate 6:am to 10pm for a job. What is the essence of such job ?  Personally I do not see why anyone in Nigeria should be working for anyone. There are so many enterpreneural opportunities than employment opportunities. White collar mentality is killing a lot of people. Pull off that coat and tie or suit as the case might be and go into importation or production or whole sale business and you will be home and making money while people are running around and calling you Boss, just like me

After reading this, I feel inspired and want to go out and conquer the world- EEEERRRRRRRMMM! Oga, how about a few millions as equity contribution from you so that I can start the business. I know you are Financially well-to-do.

@Mummy3, I feel offended- you have been so NICE answering people's questions and comments but you refused to answer mine! How do you handle the unholy advances of some of your bank customers and potential (bank) clients?

This is for that brilliant decent, beautiful young girl who has just gotten a job at a bank and has been given unreasonable targets to meet in her probation period whilst her family and friends are dancing "Alanta" over her success and their new STATUS! as rich banker's relatives.