Daeylar:
Some mothers suffered domestic violence and they stayed just to keep a miserable worthless home is what you to preaching for her?


How can a sane human being see enduring domestic Violence in marriage just to keep a godforsaken home as a good thing. And take it a step further by trying to use it to preach to a woman as a reason to keep a home?

Very Sadistic


I can see happiness doesn't matter to you, keeping the home at the expense of your mental and physical health is the most important thing to you.

And you even think you can pick and choose what woman can cross your path?.

Mtcheewww

May no woman ever cross your path until you change this miserable mindset.
Rubbish.

[s][/s]

That's what built our civilisation.

1) It's not that women chose to stay it's that they had no choice. The same went for men. They were shamed to stay in marriages that they no longer wanted to be in. That's how generations of children are raised. Not all homes were bad.


2) Not all domestic violence were perpetrated by men. It's a fact that most domestic violence is actually committed by women. Spitting, slapping, temper tantrums, throwing things, not to speak of emotional abuse. It's just that men are much stronger than women. So when they do it everyone talks about it. Can you imagine a man going to the police because his wife slapped him.

3) Happiness happiness happiness. Women will never be happy. The biggest problems with marriages the world over are a womans happiness. Women are happy for all but 2 minutes and then theyre unhappy again. #happy is literally on every other female insta post. All women want is happiness but they don't realise they'll never ever find it.

OP you've been watching too many Disney movies. Like one too many women do these days. You believe in prince charming.

Marriage has never really been about love and your happiness. It's about rearing children That's why these days most marriages fail. Your expectations are all wrong. Not to say you shouldn't be happy etc but one needs to balance that with being content with what one already has.

Not easy finding a good partner in life and...

You sound like you're with a very good guy.

If your sex life sucks. Perhaps talk to him about it. Perhaps try get some 3rd party help in that department if it's impacting your life.

Or you could just leave. Most women initiate divorce around the world. Usually because they're 'unhappy'.

Women and happiness. Boggles my mind. Never happy for long that's all I know. No matter what you do as a man. Keep having to feed a womens happiness meter. Extremely tiring I must say.

Marriage is mostly dead.

I

OP I hope your boss isn't a Nairaland reader. He'll know your entire plan.

Also 2000 Euros. Where did this sec get 2000 Euros from. That's almost a million naira just to keep you quiet. She's either f@#$*&^ alot of men or she's making a big salary.

This is what happens when you enter the bed with a crazy woman. She will make your life hell.

The Pastor is a dirty old man. We all know Pastor's in Nigeria are frauds. I believe her when she talks about threesomes.

This is very funny. Let's see how it all develops.

Cire80:
We have this same markings in Ika culture and there are a few people alive that still bear this mark. It's called Igu markings in Ika area.

That's great. I wish someone would document them with photographs as it won't take long for those alive to die out and then we'll be left with none.

Visual records are much better for future generations. I guess not enough people are interested in things like that these days.

chriskosherbal:
yes I think we still have a couple of them alive, in thick villages and remote areas of the great Bini kingdom, and maybe you may also find some in the great palace of the great Oba of Bini....but I doubt if you can find them on the internet.. You may try .

Ok thanks.

In the olden days they were actual scars done with blades or some kind of knives but because of modernity and development they are now just some kind of black Pencil sketches but that does not mean that some people do not involve in blade and knives sketches.

Are there people still alive with the scars from blades? Any pics anywhere can't find any online.

I'm currently reading a book on the history of Obas in Benin Kingdom. It got me fascinated. Especially the stories focussed on the origins of iwu.

OP:

Are these tatoos? or are they actual scars done with a blade of some sort?

MKX ON PS4 Naija peeps add me up for some private matches online

My PSN is: rebelsofthesky

I've had over 500 matches online. I play only after 6 o clock as it becomes lag free then.

I think people should post their PSN so we can add each other up for some fights.

peace out.

YES, i can't wait for this game. It's a day one purchase for my PS4 to add to my growing collection of games.

I think I'm going to main Erron Black and/or Ferra Torr, and will have Jacqueline and ermac as my 2nds. I think I'll stay clear of the ninjas in this game, so no reptile or scorpion.

Can't wait.

Abu Mikey

just Want To Know If Am UGLY

SMH.....



Abu Mikey, are you just after the small temporary rush of dopamine you'll get when someone clicks 'like', or says something nice.

What is it with people these days... and their attention seeking behaviour. Are you bored? Fishing for compliments because there's some kinda of void within you that needs to be filled? Did your family not show you love? Are you insecure and constantly seeking approval? I ask not to mock I genuinely want to know. Do you think you're ugly?

When did we become a nation of narcissists?

50calibre

PREMISE

What you have to understand is that gold diggers are usually from poor families, girls with good backgrounds and from average or rich families aren't gold diggers because they tend to have seen it all.

It's hard to say that though as it's hard to know the motive for marrying someone (unless you can read minds).

Most people marry into their own social economic group I.e. the rich marry the rich, middle the middle, the poor the poor etc. So when you do get a rich person marry a poor person, is it just for the money? A gold digger is when money is the motivating factor. A very old rich guy/girl of 60 marrying a poorer guy/girl of 20 (probably a gold digger)... if they're the same age group then, who knows maybe there's love there.

But it's usually easy to spot if you're dating a gold digger.... you can tell by what sort of demands you get and how they act with money.

Docii001

This is actually the problem 'naija' women have. You hear your mothers,gfs,sisters talk about dictatorship and hence men are dictators. Actually the matter is deeper than you think and you look at it. Ask yourself this question....what thought dominates your mind?
For me I'm constantly(obsessively) thinking on ways to make it financially,get into positions of authority and same goes for a lot of guys my age....you hardly see this in girls of same age.
I ask myself why a lot of girls even the ones who swore they can never date a 'Yahoo boy' 2years ago are now comfortable in the passenger seats,go through the harshest of emotional traumas all for peanuts. Why don't they do the 'yahoo' themselves and save themselves the stress(emotionally and sexually).
The truth is God designed man and woman to coexist in love,dependent on each other but fact is God also designed man to be in charge. Women who understand this will find peace instead of constantly fighting with an imaginary 'Adolf hitler'. I won't make any comparisons but the fact is a lot of Nigerian women lack this understanding due to over exposure to American culture(which is dirty and without moral foundations). Do you want a husband who splits all the bills equally with you i.e from school fees to gas money(in the name of gender equality). Right from a young age girls are sheltered from a lot of things and the boys pushed forward(carrying heavy objects,receiving lesser pocket money). Fact is guys do or are made to do a lot of things to please the woman;right from courting and even going into marriage take up a lot of responsibilities without complain. In this light I think massaging our egos isn't too much to do on the woman's part. Women have a privileged role in a home and that's why even though I have a wonderful Dad I still get along more and adore my mum a whole lot which is the same almost everywhere,so I wonder if not for selfishness why you still try to rub shoulders with a man all in the name of not being dictated to-paranoia! There's nothing equal about the genders;anatomically,naturally and even morally.

As opposed to what? Nigerian/African culture, Asian culture, European Culture....?

I think materialism and the poor state of the education system has damaged the whole culture of family in Naija. How many graduates do we have in Nigeria? How many of these so called graduates would have graduated had they taken their exams in a university in say, London.

I studied at an arts university in America, and found that many of my peers were very left leaning in ideology and politics... They tended to have strong ideological views and saw excessive wealth or excessive displays of wealth as gratuitous. In Nigeria, it's difficult to find people with that kind of mentality. Most people want to flaunt and most see excess wealth as the goal.

Whether it's a good thing or a bad thing, I don't know, but it sure is the reason why everyone seems to be so damn materialistic. Men and Women.

Orikinla:

Poor girls are not the best girls to date in Nigeria.

Problem is the vast majority of girls in Naija are poor (vast majority of people actually).

I've spent on my GF.
So far: a blackberry, an iphone, Clothes, shoes, brazilian hair, airtime, food shopping, restaurants, toiletries, cinema outings, beach outings.......

I go to the cinema and eat out regularly so don't mind bringing her along.

The other stuff I brought her because I wanted to do it and I was happy to make her happy. I assure you she's asked me for more things and I've flat out said no..... or I'll tell her she'll have to wait till I'm ready to get it.

Is it good for our relationship... I dunno, probably not... but she doesn't have money, and I do.... I once asked her would she still be with me if i didn't have money she said of course she would.... I believed her, and I'm sure she believed it was true.... but in reality, I would probably eventually lose her to someone else.

Lol. We have this in common. I don't think I can commit myself to any lady, I'm not just cut out for the whole lovey-dovey thing. I've had many dreams about my future but I've never been married in any, and trust me I'm straighter than most straight guys.

Well firstly thanks for letting us all know just how NOT GAY you are..... but I'm guessing you and OP simply haven't found a girl you liked enough or perhaps there's something stopping you from trying to get to know a girl you find attractive. Like the fear of being hurt.

I was there, her performance was terrible. didn't sing a word just danced some routines and left the stage. When the real artists came on stage they brought the house down.

Someone explain to me, I still don't quite understand how Jesus died for us or me.

If the only way for you two to speak is for you to call cos the other party never calls first.

then you may need to think twice

all4naija: ]That is not practically true. Movies industry upgrade their technology with most movies as the effects and quality of the movies really matter, as they are going to be put into different formats. From imax to ultra high definition video formats which most music video(they are usually done by 'independent film')

No no no no.

Granted most music videos are shot on Red Camera or the Alexa (or a comparable digital camera by sony or panasonic) here's a small list of Hollywood films shot on the Red camera (the same fucking camera we use here in Nigeria to shoot music vids):

thor, flight, get the gringo, parker, prometheus, the amazing spider man, magic mike, underworld awakening, lol, haywire, red state, margin call, pirates of the carribean, the social network, district 9, green zone, book of eli, and che to name just a few.

here's a very long list of films shot on red:
http://www.red.com/shot-on-red

Here's another very long list of films shot on the all the above cameras I mentioned including the alexa which is very popular on music vids:
[url] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_films_shot_in_digital[/url]

Post Production is a different process from production. Most movies nowadays produce *'cheaper' DCPs (digital cinema packages). Imax films are not shot on Imax cameras because they're too expensive and very noisy on set which would ruin the sound. The dark knight rises only shot the action scenes on the imax camera all those other films you see in imax, have been retrograded to super 35mm and basically enlarged and stretched to fill a large part of the screen....(never the whole screen, if you notice films like the watchmen and harry potter screened on the imax screen only fill half the screen because they haven't been shot on the required 70mm) like a helluva lot of 3D films aren't shot on 3D cameras, they're retrograded in post production to 3D, so they can charge you more money at the cinema.

The production processes of music vids and films are very much the same in terms of the technology and talent used.
And ultra high definition are 4k television screens/ next gen televisions. or UHDTV. Judging by the way you threw that term in there I'm not sure you know that.


*no longer need to print to expensive 35mm film as most cinemas around the world including nigeria have digital projectors and no longer project using film.

I think you are just trying to play around with that. The best technology in video shooting and productions are used in the movies industry to produce the high quality movies. These are films with vast intensive production processes that gulp millions of dollars on equipment(Hollywood would come to mind). The music videos are cheap and rudimentary. There are no high budget plans put into such production, the reason the quality is usually poor and can be done by anybody with regular video cameras.

If you have visited movies studios before you would know what I am talking about. Many music videos are sometime awarded to some section of the movies production team,they will not put serious effort into them as movies. Music videos are not usually the high end budge production section of any the movie studio.

What do you mean by the "quality is usually poor". Technically? Conceptually

The budgets are relative. Most Hollywood budgets go towards marketing and paying star actors. The equipments usually the same as that on a music vid. Slumdog Millionaire for example has sequences that were shot entirely on the 5D. You wouldn't know.

There are some absolutely great music vids and music vid directors working and creating some of the best concepts in the moving image medium. See: Romain Gavras, martin de thurah, the DANIELS....

VillageBoi: Till today 'Festen (The celebration)' is one of my favourite films.

^^
It's a classic example of great screenwriting. Shows what you can do when shooting on even a 'rubbish' camera. 'Mifune's last song' and 'the idiots' are also brilliant dogme films.

I can sit down with my 7 yr old nephew and watch any Pixar film be it Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Cars, Up, Wall e, and we can both really enjoy them because the stories are just excellent on every level.

I'd love to see a City of God style movie made in the Lagos slums. A good Nigerian crime film, with the same socio political/historical subtext. Do we have the craftsmen and technicians to weave such a tale as expertly as the city of god: not yet. But am sure in time we will. I mean Phone Swap is a huge improvement on the unwatchable rubbish on African Magic.

Sleekymag: I beg to differ. Well there maybe very few world class Nigerian screenwriters, but how can such scripts be produced or even come alive when we also need other world-class facilities. The thing is are there world-class directors, with world-class studio facilities, world-class equipment, and world-class crew and cast, backed by world-class producers, with world-class funds needed to produce these movies (a typical low budget Hollywood film cost a few million dollars). How long do you think a Nollywood producer can hold a supposed A-list actor for? How long does it take to do preproduction, actual shooting days, and post-production? And now the big question is, is there economic sense in investing such amount of money into such productions? What is the return on investment? How many people go to the cinemas to see nollywood films? How much of theatrical distribution income and non-theatrical distribution income would guarantee smiles on the faces of such investors? These should be the real questions, i think.

I focus on the role of screenwriter because a good film can never arise from a bad script. Although you do make some valid points about the other roles which I feel (and hope) will progress naturally from better writing.

The budget constraints aspect of your argument i don't see as significant. I believe phone swap had a $500,000 budget... this is clearly relative to the $1-5m low budget indie American film (nb no country in the world can compete with Hollywood's high end $100-300m budgets). I believe budgets will grow in relation to the ability to sell films to the public i.e. *state of the art cinemas, better tv deals etc etc.

* infrastructures a concern, but according to ben bruce, films makers in nigeria will in the near future be multi millionaires.

Another point of concern is the fact that very few people working in the Nigerian industry are actual students of cinema (as their peers are abroad). How many aspiring directors/screenwriters can say they've watched films prior to 1970 or the films of the great European, Asian, African, and American film makers before them. How many know the films of Ray, Welles, Kurosawa, Kubrick, Bergman, Ossie Davis to name a few.

nigerian music vids are technically a lot better than Nigerian films but conceptually they're no better than average. They're better technically because they're much easier to make due to the fact they last 3-5 minutes, whereas as a film has to hold ones attention for 80-120 minutes.

Besides for a nice song, all one needs to find is a nice hotel room, some good looking scantily clad girls, a hit song, that's well shot, and that's it.

A movie needs a world class script, and to date there have been no world class scripts written in Nigeria, because there are no world class nigeria screen writers working in the industry yet. As things develope, we'll see world class movies being made here.

I agree with every thing except for 5:

5. Does this person strengthen my faith?

As a Christian, I believe God’s design for marriage is that a husband and wife come together with Christ in the Center. Without Him at the foundation, the marriage will eventually crumble. Marry someone who not only shares your faith but also strengthens your faith. Your spouse should bring you closer to Jesus, not drag you farther away.

Just marry someone who has a similar world view and shares your principles. People like to confuse and/or convince themselves that it's the word of GOD that shapes their world view, whereas it's just society, parents, media etc etc that shape them. The word of God comes in after to justify their opinions or ideas.

I think it's an important distinction.

95% of Nigerian women in my opinion care only about how much you're prepared to give them. You don't have to be a millionaire but you gotta have disposable income.

FIND ME AN INTELLECTUAL NIGERIAN WOMAN. I'm talking about the ones who know what's going on in the world beyond Channel E. The ones who read books other than the bible. Where are all the smart f-ing women. Damn. May have to marry an oyibo.

If Kanye can wear a skirt, this dude can wear a skirt.

Typical Nigerian reaction though, anyone that's different is evil, or possessed.... etc lets beat him with a stick.

OP....

As women become more educated, more empowered, they can start making more career choices. Not just let be married and have kids before am 30 because society says so. I don't think it's necessary that people marry just for the sake of it. The worlds over populated as it is.

Fhemmmy:

Cos now most men are no more going for women with no career.
Cos most women are no more into being an housewife
Cos some men are scared of ready made women
Cos some women are only looking for some quality that are found in barbie dolls

I like the above lots it true...

dougivilla

Ok! Ok!! Ok!!! We have heard all the arguments for against and neither. One thing common to all or that none disputed is that Nigeria is ina seriuos state of disrepair and requires an urgent fixing. Question is: WHAT IS THE WAY FORWARD? HOW DO WE FIX OUR COUNTRY AND REPOSITION IT FOR GREATNESS??

In the history of the world, it is citizens of a nation who have always been responsible for change... whether it's the orange revolution in the Ukraine, French Revolution, American Revolution, the civil rights movement, the movement to abolish slavery, woman's rights, gay rights, environmental activism, arab spring... changes always come from organised activism or protests from the people.

If you had 1million citizens camped outside Aso Rock day and night campaigning for say Nigeria to be able to refine it's own oil, light, water and basic social services it'd make 24 hour news across the world... You would start to see change. Unfortunately the vast majority of Nigerian's care only for themselves, aren't really prepared to fight for the next generation.

@Drunk

Wikileaks distraction again...funny so many youth are buying into this crap

Wikileaks isn't "crap" that people are buying into. They're 100% legitimate US diplomatic cables, leaked I believed by Wikileaks to three major news organisations namely The Guardian (London), The New York Times, and El Pais (Spain), and then later to the wider public via their website. Bradley Manning is currently facing charges of treason in States as he's the alledged source of leaks.

I guess they chose the above papers because they tend to the lean left in their politics.

Ok if CIA is involved with BH, why is the bombs going off in the north alone? Surely they are well sophisticated to carry out their activities in other parts of the county, no? Somebody answer abegi...

Re-read OPs post. The CIA are indirectly involved. They're not the ones doing the bombing, and certainly can't be seen to be involved in any kind of terrorist activities.