₦airaland Forum

Editor’s note:
This a question from a whatsapp member. What are your thoughts,how would you advice her? Drop your comments below.
Good evening ma
Please I need help, people are saying I’m too clingy to my boyfriend. I don’t know how to stop it, he works close to the place I worship and I go there twice a week for church activities and use that opportunity to stop by and see how he is doing.

How do I stop going to his office the days I go to the church….I really love seeing him and he loves seeing me too.

I don’t want to be too clingy, almost every one is talking about it in the church, they’re saying I’m all over him, I’m not comfortable with it, even my sister is telling me to be careful.

I thought it was a good thing to see someone dear to you at any given opportunity.


Source; www.Livelystones.com.ng

Editor’s note:

This a question from a whatsapp member. What are your thoughts,how would you advice her friend? Drop your comments below.


Hello House.

I have a friend, she is married for about seven years now but no issue (has not been able to get pregnant) for years. Now the husband’s family are on her neck ( the husband’s family are putting pressure on her to have a baby) and because of that,she wants to quit (leave the marriage)

….. She chatted me up but the problem is beyond me. I don’t even know what to advice or say to her.

She also discovered that her husband is seeing someone else.

And what she can do to get pregnant. She is desperate.



From a concerned friend


https://livelystones.com.ng/childless-for-seven-years-my-friend-wants-to-leave-her-marriage/

true talk

frozen70:
My dear, I am married

If you know what happens in somany homes that have eventually lead to death of spouses you would have advised the deceased to move out earlier

Domestic violence is cousin's to religious war

In every religious war their must be casualties (death)

In domestic violence same thing happens

Dear Jzhane,

I have been trying to reach you for the past two months. Well am in an emotional and verbally abusive marriage which has lasted for 4 years 9 months. We and dated for a whole year before marriage.

To be honest, I saw all the red alerts but I kept telling my self he loves me and can’t hurt me. Through out the courtship he will quarrel,yell and get angry at me at the slightest provocation but I thought it was the pressure of planning the wedding.
Plus his mother disagreed to him marrying me so from the start. There were complications but I felt standing by him will solidify our marriage. Just few days after the wedding ,all his characters of abuse intensified but I kept giving excuses for him.
Also he had to collect a loan for the wedding from where he works which couldn’t cover the cost of both the traditional and white wedding. So from day one we were struggling financially. I kept faith hoping he finished servicing the loan things will normalize but still it got worse.
Immediately after the wedding also I got pregnant so all the pressure I was getting from him was affecting the pregnancy. I almost lost it getting prepared for the baby was strenuous but my mum helped providing most of d baby things.
Six months into the marriage he was cheating with a lady whom he introduced to me ...more


https://livelystones.com.ng/i-married-my-husband-despite-the-red-flags-now-i-live-with-his-abuse/



Note: this story was shared October 22,2018.
She reached out to us today saying she still want to opt out after all.....lets put her marriage in prayers. Also leave a word on the blog story.it might make the difference

Kindly

Lady reached out to us today saying she want to opt out despite all counseling.

We do not support divorce. Kindly comment on blog, who knows, that little advise may encourage her

Hi,

My name is Franc. I been following your blog for a while now. My girlfriend is a Nigerian and I been dating for about a year now.I like her a lot. She is strong,smart and very hardworking. She motivates me quite a lot. She moved to the states about four years ago and she is at the top of her game in her career.

My girl prides herself as a feminist and I do agree with some of her views. However,there are quite a lot of her views that appear quite weird to me. I have in fact made her know that I support the feminist movement but I also feel there are extremists taking advantage of this. She calls her self independent and needs not to submit to a man but she is pretty annoying most times.

My girl tends to be quite strong willed and opinionated and wants me to be the one to apologize first anytime we have a misunderstanding.I fear sometimes that I may not be able to keep up with her behavior. When I try to talk to her about it,she says I am trying to suppress her from having a voice of her own in our relationship. I definitely think her.....see more



https://livelystones.com.ng/my-girlfriend-has-a-behavior-disorder-but-she-calls-it-feminism/

Hi,

My name is Franc. I been following your blog for a while now. My girlfriend is a Nigerian and I been dating for about a year now.I like her a lot. She is strong,smart and very hardworking. She motivates me quite a lot. She moved to the states about four years ago and she is at the top of her game in her career.

My girl prides herself as a feminist and I do agree with some of her views. However,there are quite a lot of her views that appear quite weird to me. I have in fact made her know that I support the feminist movement but I also feel there are extremists taking advantage of this. She calls her self independent and needs not to submit to a man but she is pretty annoying most times.

My girl tends to be quite strong willed and opinionated and wants me to be the one to apologize first anytime we have a misunderstanding.I fear sometimes that I may not be able to keep up with her behavior. When I try to talk to her about it,she says I am trying to suppress her from having a voice of her own in our relationship. I definitely think her.....see more



https://livelystones.com.ng/my-girlfriend-has-a-behavior-disorder-but-she-calls-it-feminism/

Someone said maybe she went into depression after child birth and this is a valid point.

Please share your tut as this is from a NLander, he will be reading your advise, though he been counsel. But in the multitudes of counsel there is safety. God bless

[quote author=Oluromantic post=72630773][/quote]

bigkahuna704:
ON YOUR DEATH BED

Dear Jzhane,

I am a christian. Is it okay for a christian to file for divorce? The reason I ask this question is because I do not know what to do anymore. My marriage …I cannot even say if it still a marriage. As I write this,my wife has moved out of my house and I have not heard anything from her in the last three weeks.

My wife and I met in 2008. We dated for a while until she got pregnant. About that time,I had applied for a visa and I was just granted the visa and I was going to leave the country but she begged me not to leave in order not to embarrass her .So,we had our first baby in 2013.

I did not have much at the time and as such,my mother had to step in to support us financially. I would say that my mother has been supporting us financially and materially until we were able to get married a few years after our first baby. Even when the baby came,my mother was responsible for buying baby things for our baby.

Her mother was also a little bit supportive. As she was doing a medical course,her mother sent a little support at the time.

All was fine until I started noticing that a few weeks after my wife gave birth,she started having misunderstandings with my mother. I was hoping all will pass but it didn’t. Also,one day,my wife’s sister visited us and I overheard them talking. Her sister actually told her not to take things easy with her in-laws. I couldn’t hear everything in full but I gathered that they were talking about my mother and things like that.

In 2016,we had our second child. My mother came to visit as it is the custom of the Yoruba for the mother in-law to come visit when there is a new baby. Could you believe my wife......see more




https://livelystones.com.ng/when-is-divorce-acceptable-my-wife-has-made-marriage-a-living-hell/

Dear Jzhane,

I am a christian. Is it okay for a christian to file for divorce? The reason I ask this question is because I do not know what to do anymore. My marriage …I cannot even say if it still a marriage. As I write this,my wife has moved out of my house and I have not heard anything from her in the last three weeks.

My wife and I met in 2008. We dated for a while until she got pregnant. About that time,I had applied for a visa and I was just granted the visa and I was going to leave the country but she begged me not to leave in order not to embarrass her .So,we had our first baby in 2013.

I did not have much at the time and as such,my mother had to step in to support us financially. I would say that my mother has been supporting us financially and materially until we were able to get married a few years after our first baby. Even when the baby came,my mother was responsible for buying baby things for our baby.

Her mother was also a little bit supportive. As she was doing a medical course,her mother sent a little support at the time.

All was fine until I started noticing that a few weeks after my wife gave birth,she started having misunderstandings with my mother. I was hoping all will pass but it didn’t. Also,one day,my wife’s sister visited us and I overheard them talking. Her sister actually told her not to take things easy with her in-laws. I couldn’t hear everything in full but I gathered that they were talking about my mother and things like that.

In 2016,we had our second child. My mother came to visit as it is the custom of the Yoruba for the mother in-law to come visit when there is a new baby. Could you believe my wife......see more




https://livelystones.com.ng/when-is-divorce-acceptable-my-wife-has-made-marriage-a-living-hell/