₦airaland Forum

This POSTER is a JOKER! For real. Imagine him taking advantage of his friend's sister and then coming here to bother people with a COCK and BULL story about how it is HAPPENING LIVE AND NOW TO SOMEONE. Oh boy u better clean up ur act and go and apologise to ur friend, his sister and the entire family. If u ain't guilty why are u scared?

Never mind answering cos we all know that ''THE GUILTY ARE ALWAYS AFRAID''!

It's high time Nigerians learnt not to depend solely on single individuals. It's true that Mikel is good but he is definitely not indispensable. We tend to see him the way we do because he was discovered, but do we know that a lot of people are out there who are better than Mikel 200% but we don't know them because they are yet to be discovered? Siasia should carry on joo

Femo2000 i beg u my brother what are the requirements for one to get admitted into this prestigious institution full of guaranteed sweet life and how long does it take to study ADVANCED MILITANCY?

Kamsik if that shirt is free that's lovely. Tell us how to come get them but if not, pls take it somewhere else. I support Obama but i ain't spending a dime because of him.  

Took a peek, hurriedly read the thread, didn't know what to do, decided to quietly relocate to the toilet and weep for his dear country Nigeria

BABA GOD SAVE YOUR CHILDREN IN NAIJA

OGBORUANI!!! IGBEMEDU!!! KWARANZURUNGI!!!

Kayemjay u no get respect at all, wetin u talk? That u r older than me nairaland wise? U wey be JJC? U don forget say ur profile dey there? U wey just come? U think say na by number of posts?

I demand an apology right now! and if u dont take time a fine will follow, Shuooooo

I suggest u check ur profile and check mine. AIKIN BANZA!!!

Ehen, Kayemjay u been say Clem dey shit, how far wit am now? Na intestine him dey shit? abeg when him shit finish let me know u hear?

Kayemjay i must say that u r a very funny character and a mischivious one at that. I was yabbing u and u changed it in such a away that it looks like it was Ituen and Seun i was yabbing. I must commend u that was a nice one.

Kayemjay, walahi kai wani baban SAUNA ne! Babu wawa irin ka a duniya. Mainene kake nema a wannan lagwanin?
Waye ya giya maka cewa an bude ita domin wawaye kaman kune? Shege dan banza! An hana ka jin Hausa ne? dan iska kawai!

Yauwa yanuwana daga Arewa,
Bayan matukan gaisuwa da fatan kunanan lafiya?
Nine Beemex, daga Arewa nike, domin haka ina kira ga yanuwana daga Arewa duk mu taru domin mu gane juna. I dan kai dan Arewa ne dan Allah ka sa hanu a wannan lagwani.

Sorry o my fellow nairalanders, this is just calling on all those who are from the north, were born in the north, have been in the north or can speak Hausa language to please represent here on this thread. Pls no segragation intended and apologies to those who dont understand hausa language, this is not meant to keep u away from here u r still part everything and whatever u dont understand will be translated so, let us all have fun in the AREWA and HAUSA Stylee!!

Am calling on people like AYUSMAN and CLEMCYKUL to pls come on board and kick this thread off.

And come o, Clemcykul which one wey u be sef, na woman abi na man?

Jaymobb, how i dey my broza? Kai bahause ne? me i am looking por my brozas prom the north here on nairaland are u one op my brozaz?

Clemcykul walahi i like am por the way u i dey do por this nairaland fa. U i dey lap por ebery joke weda i don see am bepore abi i no see am. Walahi me i wan make i be like u, prom today i go lap por ebery joke i see weda i don see am bepore or i neba see am. Walahi me i dey peel u well well.

Clemcykul, this one wey be say all the time you are LYAO (LMAO) are u sure u still have ur ass intact? Because i imagine that ur ass would have been breaking off bit by bit. Abeg take am easy with dat LMAO u hear?

Hey guys! we are tired of all these stale jokes on nairaland, if u don't have anything new and funny, spare us the stress of trying to read ur jokes. why don't u just relax and enjoy other people's joke? Nothing says that u must post a joke, u could go to properties, politics and post whatever there Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

This a complet CTRL C, CTRL V and very stale for that matter. Can't believe some people are still LTAO with this one.

I honestly can believe that there are people still laughing to stale jokes like this! Where have u guys been all these years? I first heard this joke when i was in SS2 which was in 1993. NA WA O!!!

People, Una Sure Say This Abasifo guy well so? The guy seems crazy to me.

Took a peep at the thread, realised it was launched by a mentally retarded person and took to my heels

Hey guys, in as much as we are here to catch some fun i'd rather we mind the type of jokes we post lest we commit an unforgiven sin. Remember, ''GOD IS NOT MOCKED'' pls let us thread softly and cautiously i beg of u all. HAVE FUN

Clemcykul wetin de happen? I say make i hala u and Ayusman being ma brazas in hausawa kingdom.

Yaya zurgazurga, yaya kai da kawowa, yaya cin matan mutane?

Whassup coolykdat! Don't u be feeling believing that u r the king of ur mama's jokes alright? All what u dished out are not original just like the ones am gonna dish out to u right now

1, Yo momma's glasses are so thick that when she looks into a map she sees people waving

2, Yo momma is so ugly that when she was born, nurses took her to a zoo in Angola insearch or her biological parents

3, Yo momma is so dumb that when she farts, she tries to find the colour

4, Yo momma is so ugly that when she looks into a mirror she shivers and is like 'Wow what the heck is this?'

5, Yo momma is so old that in her days, the rainbow come out in black and white

6, Yo momma is so old that she waited table during the last supper

7, Yo momma is so old that she was mate with Jesus Christ in kindergarten

8, Yo momma is so fat that whenever she weighs herself the scale reads 'To be continued'

9, Yo momma is so dark that in a room with 3000watts halogen lamp you see only her eyes and teeth

10, Yo momma is so stupid she thinks hot dog is dog meat pepper soup

I have nothing more to say to u but if u still feel u r the king, then do ur research and bring it on! I know u r going to do it cos u r as dumb, stupid and empty headed as a sheep from Kano

No hard feelings man u know how it is on Nairaland cheers

Guys, just let that guy continue being a DISGRACE.

But DISGRACE come o, does it mean that u took time to think up what to post and this was what u came up with? Are u that empty? What do u have for a brain? Do u think through the ASS? Do u even think at all? Do u understand what this thread is all about? Are u psychologically depressed? Tell me something, Do u hear voices in ur head? Do u see people trying to kill u, or do u harm?

Sorry for the barrage of questions, just want to ascertain ur mental status to see if u r psychotic or neurotic. Do sleep for four days and tell me the effect it has on u ok? NONSENSE!!!!

This disgrace guy is really a character! imagine that i was thinking it was a chat room for real. O boy take ur time with that kind post o wetin dey worry u sef?

During the February 2000 Sharia crisis in Kaduna, a group of angry Kataf youths double crossed some hausa men in a bus and were about to unleash mayhem on them when one person from the back of the bus shouted that they were Christians. The leader of the youths wanting them to prove that they were Christians said:

'If you are christians like u claim, then answer me this, 'PRAISE THE LORD!!!' He shouted.

And all the passengers in the bus triumphantly chorused, 'HAPPY CHRISTMAS!!!'.





On another street during the same period, another man was waylaid by some angry youths who were about to lynch him to death but he kept protesting that he was a christian and when asked what his name was, he emphatically answered, 'ESTHER!!!'

Superstar1 you really sound like someone that has a vast knowledge of our banking industry. However i've been searching for job for about 3years now and bank job won't be a bad idea for me because i did my service with Wema Bank believing that we were going to be retained after service, which was the initial arrangement but one week to the end of our NYSC, the MD and Head of HR, who originaly had that plan for us were replaced. Ever since it's been from one place to the other in search of job. Please, i want to know if u are in a position to help a brother secure one of these bank jobs so that he can take care of responsibilities. I really am desperate Superstar, please help me if u can this is my number 08032902325 and my e-mail is emecca213@yahoo.co.uk.
One thing though, i am an HND holder of Electrical/Electronics Engineering, Electronics/Telecommunications option.
PLEASE HELP ME OUT. Thanks in anticipation.

ima1, no hard feelings and i do apologise for my earlier statement it's just that i feel we should not be talking ill of our one and only country no matter what she dishes to us on a daily basis. I think we should all just think of how best to help in righting the wrongs and ill that abound in Nigeria. Sorry Sis, like i said, NO HARD FEELINGS.

Nuzo or whatever u call urself, if u are a Chinese, i forgive u for ur stupid statements about Nigeria and by the way, WHAT ARE U DOING ON THIS FORUM? Didn't u get the name? NAIRALAND! not YUANLAND! But if u r a Nigerian, then u r the biggest MUFU i've ever come across and the most foolish and God will punish for ur statements. And for ur info, when Nigeria becomes a better place, there won't be space for trash like u. NONSENSE!!!!

Iluqunboy it's people like u and blackcat that i love to meet thumbs up for u guys, much love, i dey feel una die.

LONG LIVE NAIJA JOOOOOOOO!!!!!

ima1 if ur mom was asked to stay for life what else does she want, isn't that good enough for her? And u have the guts to call Nigeria, Naija a stupid country? How dare U? Do me a favour, if u are here in Nigeria, u better find another country and run to immediately, i would suggest Zimbabwe, Niger, Sudan, Iraq, Iran or Afghanistan where u will be treated the way u deserve u and ur black American mother, NONSENSE! make i catch u first tssssssstststststst

Blackcat i dey feel u die!!! Your are my kind of lady and i am right behind you. Anybody wey talk rubbish give u eh, just hala i go hear u anywhere wey i dey. Stupid people no mind them joo!