we are six in my family, 2boys and 4girls. my elder brother(the first son) and elder sister(the first daughter) can go to hell. i wish they were never my siblings. every success i make is heart-breaking to them. phuck them.

Let me b frank wit u guys, this issue happens in my family, my dad and his kid broda have been at war 4 a long tym whereas, wen dis guy was notin, it was my dad who helpd him up 4rm d scratch 2 were he is now. I'm not surprised at this topic coz it happens n it's still happenin coz am a witness.

slimyem: i've been hearing frequent tales on this issue between siblings and its been making me wonder how it all starts.
I love my siblings to pieces and i'm sure they feel the same way towards me so i can't really magine why anyone would hate theirs so much they do neither see nor talk.
Some even turn their lives into competitions with their brothers/sisters.
A friend once narrated to me how her immediate elder sister treated her while they were staying together and how the sister stylishly threw her out of the house for no real reason asides petty issues.now that she's even married and her elder sister is not,they are sworn enemies!
Two of my aunt (sisters) and at war now-for petty reasons!
One of my friends doesnt know ANYTHING about his brother and they dont ever call each other for no reason!
Why oh why!

these are signs that we're getting closer to the end of time. someone i know very well is even trying to kill his brother just because of his brother's own hard-earned money which he doesn't have. the worst part of it is that he enjoys every bit of that wealth. others that aren't even related to him benefit as well but this young man wants everything to himself. #Greed

Ive noticed that if its a boy and a girl they tend to be closer?

This is no doubt a very serious issue that occur in our families daily,it has to do with bad parenting,envy,greed and selfishness.
My immediate younger brother whom I paid his school fees,bought his clothes and give money selfishly decided to spoil my name along with my mother for no reason.
They said all damaging things about me but whenever I see them I pretended as if I didn't hear anything just to make sure I avoid arguing with them,am a very simple and intelligent person and that's my secret in dealing with people.
My mum even went as far as telling my siblings to dislike me and like my immediate younger brother telling them that I will not help them in times of need,she invested in my other siblings but did nothing for me.
I paid my school fees through Secondary School and the University,now my immediate younger brother is still struggling and my mother have lost faith in him.
she come to me to report my brother's behavior and unserious attitude but I always asked her to be patient with him as he will change,my was surprised that despite every I still love them all and offer assistance whenever they are need.
I think parents are the main culprits in this issue,though most people naturally hate crowd as a result tend to stay away from people including their loved ones and only visit them occasionally.

WHEN JESUS IN THE FAMILY; HAPPY HAPPY HOME.

K

991: we are six in my family, 2boys and 4girls. my elder brother(the first son) and elder sister(the first daughter) can go to hell. i wish they were never my siblings. every success i make is heart-breaking to them. phuck them.

Woow why now?

I would never forget the day my brother cried bitterly when i was still job hunting.He later paid my tuition fees to study in the UK for my masters,how do you fall apart with that kind of a brother?. He is the rock of the family,even when i'm the first child.At times i ask myself why he's not the first child.The answer is this some siblings are destined to be great than others irrespective of their position in the family,LOVE is key.What i feel can strain the relationship between my brother and i can actually be when he decides to have a family of his own,but i've made a vow in my heart that i would love his wife and his children to death.I will always carry them along in my plans till i depart this world.Even if i'm wretched(Allah forbid) i would shower them with unlimited love,affection,and care.@ OP I think lack of understanding is the main reason.

my brother can talk to girls on phone for hours and its over a month he called me last.

^males take note.

@ topic


others have said it all.

the african mentality na wa.

lord have mercy.

lepasharon: Ive noticed that if its a boy and a girl they tend to be closer?

This is NOT true. I am the oldest boy and my younger sister (the oldest girl) and I are not close. She thinks we are mates because there is only one year and a few months between us and that I am our parents' favorite. To be honest, I am only the favorite because in addition to being the oldest son, I am nice, generous, jovial and very openly loving towards them. My sister is quiet, loves to keep malice and is very stingy. I am the type of guy that can give all my life savings to my parents if they need it but my sister is the type of person who can't buy $10 pant for my Mum without agonizing (of course, like all stingy people, she loves receiving expensive gifts). We just have very different natures and it's too bad that her nature is not the most lovable one.

To be honest, I am tired of her already. I want to love her but it's just so damn hard to love this girl, especially when she won't respect me as her older brother. Thank God that we are both pretty successful. I don't need her and she doesn't need me. These days, I pretty much just leave her alone. The only thing I am waiting for is for her to find a husband so I can stop feeling responsible for her. I am just tired of faking closeness because of blood ties. I wouldn't even be talking to her at all if not for the love and devotion I have for my parents. It's the sad but true reality and at this point, only God can intervene to reverse the situation.

This happens for lots of reasons and its mainly envy. The sibings who are not successfull would blame the successful one for their plight/ They may also feel that he is not sharing the booty of his wealth with them. Some people are plain wicked that even when the successful one shares with them they would still hate him/her. Remember ths story of Joseph in the Bible. Such thing happens and it beats my imagination.

.

In most cases, it is caused by greed and jealousy which are both nourished by lies and anger

Very true. Siblings could be jealous of each other because one is smarter than the other, one has a better job than the other. The rivalry for being labelled a better child than your siblings

Edu Colombo :
This is one issue that still bothers me till today. Would hear my dad talk about how they enjoyed their days with his siblings, but now, its civil war between them. But that has not stopped me from relating with my cousins well. Am the first in a family of 4 correct guys nd a luvly gal. Just hope it wouldn't happen in our own time. I love my wonderful siblings!

This has been bothering me too, my dad and his siblings don't see eye to eye. But, I relate so very well with my cousins cos I don't want what ever dissagreement they might have had to affect my relationships with them.

Well i also think dat it's a personal decision dat no matter what happens u'll love u sibblings&tolerate some of their annoying character.i ve one sis who so annoying.althought she is my junior she tries bullying me till one day i pounded her like yam,so dat one stopped.my mum always tells me dat elders shd b patient&endure whn it comes 2 d younger ones.
so i made a personal decision to love my sis no matter hw annoying she might b&she knows.she does not joke wit me.she can do anythg 4 me cost she knows dat i can take a bullet 4 her anytime of d day.

Am in a family of six, five wonderful guys and a girl.
My love for them can't be easily broken by any misunderstanding
and I know it's reciprocal. I thank God for their spouses,
they have not come between us.
I can't imagine breaking the bond that is holding us tight.
I pray for peace to reign in the family of those who are experiencing hatred among their siblings,
in Jesus name, amen.

lepasharon:


Woow why now?

my dear i don't know where the hatred came from, when they were told i bought a car, they almost died of sadness, the elder sister particularly, she said 'car is nothing to her, she can buy car today today if she wants' now tell me, is that how to congratulate a younger bros for his success? when she was told i got married, the elder sister said 'its a lie maybe i have impregnated a girl, but they told her i did all the traditional requirements and my wife was not prgnant then, she was very sad, until now she never even for once called to say hi neither to me nor my wife. i dont have her number and i don't need it either. she lives in the UK anyway but phuck her and phuk her UK.

lepasharon:


Woow why now?

As for my elder bros, that one his sense dey come and go like Etisalat network, he loves his friend and outsiders more than any of us his siblings, though he claims he loves us, but he only shows the love to his immediate younger sister(the first daughter) when i see his friends, they will tell me he called them last night but this mad man never called me since january, he also lives abroad but phuck him and his abroad.
am better off with my younger siblings and the love i share with them is incomparable. as a matter of fact my immediate younger sister lives with me, others live with my parents but i visit them regularly.

I will attribute strives between sibings to the following:

1. Bad Parenting / poor parenting: Bad parenting in the sense that bad tree cannot bring good fruits. What dwells in the parent. I noticed something about the children I gave birth to, they are very agressive even at their very very tender age, like 2-4months old. This signaled to me that they're taking after me in that direction and even in some other ways.
Poor parenting in the sense that many parents are not even updating themselves to nurture and monitor the children, careless speeches, showing preference, etc. Foundation matters in everything. Parent is the foundation of every children. Some of these siblings just love to create problems because of their foolishness. They have these tendencies right from onset but because their parents never bothered to check these excesses, they have become a big menace to the other ones.

2. Difference in upbringing environment: This may be a very important cause if one lives in a better environment than others, that may cause anything in the future if the rest do not have good understanding.

3. Spiritual/Demonic Attacks: This is an important thing we should not overlook. You see the elder ones just being angry with their younger and prosperous ones for flimsy reasons. If the elder ones would not check his/herself properly, the devil will soon use them for the downfall of the younger ones if the younger one is not strong spiritually

Very interesting topic!! I'm experiencing the same thg with my 3 siblings and i still can't figure out what exactly led to this. Maybe the age gap which is 12yrs and 10yrs. My immediate senior is the most difficult person to live with and it's only 2yrs difference. I've gone thru many contributions and i don't think ours is due to envy or jealousy or one being well treated by our parents than the other.

Ours is majorly RESPECT!! the elder ones crave it and aren't ready to give the younger ones. In this age and time, who'd take such nonsense?? when u're neither feeding nor clothing me??

I think parents are to blame, when you plant seeds of envy when bringing your child up. Constantly comparing them with each other or with other people, what do you expect. I love my family to bits and everyone is happy with each others successes and supportive of each other, my younger brother could call me in the middle of working hours to run an errand for him and i would and vice versa, that's the way a family should be!

ibrahim007: I would never forget the day my brother cried bitterly when i was still job hunting.He later paid my tuition fees to study in the UK for my masters,how do you fall apart with that kind of a brother?. He is the rock of the family,even when i'm the first child.At times i ask myself why he's not the first child.The answer is this some siblings are destined to be great than others irrespective of their position in the family,LOVE is key.What i feel can strain the relationship between my brother and i can actually be when he decides to have a family of his own,but i've made a vow in my heart that i would love his wife and his children to death.I will always carry them along in my plans till i depart this world.Even if i'm wretched(Allah forbid) i would shower them with unlimited love,affection,and care.@ OP I think lack of understanding is the main reason.

u av said it all, UNDRESTANDING ,TRUE LOVE AND PATEINT

Amaka G29:
Siblings are two separate human beings with different tastes, preferences, and personalities. If the personalities and preferences conflict, then they may not get along well. As children, they will be forced to live together relatively peacefully because of parental supervision. As adults, they will be freer to express their dislike and to avoid each other or fight.

I love my siblings dearly and as children we fought over things all the time, but not over personalities. Scarcity in resources often produces violence and hostility whether the resource is love, attention, money, or property. Other family members may prove to be good mediators, but counseling may also be in order.

Amaka, this is brilliant! This is the crux of the matter.

Hmm na wa o,hope this gap between siblings doesn't come with age o cos it seems most of the people hating or hated by their siblings are either married or in serious relationships.

freecocoa: Hmm na wa o,hope this gap between siblings doesn't come with age o cos it seems most of the people hating or hated by their siblings are either married or in serious relationships.

Marriage is not always the cause of sibling rivalry and hatred. It is often just another turf to fight the 'battle'.

My immediate younger brother (same mother, different dad) has just suddenly picked up a needless hatred for me...i guess its because I am moving far ahead and he seems to think my mum favours me more than she favours him. I have expolred every sensible way to win him back because we were once best of friends but he seems too pompous and arrogant. His dad is very rich and he feels I dont deserve a place in their family. I thank God for my position though but I hope he grows up to realise nothing is worth blood love...I think he is still very immature but I am patient and will wait for him to grow and embrace real life.

Amaka G29:
Siblings are two separate human beings with different tastes, preferences, and personalities. If the personalities and preferences conflict, then they may not get along well. As children, they will be forced to live together relatively peacefully because of parental supervision. As adults, they will be freer to express their dislike and to avoid each other or fight.

Amaka you said it all, i think this is the case with my elder siblings, we are absolutely separate human beings with different lives.

nwani oma: I think parents are to blame, when you plant seeds of envy when bringing your child up. Constantly comparing them with each other or with other people, what do you expect. I love my family to bits and everyone is happy with each others successes and supportive of each other, my younger brother could call me in the middle of working hours to run an errand for him and i would and vice versa, that's the way a family should be!

I agree with Nwani. It all begin with parents giving preferential treatment to one child and neglecting the other. They grow up in life thinking all the childhood issues are all forgotten but the truth is, it is never so. The child that got preferential treatment will always think he is better, can never be wrong and so on.

Parents beware o.

Then we are all our of this human nature. We have the tendency to always be jealous or envious of other people's success. one other major issue is MONEY......Then MARRIAGE, siblings need to know their limits in each others marriage and the truth is at some points for most families, you all have your lives to live. Don't break your siblings marriage in the name of "na my brother or sister house, who you be"