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Education › Re: Jambites Did You Noticed This??? by Chimdiebere(m): 11:27am On Mar 07, 2016

charlesucheh:
BOIZ be forming mathematicians on this thread! Instead of them to admit they failed, they're here blaming jamb... Is this place Jamb headquarters?? You all are just throwing Unnecessary tantrums like small children, don't go and think of how to construct yourselves better than the "YOU" that just failed, stay here and complain....RUBBISH....una need slap.

will you get out??!! how can you just come here and be saying rubbish?? do you know how many people jamb has frustrated and you're here talking nonsense because you made yours earlier on and you think everyone is the same?? sorry for you

Education › Re: Jambites Did You Noticed This??? by Chimdiebere(m): 11:15am On Mar 07, 2016

Masterkolinks:
JAMB is so annoying..
I killed Maths completely, as in I finished it, I was expecting not less than 85, they gave me 30.
I don't know English at all, I just guessed all through, I was expecting marks like 12,13 and they gave me 32..
The most painful part, my best subject Chemistry, I was expecting not less than 95 bkos I knew everything and I also crosschecked as soon as I finished my jamb, but they gave me 18
Then Physics, I was just expecting God to lead d way, and to my surprise, they gave me 14 making a total of 94..
And pls can I still use this result to gain admission into OAU? Or should I wait till next year bkos I'm tired of staying at home. Arrghh!! Since 2004 that I've been writing jamb..
JAMB is so annoying!!!!

honestly I dey feel your pain! 2004?? that time I was just 7yrs old, and this is my 3rd jamb I've written this yr, still no admission! chei angry

Events › 19 Kind Of People To Find On Nairaland by Chimdiebere(op): 4:46pm On Mar 04, 2016

Nairaland is a special place. It’s where you’ll find the original Nigerian mentality.
In fact, if Nigeria suddenly transforms into a website, it’ll transform to Nairaland. So it’s expected that there is a diverse range of people there.
Here are some examples:

1.The End-time Crusaders:These ones are common in Linda Ikeji’s comments and Nairaland section. So for basically every post, whether its a father-kills-son-post or a woman-buys-car story, their reply is ‘nawa ooo, End times tinz. Everybody take note’. They are very similar to the next group.

2.The Off-pointers: Everyone is talking about how Nigeria’s flag is Green and White for example,and they just come and say: ‘Nigeria has 36 states’. They are the forefathers of the next group

3.Customs/Cement People: That’s a polite way of calling them spammers. They are everywhere, on every website that fails to moderate comments. Some of them are friends with Dr Azolibe. You know him? The man always spamming our emails with penisenlargement remedies? Yup. That’s him.

4.First to Comment:No comment.Except Linda Ikeji is their fairy godmother.

5.Keyboard Warriors: These ones will go to anyone or anything they can find. They have many apples that didn’t fall far from their tree, like the next two;

6.Political Nairaland: They believe there are three types of people;APC, PDP, and "fencists". Neither of them like "fencists" because each one thinks the fencist is on the other side.

7.Tribal Nairaland:A story drops that an unknown man raped someone and the next thing you hear is, “Nawa for all these Yoruba men”. And the floodgates are open.

8.Under-G money makers: While everyone is fighting and cursing,these ones are quietly making cool cash. So once someone comments on how they need a car, or laptop, or service, these guys are ready to jump on it.

9.Men in Girl’s usernames: These ones pose as women because it helps with attention. The end goal for a huge chunk of this group is recharge card.

10.Wakapass: They just come in, read, go out.
Repeat.

11.Frontpage Overlords: These are the influencers. Any page they open makes it to front page.

12.Misogynists/Misandrists: All men are dogs: The egotistical and bitter class. It’s either they are justifying why its not the rapist’s fault because of the woman’s dressing or the other side are saying all men are dogs because one man broke her heart.

13.Intellectual: These are the honorable technocrats of Twitter. They school you on everything about the world and even your life.

14.Quote: They just quote everyone. That’s all really.

15.Nairaland haters: They are on Nairaland complaining all day about how everything, including Nairaland is horrible. But Guess who’s winning?Yep. Its Seun Osewa, founder of Nairaland

16.Sports: Cheers to the Champions League nights and the League weekends.

17.Love doctors: Oh, they are the go-to people for all that love pep-talk.

18.Patriots: They are everywhere, and have belonged with almost every category at some point or the other. Mostly, they are the reasons you have something to read every time you visit.

Lastly,

19- The Misologists- these set of people don't like any form of Argument of reasoning or anything that makes sense , but they always believe they're right always and arguing with such people will irk you a lot!

What other types of people do you know? feel free to add

Nairaland General › These Are The 18 Types Of People On Nairaland by Chimdiebere(op): 11:56am On Mar 04, 2016

Nairaland is a special place. It’s where you’ll find the original Nigerian mentality.
In fact, if Nigeria suddenly transforms into a website, it’ll transform to Nairaland. So it’s expected that there is a diverse range of people there.
Here are some examples:

1.The End-time Crusaders:These ones are common in Linda Ikeji’s comments and Nairaland section. So for basically every post, whether its a father-kills-son-post or a woman-buys-car story, their reply is ‘nawa ooo, End times tinz. Everybody take note’. They are very similar to the next group.

2.The Off-pointers: Everyone is talking about how Nigeria’s flag is Green and White for example,and they just come and say: ‘Nigeria has 36 states’. They are the forefathers of the next group

3.Customs/Cement People: That’s a polite way of calling them spammers. They are everywhere, on every website that fails to moderate comments. Some of them are friends with Dr Azolibe. You know him? The man always spamming our emails with penis enlargement remedies? Yup. That’s him.

4.First to Comment:No comment.Except Linda Ikeji is their fairy godmother.

5.Keyboard Warriors: These ones will go to anyone or anything they can find. They have many apples that didn’t fall far from their tree, like the next two;

6.Political Nairaland: They believe there are three types of people;APC, PDP, and "fencists". Neither of them like "fencists" because each one thinks the fencist is on the other side.

7.Tribal Nairaland:A story drops that an unknown man raped someone and the next thing you hear is, “Nawa for all these Yoruba men”. And the floodgates are open.

8.Under-G money makers: While everyone is fighting and cursing,these ones are quietly making cool cash. So once someone comments on how they need a car, or laptop, or service, these guys are ready to jump on it.

9.Men in Girl’s usernames: These ones pose as women because it helps with attention. The end goal for a huge chunk of this group is recharge card.

10.Wakapass: They just come in, read, go out.
Repeat.

11.Frontpage Overlords: These are the influencers. Any page they open makes it to front page.

12.Misogynists/Misandrists: All men are dogs: The egotistical and bitter class. It’s either they are justifying why its not the rapist’s fault because of the woman’s dressing or the other side are saying all men are dogs because one man broke her heart.

13.Intellectual: These are the honorable technocrats of Twitter. They school you on everything about the world and even your life.

14.Quote: They just quote everyone. That’s all really.

15.Nairaland haters: They are on Nairaland complaining all day about how everything, including Nairaland is horrible. But Guess who’s winning?Yep. Its Seun Osewa, founder of Nairaland

16.Sports: Cheers to the Champions League nights and the League weekends.

17.Love doctors: Oh, they are the go-to people for all that love pep-talk.

18.Patriots: They are everywhere, and have belonged with almost every category at some point or the other. Mostly, they are the reasons you have something to read every time you visit.

Lastly,

19- The Misologists- these set of people don't like any form of Argument of reasoning or anything that makes sense , but they always believe they're right always and arguing with such people will irk you a lot!

What other types of people do you know? feel free to add

Crime › Re: Agatu Massacre, See The Handiwork Of Fulani Herdsmen (disturbing Pictures) by Chimdiebere(m): 4:49pm On Mar 02, 2016

thank God that these Fulani men can't try nonsense in the South Eastern States like Abia or Enugu, if you dare hit or kill a Igbo person, you'll die instantly! Igbo people no dey pity Fulani at all!

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 11:45am On Mar 02, 2016

mods front page pls

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:13am On Mar 02, 2016

15. When the conductor joins your change with a stranger and the driver speeds off.Ugh! Now what?
What are your most memorable public transport experiences? Please sound off with your comments below

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:11am On Mar 02, 2016

14. When you haven’t gotten your change and your stop isnext.How is it doing this one?

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:10am On Mar 02, 2016

13. When the driver takes a different route to avoid traffic, but still gets stuck.Who sent you?

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:07am On Mar 02, 2016

12. When someone lies aboutwhere they are.A meeting, huh?

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:05am On Mar 02, 2016

11. When you’ve paid the conductor, and he says he can’t remember.Not today, Satan. Not today

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:04am On Mar 02, 2016

10. When someone tries to chat you up.Nope. Nah. Just don’t.

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:02am On Mar 02, 2016

9. When someone starts eating beside you.What is wrong with you?

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 10:01am On Mar 02, 2016

8. When someone starts advertising an all-purpose drug for just N200.Really? It’s an eye-drop and a cure for HIV? That’s cool.

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:59am On Mar 02, 2016

7. When someone gets up and starts preaching.Not now, please.

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:58am On Mar 02, 2016

6. When you notice too late that they’ve passed your busstop.Wait… What?

1 Like 1 Share

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:57am On Mar 02, 2016

5. When a stranger gets too close.Girl, you better…

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:56am On Mar 02, 2016

4. When you finally get on and the smell hits you.
Always that one person that smells like fish.

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:54am On Mar 02, 2016

3. When you hear “enter withyour change” but you only have N1000.

Travel › Re: 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:53am On Mar 02, 2016

2. When you try to get on a moving bus.

Travel › 15 funny Pictures All Nigerians Who Use Public Transport Will Immediately Get by Chimdiebere(op): 9:52am On Mar 02, 2016*

If you’ve never entered a busin Nigeria, I kinda envy and pity you at the same time. It’s definitely an experience (not a particularly great one, but an experience nonetheless).Anyway, here are just some of the things you are sure to recognize if you’re a regular like me:

1. When you’re waiting at the bus-stop, trying not to make eye contact with anyone.

Romance › Re: The Disadvantages Of Marrying A Virgin. by Chimdiebere(m): 6:38am On Mar 01, 2016

OK, marrying a virgin is good no doubt, but not for my kind! Do you think virgins will like to have Rough sex with you! you think they like Anal? so pls get on with that! Am a kinda person who likes having rough sex and my girl doesn't seem to complain about it!

2 Likes

Politics › Re: Petrol Price In Saudi Arabia: Can Nigeria Go This Far? by Chimdiebere(m): 7:14pm On Feb 29, 2016

NovusHomo:
Nigeria could go farther than this if you all will stop your money-wasting pilgrimages to all those foreign places. Your trips to the so called holy nonsense only contribute to the economies of those countries but depletes Nigeria's foreign reserve. Stay home!

na lie! Fire burn humanity! Which kin develop? Abeg I wan emigrate go Germany! Naija that kills people's dream anyhow

Politics › Re: Petrol Price In Saudi Arabia: Can Nigeria Go This Far? by Chimdiebere(m): 7:09pm On Feb 29, 2016

190:
which Nigeria

The same sheeethole

That empty shell of a country

The one where the president or past presidents do not have degrees to their names

The same Nigeria that is 3 steps from Hell fire

Make una stay there dey deceive unaselves

na from una mama belle una begin nurse hope

Una never tire

Crucifixion of Naija

Romance › Re: Valentine Dick Special by Chimdiebere(m): 11:44pm On Feb 21, 2016

it's OK abeg! Wetin!

Business › Re: The Typical Nigerian Attitude To Foreign Goods And The Dollar Slide. by Chimdiebere(m): 10:34pm On Feb 21, 2016

if you really want made in Nigeria, then lets stop importing food stuffs, prepare to see scarcity of Okporoko in the market! Stock fish doesn't grow in Nigeria because our weather no send at all!

Romance › Re: Lady Breaks A Guy's Head For Touching Her ( Just Happening In Lagos ) by Chimdiebere(m): 12:23pm On Feb 21, 2016

toposi4naija:
The quy sev dull..........a lady for dah marra!!!!!.......I qo beat her purple n' red

that one small na,if na me I go kill am there and then, highest them go charge me for murder and I'll tell them I did that in self defense too

Romance › Re: Lady Breaks A Guy's Head For Touching Her ( Just Happening In Lagos ) by Chimdiebere(m): 12:14pm On Feb 21, 2016

Good thing I've learnt the art of "Ningendo" , no woman can try this with me without being paralyzed! Vuahahahaha! had it been it was Europe or even China, police for don carry this woman since! Further more, you shouldn't just break his head because he touched you, of course try this with a Calabar boy and face the consequences! them go plan for you well!

Business › Re: Dollar Scarcity: Parents Of Overseas Students Weep In Banks by Chimdiebere(m): 4:52pm On Feb 20, 2016

If I may ask, how many times have you ever seen Foreign students from the Americas, Europe, Asia And the Middle east come to Nigeria to study?? how many times?? You think they don't know how Kpfucked up Nigeria is?? or you think that they don't have any knowledge of how Nigeria looks like huh? if possible, tell me any foreigner you know that schools in your public or private university and I'll know that you're just lying! even if you manage to see them, they won't be staying long as you think. but yet, tell me the number of doctors that have emigrated from our country and the bright brains from Nigeria that live abroad and you'll see that this unfriendly land is a limitation indeed! Naija used to be one of the best places in the world during the '60's but now it has almost become a $#!T hole ! can you imagine? Anyways, I want to emigrate to! Naija isn't helping me to actualize my dreams and passion here! ( Gehen Deutscheland!)

Business › Re: Dollar Scarcity: Parents Of Overseas Students Weep In Banks by Chimdiebere(m): 10:51am On Feb 20, 2016

achodave:
If the government wants to stop Nigerian students from going abroad to study,they should scrap JAMB and create better admission opportunities and processes here,why cause JAMB is more of a business than an admission body,if they want the ones overseas to come back and school here in Nigeria,then they should order Universities to startup functional transfer programs so the ones overseas can easily continue from whatever level they stopped over there.

Saying they should stop wasting there time crying and come back to Nigeria just like that is not fair,especially to the average families who are doing there best to train there ward abroad so he or she studies the discipline he wants probably because here in Nigeria they either deny your admission or change your course.So let's be open minded before we start abusing them.

Business › Re: Dollar Scarcity: Parents Of Overseas Students Weep In Banks by Chimdiebere(m): 10:50am On Feb 20, 2016

achodave:
If the government wants to stop Nigerian students from going abroad to study,they should scrap JAMB and create better admission opportunities and processes here,why cause JAMB is more of a business than an admission body,if they want the ones overseas to come back and school here in Nigeria,then they should order Universities to startup functional transfer programs so the ones overseas can easily continue from whatever level they stopped over there.

Saying they should stop wasting there time crying and come back to Nigeria just like that is not fair,especially to the average families who are doing there best to train there ward abroad so he or she studies the discipline he wants probably because here in Nigeria they either deny your admission or change your course.So let's be open minded before we start abusing them.

exactly! you just took the words out of my mouth! I was already planning to apply for German visa to go abroad! Naija is truly bleeped up indeed! seeking admission since 2014! is that fair??

3 Likes

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