Long time ago in 2004AD, in the city of London – Bittyend was just a normal naija guy like the thousands of naija kids raised in London. And like every proper naija man raised the naija way, my naija sisters were always the first choice despite their imperfections; and like naija Uncles dey say: “charity begins at home.” Bittyend was just like every other black kid raised in the London slums doing what everyone does; hustling with the yardies and the naija uncles. The life of crime I choose paid off early; I was driving a big car as a teen; wearing designer garms and creps everywhere; blings on the wrist and neck were shinning brighter than the stars; and my pocket was fatter than an obese big pun. My Naija sisters loved me so much, and I used to pick them up like toothpick.

And like my pops used to say: “everyday is for the thief, one day is for the owner” and “monkey go reach market one day, e no go return” – that was how the “owner” had his “one day”, and my “monkey” went to the “market” – but failed to return (bbm sad face). ‘Yawa gas’, and ‘kasala burst’ – I was shifted by the ‘popos’, and charged – but luckily for me, I escaped prison. I was given a suspended sentence. That was when my life changed; all the money and ‘bling bling’ disappeared like David Blaine’s voodoo; all my naija sisters were nowhere to be found; and I had to start afresh.

I’m pissed because all my naija sisters whom spent my money and enjoyed my fast life with me, never stood by me – they all disappeared while I was going through the traumatic periods of my young life. I noticed that the girls from other countries, who I didn’t really care about, were the ones looking after me and praying for me. It was then that it dawned on me that most naija gash are money grabbers and thieves – all they ever do is thieving from men, despite their average looks. I guess that’s the only talent they possess. And subsequently, whilst I was getting my life back in order – I noticed that whenever I try to check a naija chic, the first thing they always seem to ask is: “do you drive?” like driving a car was a prerequisite to going out with naija girls (most are average looking with flat bums by the way).

I had to say ‘F’ these sluts, and I embraced my naija roots; left the roads for good; started checking yanks and girls from other African countries; and also embraced education as the best legacy. Years later, life is looking great for your boy – and everything seems to be falling in place in a legit way, now these naija bytches are flocking around me like I’m a Fulani herdsman, and they’re my cows.

Bittyend of Narnia

The tune below is dedicated to naija girls:

Dr. Dre ft Dogg Pound – Bytches ain’t shyte

RTFLMAOOOO..

Leave it yeah, blud

two twos, nah? Dun noe... deyah deyah..

What an inspirational story.

Brixtonyute: RTFLMAOOOO..

Leave it yeah, blud

two twos, nah? Dun noe... deyah deyah..

Wag1?

Dun noe, G!!

Angel Town, yeah?? I see you, brikky don!!

bennyraz: What an inspirational story.

Safe, fam.

C'est la vie, bro. C'est. La. Vie.

Goldieluks: Were you into a serious relationship with any of these ''Nigerian'' girls ,
or it was just a fling, like you said in your post' you pick them up like toothpick'.

It was kind of like a relationship.

Are you one of those yahoozee girls in London??

Goldieluks:
You reply comes with bags and baggages, maybe you were not a saint in the whole Nigerian
girls scenario afterall.

Am not one of those yahoozee girls. cheers!

If you're not a yahoozee girl, what are you?

Goldieluks:

Are you trying to be mean or something?
or haven't i answered your question,even though i find it offensive in a way??

I'm not trying to be offensive, that's just my opinion about all the Nigerian girls in London - and I'm entitled to that, till someone like you can change it.

Kinda touchin. Buh u shudnt throw d whole crate of eggs away cuz of a rotten one.

there's nothing more 2 say, uncle killz have said it all.

Goldieluks:


As you can see, your personal opinion is of no effect to me.
good luck with your search, and in case of next time,don't allow your past experience overcloud
your present judgement. Everyone has a past too okay.

Hmmm, interesting..

bennyraz: What an inspirational story.

laffssssssssssss.

but sincerely guys, i dnt really like it wen guys diss nigerian girls like ds. no wonder u guys r nw going for old white women, abi?

Haba!!! well sha, a prophet isnt appreciated amongst his kinsmen. so e no dey bother us. fine janded guys dey too n funny enuff, they love our black magic. so we goin work it gud on dem.

sumting bin tell me say u be retired ANINI!
Y u dey complain? Huh ?
Such balls telling the whole world bout your past life !
I like u

;

kemiola89: there's nothing more 2 say, uncle killz have said it all.

**faints**wakes up** did i just hear u say UNCLE KILLZ meen killz must be really feeling on top of d world. Ha ha ha ha..

@Op those ar nt enough reasons 4 u 2 hate on nigerian gurls. . . .nt dat am begging u to change ur opinion buh u gat 2 b realistic sumtyms. . . .we ain't all d same.

bennyraz: **faints**wakes up** did i just hear u say UNCLE KILLZ meen killz must be really feeling on top of d world. Ha ha ha ha..

and what's the big deal calling him uncle, i can as well call u grandpa if you feel like it.lolz

kemiola89: and what's the big deal calling him uncle, i can as well call u grandpa if you feel like it.lolz

are u kinda of humilating KILLZ Well, don't say i didn't warn u o!

Laila Ikeji:

laffssssssssssss.

but sincerely guys, i dnt really like it wen guys diss nigerian girls like ds. no wonder u guys r nw going for old white women, abi?

Haba!!! well sha, a prophet isnt appreciated amongst his kinsmen. so e no dey bother us. fine janded guys dey too n funny enuff, they love our black magic. so we goin work it gud on dem.

good luck , i used to support naija sisters and defend them all the time but they recently taught me a big lesson i will never forget bitty story is comedy compared to what they did to me.they need to change , the good ones among them are not up to 10 percent .

KILLZ what is wrong with you sef?why can't you summarize points,na novel you dey write?

OP eyah chei pele I'm feeling your pain.

Senator chukwunaeriego what are u doing here? Pls we need ur ideology

Killz.:

Just say you are too lazy to read. . . If na naijasexy post, you go read am, and you no go find summary. . .

freecocoa: