₦airaland Forum

Ihedinobi: Obviously, opposite does not necessarily mean incompatible. But what some critics here missed is that these two were not even looking to maximize the good things in their differences, rather they were stumbling all over and fighting over them. That alone meant thay neither was ready to be married.

The fact that the lady was more inclined to save and be smart with finances should have made her even more attractive and lovable by the man and the fact that the man was impulsive should have made him a breath of fresh air for her because what's the use of being so careful with your finances if you can't treat and reward yourself every now and then?

These two would have been compatible if they were really looking to get married not just to acquire a new status. So the argument against desperation still holds.



There is no such thing as spontaneity in choosing a mate. This is inexcusable, but that is not to say that it cannot and does not work. Every now and then a shot in the dark does hit its mark. That can never be read to mean that one should wait for the night to take a shot that is best taken when the sun is high and the eyes are sharp.

If I were the girl, I'd run. If I were the man, I'd hide my head in shame in some remote island for a year at least for pulling such an iddiotic stunt.

Now, it is very possible that because of strong experience one can tell in a very short time when they've found their mate, but that's only one side of the equation. What about the other guy or girl that you're proposing to or who should propose to you? Don't they deserve to make sure that they see what you see too?

I could meet the one I know I ought to be with for the rest of my life, but it would be very selfish of me to spring such a sudden decision on them before they've evaluated me and what being with me makes them.

So, here again, the argument against desperation stands.



And what is wrong with the above? I didn't hear any of our trigger-happy "proponents" (says who?) of marriage explain what is.



It doesn't mean you can't fall in love fast. It just means that you need to and should give your partner the chance to get to know you and how you fit. It's really a desperate person who digs their claws into their potential spouse like they're afraid they'll run from them.

And a desperate person is not looking to marry you particularly, they're not in love with you particularly. They're in love with being married and they'll marry a pole if it could put the ring on their finger.



Now why would anyone want to be on every dating site they know?



What human male has a real argument against this? When we men love, it's a war and we want to win and we'll use whatever works to win, but the guy who is fighting to win a woman he loves acts differently from the guy who's fighting to win a status he loves.

The guy after a woman who's got his heart is ssmart and kind. He takes his time to woo (note the nearly extinct word) her to him, that is, to attract her to him, to make himself a strongest option in her array of options. He works to encourage her to come to him of her own volition.

The guy after a ring and a status goes after the woman like a hound after rabbits. And hounds don't care for rabbits. They don't make a home for them and bring them food and warm them when they're cold etc, they kill them and not necessarily for food.

The true man will give gifts but he'll not hide behind them because he's confident not desperate and he's after a woman whom he believes has value and is aware of it and not desperate either.



It's too soon to meet the family when you haven't met me properly first. When we have got on the same page, then why in the world should we not run home to our parents to show who not what we've won for our efforts?



Where is this false?



Marriage is not a sign either that one's matured. It's a decision one makesin line with the purpose of their lives. I could be an adult, whivh is the same as saying that I'm mature, and still not be married. Marriage only counts with respect to the purpose of an individual's particular existence.

That said, social pressure does not define the purpose of any given person's life. That is defined by the Maker of the person. And when the Maker has defined it, it is the person's responsibility to make choices that align with that purspose.

Ihedinobi: Obviously, opposite does not necessarily mean incompatible. But what some critics here missed is that these two were not even looking to maximize the good things in their differences, rather they were stumbling all over and fighting over them. That alone meant thay neither was ready to be married.

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Marriage is not a sign either that one's matured. It's a decision one makes in line with the purpose of their lives. I could be an adult, whivh is the same as saying that I'm mature, and still not be married. Marriage only counts with respect to the purpose of an individual's particular existence.

---

That said, social pressure does not define the purpose of any given person's life. That is defined by the Maker of the person. And when the Maker has defined it, it is the person's responsibility to make choices that align with that purpose.

Idowuogbo:
ogabee, ignore d arindin abeg!

try69: I don't just say shiiiit, I read before I say shiiiitt...gerit?

B/w, there is difference between a topic tag and the attack approach.

yamunla: no be small tin bros,thank God NL is a faceless forum..dey for no gang up abuse her,na beating she for collect.."Kulyie is entitled to her opinion abeg oo"..

Fussbot: wat is dis?

Samabu07: I just realised some days ago that my two years and a month relationship is gone down the drain. My gf had multiple relationships with other guys. She told me she's gone with one of the guys. I have been faithful all through this years. I only take solace in the good I have done.
Its better to have broken relationships than a broken home.

tintingz: next judge https://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-eatdrink014.gif

Idowuogbo: Abi o!!!! freedom of movement and speech. eni to ban binu aye ko lo po kun so.

yamunla: Aye n binu o..pple are vexing badaly..if pple catch dis kuli-kulie girl for real life..oma brutal gan o... Live ur life jare,if u like no born pikin sef..ko kan aye!

try69: Jus like oga ihedinobi left and concentrated on them..

And oh..u also did to me..circle?

Ihedinobi: @kulyie

Your chosen path is a courageous one. It is full of challenges and troubles and pressures and the threat of regret. But I'm rejoicing in the fact that you claim the Lord Christ. He is able to lead you aright.

However, never let yourself feel the need to defend yourself and validate your decisions to undeserving people. It will get your eyes off the mark and engender bitterness. You need neither. Keep your spirit sweet. And keep your garden ready for the one who deserves it. Those are the things worthy of your energies.

God bless you, sister.

Idowuogbo: who b dis? see frustration? bobo,u'll just die of heart-attack if you continue to take everything u read on nl serious. msteew! park go left make i see better person joor! U Vagabon!

try69: Long crap

slimyem: What's this thread about again?
Kulyie?

kulyie: i tire o.e be like say they don turn jenny's thread to shewa dissing sunday and of course them go meet me there

emi na o shey eran riro 8-)

yellowpawpaw: I don't know whether u guys read what d poster said.she contributed!
I no dey vex but I'm very realistic.hubby must be willing to part with some doe or I will get it and when I do,will not give him his own back.if I don't know what to do with it,I can give it out,at least I will hv my blessin

waleadex: It's not good if you confront him because your hubby already told you not to and the man didn't borrow from you but from hubby.

Caracta: Odikwa serious

*sprinkles holy water on thread*

yellowpawpaw: From d posts I've bn reading here so far,I can say dat men like to swallow shit cos they want to show d world dey r men!incredible!
My hard sweat? I will leave it under one condition;hubby will give me back my own and case will be closed.he can then continue with his father xmas bonanza!
Of course most men will tell u leave it and d wives will second. That is d one u r aware of.what of those u don't know? Ex,colleques, acquintances,etc
That is how family income go down d drain! Money is hard to get and easy to throw away.
I will definitely confront him with fire coming out from my eyes! He must pay.what arrant nonsense is that? It is called borrowing no matter how small! Mcheeeew for good wife!
Later,if hubby is annoyed(can't even c d reason why)I will become d good wife again.is he not my husband?but first I gat to treat d dat fuckup.

thegoodjoehunt: Football is the most loved game in the world. Lots at the moment are talking about it now passionately. How come you zero in on Africans.

Go on Twitter and see what is trending. I guess they are all Nigerians.

Raiyo: Yes they are very much Nigerians same as David Alaba.

In legal terms, there are two ways by which one can primarily attain citizenship of a state, they are jus Sangunuinis or right of blood and Jus soli or by soil.

If Citizenship is acquired by Jus Sangunuinis, which is the case in Nigeria, then because of the fact that one has Nigerian parentage and blood, they have automatically become Nigerian citizens,and the fact that they too were born JUS SOLI or on the soil of their present nationalities they are also citizens of those states.


BOTTOM LINE;

THEY ARE ALL NIGERIANS.

mbhs139:

Abi o! Na him country man him behead now, wetin come concern 9ja inside.

shopclue: Shut the Bleep up and leave gree-dia in peace. You don't own her mind, her thoughts, her opinions whether she's asking for shopclue's murder or she's pointing out what she feels about her.

Take up your case with me and give me the authority you have to have a say in this.

Did aigbe asked you to speak on his behalf about his money still yet to be paid? Or the car that was never shipped?

You're are the hypocrite and the one whose manhood is malfunctioning because your investment and recent witness on the stand that called himself Carl, the american is now found wanting as well and it is really embarrassing because you've been counting on his testimony to do that which you have spent months unable to do. To indict shopclue.

kidsam: When your hubby tells you to leave something, please leave it. Why are women so troublesome, you think life is only about comfronting and confronting? Just leave it as your husband has spoken.

click2cbn: [b][/b] SOMEONE IS HIGH ON MUNCHEN BEER

Caracta: He tagged me a feminist too. Don't be surprised. In nairaland, we see all sorts.