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Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by JosBoy4Lif(m): 2:58am On Mar 29, 2006
@ Radiant
That is more than u had to say for the men, but y, and im not on ur case, i just like u wink wink
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by Radiant(f): 3:25am On Mar 29, 2006
Thanks Mr gentleman tongue I like u too tongue tongue tongue
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by glodave(f): 10:23am On Mar 30, 2006
@JosBoy4Lif, and Radiant  smiley smiley smiley
that's great!!! cheesy cheesy
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by JosBoy4Lif(m): 11:41pm On Mar 30, 2006
It trully is kiss kiss embarassed
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by jammin(m): 4:48pm On Dec 12, 2006
Damn!!!! you gotta be bleeping kidding me!!! shocked shocked shocked shocked
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by Radiant(f): 4:53pm On Dec 12, 2006
Jammin, u okay darling? wink grin
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by oshiokee(m): 3:51am On Jul 02, 2007
My dear, nigerians come in diff shapes, sizes and even colour. There's the good, the bad and the very ugly. Bottomline, nigerians are just like evry other citizens. The only snag is that we are to many and there are more notorious ones that popular ones
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by teeirl: 7:14am On Jul 02, 2007
Totally agree with Radiant a nigerian man is only good if you can believe his lies, Those boys are confound liars they even believe their own lies but unfortunately you cant help loving them, wink wink wink Is there ANY GOOD nigerian men out there
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by bjigun(m): 7:24am On Jul 02, 2007
, did someone call 4 a GOOD Handsome Nigerian Man ~ well ladies ur prayers have been answered ~ am here 2 save U, lol.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by teeirl: 9:59pm On Jul 02, 2007
@bjigun

u said a GOOD HANDSOME nigerian man dear u bettr start making some carbon copies of yourself coz we need alot of you to go round!!!!!!!!!! Dublin (Ireland) has NO good nigerian men loads of handsome ones but no good handsome ones, wink wink wink smiley
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by kulzoid4u(m): 10:41pm On Jul 16, 2007
well you should be happy you have a niger ready to love you over there
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by oluhak: 1:30am On Aug 10, 2007
Nigerian men are loving, caring, romantic, hardworking, culture oriented, articulate and meticulous. We are very submissible for any sensible lady that shows true love and understanding. Pls 4et how a Nigerian female might feel when she sees u, u are very lucky to ve met a Nigerian guy. Pls endeavour to satisfy him sexually and romantically because we do not take to this issue lightly if we are denied.

Good-luck to u pls. I do not mind to have a lady from ur end too baby?
Olu-Hak
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by USnaijagrl(f): 12:11am On Oct 11, 2007
Uuum, I would say that Jamaican women are more like Ghanaian women then they are like Nigerian women (physically as well- generally darker complexion, fuller lips, body shape/strength/muscle etc.) . And if you look it up you will see that a lot of slaves that went to Jamaica came from Ghana. A Jamaican girl friend of mine has Ashanti ancestry, oh and you could so tell by the size of her lips, lol!

But anyway, I don't really have too many words of advice, because even though I'm Nigerian, I don't usually date Nigerian men esp. Igbo men chai!! (their egos and chauvanistic attitudes I find highly unattractive). I'm currently dating a Ghanaian who values me and treats me as his Igbo queen. And although there are minor cultural differences and occasional hateration from Ghanaian girls, it's still all good, lol!

So don't be too worried about that, and i would say that you shouldn't go off generalizations, just cuz i had one too many bad experiences w/ Nigerian men, doesn't mean that the two of you won't turn out perfect. smiley I mean after all, the two cultures aren't THAT far off, and we're all black ppl.

Good luck.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by cblow(m): 4:50pm On Oct 11, 2007
autumn66,
u shld be very lucky, u gat 'a gold fish'. but if i were u, i wont ask nigerians about nigerians knowing there definitely will be some element of bias in their responses. ild rather go for fellow jamaicans that had dated nigerians in the past. that is on one side. on the other side, you have no right what so ever to generalize people from any particular country, cos everyone is different and unique. one nigerian's behaviour is not a function of another nigerian's. infact as nigerians we shld be bothered that our brother is dating you and wondering if you will meet up, knowing how hardworking our nigerian women are,
anyway enjoy it and hope something good comes out of it,
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by mellow(m): 5:03pm On Oct 11, 2007
No advice u get here will go a long way to help u. Figure things out yourself. What you see is what you get. Different individuals with different xteristics

So treat him the way you see him.
[/color][color=#990000][color=#990000][/color]
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by loofas(f): 5:09pm On Oct 11, 2007
As a Patriot, I like to tell you Shine your eyes if no be say you dey date Yahoooooooo! b :-Xz

In all honesty  Nigerians are not as bad as you people out there  think. For you not to shoot yourself in the leg;" Never think you are Holier than any one".  All this question you ask about my fellow Nigerian are you not guilty? ask yourself.  If truely you met my guy a Nigerian and you sure of his reality.  Congratulations! Niger no go show face and say them no dey go again.

Dimu Shin shin.
cool grin cheesy
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by loofas(f): 5:10pm On Oct 11, 2007
As a Patriot, I like to tell you Shine your eyes if no be say you dey date Yahoooooooo! b :-Xz

In all honesty  Nigerians are not as bad as you people out there  think. For you not to shoot yourself in the leg;" Never think you are Holier than any one".  All this question you ask about my fellow Nigerian are you not guilty? ask yourself.  If truely you met my guy a Nigerian and you sure of his reality.  Congratulations! Niger no go show face and say them no dey go again.

Dimu Shin shin.
cool grin cheesy
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by niajaLkin(f): 6:35am On Oct 21, 2007
Ok, i had to sign up 2 respond to some of these notes, I recently marry a Nigerian man who has not even been in the country for a full year, i've been here for 2o full ones, i'm truly considered to be what most consider to be a strong blk woman born in Jamaican but not the typical one. i'm not submissive but will treat my man like a king just cuz he is!!! BUT i find it so difficult to communicate with him, reason being that he doesnt take the time to listen or acknowledge that i am speaking to him, he cuts me off when im speaking and never remember anything i say to him, he doesnt like wen i tell him to do things or gives him directions, even though he doesnt know the dang way, he'd rather get lost than take directions from me. i dont usually wait for a man to open my door, pull my chair or pay for me on a date, he gets offended. if i tell him something and a man tells him the opposite, he'd rather believe that man even if it's wrong, now in da bedrm, holly shit, caveman stlye, no romance, comes quick as helll cry, dig up my cookie and thinks that's so romantic, umps off as soon as he's finish, no romance after, no compliments when i wear something sexy OMG it's like he was blind, when i put on some romantic lotion or oil, shit my cave man just jumps in and out, i i take da lead, his dick goes DEAD! never a compliment or shyt like that dont want to have sex just b4 work, always tired, only da meschanery style angry, NOW DA TV, my God it's like no woman exit when he has da remote, it's all sports and new bk and forth, never thinking that i dont like either one of them, i mean all day none stop and im not exaggerating one bit, if i change it when he gets up it goes right bk. DONT GET ME WRONG, he's sweet as ever, soft spoken when speaking English, very hard working, religious, and kind strong willed but Lord hepl me, there is a big culture shock da man is a true Niger, there is no if or buts and i am not stereotyping, cuz a coworker of mine is going through the same dang ting. it's not stereotyping its da truth, just like we all know Jamaican men dont take care of their kids and they have a bag of baby mamas now dats not stereotyping, c'mon so many ppl could not be wrong, it's not that they want to be like this, it's a learn behaviour because it's their culture and that's the way they were brought up. Cultural believes are very hard to be broken especially if u r religious. every one follows their culture, this is what happens when we date outside of one's norm, this is a normal behaviour for them in their culture, their wives will not complain about this unless they're exposed to an outside culture. bottom line, we just gotta learn from each other and learn to disagree. I am not lucky to be with him, we are both lucky to have each other, and yes they do cheat and lie if u allow them to adn they will never be satisfy with one woman, cuz no man is ever or will ever be so live with it grin, MORE TO COME!!! grin
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by londoner: 10:46am On Oct 21, 2007
Sometimes, its useful to recognise that when  we meet people, good or bad, they are individuals, your Nigerian man is not a romantic, but I know Naija men who are. Both men are Nigerian, but each an individual. You have to ask yourself why you chose to marry a man who is not as romantic as you need him to be, you chose him didn't you?

Focus on the good attributes and they will increase, to the point that what he lacks may become less important. You could actually tell him exactly how you feel, like you have just told us here and your work collegue, because your husband is the one who needs to hear it.  As for the stereotype of Jamaican men, they are many who take care of their children, its just that they get NO PRESS AT ALL.

Yes there are some Nigerian women who wont like to see Nigerian men with women of other nationalities,but its the same if Jamaican men are with White women, Black Americans are with Whites,  Asians or even Hispanics, the women complain about it because they misinterpret it as a personal slight against them. Then of course sometimes the women chosen also misinterpret it as being somehow superior, when in reality they are just more compatible as with that man, as an individual.

Always look at the individual because  you are not marrying the whole of Nigeria, just one of its individuals.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by phatj: 5:03pm On Oct 22, 2007
I believ in 2007 we need to stop the stereotypes it breeds hatred and dividion which leads to racism. I am dating a Nigerian guy and I dont brand shit he does or does not do as "naija like" as he is a person "influenced" by his culture. His culture is just one of the things that define his actions. I see him as a man.I guess the world sees him as a Naija manbetter yet "Omo Yoruba" smiley. Jamiacan men cheat .Naija men cheat . Jamaican men can b romantic and Naija's too. You have to face it there are going to be cultural differences NO DOUBT but dont let it cloud your judgement , when you choose to be with someone you love the person not the culture, Good luck girl with your relationship
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by niajaLkin(f): 1:53am On Oct 26, 2007
My reply to the note below
In my respond to most of the notes left on this site i aggreed that Nigerian men are not romantic and it is true, how can so many people be wrong, now at the end of my note i am sure i mentioned that culture plays a part in peolpe'e action. these are learned behaviour. i'm not on here tryna down talk my husband, i came on here to see if it was just me or there's someone else out there going through the same thing, i just didnt wanna listen to just a few so i did a search an came across this site. I choice to marry him HELL i know that, these sites are not to degrade one's huband or wife it to get feed back, as a Jamaican i even mentioned my own men, they dont like to take care of their own and i know it's not all of them c'mon now, no one will ever find a mate who will match their romantic level from the git go, we learn from each other, but there are some culture that will determine the level of romance one has in their relationship. just as culture plays a big role in many things that a Naija man will or will not do. They are very culturally influenced. Did i mentioned that i thought he wasnt an individual, i know he is but an individual may share many characteristics of other men who are from their country. this is due to the fact that some people are so strongly influence by culture they do not know any better or refuse to break that bond. Every one on God earth is an individual but we all share some Characteristics. When we first met he thought i was just another ignorant Jamaican girl who is materialistic and likes to fight. only to find out that not all Jamaicans are the same, and we did speak about the stereotype of many cultures and countries. he said i changed his views on Jamaicans, Jamaicans are not really culturally influenced, u may have the rastas but rastas are from all different countries, If u were to study different cultures u would realize that culture plays a big role in the lives of their men and women and their different roles. i come on here to learn more about what to do and what not to do and how to understand him. and yes we have discuss all this but he's not the type to discuss certain things. Some times he refuses to hear me cuz i'm a wom, remember he's still fairly new and is a srong believer in culture. In time im sure he will come around. i cant go ask his mom or his uncle or aunt about our sex life that's just a no no!!! so taking the time to do my research is just another way of me getting to know him better. this is y we have the internet right!!! i willl not go by every thing people say but u gotta pick sense out of nonsense right!! And i really dont give a shyt what a Niaja fem wants to say or do i care about race or interracial dating.





Sometimes, its useful to recognise that when we meet people, good or bad, they are individuals, your Nigerian man is not a romantic, but I know Niaja men who are. Both men are Nigerian, but each an individual. You have to ask yourself why you chose to marry a man who is not as romantic as you need him to be, you chose him didn't you?

Focus on the good attributes and they will increase, to the point that what he lacks may become less important. You could actually tell him exactly how you feel, like you have just told us here and your work collegue, because your husband is the one who needs to hear it. As for the stereotype of Jamaican men, they are many who take care of their children, its just that they get NO PRESS AT ALL.

Yes there are some Nigerian women who wont like to see Nigerian men with women of other nationalities,but its the same if Jamaican men are with White women, Black Americans are with Whites, Asians or even Hispanics, the women complain about it because they misinterpret it as a personal slight against them. Then of course sometimes the women chosen also misinterpret it as being somehow superior, when in reality they are just more compatible as with that man, as an individual.

Always look at the individual because you are not marrying the whole of Nigeria, just one of its individuals.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by MsHoneydro: 3:36am On Oct 26, 2007
I'd love to say Nigerian men are just individuals, but I find it a bit naive to disregard how their upbringing and culture might shape them. You'd be hard pressed to find a Nigerian man who doesn't come from a polygamus background (father, grandfather) or wasn't raised in a home in which his father called all the shots. In my experience, Nigerian men love to be in control and love to be worshiped. The women that tend to compliment them are passive and submissive. That said, they are also the best providers I've ever seen. Most women I know who are married to Nigerian men do not worry about bills and are spoiled terribly.

Its not really a black/white issue, its more about making sure you have the personality traits that compliments a Nigerian men.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by nyabinghi(m): 4:55pm On Dec 03, 2007
kpooyaka,

rastaman in peace.

Sista, it ah good if unu seckle down wid a nigerian man. Nigerian men haffi treat a woman good like dem carribean brothers nuh do.
One thing me haffi seh is mek sure unu know about de man dem ca dem gwan tek advantage ah you if unu sound too desperate.
No matter what part of the world a blackman comes from one ah we don't test, Kpooyaka.seen
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by Iyanlax: 7:11pm On Dec 03, 2007
@ Poster, you ask these questions as though 'AFRICANS - Nigerians' are a different entity from Black folks. You are African - remember that. wink

Get to know him for your self and you will find out all the specific questions you want to know about him. Had you asked about his Nigerian culture, now you would be talking. Your asking for peoples general view on things which can only really be specific to him as an individual! smiley
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by cutensexxy(f): 11:08pm On Dec 05, 2007
i see these kind of topics all the time, im a black american female and my fiance is nigerian, every1 has there own opinion but there are some good men in 9ja, i found one, sometimes the communication is difficult but im learning to speak yoruba he teaches me daily, we do stereotype a lot about african men but we shouldnt let one bad apple spoil the country as a whole, its an individual choice, love who you love, you would be surprised to know that a lot of american women love nigerian men, must be in the water grin
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by AOYEGBESANYAHOOCOM(m): 11:30pm On Dec 05, 2007
LMFAO,

NIGERIAN AND JAMAICAN, WHATS THE DIFFERENCE?

ORIGIN IS THE SAME.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by Nobody: 11:47pm On Dec 05, 2007
1. in nigerian no sharing of ur private wit any other guy apart from ur boy
2. No insults on parent
3. Food cookin is neccesary
4. Love is Mandatory
5. divorce is No go area grin grin c'est fene
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by davidif: 3:45am On Dec 06, 2007
I don't think naija sisters are like African American girls who get angry when there men go after girls of different ethnicities, that is unless they live in america and have started adopting there ways. Most naija girl don't care because there are more than enough boys to go around. Also, you have to know the man's heart and attitudes, if he his straight from the motherland then he probably wants you to be an educated proffessional, a wife, or a mother at the same time (especially if he is a yoruba man). He also wants you to be respectful and disciplined and not like a hoodrat disrespecting her husband. ciao bella.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by joshjosh(m): 1:19pm On Jan 09, 2008
i don't know what the Nigerian culture is. Nigeria has various ethnic groups. may be more than 500 i don't know exact figures. how can we all behave like one in a country of more than 140m? for those talking about Nigerian men cheating and telling lies i wonder where they learn that from seeing majority of them where brought up by women in Nigeria.

i was brought up knowing God forbid i did some bad things and told the truth i wont be killed for it. but to tell a lie to my grandma and parents was to hang yourself. we got rewarded for telling truth even though we weren't Christians then.

all Nigerian men tell lies. all Nigerian women are angels. wonderful Nigeria women. a lady wants help some ladies here failed her big time.

++++ there is a very big association in Nigeria for people from the west Indies married to Nigerians. i cant remember the name but i know there is a chapter in Benin and Jamaica.

my best friend here is married to a jamaican lady for 25yrs going. their 23yrs girl married an ibo boy last year too. i know quite a few that have stable relationships but somebody got to forget all those stereotype. we ain't all thieves and liars.

it is Nigeria 1 - Jamaica 0. Jamaica ladies 1 - Nigerian ladies 0.
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by finemocha(f): 11:44pm On May 01, 2008
this topic just solidifies the truth.  Nigerians are morons. CULTURE IS DIFF OH, THAT IS WHAT TEH WEST INDIE BOYS TRIED TO TELL ME TO DATE THEM. OH TEH CULTURE IS THE SAME, YEAH RIGHT. I AHVE A LOT OF JAMAICAN FRIENDS SO I KNOW BETTER.

WHITELEXI SO SHE IS LUCKY BECAUSE SHE IS DATING A NIGERIAN MAN, LOLOLOLOL WHAT NONSENSE
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by StephenP(m): 11:47pm On May 01, 2008
finemocha:

this topic just solidifies the truth. Nigerians are morons
[size=13pt]Aiit then, do yourself and the rest of us, of course, a favor and leave this forum. By the way, you're late. This thread was posted AGES ago.[/size]
Re: Jamaican Female Dating A Nigerian: Advice by LadyT(f): 11:51pm On May 01, 2008
StephenP:

[size=13pt]Aiit then, do yourself and the rest of us, of course, a favor and leave this forum. By the way, you're late. This thread was posted AGES ago.[/size]


Ha and she had the cheek to call other people morons.

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