₦airaland Forum

Stephen0mozzy:
Lol.. e dey correct pidgin.
Uwa, na abasay we dey use for our side.

"As per say" doesn't express the same thing.

"Make I send you 10k asper say I be Dangote" ✅

"Abasay we just see 500k for ground now, wetin you go use am do?" ✅

You get it?

Lol. Funny you!

Stephen0mozzy:
"Abasay" - Edo pidgin for "Let's assume that..." 😅 I be think say it's a general pidgin term by now

It's "asper say"

Doveheart:
Actually, is not the fault of my friend, its what his wife and her mum is cool with, At times, my friend said he will want to avoid the mother-inlaw washing his clothes but its the wife that will just pack and give her mum to wash, and its because is her mother that is washing her children.s clothes even now that they are adult

He should sort his dirty cloths and give to the laundry. He can do his underwear himself.
Why would he even keep his dirty cloths for his wife that just gave birth to wash alongside the children's cloths.
If his mother in-law where not around his wife would have seen shege pro max.
Let him get a help for his wife!

Doveheart:
Aba! setting on fire kwa! You people should always learn to be polite in your responses. Must you pass a negative message on the poster.?? You are the one that wants to set the whole thing on fire here.
Am just trying to get a help for him here since the whole situation is a surprise to him and more so, he is not too comfortable about this extreme activities of his mother-inlaw at home.

Be rational with the truth! If you actually wanted to help, you would have sought for others opinion on the issue before bringing up the matter with your friend. I am sure you would have been advised to mind your business.
When it comes to people's marriages, you exercise caution before giving unsolicited advise or suggestions.

netmillionaires:
Who be that ghost wey dey hold the lady in green waist?

Lol.

Bluna:

The fashion designer that made this dress deserves a national award:
👇

I just screen shot it too.bI hope mu tailor can make something near. Let it not be a case of " what you ordered vs what you got". Lol

Doveheart:
Hello Nairalanders,
This is what I just noticed in my friend's house each time I visit. His mother in law actually came to do omugwo, taking care and staying with the baby when his mum has gone to work. but to my surprise, I discovered she is the one doing the house chores, sweeping, watching both the husband's (my friend) clothes and the wife's clothes together with the baby's clothes. She cooks and serves everybody's food while the wife only give the food to the husband. The wife seldom enter the kitchen even on weekends when everyone is around. I told my friend about my observation and he said he feels it strange to him too. Please nairalanders how do you understand this scenario whether is normal or abnormal. The mother in-law is yoruba and my friend also is Yoruba.

Amebo! It is called Omugwo for a reason. Tell your friend to employ a maid to support his wife. I don't know why you feel comfortable setting up your friends home on fire.

Privateworld:
I did traditional marriage may 2024 and this month makes it two years now. My main issue is my wife hasnt put to bed and i dont have patience anymore. I want a child and i dont want to be disrespectful by having an affair while been in marriage. I want to return her bride price and look for someone else.

I need advice on the how to go about the process of returning bride price. She is a calabar girl and I'm from Adamawa .

It appears you have seen another lady from your tribe outside.
Hope you have both gone for fertility test. Most times when couples are TTC all fingers are being pointed to the woman forgetting that it takes 2 to make a baby.

If she meets all your criteria except the fertility issue,I will advice you exercise more patience and seek medical help. What is the doctor saying?

Stephen0mozzy:
If this is true, food don done.
First, the lady should ensure this email came from a number or mail that is traceable as an official outlet of the said loan app.

THEN SHE SHOULD PAY THE LOAN.

Now, go get a lawyer who likes to cash out. Sue them, and make una settle out of court for like #5million.

Pay what? Person wey don die they pay debt?
They should say Bye bye to their money.

CharlotteFlair:
Most of you here who always say rubbish about a guy falling in love do so because you are not lovable yourselves. You all lack what it takes to love and be loved in return. You are all the male version of that his girlfriend.

Don't mind them. Some of them can't even clean up after themselves.
All they know is to be calling simps,simps up and down.

gunners160:
First and foremost, for me the best thing to do at that point was to give r space which I believe he did. Let's not forget,every one has a way they manage anger. Some prefer moving away from d cause others don't care and can stay. Firstly, how on earth will some one u claim to love will go through that stress and words like " Dear sorry, well done, hope u are not stressed "did not come out from the lady and u want him to clap for r and say well-done? "After all, he does not deserve to be angry he need to communicate". I will say this without any iota of doubt "The lady intentionally orchestrated her disappearance"..She used the excuse of easing rself j to find a way of escaping" She wants 2 reduce d damage so she sorted into "gaslighting". That was why she could not say sorry when the issue was brought up. She has planned on telling people different stories so as to manipulate it to fit r side. "After all, we are now in a society that backs women up even if they messed up" She wants a way to spend time with some one else which she got. If not, why did she not stay in her parents house? Habi those once too did not wait for r to ease rself?. I have seen women bring up this technique several times. They bring up a fight so that they can disappear. Funny enough the Moda sided with this rubbish and stopped him from calling r husband. She knows something which the OP does not knw. He should think before leaping

You do not use a few irrational behavior of some females to generalise in all situations. There is really no blueprint for marriage. Some people started on a controversial note and ended up having a good marriage.
I pray she is found. They both need to go for counseling!

gunners160:
This is a rubbish talk. How would you call this anger issue. Do you pray to get maried to some onw who does not care for you at all. Do you wish to get maried to a selfish wife. U are one of the people who make women feel they are everything. She did bad and the man responded. Or do you expect him to sing her a lulaby for a behaviour that shows selfishness. Abegi, if e reach ur turn calm down and be quiet

A moment of uncontrolled anger can cause a life time damage. Didn't you read where the op said she tried to initiate communication with him and he gave her a silent treatment. See what the whole thing has led him. Who leaves a pregnant woman alone at night to urinate in the middle of God knows wear all because of anger. I just pray she is safe!

But if the whole disappearance was orchestrated by her,she no just try at all. The Op should have a rethink about the union.

Ehinjuola:
Please, I need sincere advice because my mind is not at rest anymore. What started as a normal family visit has suddenly turned into something I never imagined in my life.
My wife and I went to her family house to discuss our forthcoming engagement and other marriage arrangements since she is already pregnant. The discussion took longer than expected, and before we knew it, it was already late in the evening. To make matters worse, rain started falling heavily, and getting transportation back home became very difficult.

I was outside in the rain, moving around and searching for a vehicle that could convey us and my uncle, who accompanied me, back home safely. Throughout that stressful moment, my wife didn’t even seem concerned. She stayed where she was without making any effort to assist or even show worry about the situation. Surprisingly, her mother later came out to meet me at the roadside, praying and hoping we would find a vehicle soon. Even her father’s younger brother joined me in searching for transportation.

After almost one hour, we finally got a cab. While we were inside the vehicle, my wife tried to start a conversation, but I was already upset and disappointed, so I kept quiet. After dropping my uncle close to his destination, we continued our journey home in silence.

At some point on the road, I finally spoke out in anger. I asked her why she behaved so unconcerned despite the fact that we came to her family house for something very important concerning our future together. Instead of calming things down, she became angry too and started saying hurtful words back at me.

As we were walking home, she suddenly said she wanted to ease herself by the roadside. Because I was still angry, I continued walking slowly ahead without paying much attention. After a few minutes, I looked back and realized she was no longer behind me.
I immediately returned to the exact spot where she said she wanted to ease herself, but I couldn’t find her anywhere.
Since that night, my wife has been missing for 4 days.

I have contacted her mother several times, but she told me not to report the matter to her father yet. According to her, she believes her daughter is safe and will eventually return home. But honestly, I’m becoming very suspicious and confused. Part of me feels she may know where my wife is hiding, but I can’t say for sure.

What keeps disturbing me the most is this: Where did my pregnant wife sleep that night? Who is she with? Is she safe? And why would she disappear without contacting anyone for 4 days?

Right now, I’m emotionally exhausted and scared. I truly love my wife despite our misunderstanding, and I never imagined something like this would happen over an argument.

Please, experienced married men and women on this forum, what should I do at this point? Should I involve her father and report this officially, or should I still keep waiting and hope she comes back on her own?

Tell her mom you want to report to the police
If she is in the know,she will own up!. I guess she herself does not want police wahala.
This should be a lesson for you,learn to communicate properly instead of giving unnecessary attitude!

Baby mama and divorcee wahala!
They want you to take up your responsibility,and at the same time want you to fail in life so they can rejoice! As how nao?

QuinQ:
So if your rich husband you depend on 100% go get one unserious side girl so, dovorce him immediately? Okay o, me I no understand this "spirituality"

Will you accept a cheating wife back?

Yorubastardz:
Real life doings.

But why are you girls so good at making horrible decisions??

If she allow me date am
Na she for dey chop my money now

You girls are so bad at making decisions
Una go chase away the right one
Then start crying tears of regret in Shiloh

She dodged a bullet. You sound too petty!

Make una chill! Loosen up a bit, a little fun here and there will do.

drstranged:
Disvirgining a girl shouldn't be a criteria for marriage

Who do you want him to leave her for?

Skippyvibes:
More pictures jus for fun

Is it the lacoco bitters or the Video Cassette?

"Doctor of the future" disciple.

BigYash:
I don't see any issues here, except for the fact that you just want to make issues out of it. Which will not be good for your marriage on the long run.

As long as he is not diverting your personal money into the project,and he is still standing up to his responsibility in the family,madam you have to let this slide.

Yes,he didn't involve you. He has his reason,and this your attitude might be the reason why.

That house he is building still belongs to your kids( your first son),even though your husband's parent might live there , till they pass.

Madam relax o,no go spoil your marriage with this your thinking please.

You can only be scared if you stole him from another woman who has grown up kids..

I hope you will give same advice if the reverse were to be the case?

Dickson178:
Money! No woman will insult you when you have the money to take care of everything.

That's not true!
We have billionaires and millionaires that are divorced,their money couldn't keep their spouse.

We dont let quarrels or argument linger. It naturally fades away the next moment like it never happened . It baffles me also. I think it is maturity or what?

My home is my safe haven,I can't trade my peace of mind for anything. Thank God for giving me a spouse that his marital goals aligns with mine.

CYBERWEAVER:
I am currently planning to get married. I’ve been with my babe for about a year now.

After several consultations, we agreed on a wedding budget of about 3 million Naira.

But I keep asking myself one very honest question: how do I commit that kind of money to someone who hasn’t really shown the same level of effort back, even in something as small as 5k, despite earning a little?


Asin, I never smell her 5k since we started dating.


At this point, it’s not even about the money anymore. It’s about intention, balance, and simple acts of kindness.

Even on my birthday, I didn’t receive a gift from her, and that stayed with me more than I expected.

I’ve never had to deliberately test her money, because genuine care and small acts of giving usually show themselves naturally over time.

To be clear, I’ve been carrying most of the financial weight in this relationship, and there’s hardly anything tangible she has ever done for herself without at least my 50% contribution since we met.

I don’t complain, but I also don’t want to ignore what I’m seeing.

As a responsible man, I’m trying to be honest with myself before I take a step I can’t easily undo.

So I want to ask people who are married or have real experience: if I go ahead and marry in a relationship where this is the current dynamic, what should I realistically expect in marriage?

I’m not trying to assume the worst, but I also believe experience speaks louder than hope.

Just give her a simple test.

Ask her on her way back from somewhere to help you buy something. Something you know she can afford, with the excuse that your bank network is bad at the moment,that way you can't make a transfer to her.

If she keeps asking you for a reimbursement afterwards and making an issue out of it,just know say you don enter one chance.

One pastor,three women. And there are members to. That church who knows his story and still listen to his sermons.

mirrael68:
Ji

You sef be gen z?
The theme song was EDDIE QUANSA BIYA BIO....

I laughed hard when I read "Elephant Style". I was like,what is that again?😂😂😂😂

AllBlack:
Abi na GIRIN GORY be 430? check well

Zebrudaya is alias 4:30

YoungLionken:
The more African men allow women to have their way, the more trouble and unhappiness it (marriage) become for the men..

Ask majority of married men in marriage and what you will likely hear is the "omo, e nor easy.." You would think it is about taking care of family based on the economy until they begin to tell you about the tigress they married. Why are all these things happening is simply because, just like religion, African men are getting brainwashed about accepting everything (work of the devil) as normal, hence the terrible government. Same way, the poster drafted so called "10 stages" of accepting BS from your woman and accepting it as normal, I'm surprised he didn't include the "blame the devil" stage as an excuse to overlook her misbehaviour until it becomes too late (a stage where she becomes uncontrollable and that's the stage most married men are now)..

Dear African men (those with western ideology on marriage should take the backseat or leave), when it comes to women/marriage, don't accept any act of stubborn misbehaviour disguised as a "stage" or whatever comforting name they are giving it! Our forefathers married quietly, powerfully and peacefully, you should do the same. If you can't place her where she belongs (not as a slave but a woman who is under authority), then she's not yours...

You have definitely changed the entire narrative and streamlined it to look like it's all about women. It takes the two parties to make a marriage work or fail.
I know the people on Nairaland with your kind of thought line. If they have never blamed a woman for the woes of the world,they will never remain calm.

Christistruth03:
Desmond Elliott is from Olowogbowo on Lagos Island
Na Lagos indigene

It seems you don't know how theses ones discriminate against children's born to them by non-indigenous women. His mom is from cross river or akwa-ibom.
They did same to that Labour Party candidate