your first date.

scary topic . Well, tell us about your first date. Was he/she cool or boring? Well in my own case, I was the boring one. We spent minutes in silence thinking of what to say next. I immediately got fed up with the dating game. Lets just say it was a fiasco.

date:
1. An engagement to go out socially with another person, often out of romantic interest.
2. [I]One's companion on such an outing.[/I]

kodewrita: I immediately got fed up with the dating game.

Kodewrita, I think you need a date doctor! How can a healthy young african man talk about being fed up with the dating game?

Man, I can't really remember how my first date was, or who it was with. But I sure can remember the first girl I talked to ... you know, tried to woo. It was in '99 and she was Ugandan (I was in Uganda at the time) and older than me. But it went really well and we became pen pals ... and later cyber pals. We've lost contact now though.

First date? Yet to be experienced.

Tayotina: Huh?

You were accusing me of being inexperienced when it comes to dating and here you are saying you have not experinced your first date!

Come on Seun, the fact that I have not yet experienced my first date does not mean I don't know anything about dating.

The fact is I really don't attach much importance to it.  I go out a lot with my guyz but you know, those candle-lit dinners, scented rose, on bended knees, look into my eyes whatever, whatever ....,  those things do not trip me.  You know at times when you are at it, tension starts mounting and you start sweating and then you see some guyz messing up. See, you can take me out but not necessarily to a quite place. Take me somewhere I can enjoy myself to the max.

In other words, you have had your first date. Perhaps your dates haven't been impressive, but a date is a date whether you enjoy it or not.

Or am I missing something?

Seun, I know myself better than any other person. I go out with my guyz a lot is different from I go out with my boyfriend ok? If you should ask me anytime, anyday how I felt on my first date? My answer will still remain "yet to be experienced"

I think I understand what tayotina is trying to say. Some of us crave those embellishments, while to others it's unnecessary waste. But really, a date is not about going to the Burj Al Arab (the only 7 star and most expensive hotel in the world) or whatever, even if all he did was take you to Buka, a date is a date is a date...

Now, my first date, properly so called, was as recent as last year actually. And it was simply bliss. All that I dreamed it would be and I dream a lot, mind, so I don't say that lightly.

I had the most pamperedly nice time. So much so that all previous dates faded into insignificance, sorry.

Women. Today they love you. Tommorrow they 'realise' that they have never really loved you, so sorry the relationship is off and there's a new guy ...

So to answer kodewrita's question. I was probably my first date's 999th date. And she probably didn't consider it a date, or maybe she did but won't tell me, who knows?

Women!

Seun, I haven't given up on the dating game. I have only decided to stop following rules. As to a date doctor (that sounds familiar, hmmm, where did I hear that? 'Hitch' the movie. you've been watching too much TV).

I definitely agree dates can be stressful because of all the attached stuff (candles, nice dishes and if you are lucky a restaurant with love cubicles). Mind you, I believe both of you should know it's a date so sorry but maybe your first date wasn't a date (oops I said it).

seun:

Women. Today they love you. Tommorrow they 'realise' that they have never [I]really[/I] loved you, so sorry the relationship is off and there's a new guy ...

So to answer kodewrita's question. I was probably my first date's 999th date. And she probably didn't consider it a date, or maybe she did but won't tell me, who knows?

Women!

Dear Admin.,

Don't let's even go there! If a woman loves you today and falls out of love with you tomorrow, not being a mad woman and all, is it not worth pondering over if maybe some crucial thing changed in you or worse still that you never had that 'thing' but simply pretended to be who you weren't just to get her undivided attention? It's been known to happen, you know? At least a ZILLION times.


MEN!!!

Ra, it is a well known fact that men lie and pretend a lot when trying to woo women. the fact that women keep falling for it means maybe they have fundamental issues!

But the fact remains that the average woman would not accept the average man for just being himself. The average guy knows that he can improve his chances by wooing you with behaviours that are not really part of who he is! Like maybe helping you with housework

Women demand to be lied to and that is what they get! Oops, we're supposed to be talking about our first dates ...

Seun that is where you are wrong. I can not stand a guy who is not himself. And I would tell you right there and then that if you want to be with me or go out with me you have got to be like yourself. I can not stand dishonesty or trying to put up a show or fronting and all that because I will know when your are trying so hard to impress.

As for me, I like a guy who is also a friend. I mean we have fun together nothing so uptight or those uncomfortable moments. I like people to feel comfortable around me and I also encourage that. That is why I am open to any discussion and also the topics that I bring up kind of shock people because they want to talk about it but they just do not know how to go about it so I just help them out after all we are all adults.

Well my idea of a date, I do not want all those fancy places because I for one am an active person and sitting still for a longtime will just bore the hell out of me. I love to dance so our date could be, we drive thrrough a fast food restaurant and then we go clubbing or just to do something fun!!! like bowling or just any thing. I mean ok once in a while it would be good to go for a romantic dinner and all that. One thing all these fancy stuff do not really matter to me.

I mean simple good stuff make me feel good so I think that whoever I am going to date would be very lucky because I do not even like people paying for me so we would probably share the bills. Like I said he would also be a friend as well as a boyfriend so he would feel that awkward about us sharing the bills but I guess once in a while I will just let him pay to satisfy his male ego ...

It is all about the honesty. If you have anything to say to me better say it to my face. One thing iis that I ask questions that people are thrown off but that is just me. I mean, I am not rude or anything like that. It is just that they feel uncomfortable mentioning those so I just help them out.

When I go on a date I take it as hanging out I mean it is a mind set that I take up so that it does not seem that awkward but just that it is a little bit more than just hanging out at the same time ...

I will only go so far with Seun about the facts of life. There will always be the exception or exceptions to the rule. funny enough, there are exceptions within those exceptions@!! lol

One point though is:[list]

[li]The typical woman will say to the man: "I have never felt anything like this in my former relationship(s) ..."
Seun, I wonder along with you what she told the previous dude![/li]

[li]The typical dude tells the chic, "I will always love you". Once the word "yes" comes forth, tolerance and the patience levels slump like microsoft shares!![/li][/list]

Let's get back to the point. My first date was friend rice and chicken no doubt at a cosy place. (I cant really remember details of most "first" times) But I must have given myself a pat on the back for being the stand up guy afterwards. I am waiting for 7 star hotels, and very private settings for two. Maybe I will come by againt to post about my "new first" ever date.

A word to Tayotina though: the way you described that romantic date in your first post hints that you are still waiting for that dream to come true. Try me! My number is 080 ...

Femi, Femi, Femi, how many times did I call you?

It seems you are trying to toast all the chicks in Nairaland or you are trying to tell us the meaning of your name ...

First with Trish and now Tayotina ...

[I]I comment my reserve[/I]

By the way, never had a date ...

thank God

First dateWell, I was so inexperienced at the time, while my "baby" was sooo experienced, so she sort of virtually took over, except of course paying for things bought.

It was at first quite, but as the evening rolls up, My mouth opens and being chattery herself, we sort of end it up on a good note....although there was no touching, which i guess she wanted.

That eventually stoppedour seeing, So I sort of made it up for the next girl without going too far.

It was generally a sweet one sha

I've always tried to avoid it, but the day it came, because of my inexprience, it was dry (so to say).

That day I think it rained so it was so cold and the AC in that joint was on, so I was shaking. There was nothing to say!

Anyway I enjoyed it, but it wasn't funny.

Well,my first date was too much,the guy was crazy about me and ready to sell his shirt just to buy me anything i want,
and something to talk about??
Um!!nobody can ever be bored when you are around me.so i would say...
My first date was a SLAM!!!!
meaning:a complete success!!

tayotina:


The fact is I really don't attach much importance to it. I go out a lot with my guyz but you know, those candle-lit dinners, scented rose, on bended knees, look into my eyes whatever, whatever ...., those things do not trip me

tayotina, wat else could be more romantic than the scene u described above? if u dont attach much importance to it, i will understand, but for the fact that it doesnt trip u.....that i dont understand o!!!

@pinky i agree with u. why anybody won't be impressed by that i don't know. Tv has created the impression that that works. So its a shock that it doesn't work in your case. of course other factors will always affect the issue.

Pinky,

Thank God you are Pinky and I am Tayotina. That means we are two different persons. Really those things do not trip me. Some say I am weird but that is the Tayo in me. Maybe when you get to know me better, you would understand.

Kodewrita,

TV has created the impression that it works, well not for me because some men tend to put up their best behaviour at that moment. So just come out of your shock, ok? Remember, one man's meat is another man's poison!!!!

My first date was the bomb.

The guy and I had a date in a eatery. But on getting there, I met him waiting outside the place. He said he just had a sudden change of heart and we should please go somewhere else. So off we went.

I was shocked to discover he was taking me to a crib (a house) which turned out to be his.

I couldn't be annoyed because, gosh!, when I entered that house, I was dumbfounded at the way he had set the table for us. It was so so romantic. I was managing to hide how impressed I was. We had a candle-lit dinner for two!

After dinner, we listened to cool music. I am an extrovert, so we had so many thinks to talk about. It was getting late. I stood to go home ... because the environment was getting too cosy. I didn't want to regret my actions, so I just had to leave!

He drove me home, and as I got out of the car, I leaned by this window side (a girl's trick if you must know) and he gave me that kiss. Hulalalalal!

It was a perfect date ... I dont want anyone reading my this reply and getting jealous of me, ok?

I don't want anyone reading my this reply and getting jealous of me, ok?

As if that's not the point of this whole story!

Do you know that, as a guy, I can simply memorize and reproduce this romantic scene with just about any girl without actually feeling anything for her? Do you know that, in fact, it is harder for us to be so 'romantic' when we have genuine feelings vs when we're trying to score or achieve some other objective?

oluwaseun osewa.. point of correction, am not saying i fell for him, neither did i tell u we went into a relationship, i am only answering the question "how was ur first date"
so dont tell me about wat u guys feel or not cos i already know that u guys re good at putting up an act most times
i never said all he did got into my head, i only made it known that i enjoyed my first date & tripped for the guy's acts
shikena!

Noted.

I wonder if it qualifies, but my first date was in my house. I couldn't go to his party (he was traveling), or be seen with him, so he brought some fast food and a bottle of non alcoholic wine to my place so that we could celebrate.
I thought it was sweet, but i was too shy so i just sipped a bit of the wine and my lil bro came back from school and ate the stuff .

Cheesy, i know. But it's still the sweetest thing and the most original thing anyone has every done for me. Thats where one can say it's the thought that really counts .

tayotina:

First date? Yet to be experienced.

same here

My first date, boy o boy o boy, it was terrible. It was so bad I'm actually embarassed remembering it. The girl was beautiful, but I was a slacker and she showed it to me that I was one. If you see the way the girl yabbed (scolded) me. 'First gate kọ́ , first date ni'

Haba, Mr. take it easy on yourself now

[Editor: This post response to a post by legry in which he mentioned that the administrator asked him to re-post in normal case instead of all caps. Actually, he was asked to modify his original post. This has been done for him, and so the second post has been removed.]

Pinky [I]'your own beta joo'[/i]. Seun, don't be a spoilsport!

My own first date? I was so afraid that the guy was going to ask me to "pay" at a later date that I totally refused to eat anything!