₦airaland Forum

One day, Little Akpor's teacher, Miss Doris asked the class, "Children, if you know the answer, please raise your hand! Tell me things you can suck!"
"Ice cream, mam!" Little Mary answered.
"Good, Mary." Miss Doris said, "Anyone else?”
"How about a lollipop!" said Steven.
"Very good, now it's your turn Akpors!” the teacher said.
Little Akpors, sitting at back then answered, "A lamp!”

The teacher and all of the students wondered about Little Akpors answer. Then the teacher asked him,"Akpors, why do you think one can suck lamp?"
"Well, last night when I passed my parents' bedroom", Little Akpors answered, "I heard my mom say, 'turn off the lamp, honey and let me suck it.

AKPORS IN APTITUDE TEST

Teacher: 2 Books + 2 Books?

Akpors: 4 Books
...

Teacher: Now I'll ask you a tough one 1,789,365 Books +23,678 Books…?

Akpors: LIBRARY.

Akpors was chatting wit his wife at dinner:

Wife: i wouldn't have married u if only i knew u were this poor.

Akpors: hahahahaha..... ...!

Wife: whats so funny n why are u laughing?

Akpors: when i told u "u were da only thing i had" what were u thinking abt?

The Teacher was annoyed by akpors's habit Of Farting So Loud..
She Called Him in Her Office..

Teacher: Why Do you Always Fart too
Loud in Class?

Akpors: Its the Only thing am Best at!'
and No one can beat me On that..'
akpors poured some Chalk dust on the table And Dropped His pants,
farted and Blew almost all the Chalk dust..
(The Teacher Became Annoyed and Wanted to Prove to akpors that She can Do it Better.., she poured Some
Chalk dust, Dropped her Pants and gave a Big Fart that Blew all the chalk
dust, leaving the Table Clean..

Akpors Became soo amazed, coz
he always thought He was The Best..
As the Teacher was Dressing, akpors looked under Her and Said,
"No wonder you Have defeated me!"

Teacher asked, "Why?"

Akpors said, "You Have Two holes
Down there

AKPORS WAS IN MENTAL HOSPITAL FOR 7 YEARS AND WANTED TO GET OUT REALLY BAD SO HE SPENT 5 MONTHS PRACTICING TO JUMP OVER THE GATE.

THE DAY CAME FOR HIM 2 ESPCAPE AND GAVE GOODBYES TO HIS FRIENDS..AND VANISHED AFTER 2 MINS HE CAME BACK AND HIS FRIENDS ASK IF HE HAD FORGOTEN SOMETHING
HE SAID" YES THE GATE WAS OPENED SO I COULDN'T JUMP I'LL TRY TOMORROW"

After dipping AKPOS three times in
water, Brother Peter said to him
"U are now a new creature, so
your name is no longer Akpos but
Paul. Frm now onward, no eating
of meat. Our church does not eat
meat! Only fish"
On arrival home,Akpos,now Paul
dipped his meat in water three
times and den said, "from now on
your new name na FISH

Father: Why did your
Grammar teacher slap you?
Akpos: Because I asked her, Why
is Bra singular when it covers 2
items and Panties plural when it
covers just one

little akpors gets on a city bus and
sits right behind the driver and
starts yelling, ''If my dad was a
bull and my mom a cow I'd be a
little bull.''The driver starts getting
mad at noisy akpors, who
continues with, ''If my dad was an
elephant and my mom a girl
elephant I would be a little
elephant.''
akpors goes on wi...th several
animals until the bus driver gets
angry and yells at akpors,
''What if your dad was a drunk
and your mom was a
prostitute?!''
akpors smiles and says, ''I would
be a bus driver!''

Little Akpors came in to the kitchen and found his grandmother eating breakfast.
"Where is mom and dad he asks?" His grandmother replied: "They'r still in bed." Akpors smiled and went to play.
Two hours later he came back and asked,"Where is mom & dad?" His grandmother replied: "They are still in bed."He
giggled and went back to play.
He came back at lunch and asked,"Where is mom & dad, are they still in bed?" His grandmother replied: Yea...Akpors
laughed. What d laughin abt?"asked his grandmother.
Akpors replied: "Last night dad came into my room asking for Vaseline and I gave him super glue

SEE MATHEMATICAL AKPOS IN CLASS, THE TEACHER IS ASKING HIM SOME
LITTLE MATHS QUESTIONS.. READ D CONVERSATIONS BELOW ITS FUNNY!
Teacher: If I give you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2 cats, how many cats will you
have?
AKPOS: Seven, Sir.
Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2 cats,
how many will you have?
AKPOS: Seven.
Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I give you 2apples, and another 2 apples and
another 2 apples, howmany will you have?
AKPOS: Six.
Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you 2 cats, and another 2cats and another 2 cats, how many
cats will you have?
AKPOS: Seven!!!
Angry Teacher : Where did you get ur seven from?
AKPOS: (Angrilly!) Because I already get 1 cat for House!

Mrs Akpors lost 3 panties in her house and blamed her maid in the presence of the husband - Mr Akpors.

The embarrassed maid said,
"Oga, thank God say u dey here, U be my witness. You know say I no dey wear panties".
YEPAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Mrs Akpors fainted.

Its Akpors again . One day a techer fell asleep in class, akpors went to him and said ''teacher, are
you sleeping?'' ''no!!'', the teacher replied. Then akpors asked,''what are you doing then?'' ''i am
talking to God'', replied the teacher. Then the next day, akpors fell asleep as well. The teacher went
to him and said "akpors, are you sleeping in my class?" "No!" replied akpors. "What are you doing
then?" asked the teacher. "i am talking to God as well", said akpors. The angry teacher shouted,
"what did your God say?" then akpors said, "He said he never talked to you yesterday

Akpors spat saliva and rubbed on his head. Teacher: Akpors! What stupid thing are you
doing? ...Why are you smearing your head with saliva? Akpors: Madam! I overheard my Mum last
night telling my Dad in their Bedroom, that if it is hard and not entering properly, he should apply
saliva on the head and it will surely enter! Because what you are teaching is not entering, I have 2
rub saliva on my head.