If you really want to train your daughter.
Send her to your most disciplining sister and register her in a public mixed school.
Send monthly allowance to your sister
You will thank me later

tctrills:

Let's stop blaming UK for bad parenting. There are many good kids in UK and the US. If you are thinking of sending your kid to another person to train, you have failed.

UK- and US-raised human beings are actually generally more respectful, well-behaved and less corrupt than Nigerians. If you know. That's why I want to know if this girl was born in Nigeria or over there.

Zupay:


Na yarn abi, send the pikin go rural school, make we how social workers go allow you live comfortably, e sure me die say dem go first suspend you from work, begin interrogating your wife and other children, pray make ur wife no go fold and tell dem say she no agree with you take una pikin go village but you insisted, u and dat your wife and other children no go live inside the same house again because social workers go tag you a danger to your family.....u think say na 9ja u dey?

Many Nigerians do not know that overseas is not Nigeria

That's how one man I know. Him dey beat his wife for naija. Dem Japa, him bear his wife one time, someone called police for am.

Na God wey decide dem no go punish am yet. Since then, him never touch his wife violently.


Child rights in oyinbo land? People have gone to jail for one bruise on a child's body

FxMasterz:


Please, if everything you've known of the girl's terrible behavior are all based on reports from your wife and her kids, I plead with you to investigate the matter well before making any decision. Since you're not always at home, there's high probability that your wife and her kids are cooking up stories about the girl because they consider her as not being part of them, hence, they must get rid of her. I am talking from experience. In matters like these, do not trust anyone. Investigate, and confirm the reports before drawing any inference.

If the reports are found to be true, or if what you've written also include your own first hand experience with the girl, then it's advisable for you to send her back to Nigeria. The boarding school idea is not good enough as many boarding schools would add to the child's dilemma. Anyone who has attended a boarding school in Nigeria during his school days would never pray for his kids to be there.

Put her up with a disciplinarian family member here in Nigeria. Not just any family member. Such a girl needs iron hands. She must be subdued. If the disciplinarian you know is not buoyant enough to add another human under his roof, please be responsible for her financial well being while she is with the chosen family member. Some girls at that age can be very unbecoming. God will guide you aright.

This is one of the best comment here.

Please follow this advice.

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

please send her back to Nigeria for brain formatting, but make not mistake don't send her to a boarding she will learn another skill you dont like, she might end up becoming a lesbian (God forbid) if you still have parents here or grand parents you can trust send her to them to teach her what it means to be a Nigerian

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

So Nigeria is where they train mad ppl ?
You trusted your wife so much.

Oga place a hidden camera to investigate what have been happening in your absence.

You want to send your daughter to a boarding school in Nigeria so that she will corrupt the students.

Anybody advise u before u japa go where u no go fit discipline ur children?

There are more pressing issues here in Nigeria that affects millions of people.

Deal with your japa problems.



But pls, Nigeria is not for bad children. She ll be fine right there where u are.

Take her to faith academy at Ota in Ogun state.They will use scriptures to restore her factory settings..they will spiritually guide her.

mysticwarrior:
For the next three weeks be nice to her, use a well planned deceptive strategy to coax her into thinking she is getting the best treatment from her dad. then tell her you are takimg her to Nigeria to attend a music concert in Nigeria.

Make her believe she would personally meet wiz kid, davido, tems, rema, burna boy and her favorites nigerian artists. You may choose to do this when it's close to her birthday period and make it appear as if you want to give her a good birthday present.

When she is finally in Nigeria take her to a village school where she won't have access to a phone and Internet, that way she won't be able to communicate with her former class mates in obodo oyibo to help her contact the British or American embassy for rescue operation.

This your own take is seriously funny o

Say na rescue operation

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

fiction, fiction, fiction

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

From your words she usually misbehave when you are not at home, then you and your wife is the major problem you don't treat her fairly enough, no father's love for her, no mother's love also, so you wants to send her back to Nigeria? What about sending the other kids back... Not all women love a child that's not theirs... If the girl was the woman's daughter before you met I think this won't be an issue, and she'll never agree you send her to Nigeria... You're a man, call your daughter talk to her wit love and do your findings without being bias and you'll know why she's behaving that way

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

Have you sat her down and talked? You have to do that to see where the issue is coming from. Pr-teens have this common issue, especially girls.
It is also possible she misses her mum.
Counseling, guidance and showing her love is the issue. Your presence at how when she returns back from school will help douse the issue with her Stepmom.

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

She will be probably expelled in a boarding school. Don’t you have a relative?

Best decision is to bring her back to Nigeria hand her over to a family member you can trust till she's done with her high school and well mannered I knew of a man that brought his daughter back to Nigeria for 5years cos of her ill -manner and her behaviour changed cool, calm and sober

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

. She is your daughter. Don't send her to Nigeria and add more to her plight. The issue is when a person remarries it takes time for the children of the first marriage to get used to the new marriage. Be patient with her Talk to her early in the morning. Avoid forced acceptability. All will be well.

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

Anything wey u fit do, do am...
We are grappling with rice, beans and garri price for here..
Our wahala too much...
I no even add heat n lack of light, plus no jobs, bros u fit believe say after graduation since 2007 till now no job??
It's terrible over here, most people r now begging to survive, some r now living by the grace of God, we dey go church now hoping events fit dey wey dem go atleast food fit dey...
Bros wahala full ground, no just bring international matter come add to am.

The Stepmom doesn't want your daughter around! Women and manipulations.

Houseofglam7:
Seeking advice from total strangers on the internet over something as sensitive as this is just mind boggling!!!!

There's absolutely nothing wrong it.
Nairaland is a faceless forum.
Tinubu can be a member here and you won't know that.
Anyone can seek advice here.
Afterwards, he will filter everything and apply what works for him.

xexofe1741:
No one will take care of your biological child better than you.

Let her be under your watchful eyes and try to understand the reason for her actions.

Keep talking to her with love!

Finally, some sensible comments coming in...

I'm afraid it's too late, especially in the western world. If girls aged 13 start acting up in Europe, USA or Canada, there is very little you as an African man can do to help them.

The only total reset can only happen in Nigeria, if she lives with your mother or a very reliable, strict and honest sister.

My daughter is almost 13 too and she is about to send my ex wife, her mother, to early grave. They just don't listen at that age. Too much peer pressure and the school teachers don't care how your child turns out.

Send her to Nigeria if possible. But make a proper arrangement.

I so much love this comment honestly you just said my mind if the very father of this 13 years
child can do exactly what you wrote here believe that child will come to her right sense. Please send that child home you will never regret it. She hasn't seen the real life. That's for this very quote

phorget:
Dont just send her to Nigeria but send her to a village where she will have to go to the farm,fetch water from the stream, cook with firewood, feel the bite of mosquitoes and tsetsefly, attend village schools and then learn your local language and culture. By the time she is done experiencing all these then she will become a changed person and beg you to come to her rescue.

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

please for your sanity and her future.. bring her back ASAP

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

If this is true, bring her back to Nigeria and enrol her is a good boarding school. There are many good boarding schools out there. Keep her passport with yourself after bringing her back to Nigeria and ensure you monitor her with the help of a good relative of yours in Nigeria.

I wish you the best

mysticwarrior:
For the next three weeks be nice to her, use a well planned deceptive strategy to coax her into thinking she is getting the best treatment from her dad. then tell her you are takimg her to Nigeria to attend a music concert in Nigeria.

Make her believe she would personally meet wiz kid, davido, tems, rema, burna boy and her favorites nigerian artists. You may choose to do this when it's close to her birthday period and make it appear as if you want to give her a good birthday present.

When she is finally in Nigeria take her to a village school where she won't have access to a phone and Internet, that way she won't be able to communicate with her former class mates in obodo oyibo to help her contact the British or American embassy for rescue operation.

What if the girl is innocent, is because frustration from second wife n kids. God will not forgive you o!

She's in a society that work so she knows what she is doing, why are you disturbing her peace??

And why do you want to send her to Nigeria, a supposedly wrong society??

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

All you know is how to beat. You even want to beat her so badly that she will be taken from you.

You and your new wife have a lot of explaining to do. Your daughter isn't a saint, neither are you two. You made her that way. If boys can have conversations with her, why can't either of you? This is how Father's drive their daughters into the welcoming arms of pimps and other shady characters. The problem is never you.

What you see is what you nurtured.

when they say some Men have empty brains one would think its a joke,from what you are saying it is obvious that your new wife is trying to get her out of the way for her children.the poor girl is going though alot and you are either too stupid or too blind to use your brain,my advice take her out alone,seat with her ,talk to her so she can open up to you what is going down.yes girls from that age begin rebellion and yes boys begin to advance but anybody who tells you to take a 13 year old girl to nigerian boarding house alone without any support system is evil.if you doubt me tell your wife you want her and one of her child to go to the boarding school in Nigeria and see if she wouldnt fight you with everything she has.always know this women have devil in them especially when they consider another womans children been infront of theres.



quote author=Mrperfecto post=128611957]I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?[/quote]

Zupay:


Even if he had told her they are going to Ghana on holidays, she will certainly tell her friends here in the UK that she is going home with her dad for holidays. If she doesn't resume school the next term, that would be an issue, her friends will talk and social worker will knock at my colleague's door to explain the whereabout of the daughter. If e talk say she don start school for Ghana, not informing the UK school is a red flag as dem go even suspect say she carry the girl go do female circumcision for their village.. Police would be involved, there would be video call to the girl in Ghana and she go expose her papa and when dem go bring am come back him, she no go live with her parents again, na government get am.

All Lies! Lies bro

A teenager is acting out her age. 1. make time for her and discuss 2. Try to find if she has vices like smoking, drinking, or a boy and try to follow up calmly on it (E get why) 3. Try your best but don't let it get to you too much, "who wan spoil wan spoil"

demoBaba:
9ja boarding skool you say? she'll add with her bad behaviour.

I know so many products of Nigerian boarding schools. They are cool headed and well to do. Get sense.

brain54:
All these people saying...

Send her back to Nigeria. If the girl was living with her biological mother would it be so easy to do?

Oga OP you better find a way to manage your child's juvenile delinquency. Sending her away or running will not solve the problem.

No one will take care of your biological child better than you.

Let her be under your watchful eyes and try to understand the reason for her actions.

Keep talking to her with love!

All these over sabi trying to always sound intelligent and wise ...very annoying. U see where the oga say due to his work schedule he don't normally have time for the jezebel to be ......ur trying to discredit total summations (recommendations) of people .....here ....wetin u know?.....the man better send tht child back to Nigeria to face hardship either in a village school or command day school (army) where the oyinbo rubbish will be ridden from her