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Omo, no be small thing ![]() E shock me say ChatGPT fit get badmouth like this: This was the prompt: Please roast the following Nigerian artists in a funny but ultimately factual and critical manner. 1. David 2. Wizkid 3. Burna Boy 4. Awake 5. Zinoleesky 6. CKay 7. Ayra Starr 8. Don Jazzy 9. Tyla 10. Fireboy DML 11. Rema 12. Tiwa Savage 13. Kiss Daniels 14. BNXN 15. Portable And the response weak me ![]() Edit: I know Tyla is not Nigeria. I just wanted to add her. ***************** Ah, you want me to channel my inner music critic and unleash some rhythmic roasts on Nigeria's finest? Consider me your sardonic sommelier of sonic scrutiny. Let's serve these artistes some spicy but ultimately nutritious criticism, shall we? **1. Davido (I assume you meant him, not "David" ** The crown prince of "eh eh eh" ad-libs who bought his way to the top and still can't buy a consistent vocal note. His music strategy? Yell "30 BILLION FOR THE ACCOUNT" while his Auto-Tune engineer weeps in the corner. His international collaborations are like his engagement history—numerous attempts with questionable commitment to the finish line. **2. Wizkid** Ah, Starboy—Nigeria's self-proclaimed "biggest bird" who soared high with "Essence" then promptly forgot how to fly. From "Ojuelegba" to "More Love, Less Ego," the ego somehow expanded inversely with the quality. Now delivers albums at the pace of continental drift and treats concerts like optional calendar events. His fans call him "Big Wiz" while the rest of us wonder if he's just big on his wizzing past glory. **3. Burna Boy** The "African Giant" with an ego that could eclipse the continent itself. Calls himself the heir to Fela while simultaneously diluting Afrobeat into palatable TikTok snippets for global consumption. Grammy-winning and yet somehow still introduces himself as if we don't know who he is in every single track. The only artist whose attitude is more explosive than his talent—and that's saying something. **4. Asake** (I believe you meant him, not "Awake" The man who discovered you can make an entire career by saying "Ololade mi Asake" and "hmmmm" over amapiano beats. His lyrical diversity ranges from "mo gbe body e" to "mo gbe body e" again. Creates twelve variations of the same song and calls it an album. His fashion sense is what would happen if a prayer cloth manufacturer had a psychedelic breakdown. **5. Zinoleesky** Marlian Music's surviving success story—emphasis on "surviving." Makes the same song about cash, women, and how his "shey you remember" catchphrase constitutes actual songwriting. Has spent his entire career trying to convince us that nasal delivery is a deliberate artistic choice rather than a chronic sinus condition. **6. CKay** The "Love Nwantiti" one-hit global explosion who's still wondering how to recreate the magic. Creates "emo-Afrobeats" that sounds like someone crying in autotune over a dembow rhythm. His music is the sonic equivalent of that teenage diary you hope no one ever finds—painfully sincere, embarrassingly dramatic, and occasionally catchy despite itself. **7. Ayra Starr** Mavin's Gen-Z answer to actual vocal talent. Perpetually dressed like she's late for both an early 2000s video shoot and a high school rebellion. Her entire personality is "I'm 19," even as the years keep passing. Her songs all start ambitious then devolve into "body-body-body-body" repetitions when the lyrical well runs dry approximately 47 seconds in. **8. Don Jazzy** Nigeria's music industry godfather who now spends more time making TikTok skits than actual music. Created Mavin Records as a sophisticated scheme to avoid having to sing himself. Has mastered the art of turning mediocre talents into superstars through sheer marketing force and his signature "It's Don Jazzy Again" producer tag that appears more consistently than his artists' quality. **9. Tyla** The South African singer Nigeria has somehow claimed by continental proximity. Rode "Water" to global fame and is now swimming frantically not to drown in one-hit wonder territory. Her dance moves get more streams than her music, which says everything you need to know about her artistic priorities. **10. Fireboy DML** YBNL's "Peru" hitmaker whose international breakthrough came courtesy of Ed Sheeran—the musical equivalent of having your parent sign your permission slip. Started as "alternative Afrobeats" until he discovered commercial success and promptly abandoned all the alternative bits. Now makes music that's about as edgy as a perfectly spherical ball. **11. Rema** The Benin City wunderkind whose music career peaked suspiciously close to his discovery. Has been "raving and raging" while making increasingly sanitized pop designed for algorithm dominance. Claimed "Calm Down" was his biggest hit, then proceeded to never calm down about it for two straight years. Duets with Selena Gomez but still can't outgrow his teenybopper image. **12. Tiwa Savage** Nigeria's self-declared "number one African bad girl" who's been singing about the same relationship for approximately 15 years. Has reinvented herself more times than her passport has stamps, yet somehow always lands back on "men ain't shit but I want them anyway" as her core message. Her vocal range is impressive; her thematic range, however, fits on a sticky note. **13. Kizz Daniel** (not "Kiss" The perpetual perfectionist whose obsession with "no bad songs" has ironically led to some truly forgettable ones. Creates music with all the unpredictability of a metronome—technically perfect and utterly devoid of surprise. Has spent a decade making variations of "Woju" while calling it artistic growth. **14. BNXN (formerly Buju)** Changed his name to something unpronounceable and expected us all to adapt without complaint. Makes hooks for other artists that outshine his own complete songs—a musical mercenary who saves his worst work for himself. Has collaborated with everyone in the industry as if trying to collect Afrobeats artists like Pokémon. **15. Portable** The walking, talking embodiment of "chaotic evil" energy in Nigerian music. Less an artist and more a human tornado who occasionally makes sounds over beats. Has had more controversies than hit songs and considers both equally valuable to his brand. Proof that in the streaming age, you don't need talent—just an absolute refusal to be ignored and an inexhaustible supply of outlandish behavior. There you have it—fifteen artists thoroughly roasted but still somehow respecting the actual talents that brought them to prominence. The Nigerian music industry: where the egos are as big as the beats, and the drama is often more entertaining than the songs themselves! |
TenQ:All what you wrote is garbage and not worth considering in the first place. How do I know this? Because there are two applicable facts that I'm aware of. Namely: 1. There is an entire branch of mathematics that deals with the behaviour of spaces with different numbers of dimensions. That branch of mathematics is called tensor analysis, and if you have not studied it, you have nothing to offer here. 2. Physicists have been applying tensor analysis (more correctly, the advanced variant known as the Ricci Calculus) to matters including the development of cosmological models. So with respect to the foregoing points, unless you've spent a significant period of time participating in that research, no one here is obliged to take this thing serious. |
Bishopkingsley:I suppose if its lights out and game over when ionic currents stop flowing across our brain neurons , them we'll never know. If any of us sim characters do ever get reanimated whereby we can know God's computational powers, then me might realize ourselves to be simulated beings by God. |
Bishopkingsley:Hello Bishopkingsley Pig brains have been kept alive for over 36 hours after the death of the pig's bodies. What if human brains could also be kept alive after the death of the bodies from where they were embodied? What if disembodied minds could be interfaced with power computers connecting disembodied minds to virtual reality worlds? Then who is to say each of us aren't one of these disembodied minds interfaced with a powerful computer by a controller simulating our realities, this being God. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFXiYUsAyYA I concur with Nick Bostrom's reasoning why we are very likely living in a simulated reality. Bostrom argues that at least ONE of the following propositions must be true: (1) The human species is very likely to go extinct before reaching a “posthuman” stage. (2) Any posthuman civilization is extremely unlikely to run a significant number of simulations of their evolutionary history (or variations thereof). (3) We are almost certainly living in a computer simulation. Since there is a significant chance that a future generation of technologically advanced post-humans will run ancestor-simulations by powerful computers, then we are almost certainly living in a computer simulation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmVOV7xvl58 Indications we might be living in a simulated reality: 1. A particle passing through a double-slit behaves as a wave causing an interference pattern when unobserved, but this same particle doesn't create an interference pattern when its path of travel can be determined by an observer. This collapse of the wave-function could be happening in order to save computational resources necessary for our simulated reality. 2. This mark of intelligence left in our genetic coding might be indicative of an intelligent designer, who may be responsible for the simulation of our reality. Our genetic code's creator has left this mathematical pattern in our genetic code conveying to me the symbol of an Egyptian triangle as well as the number 37 embedded in our genetic code. Eight of the canonical amino acids can be sufficiently defined by the composition of their codon's first and second base nucleotides. The nucleon sum of these amino acids' side chains is 333 (=37 * 3 squared), the sun of their block nucleons (basic core structure) is 592 (=37 * 4 squared), and the sum of their total nucleons is 925 (=37 * 5 squared ). With 37 factored out, this results in 3 squared + 4 squared + 5 squared, which is representative of an Egyptian triangle. I would not expect there to be a mathematical depiction of an Egyptian triangle stored within genetic coding if it were a naturally occurring phenomenon. The mathematical pattern of the number 37 being used as a key factor for conveying an Egyptian triangle might related to the gematria value of 37 appearing in the Hebrew language of Genesis 1:1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7eLTcReVtU 3. Theoretical physicist Dr. S. James Gates Jr. claims that a certain string theory, super-symmetrical equations describing the nature and reality of our universe, contains embedded computer codes; these codes have digital data in the form of 0's and 1's identical to what makes web browsers function, and they're error-correct codes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bp4NkItgf0E In conclusion, with the wave-function collapsing in order to conserve computational power of a simulator device, a semantic message in genetic coding, and the computer coding found buried deep within the mathematical equations of super symmetry., seems to me like we are living in a simulation. |
JustMe77:Welcome True Believer ![]() As for Marvel's comics, I honestly feel their new comic content isn't as exciting as their older comics in my opinion. I could recommend some sick Marvel comic stories from the Silver Age if you like. |
pu7pl3:i have been summoned here. Hope i'm safe ![]() |
F0REVERB0SS:i don't see it bro. Not even if I squint. We'll need to see more to know for certain and I think we're still very far away from seeing teasers and BTS footage for Moon Knight. |
Oladimeji247:Who is he playing? |
webhead:the embargo lifted today I think. The reviews are looking awesome so far ![]() |
Kaycee7:Not another DC fanboy thinking an honest criticism of any DC film is a "troll" . Oh well...Merry Christmas to the distinguished competition ![]() |
webhead:Is it out yet? Not really conversant with the DC calendar |
Merry Christmas to the Nairaland marvelites ![]() |
This year has been a rollercoaster indeed. RIP to Chadwick Boseman |
Sabr1na:how long has this game even been in development? it seems like it was conceived in 2012 or 2014, which explains the look of the characters (so many of them look like they are from a movie tie in game from the first two phases of the MCU),... and the massive role the Inhumans and the Tarragin Mists play in the game (remember when Marvel was trying to replace mutants with Inhumans because they didn't have the movie rights to the X-Men?). This game's story feels so dated already. It feels too much like early MCU. It feels very uninspired. Compare that with the last Spiderman game, which took a bunch of influences from comics, cartoons, and the movies, and put enough of their own spin on them to make them feel fresh and current. The Avengers game, however, just feels like a cheap tie in game with a coat of Destiny paint slapped onto it. |
Just a kid from Queens
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F0REVERB0SS:End Game was a perfect jumping off point for people. Black widow would've been a nice hold-over until the balance of the build-up follows. However, box office momentum has been essentially lost. Now that they've had essentially had about 6 months with no production, and the "free time" to analyze the fox properties, I wonder how the game plan will change. Will it shift to the established characters more? Or will they need something big to hook people back in? If that's the case F4 and/or X-men could see a bump in priority. Also does anyone know what was actually shooting when the world stopped turning? Black Widow was done obviously, Eternals should also be essentially done. It was originally in the Nov slot, right? Did Dr. Strange, Thor, or Shang Chi start production? |
Sabr1na:i'm eXcited for the Eternals and really curious about Shang-Chi. But none of these announced films eXcite me more than Avengers 5 and the reboot of the Mutants and the Fantastic Four. |
MJBOLT:lol. come on Bro. Marvel main team is easily outclassed by DC. Thor, Iron Man (only if he has his absolute strongest suit), Hulk and Captain Marvel are the factor for Marvel here. Superman, Wonderwoman, Flash, MMH and Hal are the factors for DC. WW/Flash/MMH could probably solo that group and all together it is overkill. DC just has a stronger main team than Marvel. Its not a big deal. Scarlett Witch is overhyped and has like 1 high tier reality warping feat. She's not gonna use that level of power on a random encounter. |
100naira:LOL. Indeed the similarities between The Snap and the COVID-19 casualties are surplus ![]() |
Darkprime:i don’t think we need all of phase 4 but maybe 1 or 2 movies would be good. Black Widows movie does make sense. Shang-Chi could of worked easily. Could do Hawkeyes transformation in either movie. |
pu7pl3:
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Shittaakeem:Easily one of Marvel’s best casting decisions ever. |
Cottonmouth:$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ |
pu7pl3:actually, I said that you had no knowledge of how Hollywood works. The latter half of your second sentence is further proof of the claim. it's hilarious how you accuse other people of running away when you haven't countered one argument. I think the cordials are messing with your head, my guy. Be safe, bro. |
HbJ2:i didn't know this but it makes this whole debate that much funnier. Lol @1000waystolive, You definitely nailed it, it seems Cavill gets more leading roles because he looks like he was carved out of marble ![]() |
pu7pl3:It’s obvious from this statement that you don’t know how Hollywood works. If Cox is as talented as y'all claim he would have been a bigger deal than he is now..it's simpleSee above. It takes more than just talent to become famous or star in blockbusters. All of you here backing Cox as a better actor are just talking about his role in Daredevil..Because 1) he’s very good in it; 2) that’s his most well-known project; and 3) this is a superhero thread. that's his highest point/level, that's where his range stops..Cavill on the other hand has alot of range Comedy, Action, thrillers andwe have seen him helpless, we have seen him as a spy, we have seen him handle swords etc and he looks to just be getting startedUh huh. Right. Because Cox never got the opportunity to demonstrate range on DD. He was never funny or charming or scared or enraged or sad or helpless or anything but...whatever you think he was. Tone down on your nonsense please. Attached gif: sO mUCh RaNGe https://66.media.tumblr.com/834c75916f944588ff13a74d3e6ab065/tumblr_nnfcf6wSDb1rzrnw5o2_500.gif |
Lala39:That's sometimes true but in the Cox/Cavill debate I don't think that's a factor. Cavill's Superman had the presence of a cinder block. |
Lol. show me an example of "dishing it out but not taking it" ![]() pu7pl3: pu7pl3: dragonflyy: pu7pl3: |
pu7pl3:your argument is nonsensical. You’re essentially saying that quantity is greater than quality when it comes to measuring or evaluating talent and that is a ridiculous argument. You can believe Cavill is a better actor than Cox until you’re blue in the face; that’s your right. But measuring talent the way you are (“They’re the same age and one guy was in a bunch of blockbusters that were met with a lukewarm reception at best and the other was the headliner of a Netflix series!”) is one of the most ludicrous things I’ve seen on this forum all year. |
so I was thinking. If disney+ was a thing sooner, how it would have changed the MCU. A great option would be the Hawkeye series taking effect during the snap. So we get to see how the Earth is handling missing half it’s population and Clint darks transformation from Hawkeye to Ronin. It could have been good ![]() |
HbJ2:I think I prefer Superman actors to look a little more buff. Charlie Cox is a bit on the lean side for what I expect from seeing someone wearing the shield of Superman. Here's a funny thing to note; Henry Cavill's character bullied him in Stardust. Wouldn't it be funny to see one Superman bullied by another if that casting choice ever happened? |

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