₦airaland Forum

deols: @tintingz, do you really need all of these arguments.

Chauvinism doesnt suit you jor.

Like the op, I believe polygyny isnt only wanted by men. There are women who thrive in such unions. Allowing them that is good enough.



I must say that I agree with many of feminist views. There are other terms to describe women who don't want to keep to the real, men-hating feminism.They could be womanist or members of women organisations.

I am a humanist btw.

humanist....?!


i thought u were a muslim

do you really know what humanism means

[quote author=I.Joan]Same here!

Nope... not yet![/quote]get it... cool movie

700 wives and 300 concubines


Damn...


Solo.. How can you please them
Well you are the wisest man that ever lived



[quote author=Efemena_xy]Ah! How could I forget David and Solomon? Especially that randy Solomon of a guy??

My Sunday school teachers would be sorely disappointed in me! [/quote]

hmmmmm

May God help us

baldman: My perspective is that if she wants to avoid divorce, she will have to deal with that, as a Christian, the deceit is no ground for divorce. She will have to deal with that, the damage has been done, you don't cure an headache by cutting the head. If she can find a place in her heart to forgive him, she should and try to move on, thank God he is not impotent.



Someone ask what will happen if the biological father comes to claim the children? Yoruba proverb says " O n bi ni ko to o n wo ni' the one that procreated a child does not have a better standing than the one that raised the child, moreover, that is something that the man who married without having regard to his condition should be prepared to deal with. But for the woman, her children will always be her children.

kulyie: that is a lie fabricated by men who lack self control.if all men are polygamous in nature,why are the likes of bill gates,obama,the founder of apple,i cant remember his name and the facebook guy,mark something.why are they not married to 4 wives.it is when you want to perform an action that is contrary to common sense and rationality you hide under the guise of religion (islam)

founder of facebook - Mark Zuckerberg

Princess zoe: Efemena the earlier you surrender your life to christ the better for you. Do i need to drag the truth concerning this issue with you? Oh no, i don't think so "for we can do nothing against the truth, but for the truth". However, where did you get the bible that recorded that job was a polygamist? For your information, his first wife left him during his days of agony and when God blessed him again, he remarried because his first wife left him and was no were to be found, is that your own definition of polygamy? Abraham was never the one who brought hagga up as his second wife. His wife sarah, wholeheartedly gave him the second wife, and what happened? Ishamel was never recognised by God the way isaac was, abraham later ended up in sending hagga and his son away. Like i said "for we can do nothing against the truth, but for the truth" but the choice is yours.

Ok if Abraham no suit you.. let me give you a list... take your pick

David, Solomon, Judah,Lamech, Rehobaom, etc

free2ryhme: If you had don counseling before the marriage certain things would have been avoided> if you did then God is in control

why do you think so... that she missed it because of marriage counselling
will marriage counselling reveal that he had a fertility problem

ayans4: @ teeo, what of the future implication of this.
when the child/ children become "somebody/ some people" in the society and the relative comes knocking as the biological father.....?

hmmm this can be a work around but for a family that had already victimised you because of their perception of the condition

They can use you to raise the child and claim that child

I just feel it is low making fun of someone's fertility issue
The person is already suffering,,, haba

ayans4: @ Biola bee, yes I am employed and have a good job.....my strategy is to seek for annulment, and pray I get it quick to help me move on with life.....
@ Breathless....thank you so much.
@ slimyem....what's your opinion?

This strategy is not bad... however i belive yu need to give yourself some time to think it through
What are your parents saying

Maybe you need to pack out of that home for a temporary separation / redeemed camp retreat or mountain journey and think it through all the pros and cons of each option considering the impact and seek divine guidance

[quote author=I.Joan]Every dialogue that involved the German Doctor!
And the shooting scenes...
I like the way he blew that guy's head(the 3rd brittle brother) off from a distance...[/quote]Chris Waltz is the bomb,.... sad he was killed though
Have u seen Inglorious Basterds..

Congrats on this ..

Your thread on a cursory glance looks so interesting

Will go back later..

SeanBell: Thank you slimyem and teeo,I updated in my diary oo with a pic of him

So if I may ask what about the hubby's deliberate deceit

baldman: @ OP : Are you a Christian? Do you believe in the bible? Are there conditions attached to the vows you exchanged before men and God (Like 'I am saying I do only on the condition that there are no secrets you are hiding from me), do you believe that God hates Divorce and that if you are divorcing you are doing that only on the basis of adultery and there can be no subsequent marriage as long as your ex-husband is still alive? Are you aware that infertility is not one of the grounds for divorce neither is failure to disclose health condition?. Are you willing to take a chance should the act of divorce be found to be indeed capable of depriving you of entry into God's eternal kingdom where neither marriage and motherhood have no relevance?

Look at the man you are married to and ask yourself if you would have felt completed and fulfilled with him, if there is no infertility issue? Besides the infertility, is this man a good man, your dream man? Is this man generally a liar or this is a one off thing?
You have to understand that no family is perfect and everyone has their secrets hidden behind the smiles and giggles that we are seeing all over the place.

My suggestion may seems a bit off, but if you do not want to divorce and you do not want children that you cannot call your own, and this man you are married to is really someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, get any of your husband's brothers, preferably a married one to make the sperm donations. Your children will be yours and they will carry what is practicably nearest to your husband's genes. Your marriage will be intact unless you choose to make it otherwise and your children will always belong to one family line. It is what the old testament would recommend.

Otherwise, you can just go and remarry, have children and live happily until every time someone shows your the part of the scriptures where God says your marriage is an adultery.

There is no easy solution to this problem. I pray God will guide you right.

I appreciate your logic and honesty on your feelings

She is really in a tough place

Your analysis on marital arrangements being clean or unclean on the basis of religion is mint

[quote author=Efemena_xy]On the contrary, I would say that the main hurt here is that he took away her freedom of choice. What he did was self-centered (thinking about his wants only) and cowardly (afraid to take the risk of her leaving him).

A real man in this situation would have laid his cards out on the table and told her exactly what the situation is/was, and then left her to make her own choice. She should have been given the choice to decide whether or not she wanted to get into the marriage boat with him, knowing he couldn't have kids of his own.

It's a risk he should have taken and trusted her to make the right decision. You might be surprised, telling her the truth from the onset would probably have made her love him even more and they would have explored other 'options' available. But like I said, he 'took' that choice away from her, and replaced it with deceit.



And more deceit from the man.

There is just no other way to colour it, he knew exactly what he was doing and even when the heat got too much, re: his family attacking her and throwing out her belongings, he did nothing about it! Please!

Na wa oh! I can't believe I'm going to mention this as suggested by someone here earlier...

Ayans: Would you consider having a sperm donor from a member of his family, so that at the very least, the family can't claim that the child isn't theirs or has no right to bear the family name? (Choi!! I can't do it o! I really can't...but this isn't about me...)[/quote]

..

ayans4: @ Biolabee....sorry, I don't understand your last post.

which one... about 3rd parties?

I meant that the influence of third parties usually is negative in a marriage

If its not that one, please quote it...

since you are economically stable, well you are not tied to the man because of financial ebnefits so the decision is really yours but a man who has allowed his family to ridicule you for something he was responsible for ... well i dont know

Is he the one that suggested the donor sperm or its from you

why did these guy not check medically before releasing this kin of secret

haba,,,, 3rd parties are not the best in a marriage

breathless: AYANS4, I sincerely feel 4 u. f u were my biological sister, my human nature will ask me 2 tell u 2 walk away but my spirit man says otherwise. U `ll go down in history as one of the few modern women dat got married as a virgin in a world dat is so so corrupted. The least u deserve is a honest n sincere man 4 a hubby n a truly happy home n family.
However, pls ask ursef again and again, what and why did u marry dis man? If its 4 just procreation, then u re missing it. Becos other than dis, u seem ok wt ur marriage.
your story is similar 2 dat of a lady who while dating d hubby confided in him dat she had 2 D & C in d past. Now 3 yrs into d marriage, she yet 2 conceive and d hubby goes 2 his in-laws 2 reveal d secret d wife told him. She was so devastated she almost died of depression. Now upon further medical examit was discovered dat d problem actually is wt d hubby similar 2 dis scenario.
I don`t know how strong ur faith is, if only u just believe n trust in GOD. With HIM all things are possible. A good number of suggestions have bn made particulary wt reference 2 divorce, which not an option here. I`ll pray n trust God along wt u believing he `ll make a smile on ur face someday soonest.
Stay blessed Mummy.

eyoniggar: Bro thats cowcrap, so how come they were stil after the kyubi and the hachibi even after the little peice of Chakra of both tails were taken? If reviving the jubi was actually to have a peice of chakra from each of the tailed beast, then akatsuki wouldn't even go to any rigorous length to gather tailed beast in order to revive the jubi, they'll only formalise a simple tactics to gather chakra from each tailed beast rather than hunting the jinchuriki and having the whole entire tailed beast extracted from its host. The storyline has been crooked since 2016.

On this one I give it to you 100 percent
The story about the partial 8 and kyuubi was to kick start the transformation process and then they move to get them so they can do the moon eye plan.so really how can the partial chakras be enough?

Now i have a hunch on how it was easy for kakashi to beat the renegade tobito...
He allowed himself to be stabbed and force madara's hand
He already had the fall back for this all the while madara was rotting in the grave

It does not make sense that the tobito we know was beaten by one raikiri?!
Not even sasgay's special raikiri variants....


However i go talk say SHEET DEY SMELL

dayokanu: Whats the difference between Anambra men and Imo men?

I tire o...

And some bigoted posters on this forum make ibos seems like the best thing since sliced bread
so ibos are also ethnophobes

Yes

Go lisky

9 7 in the 3rd set

ayans4: Ironically, DS maybe out of it too because as a result of the fracas that brought about the "revelation",my family parents, siblings etc are not happy with their behaviour since they threw my bags out, asked me for my children amongst other insults/ embarrassments I got from them....so after the fertility tests results, and after I told him that I cannot continue in the marriage, he got his family members far and near to talk to me about continuing.....
so, they are aware that he cannot "father" a child.....

All due respect, this is a wicked family

ol boy eh.. this matter na strong thing

Efemena and teeo has laid out the course of action and you know what you may have to do

To me This issue is not the superiority of (non)testing camps but rather the sligh mistreatment she has suffered

How dare your hubby family members call you infertile? That smacks of insensitivity of the highest order

If your man was the type that will care for an adopted person, the decision to stay will have been an easier one

On the issue raised by yellowpawpaw, I believe this condition does not affect the love making abilities of the man just only the fertility?

OP are you employed.. what is your exit strategy?

May God help us all

toshmann: Why not, you feminists are willing to empower women with unwanted pregnancy to travel to Europe to get an abortion but no one is willing to emphasize prevention of unwanted pregnancy and personal responsibility.



He meant to say 20weeks. The Texas anti abprtion law was for abortions beyond 20th week of gestation. Una fit do am by 19th week o, still dem de vex.

Thanks for pointing this out,,....

toshmann: ok, I get that. Lets just say, we disagree on abortion. Just as you are pro women's right pro abortion, I'm anti-abortion. We will never agree on that.


I think he loves you
Why don't you guys exchange phone numbers and addresses, lets take it from there. . . . . .

OH finally I get the statement on the 9 months... i am just seeing i made a mistake
My mind was on something else at the same and i wrote months instead of weeks

fellis, you mean admitting weeks when you and i know it was weeks i meant is why you called me a liar

Haba.. do you have this deep a need to be right especially where guys are concerned?

I meant weeks, slip of pen i wrote months.. bite me

radswanka - lisky first set 3 3

Go Lisicki!!

Bartoli already in the final

hell hath no fury as a woman spurned for a younger model

fellis: Pregnancies typically last for just nine months. . . . . .

I meant women patronising quacks to do quick abortions will endanger their own lives
It is better off they avoid preganancies altogether via birth control

haba... now you want to teach me gestation of human babies

Loving the jawjaw

Nice points so far

He is a football genius

nikkykay: Keep it to ursef alone pleasssee

nikkykay: Biola pleasssssse
Dont even think of Suarez.
Plsssssss
Lets hope GH comes with his peeps to London today as reported

haha... its just my preference

adaobi123: Im only on episode 3

no wahala... u have some way to go.... but u can come in and drop your comments,... we dissect them

i on episode 2 in the final season 3

adaobi123: The show of course............and spartacus

The show is ok but the man?!.....Sura's gonna smoke ur arze.... shes a mean lady.. u see how she slaughtered the Getai raiders?

True.....I clear off the road when i hear them coming

To be alive is better than being killed for nothing

blink182: When you hear a siren and see a long convoy, please leave the road totally. Stop deceiving yourself that you have the same right with a government official because they will kill you for nothing and no case.

I remember when James Ibori was governor, he had six patrol bikes on his convoy. 2 stayed with the convoy, 2 ended the convoy while 2 went as far as the following town to announce the approach of his excellency's convoy. They ran that distance to and fro until the convoy gets there and passes. Meanwhile the convoy of over 20 cars could pass you before you say 'James Ibori'. If they hit you, death is sure and if you survive, pray against police brutality.

Bottom line is, you see an official coming, leave the damn road for them to pass.

All animals are equal but some are more equal than others.

pretty lady,,... nice pert derrière in The last king of Scotland

was killed in a nasty way by Idi Amin and dismembered too

adaobi123: I'm in love

in love with whom....