₦airaland Forum

Even though I was born in UK and lived the great majority of my life in UK, I have been to Nigeria and lived there and so I know what i saw with my own eyes. A pretty girl can't walk down the road and go to the market without men grabbing and pulling one part of her body or the other - the poor girl has no police to turn to

And then those same bush men get visas to come into UK and try that rubbish on the women over here. Thank God for British police. He de show una pepper

Come and try your ikebe grabbing nonsense over here in UK and see what Oyinbo police will do to you

Nigerians are very sensitive. They don't take criticism well and respond with insults and abuse.

Oh well, the truth is bitter - the whole world can't be wrong about you

Kenny_G:
wrong, I wasnt born in nigeria

But were you raised there. It's where you were raised that matters. A Nigerian raised man is something ALL WOMEN SHOULD RUN FROM!!

Dyt:
Dis babe dey fex o
shuuu
cos of throat grabbin 4rm behind
my head o
i don die 4 nl
its funny cos m imaginin d scene
its so so hillarious

And therein lies the difference between Nigerians and the rest of the world.
Nigerians find what he did to me (grabbing my throat) funny - but all other nationalities find it shocking
There is something wrong with you people of Nigeria - your standards of decency are abysmally low. No wonder Obama won't set foot in that country!

Kenny_G:
me sef i have placed my hands on a white chic's thigh in emmmmm where is this place again? emmmmm

I hope you did not proceed to stand behind her and grab her by the throat. I know what you nigerian born men can be like. So indisciplined and with absolutely no respect for boundaries.

lizzybabe1:
A white man has placed his hand on my thigh before, in Leeds. I suppose ALL British men too can't behave themselves and there is no law enforcement in UK and the rule of law is virtually non-existent? Blah Blah Blah.

Did he grab your throat a few weeks later?
Somehow I doubt it.

Another very good example of N.M.L (Nigerian Male Lawlessness)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1231144/Drug-smuggler-swallows-67-packages-cocaine-bid-past-customs.html

I don't associate with raf raff any more. It was really easy to keep away from rif raff once I identified who the rif raf were.

hakon:
which one is more dangerous : throat grabbing or a man introducing a foreign object inside your body. the young man was only trying his luck with u. you should have politely explained to him that you dont like him that much to move into the next level. spiritual conji fit catch u one day and u will make a pass at a man in a way that might seem right to u but offensive to the man. if the Man aggressively rejects you the way u rejected the naija bros that was in need of something u had hope u will not be offended. throat grabbing is still romatic to some chics.

Actually throat grabbing is extremley dangerous as well as scary especially if the person's throat is grabbed from behind. There is nothing romantic about throat grabbing - it is very dangerousand illegal.
Any woman who is chatted up/approached by a man in that sort of way should see it for the RED FLAG that it is!!!

I have my own opinions as to why Nigerian raised males behave this way. It is because in Nigeria, there is no law enforcement/ police presence and the rule of law is virtually non existent. As a result, most nigerian males grow up with no fear of the consequences of breaking the law. The lawbreaking behaviour becomes entrenched.

They then come over to UK with that lawless behaviour and they quickly receive a rude awakening from the British bobby (aka police).

The root of the problem lies in the culture of male lawlessness prevalent in Nigeria which itself is caused by the absence of effective law enforcemnt in Nigeria.

There is no rule of law in Nigeria.
A lawless country produces a lawless people - especially in the males. (Females are naturally better at self-monitoring and self-restraint).

tpia@:
^^are these guys you mention the same way with foreign women?

i'm asking because there have been a lot of comments saying nigerian women are too standoffish with nigerian men, hence the men say they find non-nigerian women easier to approach.

this throat-grabbing guy: does he also grab the throats of non-nigerian girls and if yes, how do they react when he does that.

slap their thighs? Do they like it and encourage him?

just curious because i really dont understand what's going on.

I don't know what the throat grabbing guy is doing now as I have sinced moved on to another better paying job and left him behind. So if he is grabbing the white girls' throats, goodluck to him because I know they will have him arrested fast. They will not have the same sense of loyalty that stopped me from getting him arrested/fired.

Look at that doctor who sexually harassed the white nurses - they had him out of there in 2 hours flat!

Here are some more examples of Nigerian raised doctors who have overstepped the boundaries.

A Nigerian doctor who fondled his female patients.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1544304/Doctor-who-fondled-female-patient-will-not-be-struck-off-GMC-rules.html

A Nigerian doctor who fathered a secret lovechild with his patient
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-495000/Nigerian-doctor-fathered-secret-love-child-patient.html

A Nigerian doctor who sexually assaulted his female patient
http://www.africamasterweb.com/AdSense/NigerianDoctor20YrsRapeUS.html


And on and on it goes.
I'm sure you can see a pattern here - This is not coincidence

NIGERIAN BORN MEN HAVE NO SENSE OF BOUNDARIES!
THEY SIMPLY DO NOT KNOW HOW TO CONDUCT THEMSELVES APPROPRIATELY!!!

I'm sorry but I don't think I am generalising.
I have noticed this problem with more than one Nigerian raised male. It is also obvious to other British born Nigerian girls, not just to me. In the end I had to decide not to associate any more with Naija raised males because I don't need that grief.

Tpia - you are absolutely correct. Throat grabbing is very dangerous. he seemed to think it was funny/playful but I don't see it that way. If I had called the police, no doubt he would have been in serious trouble.

My point is that Nigerian born males just don't seem to know where the boundaries of appropriate behaviour lie. Always overstepping the boundaries

As a British born Nigerian woman, I have tried to be friendly with Nigerian born Naija men who came over to settle here in the UK as adults but I have to say it is not easy. I have noticed that they (Nigerian raised men) do not know how to conduct themselves and they are constantly overstepping the boundaries - all in the name of being friendly. For example in my previous job, there was a Nigerian male (Nigerian born and raised) who joined our team and I was friendly with him and tried to show him the ropes. I think he misconstrued my friendliness and tried to make more out of it than it was - but I was not interested. One day, when we were having a conversation, he playfully tapped his fist on my thigh which I was not happy about but I did not say anything. The real shocker came a few weeks later when I was sitting at my desk in the office talking to one of my female colleagues who was sitting beside me. The Nigerian male came and stood behind me and was joining in our conversation which I did not mind. Then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, he grabbed my throat from behind - wrapped his hands round my throat and started strangling me playfully. I was really shocked and screamed at him to get off which he did at once. But what shocked me was that he would even dare to do such a thing in the first place. He did not seem to realise that it is totally unacceptable to grab a person by the throat - especially from behind. He was very lucky that I did not report him or else he could have been sacked and arrested but I chose not to report him.

I have noticed this problem with almost all the Nigerian males who were raised in Nigeria - not the ones raised in UK - they are much more refined. As a result, I no longer associate with Nigerian males raised in Naija. as they seem to have no sense of propriety and not a clue about the correct way to conduct themselves.

So my question is this: Why don't Nigerian men (the ones raised in Nigeria) know how to conduct themselves appropriately?
In case you think it's just me who has noticed this have a look at this newspaper article about a Nigerian doctor who graduated from medical school at University of Ibadan and came over to UK. He was working in a UK hospital and managed to get himself sacked within 2 hours of starting the job.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/8151740/Doctor-suspended-for-sexually-harassing-two-nurses-on-first-days-at-work.html

Men want the bed too quickly
Women want to wed too quickly

She is pressuring you for marriage becos she gave you her thing, now she wants the ring.
If you are not prepared to wed her, then why did you bed her?

Give her the ring or stop taking her thing.

PUT A RING ON IT!!!

Npoto:
The Ikwerre man says he is not an Igbo man only when he is in Rivers state. See him any other place, he claims to be an igbo man. I live here in Rivers state and seeing the general attitude of the Ikwerres ,I am of the opinion that they are not Igbos. Parts of these are their lazy attitude to work and the rate they sell their lands without regards for their coming generations. (Igbo man rarely sells a land inherited from his father)

You can't really blame him for that - considering all the difficulties they have put him through in Rivers state. He is simply trying to survive in an environment surrounded by hostilities.

But why does it have to be a civil war? Why can't it be a peaceful referendum where the people get to determine their own destiny without a single drop of blood shed. It worked for Czechoslovakia and the Soviet union. Why does Nigeria have to be so violent about everything?

netotse:
i voted no, seeing as the OP is female, she herself lends credence to that option.

you claimed a female could:
none of the things i emboldened(or whatever the english is) can happen in 24months.

i wonder what you were thinking of when you typed all those things. . .if you want to make a case for a female presidency, dont you think making irrational statements hurts your campaign?

OH YES WE CAN. It is that typically defeatist male pessimism that has held Nigeria back for 50 yrs. Electricity, water, telephone, roads etc can all be done within the given time frame.

It's called MULTI-TASKING! Something men know very little about

sjeezy8:
lol - what are you talking about I dont know any sensible person that can live without Oil products-

isnt that what we put in our cars? or you want to walk everywhere
isnt it what we use for airplanes- or you want to swim to yankee abi? lol
isnt it what we use for generators?
isnt that what we use for the Roads (heavy crude Oil)?

I am not talking about oil products - everyone in the world has some type of oil product in the house (vaseline), kitchen (plastic bags and containers), car tank(petrol) or something.
I am talking about the obsession with crude oil - the obsessive belief that crude oil is the one and only means of econominc viability.
How does Japan, Singapore, south korea and other non-oil producing countries do it?

sjeezy8:
When I meet people from Ethiopia, Somalia Sierre leone, Liberia, Zimbabwe, Gambia,Even India, China etc (other crazy 3rd world countries) -I tanx God im from Nigeria. those countries no even get Oil and are still 1 million times worse than Nigeria.

Here we go with the Oil again.
Can you not think outside of oil just for 2 minutes
Oil - the false god of Nigeria. The fixtaion/obsession is frightening.

You are missing the whole point - it is not just the electricity but what you can do with it. It gives you light to see, air-conditioning to make you comfortable in a hot country, you can use appliances, start businesses, run factories, create jobs, improve the economy

I HATE CRUDE OIL - IT IS THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO NIGERIANS

Nigerians are no longer able to consider any possibilities for themselves outside the sphere of crude oil - it has completely narrowed their horizon and obliterated their problem solving thinking. They have made it their idol - it is a form of idolatry. They have fought wars for it, killed each other because of it and are still fighting for control over it till this very day.

You would think crude oil is the only way for a country to make a living and acquire national earnings - how did dry-as-a-bone Japan and post-stamp-sized Singapore make their wealth? There are so many other posibilities regarding how to make money outside of crude oil but Nigerians can't see it - and refuse to see it - all they can see, think, eat, sleep and drink is crude oil, crude oil, crude oil.

STOP BEING SO BLIND - CRUDE OIL IS NOT THE BE ALL AND END ALL FOR CREATING NATIONAL WEALTH

For those Nigerians in the diaspora, what would persuade you to return to live in Nigeria? For me it would be:

Good Health Service
Low Crime
Good Roads
Good Economy (this cannot be achieved until Nigeria has Full time electricity, running water and telecommunications)

How about you - what would persuade you to return? Have I missed out anything?
I deliberately left out "jobs" and "good economy" from the poll because that is too easy an answer to give and I want people to think deeper than that.

yes, woman president.
It is the only way to repair Nigeria.
Men are just afraid that once Nigeria has had a woman president and enjoyed a drastic improvement in the country's standards, the people will not be willing to suffer a decline back to the bad old days of male rule - and they may never ever again vote for another man. This is what men fear.

cap28:
if you only knew what would lie in store for you once your "dream" of balkanisation took place you would recoil in horror.

A horror worse than what we have now? I'll take my chances thank you!

A BATTERED WIFE NEVER REGRETS LEAVING HER HUSBAND!

cap28:
Thanks for getting back to me with some really intelligent points

Intelligent enough.
I think you catch my drift

Nigerian men have shown themselves to be a lost and hopeless cause with only concerns for lining their pockets and fattening their swiss bank accounts.
A Nigerian women President would use her female common sense to put Nigeria in sharp order quickly with some basic house keeping rules that any humble wife would tell you.

1) FULLTIME ELECTRIFICATION OF NIGERIA - WITHIN 24 MONTHS.
2) FULL TIME RUNNING WATER FOR ALL NIGERIA WITHIN - 36 MONTHS
3) FULL TIME TELEPHONE COMMUNICATIONS WITHIN NIGERIA - WITHIN 24 MONTHS.
4) ROAD SIGNAGE AND IMPROVEMENTS THROUGHOUT NIGERIA TO PREVENT TRAFFIC ACCIDENTS - WITHIN 24 MONTHS.
5) COMPREHENSIVE UNIVERSAL HEALTH SERVICE WITHIN NIGERIA - WITHIN 24 MONTHS.

How would she do this - simple
Ungag the media  - bring in government transparency legislation. Give the media free reign to investigate, name and shame all corrupt officials.

If public officials become too afraid to embezzle and take bribes you would be amazed what can be provided for the people with all that oil money.


A FREE AND RUBUST PRESS IS THE ENEMY OF CORRUPTION.

Dreamers are the greatest achievers - they refuse to be told they have limitations!

Everything is the White man's fault.

If I fail my exams - blame the Whiteman
if I drink-drive and kill someone - blame the whiteman
If I gamble away my money and can't pay my rent - blame the whiteman.
If I don't brush my teeth and get tooth decay - blame the whiteman

BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN! BLAME THE WHITE MAN!

CILondon:
Over the last 40 years our government should have invested time and resources into developing Nigeria as a major manufacturing exporter and a major agricultural exporter as well as a robust service sector.
Instead they have wasted 40 years squabbling and fighting over oil. What a waste!

The Biafrans wouldn't have done that.
If Biafra had suceeded, today "igbo made goods" would be on a par with Japanese goods.
Don't forget that when the Japanese started their manufacturing in the 195os and 60s, nobody wanted to buy their products. My mother tells me that people shunned their goods because they used to breakdown so easily - so much so that anything that broke down quickly was automatically referred to as "Fabrique eu Japan"
Now look at them.
That's exactly how it would have been for the Igbo made goods of Biafra - rubbish at first, but excellent in the end because a Biafran government would have been willing to devote the resources, research and development into making Biafran made goods the best.

Seun:
Crude Oil is the most likely glue that holds Nigeria together. The Northern and South-Western elements of the country cannot seriously consider the possibility of breaking away from the South-Eartern and South-South simply because we cannot do without their oil. For this reason, any attempt by any region of the country to break away and take the south-south with them will not be treated with kid gloves at all. Without their oil, poverty is surely going to engulf the rest of the country!

If it's not crude oil, then it must be cowardice. Nigerians like to talk tough but nobody wants to die! And you know what? This is a good thing, because human life is very precious, and once you lose it you can't get it back. There's no point in wasting lives breaking away from a democratic state when it is quite likely that the new state you'll be creating will be under military rule for an indefinite period of time. I (a yoruba) prefer a Hausa-headed democracy to a Yoruba dictatorship!

Seun, you are wrong - there is plenty of crude oil in Yoruba land. I am quite sure of it. You don't need our oil.
Anyway, why this Nigerian obsession with crude oil? What did Nigerians use to live on before crude oil was discovered in 1955 or whenever - and the economy was a lot better in those days according to my mother.
JAPAN AND SINGAPORE DO NOT HAVE A DROP OF CRUDE OIL IN THEIR COUNTRY - AND LOOK AT THEM TODAY! SINGAPORE GOT IT'S INDEPENDENCE FROM BRITAIN IN 1963 - THREE YRS AFTER NIGERIA AND YET IT HAS LEFT NIGERIA WAY BEHIND!

Crude Oil is the curse of Nigeria's development - because of it we have stopped looking for other ways to develop and advance our economy and that is why we are stagnating.

Do not forget that with the advent of Green economics, crude oil is rapidly losing its appeal with consumers and the demand for crude oil will diminish over the next 10/20 years as China and USA continue to develop alternative sources of green energy.
Where will that leave Nigeria and its precious crude oil then?

Over the last 40 years our government should have invested time and resources into developing Nigeria as a major manufacturing exporter and a major agricultural exporter as well as a robust service sector.
Instead they have wasted 40 years squabbling and fighting over oil. What a waste!

Dede1:
The talk of referendum in 1967 eastern region borders on disingenuous and outright naiveté. The pogrom that took place in northern region was targeted against non-northerners in general and easterner in particular. The stories from the half-dead returnees dotted entire landscape of eastern region and they engendered unforeseen emotions.

It is wise to accuse Ojukwu of certain issues concerning how the war was handled but referendum is certainly not one of them. The government of eastern region was stacked up with the faces across ethnic groups that makeup the region. It must be recalled that it was an Ijo son from Yenegoa that gave the eastern region the name “Biafra”. Many Ijo boys from prominent families in the Ijo land fought the war on the Biafran side till the bitter end.

If Biafra had won the war, this cry of referendum or lack thereof would not have surfaced rather Ijo would have rightfully claimed the position of the Pastor that baptized the nascent country.

Some Ijaws were in favour of Biafra and some were against it. It was therefore wrong to try and force all of them into Biafra without first seeking their wishes in the ballot box.


But the most important point of all, which you overlook is this:
WITH THE BACKING OF THE BALLOT BOX, OJUKWU AND BIAFRA WOULD HAVE BEEN UNTOUCHABLE. GOWON WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO FIGHT IT WITHOUT SEVERE CRITICISM FROM THE WESTERN POWERS AND BRITAIN WOULD CERTAINLY NOT HAVE ASSISTED GOWON WITH ANY MILITARY EQUIPMENT.

Nobody wants to be seen as the enemy of democracy!