₦airaland Forum

michelin89:
Chill dear. All na excuse. Which kind psychological factors?? Weren't these kids going to turn out worse if the parents hadn't divorced? Damn!

A broken home doesn't necessitate divorce. You can be a victim of a broken home even as your parents choose to stay together for oblivious reasons.

Why are you people being so blind to the truths and facts?

Sisikill:
Took the words right out of my mouth ^(keyboard)

Excuses! Excuses!! Excuses!!!

Why would someone be proud of being something about which they had no choice? No-one had a choice about their skin-colour, nationality or tribe. None of these are attributes are earned by the endeavours of the individual. So why should one be proud of these attributes that are not the result of one's own endeavours?

i don't think they understand the sentences above.

michelin89:
As you said, it's an excuse and not a real factor!

Shut up. You're supposed to read a post in tota, not cut it in three and pick the one that fulfills your urge. I said some use it as an excuse. The psychological factors are there.

Sisikill:
Lawd-a-mercy!!!!

I'm too shocked to say anything!

Jeebus!

why now? Say something abeg.  And it's true that some people use this as an excuseo to carry on a pathetic way of living.  I was once around a girl who was so combative and destroyed by her broken home that anything I said to her was seen as an excuse to start a fight.

michelin89:
Mr. Arrogant, Don't step on my toe tonight!

too late. i alraedy did

RichyBlacK:
Generally, black women are good in bed but their shakara is usually not worth the mattress you want to bang her _{(though there are some incredible Nubian queens out there)}. White or Asian women will gleefully experiment with you from page 1 to page 200!

substituting condess for kool aid.

[quote author=

michelin89 link=topic=149545.msg2483552#msg2483552 date=1215624708]Rather than a broken home, I'd say a broken heart![/quote]hahahahaha that's because you don't understand the question.

gamine my dear

huxley:
Looks like a lot of people are not getting exactly the main thrust of my post. I repeat, at best the attributes cited by some poster are neutral. If they are neutral, why the fuzz about them. Let's perform the following thought experiment;

1) Which of the following peoples should be proud of themselves and why ?

a) French
b) Japanese
c) Namibians
d) Nigerians
e) Native Australians
f) Native South Americans
g) Icelanders
h) Egyptians


2) Which of the following people should NOT be proud of themselves and why ?

a) French
b) Japanese
c) Namibians
d) Nigerians
e) Native Australians
f) Native South Americans
g) Icelanders
h) Egyptians

Don't midn them. They're dull-brained.

it would be too easy to defend engineering on all facets. too easy.

Cockpitboy:
Engineers, am still with y'all. Its takes a lotta muscles and sweating out to get most of your jobs done.

yep. so much muscles even a woman can lift it.


as far as incorpation of the two, just think:
bioengineering
biomedical engineering
bioelectrical engineering
biomechanical engineering
etc

spikedcylinder:
LOL!
You people ehn!

even yahooze dey fear for karma. _{walahi talahi sumobi lai i no fit laugh}

i promise say you no go disappoint.
wait na. you go send kasali? why you no fit go. na orobo syndrome be that one. nothing my two heavy duty fully developed joysticks can't take care of.

okay how do we start. _{he be like say u for go buy credit make u take ring me. you know my number na}

huxley:
Why would someone be proud of being something about which they had no choice? No-one had a choice about their skin-colour, nationality or tribe. None of these are attributes are earned by the endeavours of the individual. So why should one be proud of these attributes that are not the result of one's own endeavours?

The notion of "proud to be" should be rightly associated with one's achievements. For instance, I am proud to be a good and diligent employee, a good friend, a good husband, a good father, a good sportsman, a good citizen. These are my achievements and am very proud of them. I am not proud to be African, no more than an Englishman should be proud of being English, a Frenchman proud of being French.

What personal successes are you proud to have achieved?

Well shit you're right. I recently had a discussion about this. I still stick with the opinion that it is a natural phenomenon.

Gamine:
Oya! Acid someone for you oh!!!

Oh God! please no.  The erected nose just bacame dejectedly limp and comatose.

Arisekola:
HOW ARE YOU ETHANOATE ION.I GUESS YOU ARE A FELLOW CHEMIST.cAN i MEET YOU

hi. i believe we just met. 

Both do enrich, but at the same tiem they drain. Mental a

nd physical drainage is no joke when it comes to these fields. There's a reason so many of y'all in these fields are constipated.

About the chemical processing statement. I wasn't going to use that to jump on the bandwagon of the engineers but I just had to point it out to her. It weakened her argument.

Kai! Na wayo be that one.  Never place that kind of value on a life.  Saying something like "only a life" is inflammatory and sick.  You don't know how valuable that life was to the family that loses it.

Gamine:
@Eldee,
Plsssss
The Streetsmart cannot do without Books.

So, you can't cancel out the Bookies

Lol _{that was a clever post. se you know the abnormal p[i]e[/i]nis getting more turned on each passing second. if only i had known you were this clever.}

nana:
I really do not believe in Karma because if Karma were to really be in existence,then people that do evil would def. reap evil. Take for example,all these murderers being arrested in UK,if a murderer ever get caught,he's just going to get a jail sentence and might even be released in few years.

Another example is all the money-squandering politicians we have in Nigeria,do they ever encounter all the bad things they do to the masses?

Though,some people havent been quite lucky with getting away with their evil deeds tho. Like they say Payback is a bitch.
Lets look at another example, What about partners that cheat in a r/ship. Some do get away with it while some don't.

Another example is a situation whereby you help someone out of a situation or sumfin out of your own free good will ,but that person turns around and stabs u.

eldee:
Well said!!!

KARMA is man's way of consoling himself for ill-luck and poor planning
Hitler killed how many millions of people, when Mr KARMA wanted to get him, what happened?
He died . . . the same way the six year old girl that was walking on the street when a gas leak exploded
The same way people in the Twin Towers died on 9/11

KARMA is just a big farce

DARN! You two have raised some really strong points here.

SENATOR JD:
yeah parents do when one was much younger,
now i dnt think my parents would make a choice on an issue am not comfortable with and i would accept. the older one gets the more wiser one should be as well(exceptions exist)
the hidden effects are there alright, but it shouldnt tell on ones future home.
i come from a home where we never really had a rapor with our dad(career person and quiet person) growing up till of late. but i promised myself that i would be involved as much as possible by God's grace in my kids growing up days.
of course like tboy said i can always justify my not being involved with my kids because such was my case can't i?

Well it contradicts what you said about the individuals getting to make the decisions themselves.  Even as adults it is not always the case.  Do arranged marriages ring a bell to you?  It could fly with you but not always with others.  We all stem from different parts of the world and experience separate customs.  The evidence is there that it tells on the future home.  It can go either way . . . your argument is logical and I agree that for the purpose of healthy living it shouldn't be allowed to tell on your future home.   As is the case currently and has always been, it tells on the home and the impact may be positive or negative, or even both. Logic isn't always enough to cure mental damage.

Gamine:
Acid + Base = Salt.

Theres some assistance.

A reaction between me acid and you base will produce salt and water. the perfect mix.

Yeah i guess you're kind of right. I have been a bit unfavorable to the positive side of it.

spikedcylinder:
I think it is more of a philosophical ideology that proposes cause and effect. Through the law of Karma, the effects of all deeds are translated into past, present and future experiences. Morally too, it is at par because it teaches that we should be resposible for our actions because each action comes with a consequence. That is common sense really isnt it?

Philosophical superstition more like. There's no theory or law that suggests that karma is nature's way of saying you screwed up; rather, we have come to accept it as a general principle that we live by.

People do bad deeds every day and this same karma fails to catch up to them. Is karma discriminatory? Those darn crooks we call our leaders in Aso Rock have been doing us dirty for decades, where is the karma to flush them out.

eldee:
C'mon all you've proven there is Law of Conservation of Mass Energy
Which says: Matter can neither be created nor destroyed

LMAO.

SENATOR JD:
who says people get stupid when they fall in love?
back to topic
its definitely in ones control, we make the choices that affects our future, so coming from a broken home means your romantic life would be affected? i dnt think so.
its all a matter of what i consider ok or not
u sure right dude, excuses just to justify actions

Unless you're a martian you should know that people do the oddest things when in love --- not all people of course.
We don't always make the choices that affect our future.  sometimes our parents make these choices for us before we ever have a chance to say "no this isn't what I want".


The hidden effects of a broken home are nothing to laugh about. It's never always as easy as "it's their choice."

Gamine:
@Acid,
Agama?

Professional psychological treatment,
omo it sounds like someone may be in big trouble!

Agama ke? No dey mind me abeg.


Let me provide you with this list of concerns I found on the net about children of divorced parents.

http://www.amazon.com/Coast-Family-Romance-Nora-Johnsondp/0743234472+brokenhomes+affect+child%27s+romance

- Teenagers in single-parent families and in blended families are three times more likely to need psychological help within a given year. (Peter Hill “Recent Advances in Selected Aspects of Adolescent Development” Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry 1993)

- Compared to children from homes disrupted by death, children from divorced homes have more psychological problems. (Robert E. Emery, Marriage, Divorce and Children’s Adjustment” Sage Publications, 1988)

That statistic is truly amazing, isn’t it? But let me continue on…here are are some more shocking statistics on the effect of divorce on children…

- Children living with both biological parents are 20 to 35 percent more physically healthy than children from broken homes. (Dawson, “Family Structure and Children’s Health and Well-being” Journal of Marriage and the Family)

- Most victims of child molestation come from single-parent households or are the children of drug ring members. (Los Angles Times 16 September 1985 The Garbage Generation)

- A Child in a female-headed home is 10 times more likely to be beaten or murdered. (The Legal Beagle, July 1984, from “The Garbage Generation”)

- The study of children six years after a parental marriage breakup revealed that even after all that time, these children tended to be “lonely, unhappy, anxious and insecure”. (Wallerstein “The Long-Term Effects of Divorce on Children” Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 1991)

- Children of divorce are four times more likely to report problems with peers and friends than children whose parents have kept their marriages intact. (Tysse, Burnett, “Moral Dilemmas of Early Adolescents of Divorced and Intact Families. Journal of Early Adolescence 1993)

- Children of divorce, particularly boys, tend to be more aggressive toward others than those children whose parents did not divorce. (Emery, “Marriage, Divorce and Children’s Adjustment, 1988)

- Children of divorce are at a greater risk to experience injury, asthma, headaches and speech defects than children whose parents have remained married. (Dawson, “Family Structure and Children’s Health and Well Being” National Health Interview Survey on Child Health, Journal of Marriage and the Family)

- People who come from broken homes are almost twice as likely to attempt suicide than those who do not come from broken homes. (Velez-Cohen, “Suicidal Behavior and Ideation in a Community Sample of Children” Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 1988)

tboy1:
not really . . . its in your control and its up to the individual if he/she want the past to creep up or if he/she want to use that experience and become a stronger person

personally it does not affect your romantic future, if it does then i'll say the person is using that as an excuse

You do know how strong and invasive human emotions can be right? Take the example of love, people know how stupid they get when they fall in love but have arguably no way to avoid the stupidity. When strong emotions become your thoughts they are all you can think about. you will live and breathe their curse. Unless you find a way to get out of it by figuring ways to seek help, or if you're fortunate enough to be surrounded by the right people you may succeed. If not it will be a tough battle to win alone. It's in your control to a certain extent I admit that.

Is this one of those laws of nature that has no systematical proof but we just practically have to accept?

Gamine:
What is Karma?

i believe in What you Sow, You will Reap

in any way possible.

Life as we know it is about give and take,
You can't transcend the laws of nature while still in Nature.

What are the laws of nature?  Provide examples and I might be able to dig up some instances where these so-called-laws have been transcended.  

Why do you believe that you will reap what you sow?  The people considered statutory rapists do not get to reap what they sowed do they?  How do you explain statutory rapists becoming registered sex-offenders while cold-blooded murderers who get released on bail get to live invisibly and without hassle as your next-door neighbors.

Gamine:
Pray tell, what pattern could this be.

My parents being seperate dosnt mean i want the same for myself
or is it somewhere embedded that i don't know about?

Agama, a lot of people don't want the same for themselves.  But what do you do if heavy depression, loneliness, daily fights are the norm in the type of family you grew up in? Those things will be the fuel that drive your interaction with others. It will take some professional psychological help to get your head set straight.